Free to Risk

by Lillianna Blake

  “Alright, I’ll try.” I rolled my eyes. “Thanks, Wes. You really did cheer me up. But I will be changing my password.”

  “Good, you should. I mean, they even give you suggestions of what a strong password is when you make one. Do any of those suggestions include using your child’s name?”

  “Bye, Wes.” I laughed as I hung up the call.

  I was still giggling to myself when the time came to leave to pick up the kids. I knew that I should have been annoyed—Wes really overstepped—but I couldn’t. He kept me laughing all afternoon and that laughter was just the medicine I needed.

  Chapter 17

  After baths and bedtime, I was still buzzing with amusement. I kept thinking back to the video conversation I’d had with Wes earlier. He really seemed to know exactly what I needed to feel better.

  As I started on my evening chores, I decided to take a moment to check my phone. I’d left it in the kitchen while the boys soaked the bathroom and demanded help finding towels. When I picked it up, I saw that I had a notification from Forty and Free.

  I grinned as I opened Hancock’s message.

  Noella, I got your note today and I have to say that I’m quite curious about you. I hope that we can connect soon. And no, I’ve never heard of naked chess.

  I almost dropped the phone. My mouth grew dry as I wondered just what message Wes had sent to him. I scrolled back through to find it.

  Hancock, you seem like an interesting fellow. I’m looking for someone who enjoys picnics in the park, a good hot cup of coffee, and long conversations about nothing in particular. If you think that might be you, please contact me. But if you’re one of those guys that are into naked chess, forget it.

  “Oh, Wes!” I shouted at the phone, but that didn’t get my point across. Instead, I let my fingers do the talking, texting him.

  Wes! Naked chess?

  I shoved my hands into the soapy water and began to wash the dishes.

  On one hand, I was actually excited to meet Hancock. On the other, I was mortified that he thought I knew what naked chess was. I was halfway through the dishes when my phone rang. My heart lurched. Was Wes calling me on the phone—a real phone?

  I grabbed for my phone and almost knocked it into the sink with my slippery hand. Once I got a grip, I answered.

  “Hello?”

  “Noella!” Nicole’s voice rang through my ears.

  “Nicole.” I laughed and felt some relief. “What’s up?”

  “I just wanted to check in with you. I know after that bum date you might be feeling a little down. I can’t help feeling a little guilty about all of it.”

  “Don’t feel guilty at all. It’s fine. I thought I was going to take a break, but it turns out I might just go out on another date. So I guess I’m getting back on the horse.”

  “That’s wonderful news! I’m calling with some good news too—at least I hope so. Gavin and I would like to invite you to our place for a long weekend. I think it’s about time we got together. What do you think?”

  “I think that’s a great idea.” I frowned. “But honestly, Nicole, I don’t get much chance to get away.”

  “You can bring the boys with. Please think about it. I get the feeling that you don’t do a lot of things for yourself and—well, I just think maybe you deserve a little break.”

  “I really can’t. Both boys have soccer and school stuff this month that they can’t miss, not to mention the fact that I’ve just started the new job. But I really do appreciate the invitation and of course I’d love to meet in person one day.”

  “Aww, okay. Well, please do keep it in mind—just in case something changes. Oh and definitely let me know how the date with the new guy goes.”

  “I will.”

  We chatted for a few more minutes about the ins and outs of online dating, then I let her go so that I could finish the laundry.

  When I settled in for bed I realized that I hadn’t written Hancock back.

  I pulled up the message again, still miffed that Wes had sent such an embarrassing message. As I read the things that Wes had described me liking, I realized he knew me better than I expected. Everything was accurate and they were things that I hadn’t included in my profile.

  I knew that Hancock might be waiting for a message back. I would be.

  I carefully typed my response.

  Hancock, sorry for that silly question. I can have a strange sense of humor sometimes. I’d like to chat with you soon. I’m curious about you too. I’m sure we’ll have a lot to talk about.

  I decided to include my number. I didn’t want to spend too much time typing back and forth. I wanted to hear his voice and get a good read on who he was. I vowed that this time I would be much more cautious.

  I already found myself looking forward to trying again. It surprised me that, after Glenn, I actually still wanted to try. Maybe it was because all my friends had coupled up, and there was nowhere for me to look that I didn’t see love and romance. Or maybe Wes’s words had hit deeper than I realized.

  Whatever the reason, I fell asleep feeling excited at the possibilities.

  Chapter 18

  Work was busy the next day and then there was a trip to the dentist for both boys. They did a great job on their own, so I was able to hang out in the waiting room.

  I skimmed through my texts and noticed that I’d missed one from Wes.

  Yes, it was a little strange, but let’s be serious—if you knew about naked chess, you’d be curious about his answer, right?

  I laughed as I read it over. There it was again—his ability to reach out of nowhere and make me laugh. I toyed with my phone as I considered how to text him back. Before I could, another message came through—this time from a number that I didn’t recognize.

  Good afternoon, Noella. I hope that we can talk soon. Are you free this weekend? I’d love to meet you.

  I realized that it was from Hancock.

  It seemed impossible at first to even consider meeting him. I couldn’t ask my babysitter to stay longer again. But the next weekend was our meet-up with Samantha. I didn’t want to wait three weeks to meet him.

  Then I remembered that this Saturday was my mother’s day with the boys. She liked to take them to the park and out for ice cream at least once a month.

  I sent him a text back agreeing to meet him on Saturday at Common Grounds. I felt the safest there. Even though I hadn’t spoken to him on the phone yet, I thought it was best to have a plan in place. I could always cancel if our chats didn’t go well.

  Fantastic! Are you free to talk?

  I texted back that I wasn’t, but that I’d try to call him in the evening.

  When I finished our conversation, my text from Wes popped back up. I read over the note again. In my mind, the comment verged on scandalous. We’d never talked about things like this when we worked together. I could ignore it or I could play along.

  I decided to have a little fun with him, since he had so much fun with my Forty and Free account. I did a quick search for a gif and sent back a picture of people actually playing naked chess. It didn’t show any bits and pieces, but there was enough skin to get the point across.

  After the dentist, we headed for Dawn’s bakery. She had invited us all to dinner to try out some of the new soups she’d been pairing with her breads for the fall and winter season. She also had a special treat for the boys—for a successful trip to the dentist.

  When I arrived, Hanna and Zoe were already there along with Jake and Trent.

  “Hi, everyone.” I grinned as the boys ran toward them, Tyler eyeing Hanna’s stomach with a frown.

  “When is my cousin coming out?”

  “Not yet.” She laughed. “Not for a few more months.”

  “Yes, and we need that time.” Jake gave her stomach a light pat. “Lots to do, right, Hanna?”

  “So much.” She rolled her eyes. “I thought planning a wedding was hard. Oh! By the way, Blu said she could be here to meet up with Samantha. Isn’t tha
t exciting?”

  “Wonderful.” I sighed with contentment as I sank into a chair. I couldn’t wait to see Samantha and Blu. “How are you feeling, Hanna?”

  “I’m doing okay.” She shrugged as she sat down beside me. “I’ve been trying to focus on having a positive attitude.”

  “She’s pretty positive that her feet are going to explode.” Jake winked as he leaned over to kiss her cheek.

  “They won’t, trust me.” I gave her hand a squeeze. “It’ll all be over soon.”

  Zoe sat down on the other side of me. “So what have you been up to?”

  “I have another date.” I smiled. “For this Saturday. Just for coffee, of course.”

  “That’s great!” Zoe gave me a side hug. “I’m so glad that you went for it. I know how discouraging it can be sometimes.”

  “Me too.” Dawn set napkins and silverware around the table. “Just keep at it, Noella, you’ll find the one before you know it.”

  “The one?” I cringed. “I’m not so sure about that. But at least I’ll have the chance to meet new people.”

  “New naked people?” Zoe raised an eyebrow as she stared at my phone.

  I’d set it down on the table and apparently Wes had texted me back.

  “Uh, that’s nothing.” I laughed.

  “Is chess some kind of new fetish I don’t know about?” Zoe grinned. “Let me see.” She grabbed for my phone before I could get it.

  “Zoe! Seriously, it was just a silly joke.”

  “Or some serious flirting.” She lowered her voice as she handed the phone back to me. “Who’s Wes?”

  That question made my heart speed up. I wasn’t sure how to define him.

  “He’s a friend that I work with—actually, that I used to work with. He got me the job where I am now.” I tucked my phone safely into my purse. “He’s a jokester.”

  “Oh? How come we’ve never met him?” Hanna leaned closer to me.

  “Well, actually, I’ve never met him. When we worked together we would teleconference. We got to be friends over time, I guess.”

  “And he’s still calling you?” Dawn smiled as she set down a few bowls of steaming soup.

  The boys were thrilled when they saw the hot biscuits and breadsticks that Garrett brought out from the kitchen.

  “Yum!” Tyler reached for a breadstick.

  “Boys, go wash your hands first and I want you to try some soup too.” I rolled my eyes. “They are both now going through a picky phase.”

  “Aw, come on, Noella, I made extra breadsticks and biscuits just for them.” Garrett grinned.

  “Alright, fine, but don’t blame me when they become carboholics.”

  “Aren’t we all?” Hanna whispered and snatched a biscuit from the bowl. “So, like Dawn asked—this Wes guy is still calling you? And texting?”

  “We’re just friends. He’s just a kid. But he’s very nice.”

  “A kid?” Zoe eyed me. “How old are we talking?”

  “Thirty. He’ll be thirty-one next month.”

  “And she knows his birthday! It’s official, there’s something going on here.” Zoe nodded, then touched the tip of her nose. “I can smell it.”

  “Weren’t you listening, Zoe? He’s young.”

  “Not that young.” Dawn shook her head. “What’s nine years?”

  “Nothing.” Hanna looked over at me. “There’s no reason to sell yourself short.”

  “Look, that might be true when men are older and women are younger, but you know it’s a different story when it’s reversed.” I frowned. “Besides, like I said, we’re just friends. Nothing else is going on.”

  “Nothing but naked chess.” Zoe winked.

  Chapter 19

  The next few days were a whirlwind of activity and avoiding Zoe’s knowing looks and Hanna’s curious questions. I did my best to resist the urge to text or video chat with Wes, but even if I’d wanted to, there wasn’t time. Things had picked up at work and I was often working through lunch.

  I did manage to have a few calls with Hancock. I noticed as we spoke that he seemed a bit old-fashioned about things, but I knew that not everyone would share all my views. I was relieved when he mentioned that he preferred a more traditional relationship and didn’t want to rush things physically.

  On Saturday, while the boys were visiting with my mother for the afternoon, I headed to Common Grounds. Normally I would take the time to catch up on cleaning and maybe even watch a “grown-up” television show, but I decided that could wait. I was curious about Hancock and I hoped that he might help to get the bad taste out of my mouth from my last date.

  When I arrived at the cafe, I waved to Alex. She waved back with a smile and pointed me toward the private table once more. I appreciated how much extra effort she made for me. She was always there for all of us whenever we needed advice, and her attitude was always upbeat and inspirational. I wondered if she realized just how many people she impacted each day with her great personality.

  As I settled at the table, I thought about the conversation I’d had with Nicole earlier. I knew she might be a little hurt that I’d rejected the possibility of a visit so easily, but I just didn’t see how it could happen.

  Yes, I could steal an hour or two here and there thanks to my great friends and family, but it was hard to imagine having an entire long weekend away, especially since I was already leaving the boys with my mom next Saturday so that I could see Samantha. I didn’t like to rely on others too much, even if they were willing. And of course it was hard to imagine being away from my sons for several nights in a row.

  Still, seeing Nicole would be a great treat for me. It was hard when friends lived far away. I missed Blu all the time. She was like a second sister to me, as she and Hanna had been best friends growing up.

  Once the boys were grown, I’d have a lot more freedom—that’s what I told myself. But at the same time, I hated the thought of looking forward to them growing up. I loved every minute I had with them, even the messy, crazy moments.

  “Noella?”

  I’d been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn’t even been watching the door. Now a man I assumed was Hancock stood beside my table with a nervous smile on his lips.

  “Hancock? It’s nice to meet you.” I smiled warmly, hoping to put him at ease.

  “You too,” he stammered, then sat down across from me. “You can call me Hanc if you want. Most people do.”

  “Oh, great. You have such an interesting name.”

  “Thanks. Trust me, it wasn’t interesting growing up. But my father wanted to give me a sense of refinement, I suppose.” He chuckled. “Noella is a beautiful name and unique as well.”

  “Oh, trust me, I had my share of teasing too. No-yella was one my sister would always use on me when she stole my stuff.” I laughed.

  “Clever. I don’t have any siblings myself. Only child.” He shrugged. “I suppose that’s why I’m a little socially awkward—like you couldn’t tell.”

  “Don’t worry about that. I’m a little shy myself—and new to this. Well, I’ve tried a couple of times, but—I don’t know—I don’t seem very good at it.”

  “Well, then we can be bad at it together.” He smiled again.

  I decided that I liked his smile. His lips were thin to the point of almost being nonexistent, but when he smiled, his face lit up and revealed a dimple.

  “That sounds good to me.” I glanced up at Cyndi as she walked over to take our orders.

  Before I could begin to give her mine, Hancock jumped in.

  “I can only have a certain kind of coffee and I need to be sure that it is actually that coffee, so please bring me the package so that I can verify it. It’s Green Brew. I saw it listed on your website.”

  “Oh yes, we have it.” She nodded. “Are you allergic to other coffees?”

  “I just need to be sure it’s Green Brew, please.”

  “Sure, no problem.” She glanced at me with a light smile. “Do you want your usual, Noell
a?”

  “Sure, thanks.” I smiled in return.

  I could understand people having dietary needs. It was a little unusual, but I did my best not to judge.

  “You come here often?” He raised an eyebrow.

  “Yes, my friend owns it. Isn’t it a wonderful place?”

  “I suppose.” He glanced around. “It’s a little bright.” He squinted at the brightly colored chairs. “For a single mother it seems a little financially unsound to waste money on places like this. Have you considered how much money you could save by making your coffee at home?”

  “Oh.” I stared at him, unsure how to react. My gut wanted me to tell him that he had no business thinking about my financial situation, but I figured that would put an end to the date pretty quickly. “Actually, I do make coffee at home. I come here more for the company than the coffee, though the coffee is spectacular.”

  I waited as he verified the bag of coffee beans that Cyndi brought out. He even checked the expiration date. I gritted my teeth and tried to be patient.

  “The thing is, I see it a lot, especially the women I meet on Forty and Free. They’re all struggling financially, but they get their hair done and their nails. They wear the latest fashions. I see that you’re not as frivolous as that. Good for you.”

  I tucked my hands under the table. No, I didn’t get my nails done and I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had a haircut, but those things just didn’t interest me.

  Chapter 20

  Hancock’s attitude was quickly getting under my skin. I thought about just letting it slide, but I just couldn’t remain silent.

  “I don’t think being a single mother means you shouldn’t be able to take care of yourself or have the things you like. Many single parents are just fine financially, but even if they aren’t, they still deserve to have things that make them happy, don’t you think?”

  “I suppose.” He shrugged. “Personally, I don’t see any value in any of it. It’s vanity.”