She pulled away from him and took Ruby’s hand as she walked away to greet her mother, which reminded him that they weren’t a couple. “Hello, Mamá.”
“Hello, Carter. How are you?” She looked at her daughter and squeezed her face. “My pudgy Pudge. I’m so glad you came today. I wasn’t expecting you to come. You need to eat more fruit and vegetables so I am glad you did. Well, maybe you shouldn’t eat too much fruit because fruit turns to sugar and you know sugar gives you a little bit of a round belly.” She rubbed Belinda’s tummy. “But that’s okay. Fruit is good for you. So many vitamins. I saw on the television that people put greens in their smoothies. Like kale and spinach. It looks yucky to me, but all those yucky things are so good for you, no? Plus with all the other fruit in there you don’t even taste the green stuff. I think we should try to get some greens for you today. It would give you so much more energy and then you would want to exercise more. And the exercise will help you slim down for your big day.”
“She doesn’t need to slim down,” Carter said.
“What big day?” Belinda asked at the same moment.
“Carmina.” Bill Gordon walked up behind his wife. He was the last person Carter expected to be there that day. “Stop bugging the girl. She’s fine how she is.”
“Of course.” She kissed Belinda’s cheeks again. “I just want her to look her best. Oh, hello, you gorgeous girl!” Carmina bent to scoop Ruby up. “I nearly didn’t see you there. How are you, sweet pea?”
“I’m fine, thank you. Are we going to buy fruit?”
“Yes.” Bill took Ruby from his wife. “We are going to buy fruit and bread and cakes and whatever else we want.” Bill gave his wife a long hard look. “We are here to have fun. Not to worry about anything else.” He took Ruby and walked away, and in that moment Carter’s respect for Bill Gordon went up a little more.
Twenty minutes later they were a quarter of the way through the market. Carmina chattered her way through the stands, saying so many words that at times he found it hard to keep up with her, but in a way he found her charming.
Belinda didn’t. She hadn’t said much since her parents had arrived. Belinda was the most confident person he knew, but he wondered if her mother’s comments bothered her more than she let on.
He walked up beside her, catching her fingers in his hand. “Are you okay?” he asked her quietly. She locked eyes with him nodding briefly, pulling her hand from his. And once again he was reminded that she didn’t want Ruby to think they were a couple. That she didn’t want to get back together with him yet. It was a punch in the gut. Every time she put distance between them it was like a hard punch that took his breath away.
They stopped at a little stall that sold handmade soaps. Carmina pulled her husband to the manlier selection. He heard her said something about sweaty feet and locker rooms but he couldn’t pay attention to her because he was too busy looking at Belinda with his little girl.
They were hand in hand again, as they had been most of the day. It wasn’t as if Ruby needed her hand held inside the market—her hand just seemed to merge with Belinda’s every time she was near her. If he didn’t know any better, he would say that they were mother and daughter.
Belinda picked up a pink bar of soap, sniffed it, and then held it down for Ruby. “Smell this one, Ruby. I’m thinking about buying it. Do you like it?”
She nodded and took the pink brick from her hand. “I like it. But it doesn’t smell like you.”
“No?” Belinda raised a brow. “What do I smell like?”
“I don’t know. Something else. Like something good. I like that smell better because every time I smell it I think of you.”
“My sweet girl.” Belinda bent down and pressed a kiss to Ruby’s head. Watching her do that—watching her be so natural and comfortable in her affection to his child—made a little knot form in his stomach. How could she say she loved Ruby, how could she get so close to her and not want to be permanently in her life? Ruby was already attached, couple or not; if Belinda were ever to walk out on her, she would be heartbroken.
“Lancaster,” Bill called. “Take a walk with me. I want to look at some bait.”
“We can all go, Dad,” Belinda said, giving him a cautious look. “I can’t wait to see what kind of gross things you want me to put on my hook.”
Bill’s face softened for a moment as he looked at his daughter. “I didn’t invite you, Junior. There’s a reason for that.”
“You want to surprise me with bait? You don’t have to. You know I’ll just crawl out of my skin if I don’t know what you have for our next fishing trip.”
“You’ll survive, Bell. Your father and I are going to pick out some good bait.”
Bill nodded once and walked away. Carter followed him, almost not wanting to, but knowing the conversation they were about to have was long overdue.
To his surprise they did head to a stand that sold all kinds of fishing gear. Bill hadn’t said a word yet, he just walked over to the fishing poles and picked up a small pink one. He studied the tiny rod, which almost looked ridiculous in his large hands.
“Do you think this is a good starting rod for a five-year-old?” he asked him.
“I don’t know, sir. You know more about fishing than I do.”
“You’re right. I also know more about my daughter and I know the last time she was involved with you she came home with a crushed heart.”
There it was, out on the table, just like that. He could try to defend himself. He could tell him about Bethany and about Ruby’s accident and why it took him so long to come back, but he didn’t.
“I know. I was wrong and I’m sorry about that.”
Bill looked up at him. He pinned him with intense eyes that were nearly the same as his daughter’s. “I should kill you. I should snap your neck and bury you in my backyard. I would do it. I would do it because you asked her to marry you without meeting us, without a phone call. You had a wedding without inviting us. We’ve got one damn kid. One kid who means everything to us and you didn’t even have the common decency to have a simple conversation with me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You’re damn right you are! You’ve got a girl. How the hell would you feel if you didn’t meet her husband? If you didn’t give her away?”
“Like shit, sir. Worse than that. I would feel like somebody stabbed me in the chest.”
“I could have forgiven you for that if you had at least made her happy. But you broke her heart. You didn’t come after her. She came back here broken and miserable. She didn’t get out of bed for two days. She cried for you, and just for that I should kill you.”
“But you won’t.”
“No. I saw you at the park with your kid the other day. I saw the way you are with her. I saw that you were with her. I wasn’t there a lot when Belinda was little. I wasn’t around until she was twelve, when I looked at her and realized that I didn’t know my own kid, when I realized that she wasn’t happy. I know about you. I know you used to work all the time. I know you stopped because you were missing out on your kid’s life. I respect you for that, because you figured out how much of an asshole you were long before I did.”
“Ruby’s my life,” he said softly, not knowing what else to say.
“Belinda is mine. I know sometimes my wife and I interfere more in her life than we should, but I feel so damn guilty for missing out on so much of her childhood and we’re trying to make up for it. Now you’ve got to make up for missing out on her life, too. She doesn’t deserve to be let down by the people she loves anymore.”
“I know. I love her. I want her back in my life for good.”
“I see the way you look at her when she’s not looking. You’ve got the look of a man with his balls in a vise grip.”
“Isn’t that what being in love feels like?”
“Yes. My damn wife has the temper of a bobcat and talks more than a women’s chorus on a coffee break, but she’s got me. Bill Junior’s got you. Wha
t are you going to do about it?”
“I want to marry her again. Life is too damn hard without her.”
He turned the fishing pole over in his hands. “I want grandkids. And if I kill you I’m pretty sure I’m not going to get any so I’m going to allow you to marry my daughter again, but if you break her heart again, I’m not only going to snap your neck—I’m going to break every single bone in your body.”
“I understand.” He nodded. “There’s only one problem.”
He raised his thick brows. “What’s that?”
“She doesn’t want me back yet. She says I need to date other people.”
“Does she now?” He smiled. “That’s my Junior. Stubborn as hell. I know exactly how to fix that.”
CHAPTER 20
Stormy weather …
Carter glanced at Ruby through the mirror as she stared at him while he shaved. Her arms were folded over her chest, her lips turned down. Her forehead was furrowed. She was pissed.
He tried to ignore her death glare but it was hard. She looked kind of cute. Plus she had every right to be mad at him. “Are you all packed, baby girl?”
“I’m not a baby and I’m not packing.”
He put his razor down, took a deep breath, and turned to face her. “Why are you so mad, Rube?”
“I don’t want you to go out tonight. You said when we moved here that you was gonna stay with me. I want you to stay with me.”
“I’m sorry, but I have to go out tonight.” He was sorry. He had to go out tonight. He had to do this to get Belinda back.
Growing up, Carter could never go to his father for advice about anything—especially women—but Bill Gordon seemed to have a fountain of information to share with him about the women in his family.
Sometimes, son, you’ve got to give a woman exactly what she is asking for.
And that’s what Carter planned on doing. Giving Belinda exactly what she was asking for.
“I do stay with you more. And we talked about this. I told you I was going to start seeing ladies my age.”
“No you didn’t! You asked me if it was okay. I said you could date Belinda. I didn’t say you could go on a date with another lady.”
“Well, it’s good thing that I’m the adult and you’re the child, because I don’t have to listen to you. I’m going out tonight and you’re going to spend the night with Belinda. So get your stuff packed or I will pack it for you.”
“Fine!” She turned to leave, but he heard her mumble something under her breath.
If he thought she was going to back down he was sorely mistaken. He had fallen in love with one incredibly strong woman and raised another. There was an early grave in his future. “What did you say, young lady?”
She turned around, her little face red with anger. “I said she’s your wife. You aren’t supposed to date people that are not your wife.”
She was right and he should have never told her they were married. Belinda was right. Ruby was confused by their relationship. He thought she understood about them but how could she? She might act like a wise old woman but she was just five years old.
“Do you know what a divorce is, Ruby?”
She nodded. “It’s when people get unmarried.”
“Yeah.” He didn’t know what else to say to her or how to say it to her. The simple truth of the matter was that he was married to Belinda. He still thought of her as his wife. He still loved her. There was no moving on. There was no life without her.
He had a plan. He could see their future. He just had to get through tonight.
“Well, Belinda and I were unmarried for a very long time; that’s why you haven’t seen her until this year. I have a piece of paper that says she’s my wife but she’s not my wife really. We haven’t lived together or had fun together or talked in a very long time. Belinda and I are friends. We like each other very much, but we aren’t married like most people are.”
He watched her as she tried to process his words. Her face was scrunched with confusion but he knew that no matter how much he tried to explain it to her she wasn’t going to get it, get Belinda’s and his relationship, because he didn’t get it himself.
“I’m sorry, honey.” He picked Ruby up and kissed her cheeks. “I wish I could make you understand but I don’t know how.”
“My tummy hurts.” She rested her head on his shoulder. “I don’t like being mad at you.”
*
Belinda opened her front door as soon as she saw Carter’s headlights shine through her front window. She was ready for her sleepover with Ruby. She had bought all the fixings for ice cream sundaes. She’d rented movies and bought pizza and buttered popcorn. She even got a special nightgown and slippers for the occasion. Tonight was going to be fun. She kept telling herself that all day. All she had to do was ignore the little ache in her chest and the knowledge that the only reason she was able to keep Ruby tonight was because Carter had a date. Foolishly she’d forgotten that she’d agreed to do this, or she had pushed it out of her mind. Maybe it was the trip to the farmers’ market, or the fact that he took her and Ruby to the movies the next day that made her think that he was no longer going to see Molly. But he’d called her later and asked her to keep Ruby. Not for a few hours but overnight. Overnight.
While he was out with another woman.
Another woman that she had practically forced him to go out with.
Father and daughter approached her but instead of the happy faces she expected they both looked kind of miserable, and Carter had this weariness in his eyes that made her heart squeeze.
“Hey, baby doll.”
“Hi.” Ruby dropped her bags on the floor and hugged Belinda’s leg, resting her head on her thigh for a long moment.
“What’s—” Carter caught her eye and shook his head. She dropped her question. “Ruby, put your things in my guest room. I made it up special just for you.”
“Can we lay in your bed and watch TV tonight?”
“Of course, but I bought all the things to make ice cream sundaes. Don’t you want to make them first?”
“No, thank you. My tummy hurts.”
She let go of Belinda and headed upstairs to put her things away. Which left Belinda alone with Carter. He looked so … sad. It made her want to wrap her arms around him.
“We had a rough evening. She wouldn’t eat her dinner.”
“It’s okay. I have food here. Why is she mad at you?”
“For so many reasons.” He took in a deep breath and locked his sad-looking eyes on hers. “Do you think I should cancel tonight?”
“Is she that mad? I usually don’t advocate backing down with five-year-olds, but I’m not in your shoes.”
“This is not about Ruby. This is about me and you. Do you want me to cancel tonight?”
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes!
But she couldn’t say that. She couldn’t tell him that she was horribly jealous or that she hadn’t slept well since he had asked her to take Ruby overnight. Or that when she did sleep she saw him with Molly in her dreams. “You go have fun,” she told him instead. There was that fake cheerfulness in her voice again. And in that moment she hated herself for it. “I know you don’t get to do grown-up things very often. It’s rare you get to eat in a restaurant that doesn’t have paper place mats and kids’ meals. You go and enjoy yourself.”
“I love restaurants with paper place mats and kids’ meals. I like having my little girl with me.”
“We’ll be here when you get back,” she said, suddenly feeling the need to cry. “Go out tonight. She’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”
“I know.” He took a step toward her and pulled her into his arms. He did nothing but hold her tightly against him for a few moments, his nose buried in her hair. “Bell.”
She shut her eyes, holding him back, loving the way he felt pressed against her, not sure she could go the rest of her life without him or even a few more days. “What is it?”
“Nothing.” He let her go. “Than
k you for keeping her tonight.”
*
Belinda sat on the edge of Ruby’s bed and looked down at the sleepy child. It had started to pour in the last hour. The rain was pounding against the windows; streaks of lightning made the room flash bright purple. It was one of those spring showers that made it hard for Belinda to sleep.
“Are you scared of the storm?” She leaned down and pressed a kiss to Ruby’s cheek.
“I like storms. I like to lay in bed and listen to the thunder.”
“Do you?”
“Yeah, I like it when the thunder shakes the house. Sometimes I scream, but I’m not scared. Sometimes it’s just fun to scream.”
“You’re very brave. Much braver than I am.” She lay down next to Ruby, taking her small hand in hers. Even though she was feeling shitty, it was nice having a little girl around. It was nice not having her house feel so empty. This is what she wanted. A child. It had taken her so long to figure that out, but she wanted to be a mommy. “So you’re going to be okay up here by yourself tonight? I have to go downstairs into my office for a little while.”
“Don’t worry about me. I had a long day. I’m going to go to sleep.”
“Good girl.” She smiled at her mature answer then kissed her again, ready to leave her and work on the ordering for the next week.
“Belinda?”
“Yes?”
“Can I live here with you?”
Totally taken aback by the question, she stared at Ruby. “I—um … What about your father? You can’t leave him. Who will take care of him?”
“I can live with you some of the time and with him some of the time. He could live here with us, too, but I don’t think he wants to live with you. He went out tonight. He didn’t tell me with who. But I know it was with that stupid lady.”
“Don’t call her stupid,” Belinda scolded softly. “It’s not nice.”
“I don’t like her. She pretends to like me so my daddy will pay attention to her. If he marries her I’m moving away. She can take care of him.”
Gentlemen Prefer Curves: A Perfect Fit Novel Page 26