There isn’t much traffic, and I make it to Springfield in just over two hours, as I pull into mom’s I see Katelynn run from the house to my truck. I smile when I see the happiness on her face. I park the truck and get out of the truck and brace myself. I’m hit at full force by a giggling four year old.
“Uncle Sammy, you’re here!” She has so much enthusiasm; I look up at the porch and see my mom standing there. Fuck, in the last few months she has aged so much. She looks tired, I feel like a bastard, she has so much to deal with already; I should be helping her out more. I pick up Katelynn and spin her around listening to her laughter.
“Is that my little Buttercup? It can’t be, you’re not small you’re like a mini giant.” I say looking around. She laughs even more, I start walking towards the house with her in my arms.
“No, I’ve just grown, Grandma says I’ve grown at least a couple of feet.” That causes me to laugh, she’s grown about an inch and a half since I saw her last.
“You mean a couple of inches?” I ask and let her down, as soon as her feet touch the ground her hands go to her hips.
“That is what I said. You’re going deaf.” With that she stamps her foot and runs to my mom, laughing as she does. I walk up the porch steps and mom walks over to me.
“Hey Samuel, you look happy. What’s her name?” Fuck! How the hell did she know?
“How do you know?” I ask her and she gives me that look that says ‘I’m your mother’.
“How does grandma know what?” I forgot how freaking nosy Katelynn was before I can tell her to go back inside mom speaks.
“Your Uncle Sam has a girlfriend.” She says it in a weird tone, almost if she’s having trouble believing it. Katelynn doesn’t say anything, just stares at me.
“You ready Buttercup? We have a full day ahead of us.” She nods, but isn’t happy like I thought she would be.
“So what’s her name Samuel?” I sigh, she isn’t going to give up.
“Winter.” Her eyes light up when I say it.
“Oh, my Samuel is in love!” What the fuck. I look at her and see she has a fucking goofy smile on her face.
“What the hell mom? Why would you even think that?” She stands up taller and places her hands on her hips and I realize just where Katelynn gets her attitude from.
“Samuel Christian Mitchell. I gave birth to you, I know you. The sparkle in your eye, it means you’re in love. So tell me everything!” I sigh and give in because she is relentless. She won’t stop until I tell her everything.
“I met her about a month ago, she’s amazing mom.” Her face softens and she smiles. I start to walk into the house.
“You’re just like your daddy, he fell hard and fast. He loved fiercely and with his whole heart. So why didn’t you bring her? I want to meet my daughter in law.” I’m stopped dead in my tracks.
“Daughter in law?” I think I may have choked saying that. I look at mom and see her standing there looking at me with a weird expression.
“Yes Samuel, my daughter in law. I’ve told you already, you are your father’s son. You love this girl, and although you may not be thinking about it yet, you will marry her, so why didn’t you bring her?” She is right, Winter is my future and I will marry her, but nobody needs to know the crazy thoughts going through my head, least not Winter, she has a lot going on right now and she doesn’t need that pressure added to her.
“Mom, she is going through some things right now,” I tell her and I know that isn’t going to cut it.
“Samuel, what is going on? Is she in trouble?” I look at my mom and I see the worry in her eyes, although I don’t want to betray Winter I need someone to talk to.
“Come on mom let’s get you a cup of tea and we will talk.” I see the fear in her eyes and I feel like a fucker. We walk into the kitchen, both of us silent and I make her a cup of tea while she sits at the kitchen table. I walk over to her and hand her the tea.
“I’ll be back in a minute mom; I just want to check on Katelynn.” She nods, her face still etched in worry, I have really missed her, damn I’m such an asshole, I don’t live that far away I should have come home more often. I walk down the hall and go to Katelynn’s bedroom door and for the second time today I’m stuck rooted to where I stand. I watch as she picks up a picture, I know it’s a picture of her dad, she asked me the last time I was home if she could have one in her bedroom and I brought her one and she decorated it. She starts speaking to it.
“Daddy, Uncle Sammy has a girlfriend that means he’s not going to see me anymore. I heard Sammy telling grandma that she’s not here because she’s going through things. I don’t even know what that is but it doesn’t sound good. Grandma’s face changed. Sammy is going to leave me. I wonder if I can live with him.” I scrub my hands down my face and take a deep breath. She carries on speaking; she doesn’t know that I’m here. “I miss you, daddy. I know that you are in heaven but I don’t know where mom went. Can you help me find her? We can all live with Uncle Sammy.” Fuck!
“Buttercup?” Damn, my voice sounds hoarse even to my own ears. Fuck what do you tell a four-year-old? I watch as she raises her head and looks at me, her face looks so sad, I watch as her tears fall down her tiny face. I walk into her room and sit on the bed beside her.
“Katelynn, I’m not going to leave you, I promise.” She looks so fucking sad. I don’t know what to do.
“But you have a girlfriend; she’s not going to want me around.” Why would she even think that?
“Winter isn’t like that; she will be really sad that you think that.” It’s the god’s honest truth.
“How do you know that? She may hate me!” She shouts and bursts into tears.
“Buttercup, do you want to know what she calls you?” She doesn’t stop crying but nods. “She calls you a little princess.” Her head pops up and she sniffs.
“A princess? Really?” She has finally stopped crying but her eyes are still wet.
“Yep, she told me to have a good day with the little princess.” She doesn’t believe me, I can tell by the look on her face. “Okay, hold on.” I go into my pocket and take out my cell, I call Winters phone and put it on loud speaker, Katelynn’s looks at the phone as we hear it ringing.
“Hey you! How’s the little princess?” Nice, not even how I am just how’s Katelynn.
“She’s upset; she thinks now I have a girlfriend I’m leaving her.” Katelynn has a massive smile on her face.
“Okay Sammy, will you do me a favor? Will you give the little princess the phone and let me talk to her?” I see Katelynn’s eyes light up with the thought of speaking to Winter.
“Okay, Sweets.” I hand Katelynn the phone and watch as she talks to Winter.
“Hello?” Katelynn says quietly, she is extremely shy around people.
“Hey little princess, I heard you're very sad,” Winter says in a very gentle tone and I watch as Katelynn’s body relaxes.
“Yeah, I miss my mommy and daddy, and I miss Uncle Sammy. Do you think I could live with Uncle Sammy? Maybe Mommy can come and live with us?” Fuck, listening to my four-year-old niece say that makes me want to kill my sister, the greedy selfish bitch.
“Oh well, now princess, what would your grandma think? Would she be lonely if you went to stay with your Uncle Sammy?” Comes Winter’s velvet voice. She says it so gently keeping Katelynn calm.
“Grandma will be really sad, she won’t have anyone here with her and will mommy know where I am?” I hear Winter’s breath catch, and I know she’s on the verge of tears.
“Yeah, little princess your mommy will know where you are.” Her voice is full of emotion.
“Okay, I’ll stay with Grandma, Uncle Sammy has you. Do you promise that he won’t be lonely and that he won’t leave me?” Damn, she’s so freaking cute.
“Yeah Princess, I promise that I’ll look after Sammy and that he won’t leave you.” I hear the tears in her voice and I know Winter’s crying.
“Okay, but will you come and see
me next time?” Katelynn asks her and I smile, my little Buttercup has made a new friend.
“I would love too. I can’t wait to meet you, little princess.” I fucking love that woman. She has made my niece one happy little lady.
“Me too, I can’t wait to see you. We should do girly stuff.” I laugh and hide it in a cough when I see the look Katelynn is giving me.
“Hmm, so Sammy is being nosey. Well little princess, when we meet we will go on a shopping spree and Uncle Sammy is coming too.” Umm, say what? I fucking hate shopping.
“Oh yes! That will be so much fun. I can’t wait. When can we do it?” Her enthusiasm has me regretting this phone call just a bit. Winter is really quiet and hasn’t answered Katelynn’s question.
“Sweets? Are you okay?” Katelynn is still smiling; she hasn’t noticed Winter’s silence.
“What? Oh, yeah. Um, Katelynn, how about we make a date the next time we talk?” Katelynn starts to squeal she stands on her bed and starts to bounce. I take off the loud speaker and put the phone to my ear.
“I’m going shopping huh?” I say to her and I hear her laugh.
“Yep, who else is going to hold all of our bags?” I laugh at that, I know she’s joking, but it’s something that will probably end up happening.
“Everything okay Sweets?” I hear her sigh, and I see Katelynn is still bouncing on the bed.
“Yeah, just you called at the perfect time, Maddie’s here and I just want to kill her. Ugh! Seriously how was I ever friends with her? How is everything with you?” What the fuck has that bitch done now?
“What’s going on Winter? Things are good, I’m going to talk to mom, and then take Buttercup to the park.” Katelynn starts squealing again, she loves the park.
“Just bullshit, don’t worry I’m fine, and I’ll tell you all about it tonight. Go have a good time with your mom and Katelynn, I love you, Sammy.” I don’t think I’ll ever get sick of hearing her say that.
“I love you too Sweets, be safe and I’ll see you tonight.” I hear her sigh down the phone and know that she has a smile on her face, she always does when I tell her I love her. We hang up and I turn to Katelynn.
“Are you okay Buttercup?” She’s still jumping and I can hear the bed creaking. “Stop jumping or you’ll go through the bed.” She stops and stares at me.
“You’re no fun, when are we going to the park?” She says whilst giving me a death glare mom must be teaching her and at four years old she has it almost perfected.
“We will be going in a while, why don’t you watch a movie and we’ll go after that?” Her face lights up, and I pray she’s over her Peppa Pig obsession, she starts squealing again and runs out of the room, she comes back with fucking Frozen in her hands.
“Uncle Sammy do you think Winter will watch Frozen with me when she comes here?” I hope Winter doesn’t hate me.
“Yeah, Buttercup. So you watch frozen and I’ll talk to grandma, then we’ll go to the park okay?” She nods and puts Frozen on and runs back so she’s sitting on the bed for the beginning. I leave her and walk back into the kitchen where mom is cleaning things that have probably been cleaned ten times this morning already. As soon as she realizes I’m here she stops and walks back to the table. I follow her and sit, I don’t want to talk about what happened to Winter, but yet I need to.
“Okay Samuel, what’s going on?” She looks so frightened.
“Okay, Winter has a mad man after her. She doesn’t want anyone hurt by him so she’s staying away. She is currently at Sophia’s dad’s house, he is a cop and his son is a P.I.” Mom looks at me as if I’m crazy.
“She should have come here! We would have looked after her. What’s this crazy doing to her?” Fuck. I swallow back the anger and tell mom everything.
“Four years ago Winter was raped. She reported it but she couldn’t report him, he called her a few times, threatening her and her friends. So she fled to Maui, he found her there and made some calls again, but this time she has the courage to stand up to him.” Mom has tears in her eyes.
“She sounds amazing but why would you think he’ll hurt someone?” I scrub my hands down my face and sigh.
“Because he killed someone yesterday. He killed Sophia’s fiancé’s best friend and Winter has so much guilt. He also shot Ryder who is currently in the hospital.” Mom gasps and places her hand on her heart.
“Oh, my! That poor girl. I’m going to make up some food for you to take home with you, keep her fed Samuel, if not she’ll forget to eat. My heart hurts for her Samuel.” I haven’t had a home-cooked meal in a while.
“Mom, how about you tell me what’s going on with you?” She sighs and looks over at me.
“I get tired easily, I’m getting old Sammy and Katelynn needs a lot of attention, I feel as though I’m failing her.” I get up and walk over to her and hug her.
“Mom, you are not failing her but you’re right she does need a lot of attention, we should see about putting her into some sort of class or something.” Mom’s eyes light up.
“Oh I know the perfect thing, they are starting a Gymnastics class at the community center, we could enroll her in that. Oh, she would love it.” She has a smile on her face.
“Yeah mom, that actually sounds like something she would enjoy, so we will enroll her in gymnastics, and I’ll come by more often.” She turns and kisses my cheek.
“I’m so proud of you Samuel, you have grown into an amazing man.” I kiss her cheek.
“You raised me, mom, so it’s all down to you,” I say making her laugh and then I walk into Katelynn’s room, she is dancing and singing as she watches Frozen. I stand and watch and thank god that my stupid sister did something right in her life.
“You ready to go Buttercup?” She spins and her face lights up, she sits on the bed and puts her shoes on, then runs over to me.
“Yes, let’s go.” Bossy little thing. She runs out of the room and into the kitchen, she says goodbye to my mom and runs out of the front door.
“Bye mom, I’ll see you in a bit.” She waves at me from the kitchen where she is currently chopping vegetables. I walk out and see Katelynn is bouncing up and down on her feet by my truck. I get to her side and open the door, I pick her up and put her in the seat and fasten the seat belt. I walk around to the driver’s side and get in.
We arrive at the park and its quiet, once out of my truck she runs straight for the slides. I walk down to the swings and sit on one, glad that we’re alone. I pull out my phone and send Winter a text.
Me: Hey Sweets, are you okay?
Sweets: Maddie’s just left. I’m going to have a nap. I love you.
Me: Okay, I love you too. I’ll see you soon Sweets.
Sweets: Can’t wait X
I wonder what the hell has happened, I’m about to call Soph when it starts to rain. I mean it pours, within seconds I’m soaked. I walk over to Katelynn and see she hides under the slide, there’s a little house under there. I wonder if I’ll be able to fit. So I look around and see that yes we still are both alone and try it, I get on my knees and start to crawl into it. Once I’m inside, I stand and realize that I fit. I see Katelynn’s face as she looks at me. I’m soaked, and the knees of my jeans are caked in mud. My hands are too. Great.
“You’re silly Uncle Sammy.” I laugh at her, and I sit down beside her. I wipe my hands on the grass that is the floor.
“So what do you think of joining a group or starting a class? Make some new friends?” She’ll be starting Kindergarten in the fall.
“What can I do?” She is looking at me with her knees tucked up and her elbows on her knees and hands on her chin.
“Well, what do you think about doing gymnastics?” She smiles and nods her head.
“Emily goes to that too. When can I go?” She jumps up and down squealing.
“As soon as we get it set up, okay Buttercup we need to have a serious conversation.” She looks at me with her serious face, we do this when we need to talk about things like when I to
ld her I was moving to New York or when I told her that her mommy and daddy weren’t coming back.
“Okay, Uncle Sammy.” I sigh, I hate fucking breaking her heart.
“I heard you talking to your daddy earlier, and you were saying that you wanted your mommy. Buttercup, your mommy, isn’t coming back. She did something really bad and isn’t allowed to leave where she is.” Fuck, how do you make a four year old realize that their mom is in prison and never coming out?
“Is it because she killed daddy?” I look at her and wonder who told her that.
“Buttercup, where did you hear that?” She has tears in her eyes.
“Grandma said it, she was on the phone, and she said that mommy killed daddy, and now I’m never going to see any of them again.” Fuck, I’ve told mom about watching what she says.
“Yeah Buttercup, your mommy hurt your daddy and he died, she’s in prison and she won’t be coming home.” She is crying now and I pick her up, her sobs are going through her whole body, I can feel them and it makes me feel useless. I sit here with her in my arms rocking her until she calms down.
“Uncle Sammy, why would mommy do that? Why would she hurt daddy? It’s not nice to hurt people. Now daddy’s in heaven.” This girl is trying to gut me.
“I don’t know Buttercup, that is something we may never know.” She nods at me and sighs I feel her head rubbing against my t-shirt as she sniffs and I know that she has just wiped her nose and face on me.
“Come on Buttercup, let’s get you some ice cream before we go back to Grandma’s.” She sits up and smiles and climbs off my lap.
“Come on Uncle Sammy, I want a big one. Loads and loads of chocolate. Oh and sprinkles and sauce.” I laugh at her and get back onto my knees and crawl out of this tiny playhouse. It’s still raining when we get out and as soon as I stand I pick up Katelynn and make a run to the truck. I look down and see I’m filthy, I place Katelynn into the truck and reach into the back and grab my bag that contains a spare set of clothes. I quickly check that we’re still alone and change my jeans. I jump into the truck once I’m done and see that she has placed the seat belt on by herself.
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