by Linda Broday
“Whatever you feel comfortable doing.” He wasn’t going anywhere.
“First of all, I’m sure you gathered that Will Gentry is my father. A woman named Maria Escobar was my mother. Duel told me earlier that when I was just a baby, Gentry wagered me in”—her voice broke on a keening sound and the whispered words—“in a poker game. Duel won me.” She clapped her hand over her mouth. “He brought me back here and raised me.” Her haunted eyes met his. “I don’t know how Jessie fits into all this, but she wasn’t yet married to my…Duel when this happened.”
Shock swept over Roan. Marley’s sense of security, her calm, orderly world had shattered, and it stood to reason she’d question her identity and relationship with everyone. “I’m so sorry. If I could take your pain, I would.” He’d move heaven and earth to put things back the way they were.
“God help me! I don’t know who I am,” she cried. “Not even my name. Is it McClain—or Gentry? Who am I? I don’t want to be Gentry’s daughter.”
“You don’t have to be. Since I know you’ll never use Gentry’s name, keep going by McClain.” Roan turned her to face him. “You’re still Duel McClain’s daughter, just like before. This changes nothing. He rescued you from a very bad man and gave you a good life, protected you from harm. I’ve seen how much he loves you. This has devastated him.”
“I still love him. You know? I felt his pain when he told me all this. I’ve never seen my…him…break down like that before. Not ever. It ripped his heart open that he had to confess.” Tears rolled down her cheeks.
Roan fished a wrinkled handkerchief from his pocket and dried her eyes. If only he could make this better, but he knew it wasn’t in his power. Marley had to find her own way to peace.
“I’m so angry and hurt at him and Jessie. They should’ve told me the truth as soon as I got old enough to understand. I don’t think they’d have ever told me if Gentry had stayed away.”
“It’s okay to be mad as long as you don’t let it fester into a sore.” Roan knew how fast anger could turn into hate. That was all he’d felt for Blackie Culpepper—not pity and surely not sympathy. Just hate. He didn’t want Marley to ruin her relationship with Duel by carrying nothing but anger inside. Duel was too fine a man to know only that from his daughter.
“Did I mean so little to my mother that she’d let this happen? Duel and Jessie said she came here once but left me behind, claiming she wasn’t strong enough to protect me from Gentry. And she was right, for Gentry killed her.” Marley shuddered. “I was sold, Roan. Duel got me for the price of a bet. Oh God!” She covered her mouth with her hand. “I was worth so little? And now Gentry seems hell-bound to do it again!” Marley put her hands over her mouth.
“No. Stop.” He took her hands. “Your mother showed you true love. I’m sure it broke her heart in a million pieces to leave you with Duel and Jessie, but she had to have known that was the only way to keep you safe. And I’m sure Duel would’ve paid any price at that poker table. A person’s worth is not measured in money; it’s measured by the love you see in someone’s eyes. In the knowing that they’d risk their own life to save you. That’s Duel McClain all over.”
Silent tears bubbled in her dark eyes. “Thank you.”
Roan pulled her up. “You’re very special to me.” He pressed his lips to hers and gave her a gentle kiss.
She gripped his shirt and clung to him. When the kiss ended, she released a long sigh and laid her head on his chest.
“Do you know what you mean to me, Marley?”
Tear droplets clung to her the tips of her lashes when she raised her gaze. “No.”
“I love you.” Roan’s voice was hoarse.
“You really do?” A quivery smile curved her mouth.
“I realized it tonight when I was searching for you. I knew I didn’t want to live without you.” He tightened his hold around her. “I’m sorry I wouldn’t let you say the words in San Saba. Do you still feel the same way?”
“I love you, Roan Penny. Forever and always.” She slid her arms around his neck. Beginning with his eyes, she kissed her way down his face to his lips.
Roan let her do whatever she wished. Each kiss, each caress helped her heal, find hope again, renewed her spirit. The surety that Marley would one day be his wife released the lock from around his heart, and he let her in.
“Stay with me tonight. Hold me in your arms,” she said against his mouth. “Be the pirate who’s come to whisk me away to safety.”
“I’ll be whatever, whoever you need me to be.” He kissed behind her ear. “But don’t make me a villain. I’m one of the good guys.”
“That you are. I’m glad you love me and could say the words that came so hard.”
“Blame it on the way I grew up. I learned that pain wasn’t nearly so sharp if I held everything inside.” His voice shook. “It was when I dared to let some out that the misery and hurt would rise up to strangle me. Matt’s already learned that, you know. He’s going to require a lot of love and tenderness to grow up into a strong man.”
“You know him so well.”
“We’re two of a kind.”
Marley kissed the hollow of his throat and stared up at him. “Would you marry me, Roan Penny? For real this time. I’ve had enough pretense.”
Twenty-three
Roan’s silence worried her.
Marley glanced up into his gray eyes. “Isn’t that what you want? What we both decided?”
“I don’t think rushing into marriage is wise at the moment.” His voice was gentle. “You’re reacting out of hurt and anger, not because you want to make a lifetime commitment to me.” He cupped the side of her face, and she leaned into his hand. God, she loved his touch on her skin. “Besides, where will we live? I don’t know what you want, but I see us on our own land. The money I won will help, but it’s not enough. My Texas Star, we have plans to make.”
She released a breath. “You’re right. We need to plan. Hold me, Roan.”
He planted a kiss in her hair. “You’ll have to pry my arms loose.”
“That’s why I love you.” She snuggled into his warmth.
* * *
Light filtered through the curtains of Marley’s small house. She stirred in Roan’s arms. They’d spent the night on the sofa, her head on his shoulder, the quilt keeping them warm. She felt drugged and weary. Too much had happened to take in, and she had no idea where this new road would lead her.
Roan’s eyes met hers. “Good morning, sleeping beauty. I couldn’t find my pirate ship.”
“I’m glad you helped me make it through the night.” She got up to stand at the window. The ranch looked the same as it always had, but she knew it could never be the same again. Something inside her had changed. Duel came from his house and stared in her direction, although she knew he couldn’t see her. “Besides, sleeping beauty lived in a castle,” she murmured.
“So she did.” Roan came up from behind and put his arms around her. He kissed the back of her neck.
“He’s standing out there, looking so sad and alone.” She swallowed hard. “What am I supposed to do now? I don’t feel like Marley McClain. I don’t know me.”
“Duel is still the same father you’ve always loved. He’s hurting real bad too, Marley. I think you need to go talk to him. You both have things to say.”
“Maybe.”
“Nothing can be settled without hashing it out. Go to him, Marley,” Roan urged.
She turned. “About last night. I shouldn’t have asked you to marry me.” She wrinkled her nose. “Just chalk it up to distress and nerves.”
He tucked a tendril of hair behind her ear, studying her face. “It’s already forgotten.”
“We have plenty of time, and when we marry, it’ll be for the right reason.”
“When did you get so smart?” He released her. “Go talk to Duel.”
<
br /> “I should. And Mama…Jessie needs help with breakfast.”
Roan walked with her to the door and opened it. “Don’t close your mind or your heart.”
She nodded and took a deep breath, then left the house. Duel watched her approach, and the slump of his shoulders and sadness in his amber eyes was painful to see.
“How are you, Marley?” he asked in his deep voice. He started to reach for her but instead dropped his arms to his sides. What she wouldn’t give to go back to their easy way with each other.
“In truth, I don’t know how I am. I have so many feelings racing through me. I don’t know who I am anymore. I grew up always knowing and taking comfort in the fact that I was a McClain. Even on the scariest, darkest night I found security belonging here. Now…”
“You’re still Marley McClain, if you want to be. I legally adopted you. There’s nothing wrong with the name.”
“I know.” Her gaze scanned the rolling pastures. Suddenly, it hit her. Aces ’n’ Eights. Duel had named the ranch for the hand he’d won her with. The dead man’s hand. Her lips quivered, and she raised her hand to still them. When she could speak, she said, “I always thought the name of this ranch was odd. Was it to remind yourself of the fact that I wasn’t your daughter?”
Duel released a cry that sounded like a wounded animal. “I gave it this name to celebrate the day you came into my heart. To remind myself that I wasn’t alone anymore, that I had a daughter whom I loved with every fiber of my being.” He blinked hard and raised his head. “I won’t apologize for that. Not for one second.”
As though unable to bear the pain that must be on her face, he swung his gaze toward the distance.
Whether he was her father or not, she loved this man with all her heart and soul. She remembered a night—she must’ve been about nine or ten—when she’d had a high fever. Her throat had been so swollen it wouldn’t allow more than a drop of anything through. Duel had kept warm rags smeared with a salve around her throat even though he’d had an important trip to make the next day.
Another time he’d ridden ten miles in the dead of night in the pouring rain to get the doctor. He’d come down with a horrible fever from the ordeal. Time after time, Duel had sacrificed his own well-being for her. He must’ve dreaded this moment since the day he’d brought her home, afraid to keep the secret but afraid to tell.
He turned back to her, in control of his feelings again. “I’m sorry I kept the truth from you. I just wanted you to never doubt that you belonged here. This is your home,” he rasped. “Everything Jessie and I did was for you, to give you the best life we could. There was never a moment that I didn’t love you.”
Tears welled in her eyes. “Can I still be your daughter, Papa? If you’ll have me?”
With a low cry, he put his arms around her. “Always. Always.”
Peace surrounded her, the quiet after a horrible storm. Marley still had things to work through, but she had strength now for the task. She clutched his work shirt, soaking up the smell of shaving cream and coffee. “I love you, Papa. Even last night when I felt so betrayed and angry, I couldn’t bring myself to hate you.”
“I was so afraid that you’d leave, and I couldn’t bear to think of that.” He cleared his throat. “But Jessie told me to keep my faith in you. She said you’re still the girl we raised.”
At mention of her mama, Marley jerked back. “Oh my goodness, I forgot about breakfast.”
Duel chuckled low in his throat. “It’ll keep. But my cows won’t. I’ve got to get moving. See you later, Two Bit.”
The pet name he’d called her when she was a child left a thickness in her chest. They shared much more than a last name. He was her father in every sense of the word. A real father made sacrifices and held his children close—he didn’t wager his child in a game of chance.
She paused with her hand on the door, watching Duel head out to meet his day. And stepping from the bunkhouse, falling in step, Roan matched Duel stride for stride.
The two men represented her whole world. Both were tough and fearless, and she admired and loved them.
Jessie glanced up when Marley entered the kitchen. Her mama’s gaze searched her eyes. “Are you all right, honey?”
“I just had a private talk with Papa. I’m not angry at him or you anymore. The shock of finding out how I came to be here knocked me flat. I want to talk to you about it—I want to hear how you came into the picture and when—but not now. Let’s get the children fed and off to school.”
“Sure, honey. I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.” Jessie turned, cracking eggs into the cast-iron skillet. “I already have the biscuits on, and the bacon’s ready.”
Surprise swept through Marley. “You must’ve been up for a while.”
“We never went to bed. We sat up all night talking. Your father ate an hour ago.”
“Then I’ll go upstairs and help the little ones into their clothes.” But instead of moving in that direction, she went to hug Jessie and kiss her cheek. “I love you, Mama.”
* * *
Change had come to the Aces ’n’ Eights. Duel seemed certain that Will Gentry was lurking about, ready to inflict harm, so until the man was caught, Hardy would deliver the children to school in the buckboard. Duel had also expressed concerns about Marley leaving the ranch and said she’d have an armed escort whenever she did.
That suited Marley. The thought of running into Gentry again chilled her blood, and the children had also picked up on her fears. Matt had crawled into her lap that morning and snuggled against her.
“I’m scared, Mama Rose,” he’d said. “The bad man will get me.”
She’d hugged him and told him that Papa Duel and all the men would keep them safe, and he didn’t have to worry. All while she’d calmed his fears, her thoughts were on herself. She was the one Gentry wanted, and a knot sat in her stomach.
True, she’d been in shock last night, but she’d heard his diabolical vow to auction her off to the highest bidder.
Memories of the random gunshots in San Saba crept across her mind. If he’d wanted to make money off her, why would he want to kill her? That must’ve been someone else. But who?
After the children were off to school and the housework done, Marley sat with Jessie in the parlor. They laid the babies on a quilt on the floor where they could watch them.
Jessie was the first to speak. “I know you have a lot of questions, and I hope my answers will ease your mind.” She played with her apron, bunching the fabric, then smoothing it. “I haven’t done right by you, Marley, and I know it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Bringing all these kids here was a mistake, and I see that now. Each time we added to our brood, it pushed you farther back. Neither your father nor I have given you the attention you need in quite a while.” Jessie gave a short laugh. “And the extra work has mostly landed on your shoulders. You don’t have a minute to yourself. I’m so sorry, honey.”
“I’ve never minded helping, Mama.”
“I minded asking.” Jessie rose and stared through the window as though she were looking back in time. “I know you’re curious about when I entered the picture. It was that first night that Duel had you. He’d decided to bring you back here and get his sister Vicky to help raise you. This was before she moved away. He had made camp and was trying to remember everything a kind woman in town had told him about babies. She’d given him a few bottles and cloths for diapers, and even let him have a goat to take on the trip to keep you in milk.”
Marley laughed. “So that’s where Cheeba came from.”
“That goat dearly tried your father’s patience. She butted him every time he bent over. That’s the scene I stumbled across.” Jessie turned, and Marley could see tears gathering in her eyes. “I was running from the law for killing my husband. He’d pressed a hot brand to my shoulder, claimin
g me as his property.”
Marley gasped. No wonder Jessie had never let Marley see her in a state of undress. “That’s horrible. I don’t blame you for killing him! You had to.”
“The law didn’t see it that way.” Jessie sat down next to Marley and took her hand. “Duel didn’t know any of that at the time. He just saw a desperate woman wearing a blood-soaked dress. I’m sure I was quite a sight, but he was so gentle, and he didn’t pry. I couldn’t tell him more than my first name, I was so scared of being caught and hanged. I lay down with you that night and didn’t let you go. You brought me comfort.”
“I’m glad.” Marley wanted to cry for this kind and generous woman, but she held back the tears. Something told her there was more.
“The next morning, Duel made a bargain with me—if I helped him get you to his home, he’d take me anywhere I wanted to go.” A smile lit Jessie’s eyes. “He didn’t know that there was no place else I wanted to be. That’s how I met your father and found a true knight wearing a deadly Colt in his holster.”
That story touched Marley deeply. “I’m sure he was such a handsome man. He still is.”
“No other man can hold a candle to him. But I have more, and this part is the hardest to tell.” Jessie wiped her eyes. “My first husband, Jeremiah Foltry, was a mean, heartless bastard. Looking back, I think he must have lost his mind. He accused me of being with other men and became obsessed with me getting pregnant by one of them. Jeremiah ranted that he wasn’t going to raise another man’s child. It got worse and worse.
“I tried to escape his madness, but he caught me and chained me in the barn. He used me every night, and I did conceive. One night he flew into a rage and said even if it was his, I wasn’t fit to raise it.
“He grabbed a stick and rammed it into me. The pain made me pass out. There was so much blood. The doctor came, after, and said I’d never be able have children. That I was too badly…damaged.” Jessie’s voice broke.