To my disappointment, it is work. Craig has texted me. Had a no-show. Can you come in?
I can't afford to say no, though I am secretly hoping that Nick will ask me on another date of some kind. I sigh and text back. Of course. What time?
Six. Will pay overtime.
Thank you.
I have two hours before I have to go in to work. It's not enough time to do anything, except perhaps more cleaning. And there is no text from Nick, which makes me feel odd and anxious at the same time. Did I go too far with him? Does he no longer respect me because I am slutty when he touches me? Should I play coy? I don't know how relationships work; my father only let me watch children's television shows and all the romance novels I read were stories from a different century. In those, the women are all impoverished heiresses and the men are all rakish dukes.
I feel too sheltered. Regan and Mike are casually sexual, but there is an undercurrent of unhappiness in their relationship. I don't want to copy it.
But I can't understand why Nick isn't texting me. It must be something I did.
I move to my window and open it wider, leaning out and enjoying the breeze on my face. The sunlight is pure and crisp, the weather gorgeous. I love the sun. I turn my face toward it and sigh with pleasure, and then I scan the street below with interest. There are cars moving along the street in busy lines, and people walk down the sidewalk, bags in hand. It is a normal day.
My gaze slides to the apartment building across the street, and I think about what Nick told me last night. He doesn't live in this building. I haven't given it much thought until now. I stare at the windows on the other side thoughtfully, trying to see a face behind the glass, but there is nothing.
I was driving past and saw you on the street, he said last night.
I know it's a lie. He can't always be driving and conveniently running in to me. I consider this for a moment, and then head to my bed. I sit on the edge and regard my phone. The phone he purchased for me. I pick it up, hesitate, and then make up my mind.
I text him. You're watching me, aren't you? That's how you knew where I was last night.
His answer is swift, which means he has his phone close by and is watching it. Does this bother you?
It bothers me more that he has not texted me until now.
Are you mad at me I send. It's needy and ridiculous, but I can't help myself. The only man I know how to deal with is my father, and he made his frustration known by angry words. I can't handle silence.
Never Nick sends back.
D8Z: Then why the silence?
Nick: I wanted to give you space in case you had regrets or you feel I push you too hard.
The only thing I regret was that I was too scared to do more. But I don't tell him this. I'm just relieved he's not unhappy with me.
D8Z: I want to know if you're watching me, Nick.
Nick: And again, I must ask. Does this bother you?
I consider this. I should be furious, but I'm not. Perhaps because his intervention last night was so timely? I can't be mad if he has protected me with his watching. Still, I want to know the why of it.
D8Z: I suppose it depends on what the purpose is.
Nick: Purpose? Must there be one?
D8Z: Why else would you watch a total stranger? I assume you've been watching me for a while? Since before we met?
Nick: You are clever, my Daisy. And I am a poor liar. Da, I watch you. I saw you and thought you were the most beautiful creature I have ever seen. I cannot stop myself from watching and wondering about you. Never did I think to actually speak with you, though. Have I frightened you?
D8Z: Should I be frightened of you?
Nick: I would never hurt you. Never. I only wish to protect.
This seems to align with what I know of Nick. I think back, realizing that if his intentions were bad, he could have hurt me that day in the laundry room. Instead, he took me shopping and bought me expensive things. I'm wearing a pair of the panties he bought me right now, and my hand flutters to the waist of my jeans in thought.
Nick: I have scared you, haven't I?
I consider this. I know it's not normal for a man to watch someone from afar, but Nick has been my closest and truest friend since I arrived. I am fascinated and besotted with him. I'm not mad. I'm not entirely comfortable, but I'm not mad.
D8Z: Which window is yours? In the other building?
Nick: I will show you. Look for blue.
He's there even now? Is he watching me? I lick my lips, ashamed to feel my nipples harden and the flesh between my legs grow wet with arousal. I peer out the window, looking. Then, I see it. It is a window with the shades tightly drawn, directly across from mine. The blue is the merest hint…
And I blush to realize the blue is my panties that he had stolen from me last night.
D8Z: How often do you watch me? What do you see?
Nick: I see treasure beyond value. I see beauty without compare. I see your every gesture exudes pleasure and joy in even smallest things. I see delight in simply existing. I see you, Daisy.
Heat curls through me at his words. Oh, my. I know he's trying to redirect me with flattery, and it's working. I'm breathless at his romantic text.
D8Z: Are you watching me now?
Nick: Da. Do you want me to stop? For you, I will. I do not wish to make you uncomfortable. I treasure your opinion above all things.
It's on the tip of my tongue to tell him "yes, stop," when I realize I am breathing shallowly with excitement. The fact that he watches me feels naughty and wicked, and I love the feeling. It's scandalous to consider, and I think that is why I enjoy it so much. I do want him to keep watching me…but I want it to be on my terms.
D8Z: We need a signal, I think. If you're going to watch me, let me know first.
Nick: Anything you desire, kitten. I am yours to command.
D8Z: My father and I had a signal when we knocked on the front door or called, so we knew who it was. I want a signal to know you're there. So I know.
I am in control, I realize. If I don't want Nick to watch, I can shut my window. I can tell him to stop. I think he would. For the first time in my life, I am running the show, and I feel heady with the power of it. I control Nick's happiness with a mere thought.
It is all at my discretion entirely. Knowing he watches me changes nothing…except perhaps it makes me aroused to think he's watching me, even now. My hand touches the waistband of my jeans again, and I think of stripping them off in front of my window, all so he can see from afar.
Will he come in his pants again at the sight?
My breath catches; I am panting, and my nipples ache. I want to tell him to come over so we can explore sex some more, but it's not a good idea. I have to work tonight, and if he comes over, I won't want him to leave.
Across the street, at Nick's window, the blinds open a bit, and there is a bright flash, like that of a mirror reflecting light. It flicks once, twice.
Nick: That is my signal to you. Anytime you are curious if I watch, look out your window. If I am, I will give you a signal.
D8Z: I see it.
I see it, and I wonder how much of me he sees. I smile at the window and touch my fingers to the glass as if to say hello.
Nick: I wish your hand was on me and not the window, dasha. Meet me tonight.
D8Z: I can't. I'm working.
Nick: Tell them you quit. It is not good job for you.
I shake my head at the window, as if to silently say, "I'm not quitting." Always, he suggests I quit, and I ignore it. He doesn't know what it's like to see two twenties in your wallet and realize there is no more coming in. I text him again, not wanting to change the subject.
D8Z: So if I ask you to stop watching me, you would?
Nick: Always. You mean more to me than anything.
His words make me warm, and they fill me with pleasure.
D8Z: I'll let you know if I want you to stop. I'm only allowing this because I like the thought of you watching me
.
Nick: Oh? You like it?
I grow bold and smile at the window. I'm incredibly aroused at the moment. I keep thinking of last night, the hot feel of his flesh under my hand. I can't wait to experience that again. I decide I want to play with Nick, leave him wanting me and distracted.
I face the window and my hand slides to my breast. I cup it, picturing his hand there, and gasp at how good it feels to tease my own nipple.
And then I look at my phone, waiting for a response from him.
It comes an eternal moment later.
Nick: Daisy…do you tease me?
I feel a sense of glee mixed with my desire. He's realized what I'm up to. Want me to give you something to watch I text back, feeling so bold and pleased with myself. I want to do this. I'm nervous but excited at the same time.
It takes an agonizing year for his text to come back, but it returns.
Nick: Nothing would give me more pleasure than to see you touch yourself for me. Words cannot describe what I am feeling right now.
My breathing comes shallow and thin, and it's rasping with excitement. I think of Nick touching himself as he watches me. Does he have binoculars? Is he holding them in one hand and grasping his penis with the other? I shudder at the thought of that and pull my t-shirt off before I can second-guess myself and let shyness take over. I'm wearing one of my new bras, and it's lacy and white and so pretty that I feel sexy just wearing it. I'm glad I chose it today, and I bite my lip as I ease one strap down my shoulder, my other hand still clutching my phone.
Nick: Bare your breasts for me, dasha, please. I want to see you touch them.
D8Z: Only if you promise to touch yourself, too.
Nick: Yes.
That one single word fuels my imagination, and I slide my bra down my shoulder all the way. My face is burning with shyness even as my body hums with excitement. For some reason, this is easier than the thought of undressing in front of Nick if he were here in person. It allows me to be bolder. The air caresses my now bared breast, and my nipple is erect, the peak tight and aching. I still cling to my phone in the one hand, but the other is free, and I graze my fingertips over my breast, thinking of last night.
I want to show him more than just my breast. I face the window and tease my nipple a moment longer, and then I slide my hand to my jeans, asking a silent question.
My phone vibrates with another text immediately.
Nick: Show me.
A shuddering breath escapes me, and I set the phone down on my bed so I can have both hands free to unclasp my jeans. I wiggle out of them and kick them aside. I am standing in my room, in front of my window, in nothing but my panties and my bra, one breast exposed. I bite my lip, considering. I am on the second floor. Can anyone see me but Nick? Do I care? I'll never know if they do. Nick's responses are gratifying, though. With shaking fingers, I slide my panties down my legs, strip my bra off, and then wait to see Nick's response.
My phone vibrates on the bed, and I turn to it.
Nick: Touch yourself, kitten. Show me where you liked my mouth.
I suck in a breath at his words. It's one thing to tease him with the thought of touching myself, and it's another to see it written down, realizing he is, in fact, riveted to my every move. I leave the phone on the bed and my hands pluck at my nipples, wishing they were his mouth, his hands. I'm not content with just touching my breasts, though it's sending little jolts of pleasure through my body. I know he will want to see more.
So I let one hand slide to my belly, and then lower.
My fingers brush the curls of my sex. I'm already incredibly slick, the moisture dampening the hair there. I gasp to feel the fluid there, and a racking shudder rips through me when I brush over my clit. His mouth lingered here last night, sucking and licking, and I remember it. I remember how his mouth gleamed when he looked up at me. I wonder if he liked my taste.
My wet fingers go to my mouth, and I paint my lips with the juices of my sex, knowing that he watches. Will he find that erotic? I taste my own musk and think of him, even as my fingers dip to my sex again. I can't slide a finger inside myself while standing, not like he did to me last night, so I pet and soothe my clit, rubbing the wetness back and forth even as my other hand plays with my nipple.
I'm so aroused that when my phone vibrates on the bed, I come instantly, knowing that he just texted me again. It's like the message is the catalyst, and I'm shivering with my quick, hard release. It leaves me aching for only more, though, and I feel momentarily sad that he's not here and is instead watching me across the way.
I wish Nick was here.
I wipe my sex-wet hands on an old t-shirt and toss it into the laundry, and then I pick up my phone to see Nick's text.
Nick: Again, you make me come in my pants.
D8Z: I'm glad. I like the thought of being so irresistible.
I curl up on my bed and slide under the covers with my phone, feeling languid and peaceful. If Nick can't be here, the phone is my connection to him. If I can't be under the covers with him, I'll be under the covers with the phone.
Nick: Ah, Daisy. You are too good for one such as me. Why you even speak to me, I do not know. I do not deserve such a gift.
D8Z: Silly man. I like this relationship, Nick. I like you, and I like that you let me control things. You let me steer. It makes me feel strong. Unafraid. That is the best feeling in the world.
Nick: You wish to be driving us, kotyonok? I will let you drive the Ducati the next time I see you. Would you like that?
D8Z: I…don't know how to drive.
I'm ashamed to admit it. It's one of the things my father never let me learn because he wouldn't leave the house to show me, and going to a driver's education class would have meant interacting with a class full of others, and the thought was anathema to my agoraphobic father. I think, also, it was part of his way of keeping me trapped at his side. I'm excited by just the prospect of exchanging my state-issued identification card for a real driver's license. It is a skill I lack, and one I haven't had the courage to admit to Regan yet because I'm afraid she might laugh at me for being so backwards.
Nick: Then I will show you, little flower. And then you will drive me everywhere, da?
I smile at my phone.
D8Z: Da. :)
NIKOLAI
"SO, DASHA, YOU DON'T KNOW how to drive. This is easy." I point out the pedals. "The big one is stop and the little long one is go. Press both softly at first, until it feels right to you."
"All my firsts are with you," she says, giving me a sly little grin.
I like that. My cock likes it too, and I want to pull her hand over to touch my hardness, but I think it is too soon for that. She is not a whore to be ordered about. She likes to be in charge, and I am happy to wait for her direction, but eventually I will show her how much pleasure she brings to me. "No one else would treasure you like I."
"No one?" She arches her brow now.
It is not arrogance that drives me, but possessiveness. I am afraid she wouldn't like either so I simply shrug.
"What if someone else would…" She pauses and thinks for a moment. My frame tenses up, but she says, "Teach me to drive?"
"Nyet, I would not like that."
"What would've happened if one of my customers had touched me? You seem upset when you come to the station."
"I would have killed him."
"Ha. Ha." She sounds out each syllable so that it is not a laugh but a mocking sound. "No, seriously."
I look at her steadily. No, I think, no joke. I would cut off the hand of a man who touches you. I'd start by sawing off each finger slowly, because death ends the suffering. He'd need to suffer. When her eyes dim and her countenance takes on a worried look, I say, "Kidding."
Only I think we both know I am not.
She turns to start the car.
"Push in the brake, then press the button. Wait for the engine to engage."
She follows my instructions.
"Ease up on the
brake."
The car jerks forward as she releases the brake—too swiftly—and then engages it in a rush. We both jerk forward.
"Sorry, sorry," she rushes to apologize.
"It is nothing. Just, gently."
The second time, it is smoother, and she begins to make big circles around the empty parking lot. We practice braking, turning and accelerating slowly, and then more swiftly. In no time she is maneuvering the rental with ease. Perhaps another time we will try the bike. I wonder what else I can teach her—what other firsts I can show her.
My time with her might end swiftly, but I want her to remember me. The more firsts I experience with her, the longer I will be imprinted in her mind. Enough firsts and she will never forget me.
Time passes quickly, and we stop only because I hear her stomach grumble. She protests when I pay for her meal, but I ignore her protests.
"What else do you want to learn?" I ask as we gulp down sandwiches. Daisy wants to return to the vehicle, and I want to make Daisy happy.
She shrugs and beams a happy smile at me. "God, everything."
A thought strikes me. A woman alone in the city should be a woman armed. I will teach Daisy to shoot a gun. It is one area in which I have extensive expertise. "Let's go to the country," I say. "You can drive out there on the long roads and practice at a faster speed."
Daisy beams at me. This is a good idea, I can tell. Better than a picnic. I will tell Daniel next time we talk that his skills with women are outdated.
I lead Daisy to the passenger side of the car. "When we get away from traffic, you can take over."
Inside the car and on our way west of the city, I broach the topic. "Perhaps another time, I could teach you to handle a firearm. I am worried about you alone at night at the gas station."
Daisy laughs at this suggestion. "I actually know how to shoot a gun already."
I shoot her a look of surprise. This is not the response I expected. It is not that I've never seen a woman handle a weapon. There are women who do the work I do, and there are women in the Bratva, mostly those who trade in sexual favors, but plenty can handle a knife with ease and guns are plentiful.
Last Hit (Hitman) Page 16