“By running away?” Lisa laughed.
“Yeah, good thing we could run faster than they could. They never did find us in the dark film festival.”
“It took a while for Susie and Marlee to find us, too.”
“But they did after you texted them twelve times,” Sam said.
“You know, I can’t believe you forgot your phone at home like that. You must have been nervous yesterday.”
“Yeah,” Sam said. Something like that. “It’s nerve wracking waiting for your parents to explode.”
“Are your parents really gonna freak out?” Lisa’s voice softened.
“Probably. And if they do, I want to say happy fifth anniversary to you now.”
“Thanks, baby, but it’s not until Friday.”
“I may not be here.” Sam seriously wouldn’t put it past her parents to box her up and send her to a Swiss boarding school.
“Don’t say stuff like that.”
“I’m sorry. I guess it’s just that I’m not too hopeful about their reaction.”
“Sam?”
“Hmm?”
“Remember that no matter what happens, you’re made of tougher stuff than you think. Coach Gellar told you that.”
“If you say so.”
As if on cue, the intercom on her desk sprang to life. “Samantha Rose!” her father bellowed. “Get down here right now!”
Sam lunged for the talk button on the intercom. “Yes, sir. Be right down.” She released the button and tried to dislodge her heart that had jumped into her throat. She held the phone away from the intercom as if her father could still hear her and whispered to Lisa, “The proverbial shit is hitting the fan as we speak. I have to go. Wish me luck.”
“Good luck,” Lisa whispered back. “I love you, baby.”
“Same.”
Sam hung up with Lisa and tucked her cell phone into her jeans pocket. She tried to breathe to calm her nerves, but it didn’t help. She was on the verge of hyperventilating. She didn’t run down the stairs to the main floor, but she didn’t exactly stroll either. It was best not to keep Gerald Payton waiting. Once on the main floor, she followed the sound of her father’s pacing and stopped in the doorway of his study. As expected, her mother was sitting in one of the two tufted-back leather chairs. Sam was surprised to see that she’d been crying. The sight disarmed Sam enough that she jumped when her father spoke.
“What is the meaning of this young lady?” Her father held up the local section of the Sunday Clarksonville Courier.
Sam swallowed hard. At least Lisa wasn’t in the half-page photo. Sam, on the other hand, had been caught red handed. Rainbow flags and gay-sloganed t-shirts surrounded her in the photo. She couldn’t claim someone had photoshopped them in. She thought about saying she was only there to support a friend, but that would be selling out, and she was tired of hiding who she was.
“Samantha Rose?” Her father’s face was turning bright red. “I’m waiting for an answer.”
Before Sam could answer, her mother blurted, “Why are you associating with those kind of people?” Those kind of people? Sam was so stunned by the question she couldn’t formulate a response. Sam’s mother must have taken her silence as some kind of answer because she put shaking hands over her face and cried again.
Her father slapped the newspaper on his desk. “Sit,” he commanded and pointed to the empty leather chair. Sam did as she was told. “Are you like those people?”
He can’t say the word either. The word is gay, Daddy! Gay! she shouted in her mind. And, yes I am. See? Her life was already changing because she’d gotten out of her damned car and gone to the pride festival.
“I’m waiting.”
Sam wanted to say she was more than like those people, she was one of those people. She couldn’t figure out a way to say the words, so she simply nodded.
“This is the last thing I expected from you. What in God’s name makes you believe you’re this way?”
This way? “I just am.” Her voice sounded weak and mousy to her own ears, but at least she’d had the courage to say the words.
“This can’t be true,” Sam’s mother said. “It’s not like you to defy us like this.”
“Defy you?” Sam was confused.
“It’s those softball friends of yours,” Sam’s mother continued. “They did this to you. They brainwashed you.”
Sam burst out laughing. She couldn’t help it.
“That’s it, young lady,” her father said. “You’re grounded. No car. No friends. Rolando will drive you to school and back. You can stay for those blasted play rehearsals, but then he will drive you straight home.”
“Straight,” Sam murmured to herself with a chuckle.
“Give me your phone.” Her father held out his hand.
Sam reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. “Are you sure you want to take this?” You won’t be able to track my movements if you do. She held the phone just out of reach. Her heart was pounding. She had never ever defied her father like that. She waved her phone from side to side, taunting him.
His eyes flamed in anger at her defiance. “Phone. Now.”
“Whatever.” Sam dropped the phone into her father’s outstretched hand.
”What made you this way?” Sam’s mother asked. She dabbed at the corner of her eyes with a tissue.
“It’s not a disease, you know,” Sam said calmly. She took a breath to find her resolve. “Maybe you should ask what it’s been like for me all these years. Growing up different. Hiding who I am. Some people even say it’s genetic.”
“Well, you didn’t get it from me.”
A month before, Sam would’ve thought the statement was uttered out of sheer arrogance, but she knew better. She knew the family secret. If it truly was a genetic thing, then Sam’s mother was right. Sam couldn’t have “gotten it” from her.
“I don’t know how to make you understand this, understand me,” Sam said, her nerves jangling underneath her calm exterior. “I’m sorry if I’m a disappointment to you, but this is who I am.” An odd sort of peace was taking over her as she spoke. Maybe it was that ‘tougher stuff’ Lisa insisted she had. She decided to go for broke. “I’ve never been attracted to boys. Ever.” She paused for a moment taking in her parents who looked both confused and angry. She decided to go for broke. “Perhaps if either of you had been present during my childhood, you would have realized that.”
“Don’t speak to your mother that way,” her father roared.
Sam leaped to her feet and roared right back, “She’s not my mother, and you know it.”
There was a gasp behind her. Helene stood in the doorway, eyes wide, a hand over her mouth.
Sam held her ground and stared down her father. Denial flickered across his face for a moment, but then his shoulders slumped. He sighed in defeat. Sam remained rooted to the spot, hands balled into fists, mouth set firm.
Her father sat down hard in the leather chair that Sam had just vacated. He looked down at his hands, obviously unnerved. Sam’s mother pleaded with her eyes for him to do something, anything that would make the horrible situation go away.
The ticking of the antique grandfather clock grew as loud as the silence.
Sam broke the quiet first. ”You lied to me for eighteen years, and I lied to you about who I really am. I’m sick of the lies. I can’t live this way anymore.”
“Samantha Rose,” her father said softly. “C’mon, Kitten. You’re in shock.”
“No, I was in shock a month ago when I saw my birth certificate, but not now. I don’t know how to prove to you that, even though I’m in love with a girl, I’m still me. Just me. Same old me. Except—“ Sam looked at Helene in the doorway. “Except now I’m not sure who any of you are.” Sam bolted past Helene and ran up the stairs to her suite locking every door behind her as she went.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Mother and Daughter
MONDAYS NEVER HAD been one of Sam’s favorite days, but the Monday after the pride fes
tival was turning out to be the worst Monday in the history of Mondays. Everyone at East Valley High School had apparently seen the picture in the Clarksonville Courier or had heard about it.
The bell rang ending her fourth period ethics class, and before she could stand up, Ryan Dunham was by her side trapping her in the desk. He was standing so close to her that the hem of his varsity letterman’s jacket touched her shoulder.
“Go out with me, Samantha Rose.” Ryan put both hands on his hips. “I can be a real man for you.” A group of his friends laughed behind him.
“Move,” Sam said quietly.
“C’mon, one date.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Sam saw Mrs. Sherman conspicuously ignoring what was going on at Sam’s desk. Apparently teachers didn’t always know how to stand up to bullies either.
“Back off, Ryan. You’re being an idiot.” Using all her pent up anger, Sam put both hands on his chest and shoved him out of the way. He stumbled backward into a desk in the adjacent row.
“Ooh,” Ryan’s friends taunted.
Sam bolted out of her chair grabbing her backpack as she went. She paused long enough to send her teacher a what-the-hell glare and then headed into the crowded hallway where she met up with more jeers and taunts from other classmates.
“Look! It’s the ‘gina diner!” some creep said with a laugh as he passed by.
“What a dyke!” a junior girl goaded. “At least my boyfriend’s safe from you.”
“She hasn’t even denied it,” another junior girl added. “Can you imagine?”
All morning, she heard words like dyke, lezzie, and rug-muncher thrown at her. Even classmates that had been friendly in the past took the opportunity to knock her down. Sam didn’t let any of them see that every single one of their arrows hit its mark. Where was that tougher stuff Lisa said she had?
She steeled herself in true Payton style and blazed a lonely trail to the cafeteria. She locked eyes with Susie, her lifeline, and ignored the rest of the world.
She wasn’t sure what to make of the crowd at her lunch table, but since they looked like friends, not foes, she forged on. Abby sat at the table next to her new boyfriend, Pete. Rachel was in her usual seat. Ronnie, Alivia, and Karl sat at the table, too. Sam wasn’t expecting them to be there, but she’d take it. She threw her backpack on the floor and fell into a chair exhausted.
“How are you holding up?” Susie asked.
“People suck,” Sam said. She rested her head on her fist. She was so tired. If she had her car at school, she would have been long gone.
“Welcome to my world,” Ronnie said. “It’s just like that speaker said on Saturday. The jerks around here are ignorant, you know? Hey world, we’re here. We’re queer. Get over it already.”
“I can’t believe how mean they are,” Sam said. She looked at Abby, Pete, and Rachel. “Thanks for the support you guys, but you don’t have to hang here if you don’t want to. I’m the new pariah, if you hadn’t noticed.”
“Hell to the no, Sam,” Abby said. “We’re your friends, and we’re your teammates. We’re not abandoning you at the first sign of trouble.”
“Here, here,” Karl said and the others at the table echoed. “Tell them to get lives.”
“Thanks, guys.” Sam touched Karl’s letterman’s jacket. “At least not all jocks are jerks.”
“Thanks.” Karl’s cheeks tinged red, and Alivia smiled at him.
“You know,” Abby continued, “I always wondered why you didn’t have a boyfriend. I thought maybe the guys around here were intimidated by your family name.”
“That’s probably true, too,” Sam said with a chuckle.
“And Lisa,” Abby continued, “is she your...”
“Yes.” Sam nodded.
“Ah, so many things make sense now.”
Sam felt her cheeks get warm. “God, what a nightmare this is. I didn’t want to come out of the closet in such a grand fashion.” She closed her eyes for a moment wishing she could be somewhere else.
“You know, Sam,” Abby said, “I think people are reacting this way because you were so far above the rest of us.”
“I never—”
“I know, but let me finish. Your parents are like the king and queen of the North Country.”
“Payton Valley, you mean?” Sam couldn’t help her sarcastic tone, even though she knew Abby was just trying to help.
Abby nodded. “Yeah, something like that. But right or wrong, you’ve been untouchable, better than everybody else, above reproach.”
Sam frowned.
“In their eyes, I mean,” Abby was quick to add. “We know you’re cool, right guys?”
Heads around the table nodded.
“And now we find out you’re as human as the rest of us mere mortals.” Abby grinned letting Sam know she was on her side.
“What she means is,” Ronnie said, “the mighty have fallen, and these ignorant assholes see you as an equal or, let’s be honest, less than equal.”
“I’ve never—”
Susie’s hand on her arm silenced her. “We know, gringa. You’re vulnerable right now. They’re going in for the kill. All of us at this table agree that you’re an awesome person. We’re all here to help you. We’re here for each other, okay?”
“Has anyone bothered you today?” Sam asked Susie, hoping she hadn’t taken heat by being her friend.
“Not too much. I’m okay. Don’t worry about me.” Susie squeezed Sam’s arm gently and then pulled her cell phone out of her pocket. “Now in about three minutes, this phone is going to ring, and it’s going to be for you.”
“Lisa?” Sam’s eyes grew wide.
Susie nodded. “She has lunch now, too.”
“You’re the best.”
“I know,” Susie said. “I texted Marlee and Lisa this morning after you told me what happened with your parents.”
Except nobody knows all the sordid details, Sam thought. “Thanks, Sus.”
“Hey, what’re friends for? Right, guys?”
“Absolutely,” Alivia said. “We’re here for you Samantha Rose.”
“I don’t think Samantha Rose exists anymore, so call me Sam from now on, okay?”
“Okay.”
Rachel cleared her throat and said, “How about we declare an official moratorium on the name Samantha Rose, and only those that are true friends get to call you Sam?”
“I’m all for it. Thanks, guys.” Sam blinked back tears. She hadn’t been expecting such unconditional support.
“Since there’s absolutely no privacy at this school,” Susie held up her car keys, “you’re going to go sit in my car and talk to your girlfriend until the bell rings to end lunch. Okay?”
“Thanks, Sus.” Sam stood up. “Thanks everybody.” She blew out a sigh, shut her ears, and headed toward the side door of the cafeteria.
SAM WAITED UNTIL her parents went to bed and then snuck down the stairs to Helene’s apartment. This time Helene was home. She knocked lightly on the door, almost hoping Helene wouldn’t answer. The door opened within seconds.
“I was hoping you’d come by.” Helene opened the door wide enough for Sam to enter.
“Sorry it took me a whole day. Well, a whole month, actually.”
Helene closed the door behind them and led the way to the kitchen. She gestured for Sam to sit at the table. “Canada Dry or tea?” Her own freshly made cup of tea sat steeping on the counter.
“Tea please.”
“The usual?”
Sam nodded and then, without warning, started to cry. A month’s worth of torment flooded out of her.
A familiar arm went around her shoulders. “Shh, shh,” Helene pulled her close.
Sam let herself be comforted until she ran out of tears. “Sorry.”
Helene brushed the hair away from Sam’s face. “I have so much to tell you.”
“Not yet, okay? I don’t think I’m quite ready.”
“Me neither.” Helene laughed which made Sam smile. �
��Let me get your tea.” Helene stood up and pulled out a box of Sleepytime tea. “Five lumps?”
Sam nodded.
“We haven’t done this in a while.”
“We’ve both been busy.” And now you’re leaving me.
Helene poured the hot water from the tea kettle into a cup and put a tea bag in. She set it down in front of Sam and pushed the box of sugar cubes and a spoon toward her. Sam shook out five cubes and dunked them in her cup. She couldn’t help thinking it might be the last time she and Helene shared their stolen nighttime ritual.
“How was school today?”
“Pfft.” Sam wiped at her eyes, willing herself not to cry again. “They’re a bunch of jerks.”
“Rough, huh?”
Sam nodded.
“That’s not how I wanted things to go for you.”
“Helene, will I ever see you again?” Sam looked at her tea cup not wanting to make eye contact.
“Yes. Of course you will, but you won’t be able to cross the border by yourself until you’re eighteen.”
“Unless I’m accompanied by a parent.” Sam looked up shyly.
Helene’s smile softened. “When did you find out?”
“A month ago. When you were in the hospital. I was looking for something in that duffel bag you call a purse.”
“And you found your birth certificate. That‘s why you fainted.”
Sam nodded.
“Do your friends know?”
Sam shook her head. “I couldn’t bring myself to tell them. I was in shock. I still am.” Sam sipped her tea as silence overtook the room. She set her cup down gently and asked, “Are you really my mother?”
Helene nodded.
Sam swallowed against the growing lump in her throat. Her insides quivered. She didn’t want to ask the question but had to. “How?” She fixed her gaze on the teacup.
Helene stood up and faced the sink, her back to Sam. “Your parents should be telling you this.”
“Helene, c’mon. For eighteen years you made me think you were simply my kind and loving nanny, and now I find out you’re my mother, and you can’t tell me how?”
Helene’s head drooped. She too bore a heavy burden. She turned around slowly and leaned back against the sink. “Your parents found me in Montréal.”
Stealing Second: Sam's Story: Book 4 in the Clarksonville Series Page 22