“Has your wound festered?” she asked, attempting to distract him. “I will tell Elva you need more salve.”
He brushed his lips across hers, making every vat and mordant vanish leaving only his smell of leather, sea and the hint of mead on his breath filling her senses. His tongue wet her lips, sending shivers down through her fingertips.
His kiss became hungrier, more intense as she opened for him. Their tongues stroked each other’s. Kaireen’s hands grasped his hair.
Bram smiled against her lips. Then he pulled away from her. Their gasping breaths appeared like wisps of white smoke between them.
Pretending as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened, she brushed her grey skirts. She hoped her shaking legs would not give away how he made her want to rip his clothes and feel his skin beneath her fingers.
She felt Bram’s stare. He leaned against the wall, the grin bigger than before.
“What?” She placed her hands on her hips.
“Your kiss speaks more to me than your words.” He winked at her gasp.
“Sir, you take far too many liberties.” Rebellious to her mind, her heart thumped inside her chest, echoing through her body.
He tilted his head to the side. Oh lord, did he hear it too?
“Mmm.” The deep vibration of his voice sent wetness to her loins. “I have taken too many liberties with you.”
She stared at him opened mouthed.
He chuckled, “I do not know what possessed me to think I could wait a fortnight to be with you.”
“I think it’s best that we cease kissing or anything else. I am not a wanton and since I will not be married to you, I won’t be seduced by your lips or body any longer.” Wanting to kiss him had lodged deep inside her and was spreading like a sickness. Time she lanced it out. She climbed the stairs. It would be agonizing, but it was better now than later.
She did not hear Bram’s footsteps behind her.
“Well?” She spun around and saw Bram was where she had left him.
“Here I stand, waiting for you to admit the truth as your heart feels it.” He looked at her.
“Admit what? That you are an arrogant fool?”
“Tell me you have missed me too.” His tone grew serious. “Say the words, or we will stay here all night.”
“Did you not hear what I said?”
“I heard a lie that you want to be truth.” He leaned against the wall studying her. “Why is it so hard for you just to admit you have a fondness for me, no matter how small?”
She wiped her hands on her wool dress. Sweat trickled down her back. Normally, she would let him stay there all night. However, the likelihood of Rhiannon returning increased with each moment.
She could not risk further punishment for herself or the other servants. Already she fantasized about holding Rhiannon’s head in a vat of woad until her eyelashes and teeth turned blue. If Rhiannon found him here and vented her anger on them all, Kaireen may not be able to smother her own fiery temper any longer.
No doubt she would have to give her penance for those thoughts with Friar Connell. She clenched her fist and straightened her back. “I may have missed you like a cat misses a flea.” She snapped. The admittance of her heart loving him angered her. Why should she be the one to fall in love? Why could she not stop before she fell too far?
The muscle in his square jaw twitched.
She caught his intent as it crossed his face and she backed away. “No, nothing more.”
In two strides he barreled down on her. His arms locked her in place. “Admit you long for me as I do for you.” His breath nuzzled her neck.
She lost her balance, but clutched his arms. “I told you, we will have no wedding.” She lifted her chin.
“At least admit you long for me.” He kissed her neck, then the line of her jaw. “We will not leave until you do.” As if he noticed her hesitation. “I think Rhiannon is nearly done with your mother’s dressing.”
She looked over her shoulder, half expecting the wooden door at the top to creak open at his words.
“Fine.” She glanced back into his blue eyes smoldering with the hint of more than kisses. “I long for you to be gone.”
He frowned, but then stroked the golden stubble on his chin. “I’ll take the first of your words as a beginning.” He let her lead him to the stairs.
At the top, she opened the door a crack to see. No sign of Rhiannon. Shoving him past the door, she then pulled the door closed behind them. It was like trying to move a boulder that even the wildest storm could not budge.
Kaireen leaned against the door. Bram kissed the tip of her nose.
“I know how you feel.” The dimple appeared in his cheek again. “I am as breathless as you." his dimple twitched, “because I cannot wait for the day of our wedding dance either.”
He strutted away chuckling. Chasing after him, she hiked her skirts out of her way.
Chapter Nineteen
It was past dark when Kaireen and Rachel nearly finished their chores. She worried the girl would not be able to stay standing for much longer.
“To bed with you.” She shooed her up the stairs. “Thank you for your help. But I can sweep the floors alone.”
Rachel answered her in a yawn and then climbed the stairs.
With a huff, Kaireen grabbed the broom. She had been here too long. The stench she smelled upon first arriving did not seem so strong. Still it was as if Rhiannon’s presence stalked her everywhere.
She was in middle of sweeping when the door at the top of the stairs banged open.
The sound made her jump.
Did Rachel stumble through the door?
“Kaireen.” It was Bram. Just her luck, Rhiannon may come back and have her work all night because of his intrusion.
What now? Did he not have enough time earlier to baffle her? She threw the broom down determined not to let him embrace her. She would be resilient.
They met on the stairs. When he did not make a move for her, she bit down the disappointment that he did not take her into his arms. Hadn’t she said she wanted him to stop? Why did she feel distraught that he might obey?
“Have you seen Elva?”
Is this what he bothered her for, her handmaid’s whereabouts? “No, have not seen her for some time. She and Rhiannon dislike one another, so Elva doesn’t come to the dye chambers if she can avoid it. Not to mention the stench.”
His eyes grew dark, and Kaireen wished to take the bite out of her words. “’Tis your sister, Shay. The babe comes too early.”
No longer caring about Rhiannon and the punishment she would receive for leaving her chores unfinished, Kaireen pushed past him to the stairs.
• • •
Inside the bedchamber, her sister lay pale and dripping with sweat. Pain radiated through her face as Kaireen rushed to her side. The midwife shook her head when Kaireen glanced at her.
Her mother wiped Shay’s brow.
“Douglas always wanted a son,” she grunted.
“Aye, but he would want you both healthy,” her mother added.
Muscles in her face cramped and she screamed. The sound grated across Kaireen’s bones. Never did she want to have a child now.
Still the babe would not be born, nor did Shay’s pains ease.
“’Tis too much for her. I fear she and the babe will pass,” the midwife whispered.
“No!” Shay screamed as another spasm tore through her body. “My son is strong and ready.”
“When did you feel the babe kick last?” the midwife asked.
Shay did not answer, but tears streamed down her face.
Silence choked the air. None spoke, but continued to help Shay push the child from her womb. An hour passed before each stared at Shay’s son.
The cord was wrapped around his neck. His blue skin showed he did not breathe. The midwife eased the cord from his neck.
“Let me hold my son.”
The midwife did not answer her, but rubbed the babe’s arms and
legs as if to wake him.
“Give me my son.”
With a sob, the midwife placed the lifeless child in Shay’s arms. “Sorry milady, but he did not make the journey.”
Shay cooed to the child as if he were alive. “See, he has his father’s chin.”
Kaireen cried. It was unfair the suffering her sister had to endure. She wished to take the burden of her pain away.
“Let us clean him for the burial,” her mother soothed.
“He is all I have left of my Douglas. You will not take him.”
“What of Megan?” Kaireen asked, but she was answered with a scowl.
They let her cuddle and speak to her son while the midwife urged the afterbirth out, and then cleaned the birthing.
“Shay.” Her mother brushed back her daughter’s blond hair. “Let him go. Douglas waits to greet his son, too.”
With words of encouragement, Shay let the midwife take her son. She sat watching them leave.
Then she rocked back and forth in the bed, singing a child’s song of mourning.
“I will wait with her tonight,” Kaireen said dragging a stool beside the bed.
Her mother and the midwife nodded and then left.
Kaireen dug through her sister’s old trunk and removed a fresh leine. Then she eased off Shay’s sweaty leine.
Using the water from the pitcher and a rag, she cleaned her sister, and then dried her. Then she dressed her sister in the clean leine.
She chatted about her punishment and the smell of the dyes. But her sister did not answer her. With the bed linens changed, Shay lay upon the bed.
“Come the morn, you will have a proper bath. The warm water will sooth you.”
Unsure about what else to do, Kaireen blew out the candles, and then climbed into bed beside her sister. Waited until she heard her sister breathing before she let sleep take her too.
• • •
Sunlight crept through the window. Kaireen stirred, disoriented that she was not in her room.
Then she remembered. “Shay?”
Her sister did not answer her. An eerie silence waited. She hopped from bed and then rushed into the hallway. Perhaps her sister bathed this morning. But her heart knew otherwise.
A servant scrambled down the hallway.
“Have you seen my sister?”
“No, miss.”
Kaireen rushed to her parent’s chambers. Outside their door, she pounded on the wood.
Her mother swung open the door.
“Have you seen Shay?” she asked before her mother spoke.
Moments later, everyone searched the keep for her.
But she could not be found.
Kaireen hitched up her skirts and raced to the stables. The stable boy confirmed her fears, that two horses were taken in the early morning. She knew Shay had taken one of the horses, but who had taken the second? She could not dwell on questions, so instead saddled her horse, and then mounted. Outside, she galloped to the coast. And she prayed she was not too late. She should have stayed awake all night. Let someone else watch her sister after the morning meal.
After hours of riding, she passed the hill before her own keep.
One of the missing horses grazed ahead. Instead of stopping to catch the beast, she rode on.
At the edge of her keep, the other horse skirted away at her approach. She saw a figure hunched at the edge of the cliffs. After her horse halted, she jumped off. Her bare feet flew across the grass.
Now she realized she did not put her slippers on this morning. As she was breaths from the figure, she realized it was Bram. His wool cloak covered his frame.
She heard his remorseful voice mixed with the waves crashing against the sea. Her heart leapt in her throat. He cradled Shay in his arms.
Chapter Twenty
Kaireen forced one foot in front of the other as she stalked around him.
As his hand brushed Shay’s hair, he stared at the waves. “Did not reach her in time.”
At his words, Kaireen wanted to shout for him to stop. She could hear no more.
“The babe slipped from me as I snatched her back.” His shoulders shook and Kaireen heard the dismay in his voice. “I did not know about the babe…knew not she had him with her.”
“The babe was already dead.” She saw his shoulders relax and she moved beside him. Her heart jerked at his compassion and the risk of his own life to save another once again. But why would this affect her so? He’d done as much at Shay’s fire. Maybe it was because his choice to do so, and he did it without expecting a reward save their marriage.
She heard Shay groan. “She lives?”
“Aye. But only on the outside.”
Her sister stared back at her with hollow eyes. “Douglas calls me to him.”
“No, Douglas—” What could she say? Her sister would not listen. It was only a matter of time before her sister wasted away or succeeded in her breaking her body upon the rocks.
“Let us get her back to your father’s keep.” Bram stood. As he carried her sister, she rounded up the other horses. They tied Shay’s mount to his. But let Shay ride alone with Bram’s horse leading hers. Mounted, they rode back to her parent’s keep.
“Perhaps after a few days, she will be better,” he said as Kaireen nudged her horse closer to his.
It was a miracle he was able to hold onto her sister. She was more like Kaireen than anyone else. And she knew, if she had her heart broken twice, no one would have been able to snatch her from death as Bram had done. “Did you chase after her here?”
“I was already here at your keep.”
“How? Why?”
“’Tis my wedding present to you.” He winked at her.
“No need, we will not have a wedding as I have told you ’afore.” When would the daft man listen?
He did not answer her, but let their horses guide them back.
• • •
Inside Shay’s room, her sister squatted in a corner, refusing comfort or food.
Her blond hair was matted, and the smell of the birthing from last night clung to her.
“Shay, please.” Kaireen reached for her. “Megan worries about you. She’s too young to understand.”
But her sister did not answer her. Only sang a baby’s lullaby.
“Let us bathe.” She held out her hand and tried to smile. “Who will watch your daughter if you go?”
Her sister’s song ended in mid-sentence. “Father and Mother.” She waved her hand as if shooing a fly. “Or you and your husband.”
“I am not married,” Kaireen huffed.
The hint of a smile crossed Shay’s features for a second, and then disappeared.
What else could she say? Her mother and father cared for Megan. The child, almost three years old, did not understand why her mother did not come to the morning nor evening meals.
Already, the sun dipped to the west. Bram had been no use since they returned. After caring for his horse, he had wondered around outside.
“At least eat something,” Kaireen begged.
Her sister resumed her rocking.
Then a knock sounded on the door as though whoever it was held good news instead of the tragedy her sister bore.
Elva entered with a smile. “Out of bed with you, lass. Time for bathing before the meal.”
“My Douglas and son call to me,” she moaned.
“Do not speak nonsense,” Elva chided her. “No excuse got you out of a bath when you were Megan’s age, and it will not now.”
“She has suffered—” Kaireen objected.
“Only prolonged by herself.” Her handmaid looked at her so intently that Kaireen took a step back. “Now, rise or I will lop off your hair.”
Her sister did not respond.
“You want to be bald when you meet your new husband?”
What was Elva speaking of? Already her sister had lost her husband in death, she did not need another.
“Douglas was my love. I will have no other.”
“Aye, but you have been blessed.”
“Blessed?” Kaireen screeched. How could her handmaid be so crude?
“If you are finished, or do you want more trouble from me.” Her handmaid squeezed her hand as though telling Kaireen to keep her mouth closed. “Then I will turn a switch on you myself as your mother so often threatens to do, but never has.”
Kaireen frowned, but nodded. What would her ramblings hurt?
“But I cannot marry. Douglas was my only love.”
“You are blessed, because great love will come twice in your life.”
Shay glared at her.
“’Tis truth I speak. Did I steer you wrong about Douglas?” Elva waited a moment, and then rocked back on her heels. “Now, then, do you want the first memory of you for your new husband to be like this?”
“I lost my love.” She shook her head. “I will not marry again.”
Elva yanked Shay by her hair. Kaireen screamed and pulled her handmaid’s arms. “Aye, Douglas was your night.”
At her words, Shay’s arms fell to her sides.
“But this one will be your day.” She released Shay and held out her hand.
Her sister took it. They strolled down the corridor, to the bathing room.
Kaireen followed them. She would not let her sister drown herself in the bath.
“Where is he?” Shay whispered as if this false husband would leap from the stone walls.
“He comes from across the sea.”
“I get seasick.”
Elva patted her hand as they walked. “A giant of a man. You will tame his tongue to our language, and he will tame your stomach for the sea.”
“But what about my son? Why did he have to die?”
Not looking where she stepped, Kaireen tripped. What would her handmaid say now?
“Was not his time to come yet.”
Tears welled in Shay’s eyes, and Kaireen feared the singing again.
“Yet, the wheel turns right again for you. Your son will return, but he will bring four brothers with him.”
Kaireen shook her head. It was not right for her handmaid to fill her sister’s head with fancies that would not come.
“Each will be born on the sea. One during a storm.”
Inside, Shay undressed. Then she climbed into a steaming tub. “Join me?” she said to Kaireen.
Time After Time Page 82