by Linda Broday
He closed his eyes in the silence and let his mind drift to another who liked to paint. The Widow Harper, the woman his father had given him to, had also loved to paint landscapes. She loved life and colored her lonely world with beauty and kindness. He missed her. Everyone he developed a fondness for had vanished from his life.
Marley returned with a plate of eggs and toast. “This will be light on your stomach.”
“Thank you.” He tried to give her a smile, and he hoped she recognized the attempt at least. “Anything is welcome. I’m sorry if I’ve taken you from something else. I’m sure you have many things you’d rather do than sit by such a sorry-looking sight as I am.”
She lifted the book on the chair and sat down. “I’m not complaining, and neither is anyone else. Tell me about this friend of yours, Mose. What was your life like with him?”
While he ate, he told her about Mose and just how much the man’s friendship had meant to him. He found Marley easy to talk to. She asked a few questions, and he ended up saying far more than he’d intended.
Before he knew it, he’d practically cleaned his plate of the delicious food. Marley opened her book and scribbled something on a page. A thoughtful pucker appeared on her forehead as she wrote. He liked her brown eyes. Brown reminded him of the soil, necessary for growing things—whether crops or nurturing a soul. There was something wholesome and honest about the color.
“I’m curious about that book. What are you doing?”
“Writing a story for Matthew… I’m sorry, Matt.” She flashed him a smile. “He does love my feeble attempts.”
“How many have you written?” He filled his mouth with more eggs and toast.
“I think there’s a dozen in this book. I have two more that are full. Most are very short and can be read in their entirety at bedtime. Nothing will probably come of them, but I enjoy letting my imagination take hold and run.” She tapped the pencil against her cheek. “Writing completes something inside me as nothing else does. I know this sounds silly.”
“Absolutely not. You appear to be a very creative person, and you should take it seriously.” And beautiful to boot, the best he could tell. He’d gotten a good look at her when she’d helped raise him to a sitting position. The ends of her dark hair had tickled his cheek, and he’d fought the urge to touch a strand.
But what drew him to her most was her kind heart.
“I do try, believe me. But what use is it? What will I ever do with it other than read to Matt? Lord knows, no one else probably will.”
“You should try to publish them.”
“How? I don’t know the first thing about that.” She released a sigh and shut the book.
“Just don’t give up on your dream.” Roan laid down his fork and wiped his mouth. “I’ve been meaning to apologize.”
“What for?”
“I’m sorry I stole your bed, Miss Marley. If you can direct me to another, I’ll gladly give it back.”
Marley laughed. “Nope. It’s yours for as long as you need it. I’m sleeping fine on the sofa. Would you like to listen to some music? I have a phonograph I can bring in here.”
“Anything to stay awake.” He chuckled. “Fair warning, I’ll probably fall asleep in the middle of a record.”
“I’ll take my chances.”
She took his tray and disappeared through the door. He cursed his poor vision that he couldn’t see her curves. Something told him that she cut quite a figure. One thing he already knew by the sound—she had a no-nonsense stride.
And he couldn’t even admire it or her figure. Hell!
But he had seen her brown eyes when she’d leaned close, and they were real pretty.
* * *
The next morning, Marley commandeered Hardy Gage and Judd Hanson into helping Roan outside into the sunshine. She gathered a pan of warm water, a towel, and soap to wash his hair. He’d already agreed and seemed to look forward to it. But he rested his head against the back of the chair as though it was too heavy to hold up.
Matthew came running. “What’cha doing, Mr. Penny?”
“Your Mama Rose is going to wash my hair, little man.”
“Can I watch?”
“I reckon so, but it’s going to be boring,” Marley warned.
“Hey, Matthew, want to come with me an’ Judd?” Hardy asked. “Molly had her kittens.”
Judd picked up the cajoling. “They’re awful cute I hear. But if you don’t want to—”
“I do! I do!” The boy jumped up and down, clasping his hands together.
Marley breathed a sigh of relief. She wanted a few minutes alone with Roan. She wasn’t even sure what to say, but she’d feel better not having little ears listening to each word.
“Are you sure you don’t mind doing this?” Roan opened his eyes. Even though it wasn’t very wide, given that they were still swollen, she saw a small improvement. “This sun is exactly what I needed, but I may fall out of this chair. It’s sure making me awful sleepy.”
“I’ll catch you.” Marley bit her lip. That sounded way too forward. “I mean, I won’t let you hurt yourself.”
“I’ll hold you to that.” Roan chuckled. “Not that anyone would notice new bruises.”
“Lean back into the warm water.” The pan, resting on a high table, was the right height and allowed Marley to use both hands. “I’ll try to be gentle, but the dried blood may need to soak a bit.”
“I hate for you to have to tackle this job, but I’m as weak as a newborn babe. It tires me to move any part of my body.”
“That’s why you have to rest more before you ride out, and besides, I don’t mind one bit. When I finish here, I’ll shave you.”
Roan cut his eyes to her. “Shave me? Have you done that before?”
“Often ranch hands get hurt and can’t groom themselves for whatever reason. I’ve gotten very skillful at shaving men. There’s no need to be nervous.”
“If you say so, Miss Marley. It will feel good to get this stubble off.”
“Just close your eyes and think about a place where your soul can be at peace.” She reached for the soap and lathered it to a thick foam on his wet hair, then very gently began to wash out the matted blood.
His eyes closed, Roan let a rumble of appreciation escape. “This is heaven right here. You have a most gentle touch, Miss Marley.”
“Thank you, but I’m plain Marley. Like my father, I’ve never been big on formality. We’re ordinary people here.”
“I noticed that by the way you treat your ranch hands like family.”
Marley chuckled, massaging his scalp. “That’s because they are. They helped raise me and now these other children.”
She kept him entertained with tales of her parents and the children they’d taken in. He seemed truly interested, as though the McClain family was a rarity. Maybe they were where he came from. She washed his dark strands until they gleamed, then collected her shaving items.
Roan sat up and touched his hair. “I can’t thank you enough.”
“I’m glad I could do it.” Finding him on that lonely, cold morning had changed her life in a lot of ways. She loved his touch and how his voice changed when he spoke passionately about certain topics. He’d done things she’d only read about. He was smart and had a great sense of humor.
Roan Penny was the first man who’d ever truly interested her. And now he was set to leave. She probably wouldn’t see him again.
Somehow, she found the thought unbearable. Roan had brought life into her monotonous days. She couldn’t go back to merely existing.
* * *
Roan soaked up the sun’s warmth and leaned his head back, his eyes closed. Marley wrapped a warm towel around his face, leaving his eyes and mouth open, readying to shave him.
She rested a hand on his shoulder. Her touch gave him such a calm feeling. �
��I’m going to be very careful and avoid the cut around your throat. If I cause you pain, let me know right away.”
“You can be sure of that. But it’s such a shallow cut it doesn’t bother me much.”
While the moist heat softened the stubble, she told him about a new story she’d written about a boy and his pet horse. He could listen to her talk all day. Her voice had the same musical quality he’d noticed at the outset, and as she spoke, passion filled her words.
“You have a real gift, Marley. You have such a vivid imagination.”
“Thanks, but I just write what’s in my heart. I don’t know any other way. I think we’re ready to proceed.” She removed the towel and lathered him up, then carefully put the razor to his jaw.
He closed his eyes and enjoyed the pampering. His thoughts wandered to this ranch, the McClain family, and to Marley. They’d shown him there were still kind people in the world.
The razor strokes were smooth, never hard or jerky. Marley’s skill amazed him. Was there anything she couldn’t do? He lay back, soaking up the sounds of the windmill, horses nickering in the corral, and the light scrape of the razor against his jaw. Except for Marley’s closeness, he could have dozed off.
But Marley made sleep impossible. The faint scent of something flowery encircled his head. He relaxed and enjoyed her presence, wishing he could tell her how much sharing these days meant to him.
Still, what use would it be to voice feelings that couldn’t go anywhere?
His thoughts drifted until he felt her lean over him, felt a strand of hair brush his shoulder. He opened his eyes to find himself staring into her pretty brown gaze just inches away. For a second, he barely breathed, for fear it was a dream and she’d vanish.
Her close proximity did strange things to his heart.
Dark curls framed her face, and her eyes glistened like diamonds shimmering in a stream. Air got trapped in his lungs, and the wanting was so powerful, it sent throbbing pain through him.
Like a man wandering too long alone, he reached to capture a strand of hair between his thumb and forefinger. The texture was like satin, and he couldn’t move, couldn’t think, couldn’t speak. Her soft breath whispered against his newly shaved cheek, and unexpected hunger rose.
Awareness sizzled between them. He became acutely conscious of the length of her eyelashes, her heartbeat, the pulse in the hollow of her elegant neck. He’d long searched for a woman like Marley, never once thinking she existed.
Her mouth was so close. Just a slight move forward…
But to what end? He wouldn’t tease her, make her think they could have more when, in truth, they could have no future at all.
Marley Rose McClain was everything a man like him could never have, and to even wish for a life with her was a big mistake that could only lead to bitter disappointment. Best to remember his place and that he had nothing to offer—not to her or to any woman.
But maybe, for just a moment, he could pretend.
“You have the silkiest hair I’ve ever felt.” His voice was low and full of yearning. He released the strand and brushed a finger lightly across her cheek. “I’m afraid you got a poor bargain when you patched up my rotten hide.”
“Let me be the judge of that. There is nothing wrong with your hide.”
Her soft statement wound around his heart like a stubborn trumpet vine.
She adjusted her angle, cleared her throat, and moved back a fraction. Her attention once again on his jaw, she applied the razor’s edge to his stubble. “I’m glad I found you,” she murmured.
“Me too.” Roan glanced away, feeling the need to apologize. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. That was no way to repay your kindness.”
“Good heavens, Roan. You didn’t do anything wrong. I like being with you. Over the time we’ve spent together, I like to think we’ve become true friends.” She lifted the razor and wiped it with the towel.
Friends. Well, that put him in his place. He should thank her for reminding him. He would, if he didn’t think it would make things awkward. She’d been so kind to him—he was honored to have her friendship.
“You’re easy to be around, Marley, and I’ve enjoyed being with you more than you know.” He’d remember this time for the rest of his life. When he sat around a lonely campfire, he’d recall Marley McClain and how tempted he’d been to kiss her.
A minute later, she wiped away the remaining shaving cream and handed him a mirror. “What do you think?”
“You’ve worked a miracle. I feel like a new man and, except for the bruises and black eyes, I look almost human.”
She stood back with a smile. “I think you’re very handsome.”
That was one word he’d rarely heard spoken about him. That she thought him pleasing to the eye made his heart flutter, and he worked to wipe a foolish smile from his face.
In the comfortable silence, he found peace that had been missing from his existence.
Roan thought about that as he sat with her in the sun, listening to the lazy windmill, imagining a life here for real—the place of belonging he’d searched for. He watched Marley scribbling in her storybook, a grin curving her lips. She was an amazing woman with so much to give the world.
He had nothing to offer except bad luck—and grief to Mose’s killers.
But if one day he had the opportunity again to ride near the Aces ’n’ Eights, he would stop in a heartbeat. For sure, the lovely Marley McClain would fill his dreams for a long time, her gentle touch lingering in his heart.
Seven
Two days later, the chilly morning air held a bite to it as Roan pulled himself into the saddle of his borrowed horse. His body screamed with pain, and it was all he could do to stifle a groan. Even in the saddle, he tried to pretend every muscle wasn’t quivering like a horse ridden too hard. Sweat popped out on his forehead from the exertion.
While he took control of his rebellious body, he also took a last look around the large compound. His gaze swept to the bunkhouse, corral, barn, and the two dwellings. Another building appeared to be a small smithy. He thought it odd that the kitchen of the main house faced the compound. That was the entrance everyone used rather than the front of the house. That said they were casual people.
It was pretty here. And peaceful. Trees, tall and thick, grew on each side of the gate.
Movement caught his attention as Marley strode from the headquarters. She smiled up at Roan, gripping her shawl tighter around her. “Will you come back, Mr. Penny?”
Roan stared at the dark hair that curled possessively around her shoulders, remembering how silky it had felt when he’d touched it. She was beautiful, possibly the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, and had kind ways. Whoever married her and lived on the Aces ’n’ Eights would be a lucky, lucky man.
“Would you care if I didn’t, Marley Rose McClain?” He found himself unable to move from her dark gaze.
Her face turned somber. “A great deal. It would pain me if you didn’t—if I never knew what happened to you.”
Proof that someone cared about him shattered his inner calm. He hadn’t expected to find that anywhere, not truly. But especially not with this woman.
“I’m not sure of my plans. I guess it depends on what happens when I get to Mose’s.” He glanced down at his clothes. Everything he had on—from his wool shirt and trousers to the thick jacket and hat—was borrowed. “Appreciate the clothes.”
“You’re welcome. Nothing much was left of those you came with.” She rested a hand on Matthew’s shoulder. The sleepy-eyed boy had stolen from the house to say his farewells.
“Bye, Matt,” Roan said. “You take care now and don’t chase after too many girls.”
“I won’t, Mr. Penny.” Matthew giggled, then asked, “Are you still blind in your eye?”
“A little, but it’s getting better.” Roan could se
e Marley a whole lot clearer. He wished he knew how to tell her what her kindness to him had meant. Maybe the letter he’d left for her would suffice.
Jessie McClain handed her husband a heavy burlap sack. “Here’s some food, honey. Come home safe.”
Roan watched Duel’s lazy smile and saw the couple’s gazes lock. How would it be to have a wife to love him like that?
“I intend to, darlin’.” Duel pulled Jessie close and kissed her.
Roan watched Jessie curl her arm around her husband’s neck, then he quickly turned away to give them privacy. Though he’d been young when his mother died, he had no memories of his father showing her a speck of consideration, much less love. Duel and Jessie’s passionate kiss and their little furtive touches only sharpened the contrast to the stark bleakness of Roan’s life. Mose had rarely spoken of life with his wife, but the few times he had, reverence had filled his voice. This must be what the lonely man had tried to explain to Roan.
This sort of love was the farthest thing possible from the brothels where Roan had sometimes gone when the long, lonely nights clawed at him. He’d only done it a handful of times, repulsed by the cheap perfume and fake laughter. Afterward, he’d gotten drunk on rotgut whiskey, trying to forget the sadness that washed over him.
“I’ll be back before you miss me,” Duel told Jessie.
Jessie’s satisfied sigh told Roan he could safely look again.
“Now get on up there, honey,” Jessie said. “The quicker you leave, the quicker you can ride back.” She turned to Roan and reached up to shake his hand. “Mr. Penny, it was a pleasure. I hope you’ll ride back with my husband. You’re welcome here.”
“Thank you, ma’am. And also for patching me up,” Roan answered.
“You should still be in bed, but I reckon you know what you’re able to do.”
“Yes, ma’am. I’ll be fine.”
“Keep a candle burning in the window, Jess.” Duel patted his wife’s bottom and mounted up.