by Joanna Lloyd
She gasped and spun to face him. “What are you saying?”
William pushed up from his chair and heading for the door, spoke over his shoulder. “I’m saying it’s time to show me what you can do. I’ll be waiting in my bedroom for you.”
Electra was stunned. The first time was supposed to be loving and gentle, but William made it sound cold and mechanical. Did he think she was a show pony who would perform for him? She was tempted to reach for the poker and do him more damage.
But the fact remained, he was her husband and could claim his conjugal rights if he so chose. Taking a deep breath, she decided two could play at this game. She would give him what he wanted, although she was not quite sure yet what that was. But her heart he would not have. She left the room and slowly climbed the stairs.
Not bothering to knock, she pushed open the door to his bedroom. William sat on a chair by the window, his face obdurate.
“Ah, you have come to perform your wifely duty I see. Undress slowly while I watch.”
What punishment would she get for murder, she wondered? Probably hanging, and he wasn’t worth it. Well, she might as well get this over with. Brushing away a tear, she tried to unbutton the back of her gown, but could not still her shaking hands. She fumbled angrily with the buttons until he languidly strolled over, pushed her hands away, undid the buttons, and went back to his chair. With a slight tug on each shoulder, the gown slid to the floor. By this time, Electra had decided if he wanted a show, she would give him one, the pompous brute.
• • •
As he suspected, she wore neither corset nor pantaloons. William could see the outline of her round, pointed breasts, and the small mound between her legs through the sheer silk of her shift. As he watched, his breathing became shallow and heat suffused his neck and cheeks. Her hands reached up to loosen the knot in her hair, causing the shift to stretch across her breasts. The red-gold curls tumbled chaotically down her back and over her shoulders. As they fell, she deftly slipped the shift down her arms and let it slide in a pool to the floor.
In all of William’s imaginings, he had not known she would be so impossibly beautiful. Her skin was the colour of milk and her breasts were soft and round, with the most delectable rose-coloured nipples. That enchanting tumble of hair draped seductively around her left breast and if he did not remove his trousers immediately, he thought they would burst.
He threw off his jacket and unbuttoned his shirt while she stood motionless, watching. As he removed his trousers, he saw her gasp, wide-eyed at his arousal. Obviously, the captain had not been memorable, he thought. In two steps, he reached her and brought his lips roughly to hers, prying open her mouth with his tongue and probing hungrily. He picked her up, carried her to his bed and placed her on her back. With his eyes devouring her body, he positioned himself over her.
As he looked down, he was surprised to see fear reflected in her golden eyes. He stilled. Did she think he would hurt her? Had the captain hurt her? At the reminder of his predecessor, his hesitation was obliterated by an overwhelming urge to dominate her completely, to wipe out any evidence of the man. She was his wife and he needed to possess her, to mark his territory.
Her eyes were riveted to his face and she seemed unsure, needing direction. “Put your legs around my waist,” he commanded harshly, his mouth moving against her hair.
He traced his tongue from the shadow of her soft ear down her throat and onto her breast. Lifting the milky orb to his mouth, he began to lick and suck until her nipple strained toward him. Despite her determination to remain passive, he felt her body lift toward his, and heard her soft moan of pleasure. He could sense her mind fighting the domination, but her body betrayed her as she clung to him, shuddering with her desire. At their contact, he took a searing breath and heard a low groan from somewhere deep in his throat. His urgency was both thrilling and unnerving.
Grasping her hand, he guided it to his arousal. Her tentative touch spoke of innocence and her trepidation only served to heighten his desire.
She breathed into his ear, “Please, tell me what to do.”
What? Was she going to pretend virginity? Angrily, he grasped under her buttocks growling, “Is that what you said to the captain?” She squirmed under him; her hands, which had held him to her, became fists and she beat at his chest. Each time she tried to speak, he captured her mouth with his and burnt her lips with his scorching need.
Suddenly she bit hard into his bottom lip and he reared back. She gasped, “No. Stop. Please … I’ve never … ”
Shocked, he rolled her to his side, gasping for breath, the realization of what he had nearly done draining the madness from him.
“My God, Electra, you’re a virgin? I thought you and the captain — oh God, how can you ever forgive me?”
Chapter Ten
“Electra? Ye look like ye’ve spent the night in a byre.” Shelagh pulled her into the cabin and nudged the door shut with her elbow.
Electra didn’t care what she looked like. She may never care about anything again. An attempt to speak sent her lip quivering as she fell into Shelagh’s outstretched arms. Her sobbing was loud and convulsive, but Shelagh held her until it was done. Then wiped Electra’s face like a child and set the kettle to boil.
Taking a deep breath, Electra began to speak. “I don’t think I can forgive him for what has happened.”
“Come and sit. I’ll make the tea and ye can tell me all about it, lass,” said Shelagh.
“I hate him. And — and I think I’m in love with him.” She startled herself with the words.
“Ah, this is a wee bit confusing. Ma poor daft mind is no’ makin’ sense o’ this, lass. Why are ye so wretched?”
“I don’t want to be in love with him. I plan to return to England. Besides, he doesn’t love me. And he has behaved abominably. Not only that, he doesn’t trust me, respect me, or care how I feel.”
“I canna say for sure if he loves ye, but I have seen the way he looks at ye and if that isna a man in love, then I dinna ken what is.”
“No, Shelagh, you’re wrong. And you will think the same after I tell you what happened.” Electra paused, turning to watch the kettle bubble on the hob. The flames were as hot as her face as she prepared to tell Shelagh the details. “However, I’m going to feel quite embarrassed in the telling.”
Shelagh raised her eyebrows. “So ye think I’m a wee bit delicate to hear your tale?”
Electra shrugged. “It’s silly, I know. I’m just not used to sharing these things.” She took a calming breath and began to describe their first attempt at lovemaking — so demoralized, she could not meet Shelagh’s eyes as she spoke. She then spoke about the previous night. About William’s callous directions for her to perform and his insensitive treatment of her inexperienced body. Electra explained how William mistakenly believed her to have been the captain’s mistress, how he treated her roughly and without emotion because of it.
Shelagh leapt to her feet, the slap of her hand against the wooden table making Electra jump. “Men and their stupid pride. The selfish misguided fool! Oh ye poor wee pet.” She pulled Electra back into her arms.
Electra could not bring herself to tell Shelagh of the passions William aroused in her. Or how willing she would have been if he had not been so brutal.
“Ye ken he could only have been sae angry about the captain if he truly cared about ye?” she ventured.
Electra gave a wry laugh. “Even so, I don’t know if I can forgive him. I also don’t know if he wants me to stay. With a conditional pardon, I imagine I could get paid work somewhere to support myself until I am able to return to England. Oh Shelagh, the truth is I just don’t know what to do.”
“Why don’t ye see what the next few days bring, aye? Whatever ye decide, I will stand by ye.”
Sheila stood and poured the tea. She handed a cup to Electra and, placing hers on a small table, sat down again.
Electra cradled her cup and frowned. “Why such a ferocious need to
punish me? Even if I had been with the captain, I was not married to William at the time and he knew he was marrying a convict. It doesn’t make sense.”
“Ah, but it does to me, lass. The lad wasna’ punishin’ you. In his mind he was punishin’ the lass who sent him runnin’ thousands of miles from home.”
Electra sat up, her whole attention focused on Shelagh and her revealing words. “What are you talking about? Tell me.”
“Weel, he told Callum one night when they were well blutered and he wouldna’ like it if he finds I’ve told ye.” She thought for a moment. “No, after what ye’ve just told me, I think it’s time.”
Obviously comfortable in her role of storyteller, Shelagh sat back and began. She spoke of the young and beautiful Lady Charlotte betrothed to the second son of the Earl of Canby.
“Second son? I wasn’t aware he had a brother,” Electra interrupted.
“Aye there was a brother, a year older, who died of the smallpox just before his twenty-fourth birthday. Will had already gone soldiering at the time.” Shelagh thought for a moment. “I believe there was a sister as well … yes, that’s right, I remember now. The sister was younger but fell in love with a dreaded Scotsman,” she nudged Electra, grinning, “and the Earl was sae angry he told her she must give up the mannie or leave and ne’er return.”
“Goodness, do you think the Earl even has a heart?” asked Electra.
Shelagh chuckled. “It doesna’ sound like it, aye? Anyway the wee lass was no’ in the least intimidated by her faither. She married her Scottish laddie and happily went to Scotland with him. Now dinna interrupt or I’ll no’ get the tellin’ done.” Electra nodded and indicated she should continue.
Young William, she said, had loved Charlotte from the moment they met and waited five long years for her to be of age. Their betrothal took place on the eve of his departure to fight against the French. When Shelagh told of his injury, Electra connected it with the story he had reluctantly told her in the library. However, she was in no way prepared for the tragedy of both his father and fiancée betraying him in such a vile and premeditated manner. Nor for the tears that rolled freely down her face.
As Shelagh finished, she reached out, clasping Electra’s hand. “I believe he started to feel somethin’ for ye, Electra and when he thought ye hadna’ been truthful, he relived what Charlotte had done and punished ye instead.”
“I suppose in some way that explains his behaviour but it also means Charlotte is still in his heart. How can I compete with that?” There was so much about this man still a mystery to her. And while they kept secrets from each other, they would continue to stumble over each other’s pain at every turn. And now to hear of this woman … she sighed.
Shelagh screwed up her mouth and nodded. “Aye, ye may be right, but all that needs is time. Ye’ve got to admit ye’ve plenty o’ that, lass.”
Electra managed a small smile. “Perhaps. All right, I won’t make any rushed decisions. But I also will not be warming his bed.”
“Aye, but it would sure be a way of makin’ him forget,” Shelagh winked.
Electra rolled her eyes at the suggestion. “Shelagh, I think this is a perfect time to change the direction of this conversation.” Shelagh smiled and nodded for her to continue. “I have been meaning to ask you for some time about the pianoforte.”
“And what about the pianoforte, lass?”
“Well if William bought it for you, why is it in the main house?”
“Ah, have ye looked around ye then? There isna’ the space.” Electra opened her mouth to speak and Shelagh held up her hand, “and afore ye tell me we can make our wee home bigger — ” Electra’s mouth dropped further at Shelagh’s accurate reading of her thoughts. “ — I’ll tell ye I dinna want it other than this, aye? And forbye, when I play in yon big house, the music is for everyone, no’ just me. And, ma sweet lassie, the joy is in the sharin’.”
Electra closed her mouth. There was nothing more to say.
“Come then, I’ll take ye home and with any luck Shi Liang might feed us some o’ his verra fine scrambled eggs.”
• • •
As they neared the back of the house, their chatter was interrupted by high-pitched screams and Shi Liang’s colorful curses. Electra gasped, picked up her skirts and ran toward the kitchen. Shi Liang, broom high in the air, was running at two natives, a man and a woman, cursing and ordering them off the property.
“Yaraay! What are you doing here? What is wrong?”
Yaraay rushed to her, jabbering excitedly and clutched her arms. As the woman grabbed Electra, Shi Liang defended her with a sharp whack of the broom into the small of Yarray’s back. Electra held up her hands to stop the cook as Billy yelled and grabbed for the broom.
“Stop it, Shi Liang! I know her, it’s all right. Go back to the kitchen,” Electra ordered, before he could mount another attack.
He put the broom down but remained, steadfast, beside her. Even when Electra told him to go, he shook his head, his eyes riveted to the women. Shelagh calmed Shi Liang but also remained by Electra’s side, her head tilted in curiosity.
Yaraay turned to her companion and, dragging him by the shirtsleeve toward Electra, pointed saying, “Billy,” and gestured to him to speak.
“I Yaraay man. I work for boss. With sheep.” Electra nodded, remembering him. “Missus, please you help ’im Waruu man. Bulanggi, ’im work for boss too.”
Shelagh also recognised Billy as one of William’s field hands and together the two women discerned that he was Yarray’s husband and wanted help for Waruu’s husband, Bulanggi. Electra encouraged him to continue, asking what had happened.
“Bulanggi take ’im piccaninny from water. Soldya take Bulanggi and — ” he pantomimed a rope around his neck and his body hanging.
Electra was shocked. “You can’t mean the soldiers are going to hang Waruu’s husband?”
He nodded vigorously. Electra looked anxiously at Shelagh, “What can we do? Where are the men?”
“I dinna ken, but I’ll see about finding them, they might just know what this is about, aye? Can ye stay with these two?”
“Yes, of course,” she said, as Shelagh ran toward the stables.
Electra asked Shi Liang to make hot tea for Yaraay and her husband, Billy. Offended, he began to mutter in Chinese, but she fixed him with a hard stare until he shuffled into the kitchen. Shi Liang, not able to bring himself to serve the tea to the two natives, called out when it was ready. Electra went in, retrieved the tea, and handed them both a tin mug.
Yaraay’s eyes darted from side to side, searching for possible danger. It must have taken great courage for them to approach the house to seek her help after Bulanggi’s arrest. Electra probed further and was able to finally make some sense from Billy’s broken English and Yaraay’s pantomiming. She was shocked to hear the full story.
From a distance, Electra saw the stable hand on horseback canter out to the fields to find William and Callum. Shelagh rejoined Electra and they continued with their theatrical communication. Half an hour later, William and Callum thundered into the yard.
Callum dismounted and strode over, pointing his finger at Billy. “Ah so this is where ye are then eh? And I’ve not seen Bulanggi today either. There’s work to be done — ”
“Hold on Callum, there’s something amiss. What is it Electra? Billy?” asked William.
Electra avoided William’s eyes and he shifted uneasily, his eyes overshadowed by a deep frown. Fortunately, the demands of the present allowed certain other issues to be ignored for the moment.
Electra explained, continually looking at Billy for confirmation, that yesterday, Waruu’s husband, Bulanggi had been fishing on the edge of the river near the Purnell property. The Purnell’s small daughter had wandered down to the river alone and fallen in. Bulanggi had dropped his fish and jumped in to save the girl. He had been found minutes later clutching the girl to his chest, stroking her back to calm her.
On seeing Bulanggi ho
lding her child, Mrs. Purnell had screamed hysterically and snatched the child from him. Her husband was not far behind her brandishing a rifle. Bulanggi had run in terror back to Pretty Creek Camp where, a few hours later, members of the New South Wales Corps had arrested him and taken him to Sydney Town to be hanged.
As Electra recounted the story, her throat tightened and she found it hard to swallow. She desperately wanted to believe his story for Yaraay’s sake. She pushed on, fought not to let her own history interfere with justice. Her next words almost choked her.
“William, they think Bulanggi was doing unmentionable things to the child. Yaraay and Billy say he would never do that, but he has been given no opportunity to defend himself.” Unable to focus on her husband, her gaze rested on a tree over his right shoulder.
“Even if Bulanggi’s English was sufficient for a defence, they would never believe his word against that of a white woman,” said William.
“I’ll no’ say ye’re wrong, Will, but if they’re speaking the truth, we canna let him die,” said Shelagh.
William was silent, thinking over the matter while the others waited.
“Getting involved in this could mean social and political suicide. Every small step forward for the farm is dependent on favours and popularity. This will affect everyone here and I’ve got to say, I’m loath to jump into this.”
“He’s a human being, and about to be hanged for something he may not have done. I know what it is to be innocent of a crime and I will do this alone if I have to,” said Electra.
William frowned, given little choice. “All I can think to do is appeal to the governor to give him a proper trial like any other member of the colony. I can try to find someone who will defend him, but we’ll have to accept the final outcome.”
“Surely the child will say he didn’t hurt her,” said Electra.
“Aye, she may do for now but by the time her parents have finished with the bairn, she’ll be believin’ what they believe,” answered Callum.
Yaraay wept quietly while they spoke and Electra put her arm around the woman’s shoulders, surprised that Yaraay’s semi-nakedness no longer made her uncomfortable, although it was a relief to see she had tied a small skirt of possum skin over her lower regions. However, Shelagh seemed to have trouble keeping her eyes averted from Yaraay’s bare breasts. The two men directed most of their attention to Billy.