by Kimbra Swain
“Please, get permission,” I replied hanging up the phone. Finally letting it sink in that Dylan was gone, I rushed to my room, slamming the door as the reality of it overwhelmed me. Dropping to the floor, I cried until my chest hurt from heaving breaths. Unfettered magic swirled around me since I charged my tattoo before we went out. Emotionally and magically charged was a dangerous state of mind for me. I couldn't lose grip on the control of the fairy within me. As amped up as I was, I felt Levi sitting outside my door and could hear his tears as they rolled down his cheeks.
I feared to go to the memorial. If the crowd was like the one at the courthouse, I did not want to disturb those who mourned for Dylan. Someone dying, because I attended a memorial would be more than I could handle. I would find another way to say goodbye without causing anyone else pain.
The magic settled in the room like an electric blanket, warm and charged. I felt like an empty shell devoid of magic and emotion. The heart I’d sworn I didn’t have was crushed to a million bits.
When I moved to the earthen realm, I suppressed my fairy personality and traits. I wasn’t proud of that being. She was cold and calculating. After roaming the earth, I found myself in the south where it was hospitable. Every place in this world had its flaws, but something about being here made me feel welcomed. It was the complete opposite of the being that I used to be.
When I moved into my first trailer park, my neighbor brought me a covered dish. Her name was Sharolyn, and she was wonderfully grandmotherish. I looked the dish skeptically, and she laughed me.
“You might as well be leery, child. You don’t know me from Adam, but I assure you I make the best mac and cheese south of the Mason-Dixon line. I certainly don’t make it for just anyone. But since we are neighbors and I wanted to make the right impression, I made some for you,” she explained.
I allowed her to enter my home and tasted the mac and cheese, then proceeded to beg her for the recipe. She laughed at me saying it was a family secret.
“I don’t have a family,” I replied.
“Well, I got plenty of family. You can have some of mine,” she said. From that point on, until the Sanhedrin chased me out of town, Miss Sharolyn invited me to all her family dinners and eventually gave me her recipe.
The evil I’d forsaken I felt coming back as the humanity I’d embraced slipped away from me. A cold, dark queen who ruthlessly took whatever she wanted with no concern for anyone else. The fairy council had every right to banish me. I loved the earthen realm because I could control the humans there to do my bidding. Mostly of course, the men.
When I received word that I could return to that realm, it was because I had changed. This world changed me. I feared if I ever returned to the Otherworld that heartless creature would take me over again. In just the few moments that Levi and I used the ways, I felt that cold sinking into me.
Now that I had no heart to stop me. I could turn this town upside down finding who killed those children and exacting retribution. My craving for vengeance stirred the magic in the room. Like a huge whirlpool, it swirled around me waiting to be drawn back into my body.
“Grace,” I heard Levi at the door.
“Not now, Dublin,” I whispered.
“Please let me in,” he replied.
I didn’t respond to him, but I hadn’t locked the door. There was nothing stopping him from coming in other than he was a sweet man and wouldn’t dare enter my room without permission. The more I thought about it, I realized that Levi was the only thing I had left.
“It’s unlocked,” I relented, hoping his presence would brighten the bleakness inside me.
He turned the knob looking in at me. “I felt darkness coming from the room. Are you okay?”
“No, and you should probably hit the road, honey,” I said rising from the floor.
“I’m not leaving,” he replied.
“You’ll end up dead too,” I said.
“No, I won’t,” he said. “You can’t shut everyone out, and I’ll prove to you that I can be just as stubborn as you.”
Without warning, I dropped the glamour, stalking toward him. Letting the full power of the fairy realm swirl around me, he trembled, but did not back away as I stalked toward him. The boiling power around me sank back into my skin causing goosebumps to appear. I smiled at the tingle running down my arm. Blowing across it, the tingle passed from me to Levi, and he shivered as his arms erupted with goosebumps. “Fuck,” he muttered.
Running a long fingernail down his jawline, he shook, but it wasn’t fear that gripped him. Leaning into his ear, I whispered, “You will do as I say.” I traced the outside edge of his ear with my tongue, and he moaned.
“No, Grace,” he said collecting his wits. So, I turned it up. Pressing my body to his, I ran my hand down his chest to his crotch. He stepped away from me before my hand drifted too low.
“You ache for physical touch. I could give you what you wanted, and you could leave this place never wanting again,” I cooed.
He’d backed himself to the wall and had no other place to go, except out the door. I put my hands on the wall on each side of his face, licking my lips within inches of his sweet, frightened face. As I leaned in to kiss him which would put an end to his resistance, he grabbed my chin as he had in the parking lot of the Food Mart. Instead of kissing me, he held me away from him.
“Grace, you are playing a game. This isn’t you. I’m not leaving, but I won’t let you do this either no matter how much my body begs for it. You loved him, and he’s gone. You will just have to deal with it like all the rest of us do,” he reasoned with me.
Dropping my hand from the wall, I tried pushing forward to him, but he held my chin tightly. Surging toward him with power, his hand slipped from my chin to my neck. “Yes, choke me, Levi,” I purred pretending to be at his mercy. He released his grip and turned his face from me still pinned to the wall.
His hand brushed mine as he gripped the engagement ring on my finger. He pressed against it with his finger pushing in around my finger. As it twirled around my finger, I felt power move around us.
His voice cracked as he began to sing, “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound.”
“You stop that now,” I growled. Soft tendrils of power slowly worked their way around me like the embrace of strong, caring arms. The dark, cold magic shrank away from the warmth.
“That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now I’m found.”
I backed away from him as his rich and steady voice filled the room. His tones were resonant and soulful. “Stop, Levi!” I cried as the cold power swirling around me quelled at his song.
“Was blind, but now I see.”
Our roles reversed as I backed against the opposite wall behind me. He approached me steadily with his hands up as a defense.
“Through many dangers, tolls, and snares, I have already come,”
My glamour reset, and I stood before him as plain Grace with a broken, grieving heart. Once he was within reach, he touched my face wiping my tears. Trembling with anguish and the power of his song, I bowed my head in shame for what I’d done.
“Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far, and Grace will lead me home.” As he finished, he rested his forehead on mine.
“I’m sorry, Levi,” I choked through the lump in my throat.
“I know you are, Grace.” I hugged him burying my face in his chest. “We all grieve differently. I clam up and brood. You go psycho fairy queen.”
“Levi Rearden!” I said with as much effort as I could manage. It was weak at best. I’d claimed Levi as my bard with the knowledge that I would have power over him, and he over me in return. I never imagined he would figure it out that quickly. “You sing like the angels.”
“Thank you, Grace,” he whispered. “I haven't sung since my momma died.”
I looked up and kissed him on the cheek. “Then I am honored,” I replied. “Now let go of me. This is awkward.”
“Yea, it is. I need another beer,” he sa
id, releasing me and walking to the kitchen.
“I'm going to bed,” I said.
“Okay, I'm here if you need anything,” he said as he pulled the door closed, but left a small crack of light.
Embarrassed at myself, I climbed into the bed and swore never to awaken that beast inside of me again. Gloriana was a bitch.
A couple of days passed as I moped around the trailer. Dylan’s memorial was today at the small funeral home in town. The newscasts covered his heroic death, reporting the shooter had been arrested.
Levi walked into the living room in his dress pants and button up shirt from the hearing.
“Grace, get dressed,” he scolded me.
“I'm not going. I do not want to stir up strife when it's his day,” I said.
“He would want you there,” he said.
My cell phone rang as it had the last few days with various people offering condolences. Levi became my secretary because I feared to talk to any of them.
“Hello,” Levi answered. “Yes, she's right here.” He handed me the phone. I scowled at him.
“Damn, Levi,” I cussed him.
“I'm not lying to a preacher,” he said. “And you might want to repent for cussing me.” His eyes twinkled as he teased me. Bless his heart. He's tried to remain light-hearted even though I know I scared the crap out of him.
“Hello,” I answered.
“Miss Bryant, allow me to express my deepest sympathies for the loss of your friend,” Bro. Matthew Rayburn, the local Baptist preacher said. I’d met him several years ago. He was always kind and thoughtful. Not the hellfire and brimstone you would expect from a southern preacher.
“Thank you kindly,” I responded.
“You are coming to the memorial, right?” he asked.
“I'm not sure. I never want to repeat the events from the courthouse the other day. It's probably best I don't put anyone else in danger,” I replied.
“Grace, Sheriff Riggs was my friend. He spoke highly of you. He would want you to come, and forgive me for saying it, but you owe it to him to be there,” he pushed. “The memorial will be tightly controlled. I trust there will be no incidents.”
Shocked by his words, I didn't know how to respond. So, I simply said, “Okay.”
“I look forward to seeing you there,” he said hanging up.
I sat stunned for a moment. I owed Dylan my life, but there was no way to repay that now.
“Get up!” Levi prompted.
“Okaaaaay!”
I owned a plain black dress that didn't scream whore, so I wore it with the black sweater from the hearing. Pulling my hair half back, I clipped it with a claw barrette.
Levi was on the phone again. “Here she is,” he said handing me the phone. Before I could scold him, he said, “It's Lysander.”
“Demetrius, we are leaving for the memorial. What do you want?” I said having no desire to talk to him. He called yesterday saying he obtained permission for us to attend the memorial, and I refused to speak to him then.
“All charges have been dropped, Grace. The officer outside will remove your ankle monitor,” he said plainly.
“What?”
“New evidence was presented to the judge, therefore he dismissed the charges. However, I warn you. They haven't given up and will continue to build a case against you. This was just a technicality. You still need to prepare to leave,” he said.
“What was the technicality?” I asked.
“A video of Miss Capps and Deputy Troy Maynard surfaced. Apparently, they had a sexual relationship. When the prosecutor questioned Maynard, the deputy stated that Miss Capps coerced him into helping her get evidence on you,” he said. “I'm not sure exactly what evidence he influenced, but the judge threw it all out now. The prosecution has to start again from scratch.”
“Gee, Lysander, you sound upset that I’m not going on trial,” I said, then hung up on him.
Levi nearly tackled me with a hug. “Slow down, Dublin. We aren't out if the woods.”
“I know, but I'm so glad we don't have to stay in the trailer,” he said smiling.
“Will you drive?”
“Yeah sure, just show me the way,” he said taking my hand. “You can take the ring off now.”
“If it's okay with you, I’d like to leave it,” I said knowing that he could subdue me if needed.
“Sure, but you will be fine,” he said.
“If Ella is there, I'll take it off,” I teased.
“I don't even know that girl,” he said.
“You barely know me, and we’re engaged,” I replied
“Sure, I do. We go way back,” he said. “To like, last week.”
Laughing at his nonsense made me feel better. My bard and I went to Dylan’s memorial.
Before we left, Deputy Kwaski removed the ankle monitor. “Glad this worked out for you, Grace,” he said, and for the first time in several days, I was free.
When we arrived at the funeral home, there were people mingling in and out of the rooms. There were only two presentation parlors, and one was closed.
A large portrait of Dylan Riggs sat at the double doors of the other. A moment frozen in time with his infectious smile and sandy hair. I could almost hear him laugh looking at the picture.
Levi squeezed my hand bringing me back from my memories. We entered the large room, sitting on a pew near the back to avoid drawing attention.
Many of the townsfolk were there speaking in soft tones. Near the front Stephanie, Dylan’s ex-girlfriend sat with an impeccably dressed olive-skinned man. From his skin-tone and dark hair, I guessed he was of Grecian descent. I stared at him, thinking he might turn around so I could get a better look at what she chose over Dylan.
“Is it bad form to bring your boyfriend to your ex-boyfriend’s funeral?” I asked Levi quietly.
“In the south, I think it's bad form if you don't show up to the funeral. They don't care who you are with as long as you pay your respects,” he said seriously.
“I see,” I muttered. I guessed the woman who got him killed wasn't any worse than the cheating ex-girlfriend. The dark-haired man turned after our quiet conversation, locking eyes with me. Looking away quickly, Levi caught him staring.
“You think he heard us,” Levi asked.
“I don’t know how he could have. We weren’t loud,” I said.
“Fairy?” Levi suggested.
“I hope not,” I replied, as the man turned his attention back to Stephanie who patted tears on her cheeks. She looked fake as hell to me. Something wasn’t right about her, other than she didn’t chose Dylan.
A couple walked past us, and I realized it was Mrs. Betty and Luther from the diner. She patted my shoulder as she passed.
It reminded me of the day I met Dylan at the diner for a business lunch. At least, he claimed it was business. The entire time we ate, he laughed and joked. He only asked me one question about a selkie, and if I’d ever heard of them living in freshwater. I hadn't, but it didn't mean it wasn't possible. I introduced him to Kelpies, who did reside in freshwater bodies.
Sometimes he would call on the phone and lead with a question about folklore or creatures, but then the conversation would drift to football or a tv show he watched. He would tell me about who got arrested without violating any police procedures. I always knew he had a girlfriend, therefore I didn’t consider his attentions anything other than friendly.
Clinching my teeth, I squeezed my eyes tightly, dismissing the memories before they flooded over me. If anything, Dylan Riggs was my friend in a town where I had very few friends. I missed him already. Levi put his arm around my shoulders and squeezed.
We sat reverently, listening to people providing antidotes of their experiences with the lawman Dylan, as well as the neighbor and friend he was to everyone. I couldn’t think of a soul that didn’t like him.
A woman sang a song about going to rest on a mountain. Bro. Matthew Rayburn gave a touching speech on laying down your life for others, and ho
w Dylan promised to do that as an officer of the law. But he also completed that oath to this community by saving the lives of innocent bystanders. It occurred to me that I’d been self-centered thinking he saved me, but actually he saved a whole community by taking a bullet that might have gone astray from its target. Another child could have died had he not acted on his instincts to protect.
The service dismissed with a prayer, and people filed out of the auditorium with tear stained faces. Levi grabbed my hand for us to leave when the pastor approached us. I groaned, because all I wanted to do was go home.
“Miss Bryant, may I speak to you in private for a moment. Mr. Rearden may come too,” he said motioning to a side room.
I nodded, and we followed him to an overflow room that would open to the main auditorium if the crowd swelled past capacity.
He shut the door behind us. “According to Mr. Riggs’ last will and testament, his ashes were to be given to you, Miss Bryant. Would you like to take them with you now?”
“What? No, there must be some mistake. Surely one of his family should take them. Not me,” I protested.
“His lawyer informed me of the will when he and I discussed the memorial service. I don't know why they didn't tell you. To be honest, I was shocked at the request. His attorney assured me that the instructions were explicit saying he drew up the will two years ago. I knew Dylan considered you to be his friend, but I didn't realize how close,” he said.
“Apparently, neither did I,” I muttered.
“Will you take the urn now, then?” he asked.
I must have looked mortified, because Levi said, “I’ll get it, Grace.”
We followed the preacher into the main room, and Levi lifted the urn off the center table.
“Miss Bryant, if there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. We would love to have both of you join us for Sunday services,” Bro. Rayburn said. He seemed to be a very nice man despite him bring a preacher.
“Maybe we will visit sometime,” Levi said. I wasn't in the mood to shush him, plus he was just being nice.