Finn’s mobile beeped. It was a message from Virginia.
‘Nite,’ it read.
Finn frowned and deleted the message. Then he switched to the contacts list on his mobile and scrolled down to his father’s phone number. Even accounting for the time difference, it was still too late to call. He tapped his thumb on the side of the phone for a moment, then pressed the connect button. He listened and waited for the phone to ring. Instead a recorded message told him that the person he had called was unavailable.
Finn left his bedroom and quietly made his way down to Evan’s room. He slipped inside and groped his way in the dark over to the bedside light, switching it on before sinking to the floor and leaning up against the single bed. The room didn’t smell of Evan anymore. It was just musty, overlaid with a tinge of cleaning product that his mother had probably used. A memory of Evan flashed into his head. A much younger Finn jumping off a bed into his older brother’s safe arms. Finn banged at the floor with his fist.
If only his father would come back home. Finn knew things could be better again.
He slipped back into his room and rang his father’s mobile one more time. And somehow just the sound of the operator’s message gave him some comfort.
15
SARAH
Did you ever see
such a thing
in your life?
THE MONDAY MORNING gossip in Year 7 was always the same thing. For the sporty kids, it was about which team had smashed which other team over the weekend or which player was carried off the ground/court/field. Anyone who suffered concussion received admiration, but a broken limb was the highest badge of courage. Then there were the birthday parties — speculation about who had kissed whom, who hadn’t been invited and who was wearing what.
The Monday morning gossip in Year 12 still centred on sport for the sporty kids and socialising for the party kids, but now the birthday parties were bigger and there were other parties — small gatherings or getting your licence celebrations or parties just for parties-sake. There was always talk of alcohol smuggled in backpacks and couples who had hooked up that night and sometimes even the police being called when a party got out of control.
I never went to a party alone, but sometimes I felt like the third wheel when Poppy, Nico and I went out together. Finn would sometimes come along, which made things a little easier, but he wasn’t much into crowds and he wouldn’t stay long. Later I would wonder if this was the real reason why I lost sight of him after we got to a party.
Sometimes Poppy and I would be threading our way through the crowd, heading for the dance floor, (not even Poppy could get Nico to dance) when I’d catch sight of Virginia and her crew, larger than life. I squeezed past her once in a bathroom and she nodded at me before turning her attention back to the mirror.
I had been dismissed.
16
VIRGINIA
Little Polly Flinders
sat among the cinders
warming her pretty little toes
VIRGINIA SLOAN HAD a headache the size of an elephant. She perched on the edge of her bed, one leg extended to her dressing table, as she carefully applied Pie in the Sky to each toe. No matter how much nail polish she put on, she thought, there was no disguising that she had ugly feet. Virginia examined the bunion on her right foot and calluses on her left that made buying nice shoes such a chore. They were strong feet. Dancer’s feet. She noted the beginnings of a blister on the back of her heel as she carefully fanned the polish on her toes before applying another coat.
It had been a hard morning. She’d woken up with the headache — just a dull throb then — at the base of her skull. She’d been late to dance class and missed out on stretch warm-ups. Her teacher had snapped that Virginia’s footwork was sloppy and her turns looked like something from a kindergarten playground.
‘Where is your spot, Virginia? Focus on your spot! Relax your neck. Relax! Now, again.’
Virginia’s head made it impossible to relax. She’d been out and it had been a dud — a total waste of time. Sparrow’s parties were getting boring — the same old people, same old music, nothing much exciting happening there.
It’s true that she’d vowed to the girls she’d stay away from Sparrow’s for a while. And it’s true that if she hadn’t had a fight with Finn, she would never have gone to Sparrow’s on Friday night, so technically her headache was Finn’s fault. Stupid Loz for putting that photo of her and Cooper on Facebook. Stupid Finn for looking.
Finn had rung her mobile early Friday morning. ‘Nice photo of you and Cooper.’
‘I told you I talked to Cooper,’ said Virginia, knowing that wasn’t quite true. ‘Let’s meet at the tunnel before school.’
‘No.’
‘Can I come around tonight?’
‘Boys’ poker night,’ said Finn.
‘Then I’ll see you at school—’
But Finn had hung up.
At school it was hard to know if Finn wasn’t talking to her because he was pretending or wasn’t talking to her because he really wasn’t talking to her. That’s when she’d decided to go to Sparrow’s that night, even though Loz had pointed out that it was social suicide.
Virginia caught sight of herself in the dressing table mirror as she fanned her toenails. She watched the way her long blonde hair hung in a silky curtain past her shoulders. She liked the lighter colour, courtesy of her last appointment at Slinky, and thought she’d keep it that way. She smoothed the frown lines between her brows and tilted her chin upwards to achieve a better jaw line silhouette. Was eighteen too young to have plastic surgery? She pushed the tip of her nose slightly so that it tilted upwards.
Her phone beeped and she grabbed it, sure it was Finn, but it was only Loz complaining of a hangover and wondering what Virginia was up to.
She checked her messages, but there was nothing from Finn.
Meanwhile, the throbbing in her head was stronger than ever. But no… Virginia looked out her window and saw the noise was actually Cooper using the whipper snipper around the garden beds. The lawn didn’t need going over with a mower every week at this time of year, but somehow Cooper was still here every weekend. He looked towards her window, as if he sensed her watching him, and Virginia shrank back against the curtains.
‘Where U?’ she texted Finn.
The noise outside stopped and moments later she heard the front door slam shut. She checked her phone once more, then threw it on the bed. She looked in the mirror, then changed her top, grabbed her drink bottle and moved to the kitchen. Sure enough, Cooper was sitting on a stool at the kitchen island bench while her mother was plying him with food and making a general fuss. He smelled like cheap deodorant, wet vegetation and sweat.
‘Oh, hi, Cooper,’ said Virginia, filling up her drink bottle with cold water from the fridge.
‘Virginia.’ Cooper didn’t look up at her.
‘Would you like something to eat, sweetheart?’ said her mother, and just for a split second Virginia thought that things had got really out of hand and that her mother was addressing Cooper.
‘No thanks,’ said Virginia with a frown.
‘Tom was just telling me he’s hiring a Jaguar to go to the Year 12 Formal.’
Virginia tilted her water bottle to her mouth and took a sip of water. ‘Cool.’
‘Have you organised to go with anyone yet?’ Virginia’s mother was making meaningful faces at her daughter while Cooper tucked into his toasted sandwiches. If it weren’t so pathetic it would have been funny.
‘I thought I’d go with Loz and some of the other girls,’ said Virginia.
‘Well, that’s not really a date…’ Her mother trailed off.
Virginia took another sip of water.
‘It’s not like the olden days, Mum. You don’t need a date to go to the Formal.’
Her mother bustled around the kitchen, tidying up, although there was nothing out of place. ‘Well, I don’t know, Virginia. Obviously I don’t know anything. Obvi
ously I’m just a dinosaur. Although, your sister Nicole had a date for the Formal and that wasn’t so long ago.’
‘That’s because she had a boyfriend,’ said Virginia coolly.
‘Well, she had time to have a boyfriend,’ said her mother. ‘What with your dancing and voice training and now this acting thing—’
‘It’s not a thing, Mum. And I did have a boyfriend, but you wrecked that.’
Cooper looked up from his plate. ‘Have you got a ride?’ he asked.
Virginia looked at him sharply, but his face was a mask of innocence. She shook her head. ‘I left that to Loz, but she is useless. She keeps promising—’
Cooper ducked his head. ‘There’s less than a month to go. You might not get anything special at short notice.’
Virginia laughed. ‘Just my luck, I’ll have to get there in a regular taxi.’
There was a pause, just long enough to hear the sound of a clock chime once from another room.
‘Well, there’s room in the Jag,’ said Cooper.
Virginia looked surprised, as if she hadn’t already considered that option. Her mother stilled her bustling for a moment without turning around.
‘Is there room for Loz?’ Virginia asked.
Her mother crashed a dish into the sink and Virginia’s head felt like it might explode.
Cooper finished the last of his toasted sandwich and licked his fingers before wiping them on his jeans. ‘Probably room for three of you,’ he said finally.
‘Hey, thanks,’ said Virginia. ‘Let me know how much to kick in for the car.’
‘My treat,’ said Cooper. ‘Better get back to it,’ he said as Virginia’s brother stood in the doorway. Cooper nodded to Oliver with a smile.
VIRGINIA WENT BACK to her room, shut the door and checked her mobile once more. There were a couple of new messages but nothing from Finn. She opened Facebook on her laptop and posted a new message on her wall.
‘Looking forward to being part of Cooper’s harem for the Year 12 Formal.’
She wished she could see Finn’s face when he found that message.
She peeked outside to see Cooper now bending over the garden edges pulling out weeds. She drew the curtains then lay down on her bed, her mobile under her pillow. The headache was now blasting the back of her skull. A light tap on the door announced her mother. No one else tapped that way.
‘Are you having a sleep?’ she asked.
‘Trying to,’ grunted Virginia. ‘I have a headache.’
‘What time did you get in last night?’ asked her mother. They both knew she already had that answer. ‘And who drove you home?’
‘Not sure what time it was,’ said Virginia. ‘And Marty drove me home. You don’t know him.’
‘Well, I hope he’s a safe driver, sweetheart. You do too much. Is it really necessary to rehearse on a Friday night? And so late—’
‘We can’t just turn off when rehearsal’s over, Mum. You don’t understand. We need to wind down.’
Actually, I was at a party, Mum, because I’m eighteen and I’m an adult and there’s nothing you can do about that. Except maybe stop my allowance.
‘I’ve got to fit it in sometime,’ said Virginia. Actually, I really do, she thought. Maybe she would go over her lines after a nap. ‘There’s another rehearsal tomorrow.’
‘Have you eaten today?’
‘Dad made me toast before dance class,’ Virginia lied.
‘Oh well… how about some lunch? I could make you some soup—’
‘No, really, thanks anyway.’
‘Have you taken something for your poor head?’
‘You know I hate taking stuff,’ said Virginia. She felt her phone vibrate under the pillow.
‘I’m going to get you something.’ Her mother stood in the doorway. ‘That was nice of Tom to ask you to the Formal.’
‘He offered me a lift, Mum. Me and the girls,’ said Virginia. Then she softened her tone. ‘I’m going to need a new dress. And my hair and makeup done.’
‘Maybe we could go shopping tomorrow,’ said her mother. ‘Before rehearsal?’
‘Okay.’ Virginia didn’t want to shop with her mother, who would pull out totally inappropriate dresses and talk to the shop assistants as if they were old friends. And her mother knew so many people that they would have to stop every five minutes so that she could say, ‘Oh, I’m just shopping with my daughter, Virginia. You know Mrs X, Virginia?’ Even though Virginia had no idea who all these old women were. And then they would go on and on about people she didn’t know until finally they went to another shop so that her Mum could pull out more inappropriate clothes. Maybe she could organise to meet Loz and the girls somewhere after an hour of shopping with her mother. If only she had her own credit card. Maybe she’d ask her dad about that.
The mobile under her pillow vibrated again and she ignored it.
The door swung open, and Oliver leaned against the doorjamb.
‘Are you seriously going to the Formal with Cooper?’ he asked.
‘Go away,’ said Virginia.
‘What about Finn?’ he demanded.
‘We broke up at Christmas. Remember?’
‘Oh. I thought…’ Oliver shrugged.
‘Anyway, I’m not going to the Formal with Cooper. We’re just sharing a ride.’
The mobile vibrated again.
‘Virginia… Cooper’s a freak.’
Virginia raised herself on one elbow and looked at her brother. He looked so earnest, like an older brother instead of the little kid he still was.
‘Hey, Ollie, it’s okay. I’m not hooking up with Cooper.’
‘Well, that’s not what Mum thinks.’
‘Yeah well—’
‘Here we go.’ Mrs Sloan sailed into the bedroom and handed some capsules over to her daughter. ‘Leave your sister alone, Oliver. Come and help me in the kitchen.’
Mrs Sloan fiddled with the curtains so not one chink of light could get through and then closed the door behind her with an annoying click. The air from the ducted heating was making Virginia hot. Or maybe she had a fever? She stripped down to her underwear before climbing under the doona, then pulled her mobile out from under the pillow. Three messages. All from Finn.
‘LOST MONY AT POKR LAST NITE SHOULD HAV STAYD HOM’
‘KNW YOUR JST USNG COOPR MAK SUR U RMMBR THT’
‘CAN I C U 2NITE?’
Virginia clicked on her phone’s camera roll icon and scrolled through photos of her and Finn. It was like looking at a couple of strangers. Pretending to be like Romeo and Juliet wasn’t as fun as she had thought it would be. She missed seeing Finn whenever she wanted to. She’d decided to pretend until the end of Year 12 when she and Finn would go off and have their own private Schoolies. It would keep her mother off her back until then, keep the cash coming, and wouldn’t be for too much longer.
Virginia scrolled back further through her photos and there she was. The girl they had left behind. Virginia had been dying to tell someone about how she had seen the body. Had been tempted to drop a hint or two to Tamara and Loz, but the thought of her father kept her quiet. If he found out that she had been in The Woods with Finn…
Virginia would never forget the day her father had found her scrambling back through her bedroom window after a late night visit to Finn. He hadn’t yelled at her but there was something chilling about the way he quietly asked her questions until she broke down and confessed. That was the night she agreed to break up with Finn. Her father had offered her a choice. Leave home right now, leave everything behind, or break up with ‘that useless piece of goods’.
Virginia daydreamed about the life she would have. About the time she’d have her own money and not have to rely on her father. She’d do her time in theatre, but it was film she was really interested in. She knew her dance teacher would be furious with her, but dance had started to lose its shine for Virginia. Already there were younger, skinnier dancers looking to knock her off her throne at the ballet school.
She understood their need to succeed; once she’d been focused like them, but it was getting harder as life became more complicated.
She’d probably have to move to Hollywood if she was going to make it in film. Finn could go with her. As a manager, maybe, or her bodyguard or something.
Lying back against the pillows, she returned to her messages. Then she snapped a photo of herself and sent it to Finn.
‘C U 2nite.’
He really was cute and she really shouldn’t be so mean to him, she thought, as she drifted off to sleep.
17
SARAH
I wish I may
I wish I might
have this wish
I wish tonight
IN THE SECOND week of winter Aunt Lili had her baby, a girl called Betsy, I turned eighteen, and my parents gave me a car. That present hadn’t been part of the plan. I’d been saving money from my cafe shifts and Poppy and I had been checking out carsales.com and dreaming. It was months before Nico was going to be old enough to get his licence and Poppy had turned eighteen before me but she didn’t even have her Learner’s permit yet. Still, she had definite plans for all three of us when I got my Ps. So I hadn’t been expecting it, but there it was when I woke up that birthday morning, all shiny and nearly new in the driveway, wearing my L-plates. I cried I was so happy. Actually cried. As a girl who hardly ever cried, this was very embarrassing.
‘Happy birthday,’ my father said in his understated way. ‘You are a good girl, Sarah. You will make a very fine doctor.’
A stray cloud scudded over the weak winter sun and my shining silver present diminished a little in the dull Monday morning light.
Dad went on to show me all the safety features of the car. Then he opened up the bonnet and showed me where the oil and water needed filling. Then where the spare tyre lived. Then how to open up the petrol cap from the inside of the car.
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