“That’s good, son. I’ll drive up with Mildred next week. We’ll have dinner. We would love to see Ruby again. I haven’t seen her since she was a baby.”
“She’s five now.” He smiled at the mention of his little girl. “Five going on fifty. Sometimes I wonder who the parent is.”
James nodded. “Raising girls is tough. Your father tells me you moved to this side of the country in order to spend more time with her.”
“I did. San Francisco was great for my career but it wasn’t great for her.”
“That’s admirable.”
“It was the right thing. Now if you’ll excuse me. I have to head back upstate. I have to get back before school lets out.”
“Go. Go. We’ll talk later.”
Carter thanked Mr. Westmore and left the building. If he got on the road right away he would have just enough time to pick Ruby up from school, but if he hit traffic he would be late and he didn’t want to risk that. He already had some making up to do. He pulled his iPhone out of his pocket to call her school to ask them to put Ruby in the after-school program just in case he didn’t make it. He hated to do that to her, but sometimes it couldn’t be avoided.
There were four missed calls. All from Ruby’s school. “Fuck.”
Today was a bad day for her to get sick when he was so far away. He prayed that she was just a little sick, a tummy ache, a rash, something that wouldn’t require an immediate trip to the emergency room.
“Hello, this is Carter Lancaster,” he said when the secretary picked up the phone. “Ruby’s father. I see that you called.”
“Yes, Mr. Lancaster. I don’t know if you were aware but today was an early release and there is no after-school program. Is there somebody coming to pick her up? She’s been waiting for half an hour.”
*
“She’s tried on nearly every dress in the store,” Maggie whispered to Belinda as she walked up to her flustered-looking salesgirl.
“Who?”
“The same lady who was here before you and Mike went to the bank.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. That’s why we called you. I don’t think we can take much more of this.”
“Ick.” The customer, a busty bleached-blond female, came rushing out in one of their sexiest black dresses. “It doesn’t fit. Nothing in this whole damn store fits me. I came here because everybody keeps telling me that I would be able to find clothes here. This place is just like every other overpriced boutique in this town.”
Belinda’s hackles went up. “Hello, miss. I’m the owner of this overpriced boutique and I’m here to tell you that if you want everyday low, low prices you can head to the Walmart in Kingston. If you want good-quality fashion you’ve come to the right place.” She walked forward, surveying what the customer was wearing. “Of course nothing fits you. We have the same problem. Big boobs, big butts, small waists. Size Me Up tailors clothing to fit your body. This dress would be amazing on you if you let us take it in at the waist.”
“I don’t have time for that! My party is tonight and my ex is going to be there with his new girlfriend and I have to look fantastic or else the bastard wins.”
Belinda sighed. “Well, why didn’t you just say that?” She turned to Maggie. “There is a black corset in the underwear section with gold detailing. Can you grab it for me?” She looked back at her customer. “Shoe size?”
“Ten.”
“Got it.” She pulled a pair of strappy black stilettos off the shelf, then dangly gold earrings and a beaded gold necklace to complete the look. “Turn around,” she ordered the customer when Maggie brought her the top. “And breathe in.” She fastened the woman into the corset, handed her the jewelry and the shoes, and told her to finish getting dressed.
The woman did. When she went to the mirror to look at herself, she had nothing to say.
“You look like a modern version of Marilyn Monroe, honey. Make sure you curl your hair tonight and wear red lipstick. His girlfriend will look like dog food next to you.”
“I take it back. You’re worth the money.”
“You’re damn right. Maggie, ring her up and give her my card.” She extended her hand to the customer. “Belinda.”
“Rhett.”
“Nice to meet you, Rhett. I do wardrobe consultations. You call me next time you’re having a crisis.”
“I will. Thank you.”
She turned away from Rhett to nearly run into Mike. “You’re scary-good at that.”
“At what?
“Being bossy and telling people what to wear.”
“Some people find cures for diseases. I, however, can put together one hell of an outfit. If only I could put together my personal life as well.”
“You will, and speaking of your personal life—your husband is on the phone. He says it’s urgent.”
“Urgent?” She walked away from Mike immediately and into her office to pick up the phone. “Hello?” She couldn’t imagine what urgent matter he would need to discuss with her or why her heart rate had sped up when Mike told her that he was on the phone
“Bell?” She could tell by the strain in his voice that something wasn’t right.
“What’s the matter?”
“It’s Ruby. She’s stuck at school. I forgot it was an early dismissal and there’s no after-school program. Please, Bell. Can you pick her up for me?”
Part of her wanted to laugh at the absurdity of his request. The man who once told her he didn’t want her anywhere near his daughter was asking her to pick her up from school. But she couldn’t laugh at him. She could hear the panic in his voice, the guilt. Carter was raising her alone. She could only imagine how hard it must be. “I’ll go right now.”
“Thank you,” he breathed. “Thank you. I’ll call the school and let them know you’re on your way.”
Ruby was sitting in a chair by the office door when Belinda walked in. Her little face was scrunched and stormy. Something pulled painfully in Belinda’s chest looking at her.
“Hey, baby doll.”
Ruby looked up at her, pinning her with those gray eyes that looked so much like Carter’s. “He forgot about me again.”
“He didn’t forget. He’s just stuck in the city,” she lied. For some reason she felt the need to defend Carter. Or maybe she was just trying to soothe Ruby’s hurt feelings. Nobody should feel like they were forgotten.
“He’s not here,” she said stubbornly.
“I’m here.” Belinda, not sure what to do, approached Ruby and ran her fingers through her tangled curls. “I’m going to take you back to my store for a little while and then we’ll go to my house and make cookies and I’ll let you sit in my big bed and watch whatever you want on TV till your daddy gets back. It will be fun. I promise.”
Ruby looked at her for a long moment, and Belinda knew she was no substitute for the girl’s father.
“I’m sorry, Ruby.” She slid her hand down to cup Ruby’s soft cheek. “You know he would be here if he could.”
She nodded, but Belinda could tell she didn’t believe her. She felt very sorry for Carter at that moment. It was going to take a lot to make up for this one.
“Let’s go, honey.” And this time she took Ruby’s hand as they left the office.
*
“This is my store, Ruby,” she explained to the stonily silent child when they entered the store. “I get to help other ladies play dress-up and my friend Ellis makes dresses and she fixes everybody’s clothes so that they will fit. It’s a great job. I get to work with my friends.”
Ruby said nothing to that. She hadn’t said a word since she got in the car.
“My office is down the hallway. My friend Cherri painted the walls for me so it looks like 1920s Paris.”
Still nothing. Not that Belinda expected much of a reaction, but she wanted Ruby to say something, anything. She hated that she looked so upset.
Fix it. Fix it!
The voice inside her kept telling her to do so. But she
really didn’t know how. For the first time in her life she didn’t know how. She could outfit an army of women in forty-five minutes but she wasn’t equipped to deal with an upset child. Or any child, for that matter.
Ruby walked two steps ahead of her with her oversized pink backpack on her back, her head down as she made her way to the back of the store. Belinda watched her with a sinking stomach.
“Whose kid is that?” Ellis, appearing from nowhere, whispered.
“Carter’s. He’s in the city.” She shook her head as she looked at miserable Ruby’s back. “It’s a long story.”
Ellis followed them down the hallway to Belinda’s office. They both watched Ruby as she slung her backpack on the floor, and then they looked at each other. She was hoping that Ellis would have some insight to offer, but she only looked as lost as Belinda felt.
“How do you make a kid feel better?” Belinda whispered to her best friend.
“I don’t know.”
“What do you mean you don’t know? You’re knocked up. Doesn’t some kind of mommy gene kick in or something?”
“It hasn’t kicked in yet. Maybe I’m like my mother. She was never fond of small children. I swear she didn’t like me until I was ten. You should probably call your mother. She loves little kids.”
She couldn’t call her mother. She didn’t want to explain why she had Carter’s kid.
“Can’t call her. We are going to have to handle this. Ruby,” Belinda called tentatively. “This is one of my best friends in the whole world, Ellis. This is her store, too. She’s the one who makes the dresses.”
“Hi, Ruby.” Ellis gave her a soft smile. “I could make you a dress if you wanted. I could make you a princess gown.”
“You can?” Belinda shot Ellis a look.
“Got asked to make a flower girl dress. Then the wedding got canceled. It would take no time to fit a dress on Ruby.”
“Would you like that, baby doll?” Belinda asked the pouting child. “Do you want a princess dress?”
“I’m not a princess. I’m nobody! I’m nothing!”
“Ruby, no…”
“He keeps forgetting about me. He forgets to give me money for trips, and he forgets to buy me shoes and feed me breakfast. He forgets about me all the time. I hate it. I hate—”
Belinda dropped to her knees in front of Ruby and cupped her angry red face in her hands before she could finish her sentence. “You are not a nobody. You are wonderful.” She kissed her forehead and her tiny nose, and the light sprinkling of freckles that dusted her face. “Your daddy knows that. He loves you, Ruby. He loves you so much.” She picked up the small girl and cuddled her close.
All the fight seemed to have left Ruby’s body in that moment and she went limp in Belinda’s arms.
“He didn’t do it on purpose, Ruby. He would never leave you on purpose. You are the most important thing in his life. You know that, right?”
She nodded, her eyes filled with unshed tears.
“He’s raising you all by himself, and raising a kid is hard without a mommy to help. I know you’re mad and you have every right to be, but try to cut him a little slack.”
“Okay,” she sniffed as a tear escaped her eye.
“You can cry if you need to. It’s okay.”
If was as if she needed permission. She let a few tears slip, her chest softly heaving. Belinda could tell that Ruby wasn’t a regular crier. She was pretty tough kid with no mother and a father who was trying to make up for it all.
“Don’t cry on my clothes, Rube.” Belinda wiped her tears away with her thumbs. “Tears stain this kind of fabric and this dress cost way more money than you have in your piggy bank. You might have to get a job to pay for it.”
Ruby gave a watery laugh and snuggled into her chest. Seeing her smile caused Belinda to release a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Seeing Ruby so hurt had affected her, made her want to make everything better.
It was an odd feeling, one she didn’t want to examine too closely. Ruby was Carter’s child. Carter’s. The one he made with the wife he didn’t tell her about.
“Thank you for coming to get me.”
“So polite, even when you’re royally pissed off.” She kissed her forehead. “I like that about you.” She sat Ruby up on her lap and ran both her hands through Ruby’s messy curls until they were neat and fluffy. “I’m going to take you back to my house now. I think maybe you could use a rest. I just need to tell Ellis that I’m taking the rest of the day off.”
“It’s okay with me,” Ellis said, making her jump. Belinda had no idea her friend was still there or how long she had been staring at them with that curious expression on her face. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
CHAPTER 14
The long road home …
Carter pulled up to Belinda’s townhome for the second time. He couldn’t help remembering his last visit there, and for a moment he regretted coming here to pick his daughter up. He should’ve had Belinda meet him somewhere. He should have gone to her store. Anyplace but here. The combination of his feelings for Belinda and the guilt over his daughter was enough to kill him.
It had been a week since he’d gone to her store, a week since he last touched her, and for a moment he thought time and distance from her would help clear his mind, would put him back on track. But every time he left his house he found himself searching for a glimpse of her. Every redhead he saw reminded him of her.
And today when he was at a loss Belinda was the first person he called. He didn’t think to call Steven, whom Ruby had known longer than Belinda, and that troubled him. It told him he was in too deep with Belinda again already. She wasn’t his wife anymore. Not really. She had walked out on him during the hardest time of his life. And as much as he felt for her, he couldn’t trust her not to walk out on him again.
He sat in the car for a few moments trying to gather the strength to get out. Ruby probably hated him. He didn’t blame her. He was an hour and a half later than he’d expected to be. Traffic had been hellacious. An early Yankees game turned the highway into a parking lot, and the whole three-and-a-half-hour car ride home he thought about how he was going to make this one up to Ruby. He had messed up a lot in the time that he had her, but he had never left her stranded at school. This was one he couldn’t forgive himself for.
He might have to break down and buy her that iPhone she wanted.
Or a pony.
He finally got out, slowly walking to the door, his legs protesting after being stuck in the car for so long.
What was he going to say to her? How was he going to explain this one?
Belinda opened the door before he even got the chance to knock. She was barefoot, her body encased in a blue dress that hugged her in all the right places. Seeing her waiting for him at the door made him flash back to their married days when she used to greet him at the door when he came home from work. Then she used to throw her arms around him and kiss him deeply. But now things were different. Seeing her familiar face waiting for him caused a twinge in his chest.
“You look like shit,” she said in greeting.
“I feel like shit.”
She smiled softly at him as she stepped aside to let him in. He brushed against her as he entered her place and caught a faint trace of her scent. Orange and ginger. The same exotic smell she’d used when they met.
“Can I get you something to eat or drink?” she offered politely.
“I’m fine, but thank you.” He wanted to get his daughter and get the hell out of there. Being around Belinda made him feel like he was walking through a fog. Her nearness combated with his common sense and he needed to think clearly now. He needed to focus on his daughter. “How was she? I hope she didn’t cause you any trouble.”
She shook her head. “Of course not. She’s a good kid.”
They both fell quiet for a moment as awkwardness surrounded them. It seemed that neither of them knew how to behave around the other in that moment.
“Whe
re is she?”
He looked around Belinda’s town house just so he had an excuse to pull his eyes away from her face. He hadn’t had a chance to look at it the last time he was there. He’d come storming in, brimming with emotions he didn’t know how to deal with. He was too pissed to notice the smaller details last time. But the place suited her. It was boldly decorated with brightly colored paintings on the wall, but it was homey at the same time with overstuffed furniture and shelves filled with books and photos of her friends and family.
It looked like a home. It was so unlike his, so unlike the one they’d shared four years ago. She didn’t get the chance to put her touch on that place. He wondered what it would have looked like if she had.
“She’s upstairs in my bedroom watching The Adventures of Milo and Otis.”
Her comment caught him off guard, and he set his eyes on her face once again. “You rented Milo and Otis for her?”
Her cheeks went slightly red and she folded her arms beneath her breasts, pushing them into his eye line. She studied his face carefully as if she was bracing herself for a blow. “No, I own Milo and Otis. I also own the entire collection of Muppet movies. You got a problem with that?”
He almost lost his train of thought as his eyes lingered on her chest for a moment, but he remembered their conversation and forced his eyes back to hers. “I never thought you would develop a love for kids’ movies.”
“I didn’t develop a love for them. I’ve always loved kids’ movies,” she said quietly. “I just never told you because I wanted you to think I was smart.”
“What?”
“I didn’t want you, fancy-pants San Francisco architect, to think you’d married an immature weirdo.”
Everything inside him paused in that moment. “You honestly think that knowing that would have changed how I felt about you?”
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