by Webster, K
“Bring us some of those,” I tell him. “And whatever else you got. I’m starving.”
Jim waddles off, leaving me alone with my brooding teacher.
“Are you always so…mercurial?” I ask as I pick up my beer.
He lifts his glass and chugs it rather than answering me. I watch as his Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. I’d like to lick that too. Too bad this guy is an icy motherfucker. I’d love nothing more than to get hot with him.
Truth is, though, I’m not sure I would know what to do with a man like him. I’ve been with guys around my age. Guys who are down for a quick fuck or blowjob. I haven’t ever been with a man who radiates so much emotion. Something tells me you can’t dip your toes in with a man like Vaughn Young. You’ll drown. He’s deep.
Not to mention, married.
I sip my beer and wonder what kind of woman marries a man like Vaughn. Is he a total dick to her? Is she one of those nagging types who makes him eye-fuck students because he can’t get laid by his own wife?
We’re quiet until Jim brings out some baskets of greasy shit. I’m hungry as hell, though, and can’t be choosy. I order some shots of tequila, earning a death glare from Vaughn.
“We’re supposed to be learning,” he grunts.
“Lecture away, Professor.”
He grits his teeth but then begins talking. At first, I’m fixated on his mouth. His lips and his tongue when he licks away a lingering crumb from his food. But then, I begin to notice his passion. I start to hear what it is he’s so passionate about. He discusses economics in a way that isn’t so fucking boring. Hearing his excitement has me interested. It kind of reminds me of how my stepmother, Ava, would help me in high school. She was always so good at breaking my math down so I understood it. Vaughn is the same way. I’m already piecing together how I’ll correct my assignment I’d been struggling with because some of the dots are beginning to connect finally.
We move from economics to business. He tells me about the different things that go into owning your own business. When he discusses marketing, I finally feel as though I can hold my own in the conversation. We discuss my father’s advertising firm. Turns out, he knows of my father. Jim brings us drink after drink.
“Fuck, it’s hot in here,” I groan as I grab the bottom of my hoodie and pull it over my head. As soon as it’s off and I toss it onto the seat beside me, I feel Vaughn’s heated stare on me. Our eyes meet and fire burns inside me.
I’m going to fuck this man.
Or, he’s going to fuck me.
Someone is getting fucked.
“I gotta take a piss,” Aiden says, his voice gravelly and almost lazy sounding.
I give him a clipped nod but don’t even have the ability to hide my blatant desire for him. He’d lost the hoodie and that was a big fucking mistake. His black T-shirt hugs his muscular chest and my dick’s been at attention ever since. When he slides out of the booth and stands, I rove my gaze over his muscular frame.
“Want me to take a picture so you have something to look at while I’m gone?” he teases, heat flaming in his steel-colored blue eyes.
“Smug ass,” I grunt in response.
He laughs and saunters away. My phone buzzes and I pick it up.
Vale: I’ve been doing some thinking. I think I’ll go stay with my sister.
My heart clenches in my chest. Are we really at this point? I mean, I’m in a bar lusting over my student when I should be fixing my marriage. But I don’t know how. I tried last night and we fell right back into the same pattern. She was crying after my shower last night and I couldn’t face her.
I’m unable to give her children.
That’s the big fucking wedge that has divided us.
Her resentment toward me is ever-present and my disappointment in myself makes my attitude suck. We’re no longer good together.
Me: I’d rather you not.
Really, Vaughn? I’d rather you not? That’s a shitty attempt to fight for your wife if I ever saw one.
Me: Baby, please. Don’t go to Tina’s. Just stay at home. We’ll talk tonight.
Vale: Our talking is no longer working. Nothing is working.
Me: I love you, though, Vale. We’re in a bad place, but we can get out of it.
Starting with not having a fucking date with my student.
Vale: I love you too, but it doesn’t change the fact we’ve drifted too far apart. A customer just came in. We can discuss this later.
I don’t respond and soon Aiden is back. His eyes are glassy from the alcohol. Kid isn’t even old enough to drink. What the fuck am I even doing?
“Who killed your cat? You look like you’re going to cry,” he jokes.
I grit my teeth and slam back the rest of my beer. “We’re done here. I need to sober up and get home.”
“We’re done?” he asks, hurt flashing in his expressive eyes.
Yes, I’m done with all this. A weak moment. I can’t go down this road, not if I’m trying to fix my marriage. I’m an asshole.
“Done.” I slap some cash down on the table. “When Jim comes back, pay the tab and I’ll run you back to campus.”
His eyes harden as I slide out of the booth and storm over to the bathroom. I stumble slightly and curse at myself for drinking too much. Once inside the bathroom, I piss and then wash my hands. I stare at my reflection and am haunted by the man staring back at me. I don’t know him. He’s unhappy as fuck. Someone killed the real Vaughn along the way.
Infertility.
I grit my teeth and turn on the cold water. Splashing my face, I try to sober up that way. It doesn’t work and I hang my head in shame. I shouldn’t be here with Aiden. I’m so fucked in the head.
The door opens and I turn to face off with the man who has my stomach in knots. He storms over to me, grabbing my shirt, and fists it before pushing me against the wall. His eyes flare with heat as his body presses against mine. Hard. Everywhere.
“We’re not over, Professor. We’re just beginning,” he growls.
I open my mouth to protest, but then his hot-as-fuck lips are on mine. Demanding and controlling. He kisses me, stealing a groan from me, and then his tongue is on mine. I’m stunned by his sudden kiss. Horrified even that I’m kissing someone other than Vale. I grip his T-shirt, infuriated at his forcing my hand like this. When I go to push him away, I learn he’s stronger than me. Stubborn bastard. His hips rub against mine and I moan, sounding like a needy prick. It feels too good to push him away. He tastes too good too. At some point, he manages to overpower me and our hips work in tandem to rub against each other. His dick is hard and aching as it rubs against mine, which is just as fucking eager. My hands are desperate and I grip his ass, urging him closer.
He bites my lip, hard and unrelenting. A growl escapes me as I tear from his kiss. His mouth, the greedy fuck, attacks my neck. He sucks my flesh between his teeth and I swear to hell I almost come. It feels that good.
And then it hits me.
If this fucker leaves a hickey on me, Vale will go fucking nuts. Everything she ever worried about will have come true. I push against his chest and shove him away.
“Stay the hell away from me,” I snarl, rage quickly replacing the lust burning through me.
He glowers at me. “You want this. Your marriage is over. You don’t have to say it, anybody can see that. There’s something between us and I’ll be damned if I ignore it.”
“Fuck you,” I snap. “You know nothing about me.”
He stalks forward. “I know your dick is hard for me.”
Anger explodes within me and I swing at him. My knuckles clip his cheekbone just below his eye and he stumbles back. Hurt flashes in his eyes. I feel like a fucking monster.
“Aiden,” I mutter, my fury quickly squelched.
He rubs at his face where I hit him and shakes his head. “No, man, I get it. Stay the fuck away. Duly noted.” When he starts for the door, I grip his shoulder.
“I’ll take you back to campus,” I g
rit out.
He looks at his watch. “I’m already late for work. I’ll walk.”
“You can’t go to work drunk,” I argue. “You’ll get fired.”
He sneers at me. “And you can’t make out with students either. You’ll get fired. Looks like we’re both shitty humans with no respect for the law. But don’t worry, your job is no longer in jeopardy. I’m out.”
As he leaves, I can’t help but feel as though I’ve fucked over yet one more person in my life who doesn’t deserve it.
Goddammit.
When the store empties out, I check my phone again and stare at Vaughn’s texts. Sometimes, when we talk through text, I feel like we say more than when we’re face to face. He wants me to stay. Yet, when we’re together, we barely speak to one another. Us having sex last night for the first time in four months felt like progress, but we slipped right back into the same old routines. It’s not just his fault. It’s mine too. As soon as we were naked, I was right back to all those months where we desperately tried to have children. I religiously stalked an infertility forum where those women were hard-core. I became hard-core too. They were my friends and talked me through every aspect of trying to have a baby.
I relied on them instead of him.
He was just a means to get what I wanted.
A baby.
Bitterness sours my belly. At first, he was so good and supportive over it all. He wanted a baby every bit as much as I did. Vaughn read the books. Took vitamins I forced down his throat. Had sex with me every time I said we had to. It was fun at first, stripping down and racing to the finish. I enjoyed how he’d sit with me, my ass on a pillow holding his sperm inside me, and plan all the names of our future children.
But it soon got old.
He grew agitated.
I was desperate.
What started out as fun became a point of contention between us. We’d fight about my desperation and his cool aloofness. Drift, drift, drift. It got to the point where he’d have sex with me, empty his seed, and then leave to go grade papers. We barely spoke. And then, after a meltdown when he suggested adoption, we stopped having sex altogether.
Until last night.
Last night was an opportunity to fix us. To start over. And I just became desperate once more. Prayed to God that this time, we’d stick. That we’d get pregnant and it would save our marriage because we’d be happy.
I twist my wedding ring around my finger and let out a sigh. We’ll never be happy again, I’m afraid. It’s too far gone. A year ago, I never looked at another man. Now, I get flustered and breathless whenever I’m in the same room with Aiden Blakely. I never saw myself as one to step out on my marriage, but most days, I feel like I’m the only one there playing house. Vaughn long ago left me. Mentally checked out of our marriage.
As if my thoughts summon him, the bell chimes at the front door. I peek my head out the door of the back kitchen to see Aiden storming into the shop. His dark brows are furled together in an angry way I’ve never seen and his hair is tousled as if he’s been running his fingers through it. It’s cold outside and yet he’s not wearing his hoodie. He has it looped around the strap of his messenger bag that’s across his chest.
“You’re late,” I observe as he stalks past me.
Odd. He’s always so friendly.
He tosses his stuff into my office chair and then crosses his arms over his chest. His cheeks and nose are red from the cold and his steely eyes blaze with emotion. Being under his heated gaze, I feel my heart rate speed up. I nervously bite on my bottom lip and lift a brow as if to ask him what’s wrong. But my throat is clogged and I don’t know that I can speak.
“Are you okay?” I manage to choke out.
His eyes narrow and he prowls my way, his hands falling to his sides as he approaches. Whatever is going on with him has caused him to make a decision. And that decision feels like it might be me. My skin heats at that thought and then guilt surges through me.
I’m not ready!
He stops just as our chests nearly touch. With my heavy breathing, my breasts brush against the hardness of him. I tilt my head up to look at him despite what a bad idea that is. His gaze softens as he regards me. Then he lifts a hand to tuck away a strand of my hair behind my ear.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, his voice husky and raw.
When was the last time I’ve heard that? Certainly not from Vaughn. Guilt splashes cold water on my heart and I look down, anything to get away from his eyes. His palm slides into my hair and he grips it against my skull. I let out a sharp gasp when he tilts my head back, his fiery gaze burning into me.
“I’m going to kiss you,” he tells me, his smug tone making my stomach flop.
“You can’t,” I breathe. “I’m married.”
He smirks. “No one said you had to kiss back.”
His full lips press to mine and I let out a surprised sound. He seems to take this as an invitation and sweeps his tongue across my lips. Heat burns through me from my lips all the way to my core and I grip the front of his T-shirt that molds to his sculpted physique.
“You taste like alcohol,” I murmur against his mouth.
“You taste like snickerdoodles,” he growls back.
I let out a small giggle because I’d eaten one before he came in. He nips at my bottom lip, silencing me. Then, he tugs on it with his teeth before trailing kisses along my jaw to my ear. When his teeth tug at my lobe, I let out a groan of pleasure.
Crap.
This is happening.
I should push him away. Make it stop.
He sucks on my flesh and I whimper. His palm goes to my ass and grips me, pulling at my cheek. It makes me feel exposed and realize how wet I’ve gotten from this heated kiss. We definitely have to stop. Vaughn and I may be headed for divorce, but we’re not there yet.
The bell chimes, indicating a customer, and I tense. “Aiden, I need to get out there.”
He sucks on my neck hard, making me cry out. “They can wait.”
“No, I—” I start but then hear someone curse.
“What the fuck?” a familiar voice roars. “What in the actual fuck?”
Aiden is ripped from me and is thrown against the island I used to roll out dough. A pan goes careening to the floor with a loud, deafening clatter. I stare horrified as my husband charges for Aiden again.
“No!” I cry out. “Vaughn, stop!”
He grabs ahold of Aiden’s throat and shoves him against a wall. Aiden throws a punch in Vaughn’s side, causing him to howl. They’re going to beat each other up and it’s all my fault.
“Vaughn,” I plead as I grab hold of the back of his shirt. “I’m sorry. I had a moment of weakness. We can talk this out.”
The muscles in his neck twitch with fury and then he turns his murderous gaze on me. I can smell the liquor on his breath, which confuses me. He should be at work. Not drunk and in my shop.
“How do you two know each other?” he seethes.
“He’s my employee. The one I told you about.”
His green eyes soften. “You never told me his name.”
Aiden grunts, but Vaughn doesn’t release him.
“I did,” I whisper. “You weren’t listening.”
“Did you tell her I’m your student?” Aiden hisses, hurt lacing his voice. “Did you tell her we got shitfaced and made out in a bar bathroom?”
Vaughn winces as the horror of his words sinks in.
“What?” I choke out. “I don’t understand.”
Vaughn releases Aiden and steps back, stumbling slightly as he runs his fingers through his hair. A purple mark is forming on his neck and I absently touch the spot Aiden was just kissing.
Aiden grits his teeth and straightens his shirt. “It appears I’ve been crushing on a fucking married couple.”
“You’re gay?” I ask at the same time Vaughn asks, “You’re straight?”
My husband and I share a shameful look.
“I’m bi,” Aiden snaps.
“It’s a thing.” He rubs at the back of his neck, shaking his head.
“Did you give him that?” I demand, my words shaking as I point at the hickey that’s forming on Vaughn’s neck. I knew back in college he’d been with guys and dated a few here and there before us. It never occurred to me he’d cheat on me with a man, though. In my head, all those late nights at the office were with some bimbo blond student.
Not this.
Not Aiden.
“We kissed and it got heated,” Aiden grunts. “Then, he got mad and I left.”
Vaughn shoots him a murderous glare. “And then you came to make out with my wife to get back at me.”
“I didn’t know she was your wife,” Aiden bites back. He implores me with his eyes. “I didn’t know.”
Vaughn’s stare grows soft and he looks so lost. Exactly how I feel. Aiden appears to be hurt as well. We just really made a mess of things. My husband and I cheated on each other with the same man. This is some Maury Povich stuff right here.
“I should go,” Aiden mutters, his brows furling together.
Vaughn grips his bicep, almost as if he can’t bear him to leave. Their eyes meet and heat blazes between them. Seeing that look on my husband’s face after so long makes my heart squeeze. Then, I realize it’s no longer for me.
“Don’t go,” I murmur, drawing both their attention.
Both men stare intently at me, as if I have the answers to this mess. I don’t, but I know sending Aiden away isn’t going to fix anything. If anything, we need to talk about this.
“You’re both clearly drunk. We’ll close the shop early, take some coffee with us so you can sober up, and talk about this at the house over dinner. The three of us.” I bite on my lip. Both men watch the action with similar expressions. Want. It urges me forward. “We’re clearly in this together and the only way to sort through it is together. If Vaughn and I were both kissing you, there’s something clearly broken about our marriage.”
“Me,” Aiden says bitterly. “I’m the one breaking it.”
Vaughn turns and regards him, his thumb gently brushing over Aiden’s bicep. “We were already broken. You didn’t break anything.” Vaughn turns to me. “Right?”