Finding Serenity

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Finding Serenity Page 17

by Amanda Perry


  "You really don't care that I'm a grown ass man living in a house my parents bought for me?" His question is barely a whisper, almost like he doesn't want to break the peacefulness of the moment.

  I don't take my eyes from the sky as I answer, and from my peripheral view, I know he doesn't either. "Why would that bother me? I think it's kind of amazing your parents would do that for you. They must really care about you."

  "They do. My parents live for me and my sister. They spoiled us rotten and somehow managed to keep us from being jerks at the same time."

  "Do they live close?" I ask when he pauses.

  He makes a sound of confirmation. "They're only about an hour from here. They retired a few years ago, but they didn't want to move, said they wanted to stay where my sister and I are. It doesn't surprise me. When I was in the marines they hated me being gone for so long. I think the house was their gift to me for getting out."

  My head pops up, and I gape at him. "They bought you a house after you left the marines?"

  He nods wearily. "Yeah, it was kind of a literal welcome home gift."

  "Holy crap." I bite my lip and gaze over the exterior of the two-story brick house. It isn't a flashy house from the outside, which is impressive since there are a grand total of six bedrooms inside. "Was it a gift for all four of you? Didn't you guys go into the marines together?"

  “My parents love them as much as they love me, so they made sure there was enough room in the house for the four of us. They were pissed when I told them we’d all enlisted in the marines. That was Maverick’s fault though.” He chuckles. “He thought the rest of us would let him enlist alone. He’s a lot smarter now than he was back then. He finally learned we won’t let him do crazy shit alone.”

  "You guys are more like family than friends." It isn't a question, but he nods anyway. I first noticed their bond in the hospital. The more time I spend with them, the more the strength of the bond is evident. They're brothers for life, not just friends. It reminds me a lot of Michelle and Evelyn—the three of us are sisters at heart. Nothing would ever change that for us. The guys are the same way.

  "How are your sore muscles?"

  Allistar’s question pulls me from my musings, and I roll my head to face him again. "Horrible. You've probably ruined my body with your vicious torture you call a simple workout."

  "And the Academy Award goes to..." He chuckles and shakes his head at me. He runs a wet hand through his dark blond hair. The long, slicked back part on top darkens to brown from the water and droplets slide down the shaved sides. One drop of water slides onto his temple, and before my brain catches up to my body, I find myself raising my hand to wipe it away with my thumb. My fingers wrap around the side of his neck. The light stubble showing since this morning’s shave scratches my fingertips. I wonder what it would feel like under my lips.

  At my unexpected move, Allistar turns toward me. His eyes widen, and I don't understand why. In case he doesn't want to be touched, I pull my arm back. His left hand shoots out, grabbing my wrist to stop me. His glowing green eyes study me for a long time. He keeps a gentle hold on my wrist. While he searches for something on my face, I don't dare move, afraid he might let me go.

  After several long beats, he gives my arm a gentle tug. The sudden movement causes my body to easily slide from the bench to him. He wraps his free hand around my hip and pulls me closer.

  "I have an idea." The roughness in his voice wraps around me, bringing my body to life.

  Before I'm able to answer him, I lick my lips and take deep breaths. His eyes dart down to my mouth at the move, so I do it again, slower the second time.

  "What idea?" My voice barely comes out as a whisper, but I take pride in my ability to even form words in the first place.

  He squeezes my hip once, then uses his hand to spin me around, my back pressed to his front. He slides his arm around my waist, his hand on my ribs. His breath ghosts against my ear. "Kneel on the bench seat."

  The right thing to do would be to ask him why or simply get out of the hot tub and go to my room. Even a jump in the cold pool to calm myself down would have been a smart idea. Good thing no one ever accused me of being smart.

  Without hesitation, I scoot onto my knees on the bench. My chest comes right to the edge of the hot tub, but Allistar places his hands on the top of my shoulders and applies light pressure. I take the hint and drop my butt to my heels. He keeps his hands on my shoulders, and as soon as he gets me into a position he likes, he digs his thumbs into the muscle of my shoulders.

  "Oh my god," I gasp and groan at the same time.

  "Like my idea?" He laughs when I groan loudly again. A massage from Allistar may be the best thing I've ever experienced.

  His fingers are magic as they work out the soreness of my arms, shoulders, and back muscles. He's thorough but gentle. It hurts in a delicious way. He slowly works his way down my spine, knots and kinks melting as he goes. Between the heat of the water and Allistar’s work on my muscles, the soreness eases away. I melt into a puddle of blissful serenity under his touch.

  When he reaches the bottom of my spine, I arch my back into his hands. It feels incredible and my body instinctively moves to him.

  Allistar's hands pause but don't move away. At first, I want to cry out and tell him to keep rubbing, but his abruptness stops me. He slides both of his hands around my sides and grabs my hips. His strong hands pull my hips hard into his, showing me without words how affected he is by the massage.

  “You like that?” His low, gravelly tone wraps around me, giving me chills of pleasure.

  “Mhm.”

  My moaned response makes him gasp and tighten his hands on my hips. “You’re driving me crazy, Taylor.”

  “Good,” I breathe out. My chest rises and falls rapidly with each quick breath I take. There’s no way for me to steady my body. “You’re doing the same to me. Fair is fair.”

  With the sun finally set for the night, the moon gives us our only source of muted light. Allistar turns me slowly to face him. With his hands still firmly on my hips, he backs us to the opposite side of the hot tub and sits down. He pulls me onto his lap and positions me to straddle him. The moon gives off just enough light for me to make out his features. His eyes are hooded, his jaw clenched. Allistar always appears put together and in control. To witness him on the verge of losing control makes me want to push him over the edge.

  My hands slide up and run through his hair, giving the ends a light tug. He closes his eyes and moans low and deep.

  His arms wrap around my back to pull me forward until our chests touch and his lips stop less than an inch from mine. “If you don’t want me to kiss you, then say so now.”

  I press my lips to his lightly once, then twice. He takes the hint and deepens the kiss. His lips coax mine open. I press into him harder as his tongue teases mine. He goes slowly, exploring every inch of my mouth.

  His hands slowly roam over my body. He rubs my hips like he did my shoulders. He moves up my sides and over my ribs. His fingertips play with the bottom of my sports bra. His touch becomes too intense, and I can’t handle his teasing anymore. His hands need to be on me, now.

  Pulling away from the kiss takes effort, but it’s worth it when I grab the sports bra and whip it off. Allistar sucks in a breath, his gaze devouring my naked breasts. He brings his thumbs to the sides of my breasts and strokes them lightly. My eyes flutter, and my hands seek out his shoulders. I might float away if I don’t anchor myself to him. He’s barely touched me, and my body is a live wire.

  “You’re gorgeous.” My eyes open to find Allistar’s gaze on my face. He leans forward and takes my mouth in a slow, thorough kiss that drives me into a frenzy of need. Heat pools low in my belly as his hands slide over my nipples, tugging them into tight buds.

  All ability to form a rational thought disappears completely when Allistar pushes his hips up into mine, his hardness making sweet contact in exactly the right spot.

  Breaking the kiss, I
throw my head back and gasp. My hips rock against his, desperate for a repeat of the sensation. Allistar groans loudly when I press myself hard into his lap. The sound of his pleasure snaps any control I may have left. I reach between us and pull the tie of his swim shorts. My feet plant on the floor of the hot tub long enough for me to hook my fingers into the waistband and pull them down. He kicks his legs to push them the rest of the way off.

  My hands run up his heaving chest then back down into the water between us. I find his thickness and stroke once. He lets out a strangled cry, and I smile in satisfaction. Allistar notices the smile, and I watch as he gets his own cat-that-ate-the-canary grin. He takes hold of my hips once more and slides me off his lap. My brow draws together, and I growl in protest.

  He only chuckles as he leans forward to pull one nipple into his mouth and drag my workout shorts down my legs at the same time. My knees buckle when his hand comes to massage my other breast. He wraps his free arm around my waist. My fingers go to his hair, tugging and grabbing as if it might give me some control. Allistar pulls his mouth away from my sensitive nipple, laying a trail of open-mouthed kisses to my shoulder, then up my neck, stopping by my ear. “If you get to touch me, it’s only fair I get to touch you.”

  “I want to see you,” I whisper.

  He pulls back and quirks one perfect brow. “I’m right here, see?” He smirks, and I know he’s messing with me.

  “Please. I need to see you.” I want to sound sultry and seductive, but instead, my voice comes out as a desperate plea.

  Allistar pulls away from me but continues to face me as he lifts himself up onto the edge of the hot tub. The air in my lungs disappear—he is perfection with hard and smooth muscles covering his body. It’s clear he works out a lot, and at the moment, I can appreciate the torture sessions. The treasure at the end of the trail I desperately wanted to find earlier is on clear display, and I hit the jackpot.

  When he reaches his hand out to me, I take it without hesitation. My need for him consumes me. He helps me stand on the bench seat, but I need to be closer to him. With my hands on his shoulders, I press lightly, and he follows my lead by lying back on the smooth, cool concrete. Without giving him time to ask questions, I climb out of the hot tub and straddle him once more. This time lining my core up with his length. He grunts when his tip touches my wet entrance, and I grin down at him.

  He pushes his hips up, sliding an inch of himself into me, and my grin disappears. My body takes over with the need to take all of him. I sink down until he’s fully seated inside of me and drop my forehead to his. Both of us take a second to catch our breath, but the urge to move rapidly becomes overwhelming. With my hands on his chest, I push myself up and rock my hips. He hits just the right spot deep inside of me, and I nearly scream. I rock into him again, desperate to find the relief I crave. He throws his head back, arching his back and groaning loudly.

  To watch him so uninhibited spurs me on, my pace quickening. Allistar grips my hips to hold me tight against him while still allowing me the liberty to set the pace. He fights his desire for control, but when I rotate my hips, he snaps.

  With one quick motion, Allistar sits up, one of his arms going around my waist to hold me to him, the other cradling the back of my head. He presses his lips to mine, the kiss surprisingly soft and gentle. While he kisses me thoroughly, I continue to rock into him. My hands roam over his body, unable to find one place to hold on. His smooth, hard skin under my fingertips drives me crazy, and I never want to stop touching him.

  Allistar pulls away from my mouth, clenching his jaw. “I’m close, sweetheart. I need you to go with me.” His hand slides down my chest, over my stomach, then farther south. He reaches his destination, and with one quick circle of his finger over my clit, I completely shatter in his arms. My hips jerk rapidly, and my body shutters and shakes. My head drops back, and I cry out his name over and over. He moans low and long, pressing into me with his release. He grips my hips and slows my frantic pace. Allistar drops light kisses all over my face and neck while he works us both back down to reality. My body leans into him, replete and ready for rest. He lays one final, lingering kiss on my forehead while holding me. The moment couldn’t be more perfect.

  It stays perfect until the opening sounds of the garage door on the side of the house hits me like being thrown into the freezing pool. Panic grips my chest, and I jump off Allistar to race toward the house. Thank God he remembered to bring towels outside for us. I manage to grab one by the back door on my way into the house and wrap it around my naked body. Allistar calls after me, but I keep running. It’s anyone’s guess who opened the garage since Marak, Syn, and Maverick all had things going on tonight. The thought of any of them catching me with Allistar makes my heart race, and my feet shuffle faster across the wooden floors.

  Taking the stairs two at a time, I hear a door open and shut downstairs. Whoever came home is inside the house now, but I’m able to get into my room before anyone can notice me. Before I close my door, I hear Syn. “Hey, Allistar. What are you doing up so late? I figured you and Taylor would be asleep by now.”

  “Yeah, I, uh, couldn’t sleep.” He hesitates, and I hold my breath, afraid he’ll tell Syn what happened. “I decided to get in a few laps in the pool.”

  “Cool, I’m heading to bed. Today was long ass fuck, and I’m exhausted. You’re lucky you got to go with Taylor today instead of coming with us.” Syn doesn’t sound like he suspects anything, and I let out the breath I was holding.

  Allistar mumbles something about being tired and going to bed also, but I close my door without a sound when footsteps hit the stairs.

  Dropping back onto my bed, I cover my face with my hands and silently scream. Less than two weeks ago, I couldn’t control myself with Marak, and now, the same thing happens with Allistar. The worst part about it is the way they make me feel. As much as I wanted things to stay casual, my heart won’t listen to my plans. Something about the dirty-minded goofiness of Marak, and the gentle, caring nature of Allistar hits me hard. Marak hasn’t mentioned our night together, and if I’m lucky, Allistar won’t either. Maybe it’s all casual to them, and they’ll forget about me the second I leave here.

  It’s bad enough I lost control and slept with Marak and Allistar. It’s worse I can’t stop my feelings for Syn and Maverick as well. Even now, I want to go hug Syn and welcome him back.

  If one of the guys finds out about what I’ve done, they’re going to be pissed. They might kick me out on the spot and probably never speak to me again. The possibility makes my chest squeeze painfully, and I bring my hand up to rub the hurt away.

  Even with the chance of someone finding out, I don’t regret tonight. He made me feel cared for and wanted. He was gentle and sweet with me.

  My poor mind can’t keep up with the racing thoughts. I roll over and growl into the covers. The only way to prevent this is to stay far away from them. In their presence, I can’t control myself, and my brain turns to mush along with my body. My resolve to distance myself from the four of them hardens when I consider what they’d say or do to each other if they found out. I refuse to break up their friendship, their family. I’m a passing fling; they’re brothers. They need each other more than anything, and I need to make sure I don’t break up their bond.

  16

  Taylor

  My plan works for the most part. One of the guys still comes to work with me daily, though it usually ends up being Maverick because he insists the guys have more to do at work than him. Only once did Allistar come with me to work since our night together. He remained his normally quiet, caring self, with no mention of our night in the hot tub. Part of me relaxed in relief when nothing changed; the other part of me hurt, bad. The same way it hurts when Marak ignores our time together. It’s hypocritical of me to be upset about it when I can’t even force myself to pick a favorite. Instead, I end up sleeping with two best friends. I’m going to hell.

  With the constant reminder to myself of their frien
dship, I can’t trust myself around any of them. Aside from being escorted to and from work, I keep to myself and stay in my room. It’s the only way I can be sure I won’t throw myself at one of them, or all of them. No one in my past ever broke my self-control. Yet all four of them manage to make me lose any sense of rational or self-control with a simple look or a touch.

  My plan to stay away from them works well until the following Friday. Somehow, they all make it home for dinner, and Syn cooks us burgers. It’s the first time all week the five are together for dinner. Syn asks me to join them, and I can’t say no to his hopeful, puppy dog eyes. Every time he looks at me, I want to laugh and hug him all at once. How he manages it, I’ll never know.

  While we eat dinner, the guys chat about work and other crap I don’t understand. My focus remains on my burger, devouring it as fast as possible. I don’t want to be a jerk, but even sitting around eating dinner with them makes my heart race.

  Syn coughs hard, and it pulls my attention from my plate. “That’s the fourth coughing fit you’ve had tonight. Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m good.” He brushes off my concern with a wink. It’s like he’s determined to melt my panties off.

  With the last of my burger still in my mouth, I jump up and rush through cleaning the kitchen. My goal may be to get away from all the crazy male hotness, but I’m not going to leave the mess for the four of them to clean up. Especially when Syn cooked. The guys finish their food around the time I finish the last counter. I throw out half-assed goodnights and head off to my room. Four sets of eyes burn holes in my back as I rush away like a coward.

  What feels like moments—but is probably more like hours—after I fall asleep, I’m startled awake. It takes my brain a few long, fuzzy seconds to catch up and figure out what woke me. Someone’s loud coughs echo through the halls. Worried someone could be really sick or hurt, I jump up and rush to my door. Flinging it open and stepping into the hall, I nearly run into Syn. I struggle to gain my footing. But my feet move faster than my brain, and I stumble. He jumps in surprise and catches me before I faceplant on the hardwood.

 

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