by Webster, K
“Sure,” I say and smile his way.
When I turn to regard Quinn, he’s watching me warily. Fuck, this man doesn’t trust easily.
“Aiden says you’re his professor,” he says bluntly.
At least I know where Aiden gets his no-nonsense personality. Always gets straight to the point. Difference with Aiden and Quinn is that Aiden delivers it in a softer manner. Quinn is all edges and scowls.
“I am. I teach both macro and microeconomics.”
He nods and walks over to a cabinet that houses liquor. I’m thankful to have something to take the edge off. He pours some brandy into two tumblers and hands me one.
“Aiden is a good kid,” he says.
“A good man,” I correct.
A frown wrinkle forms between his brows. “Don’t remind me I’m getting old.”
I chuckle. “Just telling it like it is.”
He lets out a heavy sigh before sipping from his drink. “He and I had a long talk last night. He told me about your problems.”
Shame courses through me. Each day that passes, I realize more and more that I was so weak to let my marriage nearly fall apart.
“Everyone has problems,” he says. “My first wife and I couldn’t get past ours. Had fifteen years of marriage not drained away, I would’ve never found Ava.”
I nod, refusing to interrupt him when he doesn’t, at present, look like he wants to kick my ass.
“Did Aiden tell you how we met?”
I arch a brow. “No, but something tells me it’s a good story considering she’s not much older than your sons, right?”
He laughs and right then he looks just like Aiden. “She was their babysitter. Barely legal. She had me all kinds of fucked in the head.”
I smirk at him. “But she was the one.”
“She was the one,” he repeats, smiling fondly. “You know of that. You found the one.”
My smile fades. “I did. She’s still the one. But we…” I drain my glass and set it down on the table. “We were on the brink of divorce.”
“Divorce?”
“My buddy Dane drew up the papers and everything.”
He grins. “You know Dane Alexander?”
“Who doesn’t know Dane Alexander?” I joke. “He’s a good guy. Known him for years. Asshole tried to talk me out of getting a divorce. What kind of divorce lawyer does that?”
He chuckles. “A shitty one.”
“It was your son who made me tear the papers up,” I admit. “He was so adamant about us staying together. He didn’t want us to break apart, certainly not over him.”
Quinn scowls, but pride flickers in his eyes. “He has a good head on his shoulders.”
He pours us both more to drink. I can hear laughter and babies squealing from the kitchen. I think it’s safe to say everything is going okay in there. I’m the one charged with calming the beast of the house.
“We tried. For a while there, before I took the step to have Dane draw up divorce papers, we took Aiden’s advice and tried to work on our marriage. But we were too far gone,” I say sadly. I sip the brandy and let out a sigh. “We slipped back into old routines.”
“And my son helped you find your way again?”
“Yeah. We feel stronger than ever. But truth is, if he were to walk away right now, I’d be plagued with worry that we wouldn’t last without him.” I frown at my admission. “Sorry, man, didn’t mean to unload.”
“So he’s just something to hold you together.”
I lift my gaze from my tumbler to stare him right in his eyes. “He’s not something to us. He’s everything.”
When we’re all seated around the table, I take a moment to look at Aiden’s twin. To me they look exactly the same and nothing alike. It’s their mannerisms that make them different. Now that I’ve met Anthony, I can tell he’s the one who’s the most like their father. He has his father’s suspicious glare down pat. His fiancée, on the other hand, is bubbly and always smiling. Sometimes when he’s simply glaring at me, she swats at him, whispers something in his ear, and has him grinning in a way that makes him look exactly like his handsome twin.
The real gem at the table, though, is Ava. She’s quirky and a little on the nerdy side, but it’s fascinating to watch the big, growly Quinn Blakely submit to her every whim. His eyes only ever leave hers to check on their adorable toddlers. I’ve seen the same intensity in Aiden’s gaze before, which has a thrill shooting through me. I knew Aiden was into this polyamorous relationship with us, but verifying it by seeing it in another viewpoint with how his father regards his stepmother is a whole new perspective I can appreciate.
And Vale?
She’s died and gone to baby heaven. The baby, June, sits on my wife’s lap and tugs at her chunky necklaces as she tries to eat them. Vale has kissed that baby’s head no less than fifty times since dinner started. I don’t think she’s even touched her food.
Guilt niggles at me.
I’ll never be able to give her this.
As if in tune with my sudden mood change, Aiden leans in. “You okay?”
“Of course,” I say lightly, despite the gruffness hiding in my tone.
He pats my thigh and then starts talking to his brother about website design. I tune them out to watch Vale. Her smile is bright but fake. To all these people, she’s happy. But I’ve seen the defeated look in her pretty green eyes before. Something she wants so badly is the very thing she cannot have. It nearly destroyed us.
Fuck, if I could give her a baby, I would’ve done it eight years ago.
When Vale’s gaze falls to June’s head and she doesn’t look up again, I know she’s fighting tears. Since we’ve all finished up, I figure we should leave.
“I think we’re going to head out,” I say to everyone. “She won’t admit it, but my wife has a migraine.”
She shoots me a thankful look. “I’ll be fine,” she says lamely. “Besides, we can’t leave them with this mess.”
Stephanie, Anthony’s fiancée, scoffs. “Nonsense, honey. Get out of here and take care of that migraine. We’ll put Anthony on dishes. Right, baby?”
He rolls his eyes but pulls her hand to him so he can kiss her knuckle over her engagement ring. “If that makes you happy, teacup.”
She beams at him. “It’s settled then. You guys go home. It was wonderful finally meeting you all.”
Everyone says their goodbyes and Aiden follows us out. Vale gets inside the car while Aiden and I stare after her.
“She okay?”
I let out a sigh. “Nope.”
“I’m coming over. Let me grab a bag.” He gives my shoulder a squeeze and runs back inside.
A huge weight lifts from my shoulders. Normally, I try to pull her out of these dark moments on my own and almost always I fuck it up. But Aiden? He’s a natural. I’m thankful as hell he’s coming with us. In less than five minutes he trots back out and takes my keys.
“I’m driving,” he says with an easy grin.
He’s been driving this relationship since the moment we opened the door to our marriage and let him in. “Thank you.”
His eyes meet mine and understanding dawns in his eyes.
I’ll never be able to thank him enough for how he’s able to reach inside her and distract her from what we’ll never have.
They’re tag teaming me.
Emotion clogs my throat as I excuse myself to the bathroom once we’re home. I can hear them chatting in low voices in the bedroom while I hide out from them. When I think about Aiden’s little sister June and her twin brothers Jayden and Joseph, a deep, heavy ache settles in the pit of my belly.
Envy.
I’m envious of Quinn’s cute little wife, Ava, and her ability to pop out children left and right. I just want one. I want one baby to hold and call mine. I’m not that greedy. Vaughn says we can adopt—that he’d love to if that’d make me happy—but I’ve never pulled the trigger on that decision. It makes me a horrible person, but I don’t want to adopt. I
t’s more heartache and waiting and stress. There is no easy answer.
I sit on the edge of the bathtub as tears roll down my cheeks. Now that the dam has been broken, they won’t stop. Shame fills me for so many reasons. Aiden will get to see the real me. The me who obsesses over what she can’t have. The me who destroys her own relationships because of one thing that consumes her so fully.
I’ll push him away too.
It’s what I do.
“You okay in there, beautiful?” Aiden asks from the door.
I choke on a sob. “Yep.”
“Big fat liar.”
A laugh escapes me through my tears.
“Open the door, Vale.”
“In a minute,” I utter.
“Now.”
“I’m pooping.”
He snorts. “You’re not pooping. Let me in.”
There’s no hiding. I’m sure Vaughn filled him in on every gory detail of what a terribly obsessed person I am over infertility. I just can’t let go of it. No matter how hard I try.
“Now.”
I let out an exasperated sigh and stand. I turn the lock and start to back away, but he swings the door open, prowling over to me. I expect Vaughn to join the party, but he doesn’t come inside. I’m thankful not to have them both glaring down at me.
“You’re so pretty when you cry,” he murmurs, swiping his thumb across my cheek. “But I don’t like it. I prefer your smiles, beautiful.”
A smile breaches my face. “You’re distracting.”
“Come here and let me distract you some more.”
His palms find my ass and he pulls me to him. I let out a sigh as he kisses me gently. Then, he rests his forehead on mine. “It’s okay to be sad. It’s a sad thing.”
Tears well in my eyes again as I nod. “I’m sorry.”
He scowls. “What in the hell would you ever have to be sorry for?”
“It won’t go away,” I choke out. “Something like this doesn’t just go away. That sense of failure follows me around like a fog.” More tears leak out and his eyes track them down my cheeks.
“Baby,” he says softly. “Our pain is what defines us. I’m not sure you’d be the deep, emotional, vulnerable soul you are without it. I like all the parts of you. Even those jagged not-so-pretty ones.”
“You do?”
He nods. “And guess what?”
“What?”
“He does too.”
The he in question appears in the doorway. Concern is written all over his features. I do what I should have done over and over again all these years. I go to him and let him hold me. Vaughn is stiff at first, but then he squeezes me tight.
He never wanted to fix me. He just wanted to hold all the broken parts of me so I wouldn’t lose myself.
When I feel Aiden’s heat behind me as he sandwiches me between them, I relax. The hurt and heartache melts away as I let these two men keep me together. We remain locked in this position for a long time. The only thing that can be heard is our rhythmic breathing and the clock ticking on the bathroom wall.
At some point, the bathroom becomes warm. I tilt my head up and meet the loving stare of my husband. His fingers thread into my hair and he kisses me deeply. Apologies and heartache and hope all rolled into one kiss. I cling to him desperately. Behind me, Aiden slides my hair to the side and starts to kiss the side of my neck. I let out a breathy mewl that has both men hardening against me.
Vaughn breaks away but clutches onto my hands as he walks us backward into the bedroom. When he reaches the bed, he unbuttons his shirt and sheds it. As he undresses, Aiden holds me to him. The moment Vaughn is fully naked, he steps forward and starts removing my clothes. Behind me, I can hear Aiden getting undressed as well.
“Lie down,” Vaughn instructs. “We want to take care of you.”
I bite down on my bottom lip and search both their expressions. No resentment or annoyance. The same heated, protective look shines in both their eyes. Obeying my husband, I sit down on the bed and lie back.
“Spread your legs so we can see your perfect pussy, Vale,” Vaughn murmurs.
A cool draft of air hits the part of me that aches with need. Aiden’s eyes become wolfish as he follows Vaughn’s stare to my pussy.
“We never got dessert,” Aiden muses aloud, his lips quirking up on one side. “I’m hungry. How about you?”
Vaughn’s grin is nearly evil. “I was craving something sweet. Want to share?”
Both my evil boys smile down at me as they stare at me like I’m the finest meal they’ll ever have. A shiver of part desire, part apprehension shudders down me. As much as we’ve fucked and messed around, they haven’t done this together. I’m curious as to how it will go down.
Vaughn kneels and Aiden mimics his action. They each grab one of my knees and spread me farther apart. I sit up on my elbows so I can watch them. Vaughn kisses my clit and then Aiden leans in to run his tongue along my slit. I let out a gasp.
Vaughn winks at me but instead of diving back in, he turns to kiss Aiden. Their kiss is ravenous as they devour the other. It turns me on and I can’t help but reach between my thighs to relieve some of the ache that throbs to my core. Aiden pushes my hand away, causing me to grumble. Both men chuckle as they break their kiss. Aiden starts kissing along my inner thigh where Vaughn has taken to nipping my flesh with his teeth on the other side. They’re teasing me everywhere except the place that practically drips in desperation for them.
Aiden climbs onto the bed as Vaughn settles on the floor between my thighs. They kiss again, right over my pussy, but before I complain, they start kissing me there. I let out a loud gasp of air when their tongues fight to tease my clit. Two tongues swirling and lashing at my most sensitive place at once has me squirming on the bed. Since Aiden’s on the bed with me, he uses his strong arm to pin my lower half to keep me from moving.
“She’s so sweet,” Aiden praises, his hot breath sending my senses haywire.
“So sweet,” Vaughn agrees.
Then I feel someone’s teeth. Oh God. Aiden’s tongue wins the battle for my clit as Vaughn seeks out other areas to pleasure me. When his tongue pushes against my entrance, I let out a moan.
“This feels so good,” I croak out. I grab at my tits, desperate to take out my ecstasy on something.
Aiden sucks on my clit as Vaugh starts fucking my hole with his tongue. It’s too much. Too intense. They’re going to drive me crazy. It doesn’t take long until I’m screaming and thrashing in pleasure. They assault my senses until tears are leaking from my eyes. Too much pleasure. Too intense.
“Oh my God,” I rasp out when they finally pull away. “That was amazing.”
“About damn time,” Aiden says, laughing. “I knew I was better than good at something.”
Vaughn chuckles as he stands. He affectionately squeezes Aiden’s shoulder before pointing to the bed. “Vale,” my husband says, gaining my attention. “I want you to ride this good-looking man’s cock.”
We shuffle around and before I slide over Aiden’s cock, I look at Vaughn. He lifts a brow and follows my gaze to the open drawer. His hand reaches in but instead of grabbing the condoms, he grabs the lube. My eyes dart to his. He gives me a small nod of his approval. When I look down at Aiden, he’s smiling at me.
“I’m clean,” he assures me. “When I found out my last girlfriend was fucking around on me, I went ahead and got myself checked out.”
“I’m not on the pill,” I remind him. Not that I can get pregnant anyway.
“We’re not going to hope or dream for something we can’t control,” Aiden murmurs, his palm sliding around the back of my neck. He pulls me close until our lips are nearly touching. “No more obsessing. You’ll let us distract you, right?”
Our lips fuse together as I rub against his naked cock.
“Words, Vale. I need your promise.”
“I promise.”
He grabs my hips and I easily slide down his length. It feels so much better without a co
ndom.
“Attention here,” Aiden growls. “I need your eyes and complete focus. I’m going to have to talk you through this.”
Panic makes me shudder as the bed dips behind me. The popping of the cap of the lube bottle has me jolting.
“Baby,” Vaughn murmurs as he gives my ass an affectionate squeeze. “I would never hurt you. You tell us to stop and that’s the end.”
“Okay,” I breathe. “I want to try this.”
For weeks now, they’ve taken turns fingering me with three and four fingers. Stretching me. Readying me for this moment. But I’m nervous. Vaughn’s tongue was just inside me and that felt like a stretch. The vagina is a fascinating part of human anatomy that it can grow to accommodate up to ten centimeters. It’s by some divine design that it can shrink back to its original size.
At least that’s what I keep telling myself.
“What if it doesn’t go back?” I say in a moment of panic.
Both of the men caress me, but it’s Aiden who assures me.
“I’ve done this before. Trust me, baby, it goes back.”
His mouth attacks mine and I let him kiss me dizzy. Vaughn rubs his slippery dick along my ass crack but that’s not where he’s going.
“Relax,” Aiden says against my mouth. “Let him in.”
I nod and Vaughn gives me another loving squeeze on my ass. When I feel Vaughn’s fingers slip inside me beside Aiden’s dick, I let out a moan. His fingers tease me as Aiden remains absolutely still. As soon as my husband removes his fingers, I feel a loss.
I want this.
I want them both.
“We’re doing this,” Vaughn rasps out as the crown of his cock tries to find a point of entry beside Aiden’s massive cock.
I kiss Aiden to distract myself from the fear of something bad happening. But Vaughn is slowly easing in and caressing my ass in a reverent way. Aiden grips my hair and looks intently in my eyes.
“Let him in,” he urges.
Vaughn grunts from behind me. The stretching burns, but it’s not awful. I dig my nails into Aiden’s shoulders.
“Vaughn,” he barks out in warning.