I swing my legs over the edge of the bed. Then I remember. Mom went to Mona’s.
Not for the first time I realize that there are just a handful of people I can rely on. A handful of people I can talk to or ask advice from. Our whole family left us hung out to dry when Mom’s fits started. I was always so happy that I at least had my parents. Then Dad vanished. It was hard, but I had my friends, and we had Mona. Now, I can’t even trust my best friends anymore. I made some new ones, but they’re all ghosts.
I slam my head against my pillow a couple of times. Why is the world so complicated? Just when I thought I got the hang of life, it threw a magical world at me. ‘Here’s a bunch of ghosts. Take them. It’s a present. Oh, and would you like a touch of demon to go with them? Trust me, they’re great fun.’
I kick the bedpost with my foot. A sharp pain shoots through my toe and I yell in frustration. “I hate this life.”
Tears push through and drip on my shirt.
“Enough with the self-pity,” a familiar voice says from the doorway.
I look up. No one’s there. “Shut up. You don’t know what it feels like to face everything alone.”
A chortle. “Trust me, I know exactly what that feels like.”
“Yeah right.” I straighten up and wipe my face with the back of my hand. “You’re a what? An angel, or something?”
There’s a surprised silence.
“I’m an angel, yes.”
“So after lecturing me and maybe a few others, you go back to…” I wave vaguely towards the ceiling, “up there, and have a bit of a laugh with the other angels.”
“Actually, that’s not how it works.”
“So enlighten me. Tell me how it works.” I cross my arms. “I’m so sick of all these secrets. All these things out of movies that turn out to be real. What else is real? And why do I have to save this Mr. Timson? Plenty of other guys available to do that. Braver, stronger and older guys.”
“That’s not how it works.”
I lift my chin in defiance, like a six-year-old refusing to accept it’s time for bed. “You keep saying that. That’s not an explanation.”
“I know it isn’t, Dante, and I’m sorry. There’s not much I can tell you. You have to discover things on your own.”
“Then point me in the right direction.”
“That’s what I’m doing.”
I snort. “You’ve got a lot to learn, angel. I’m guessing you never played Clue.”
“Oh, but I did. It’s a pretty good game. You only get the clues you need. You have to connect the dots yourself. Just like in real life.”
I clench my hands into fists. “Yes, but in real life monsters are trying to kill me. So a few extra clues wouldn’t hurt.” My voice rises at the end of the sentence. I feel like throwing something against the wall. Maybe through his face. If only I could see him.
I hear him breathing calmly. I know he is watching me.
“This is why I can’t tell you more. Among other reasons.”
“What does that mean? What is ‘this’?”
“You’re angry at the world and everyone in it, Dante. You’ll have to learn how to cope with all this new information, before you’re ready to know more.”
I open my mouth to argue, but he’s not finished.
“It’s perfectly understandable. I was human once. It took me a long time to accept that my life was over and I had a new purpose.”
My mouth almost falls open. “You were human once? What did you look like? What was your name?”
Another silence.
My jaw sets. “Oh, right, you can’t tell me. What was I thinking?”
“You’re stronger than you think, Dante. Trust your own strength and that of your Shield. You will be fine.”
I shake my head. “That’s easy for you to say.” Sadness drives away my anger again. I just want to roll up and hide under the covers, preferably with a cup of hot chocolate. Or something stronger.
I feel utterly alone. And when the voice doesn’t respond, I know that I actually am.
CHAPTER 28
After bawling my eyes out, I take a long shower. It clears my head a bit. I realize I should call Charlie. So that’s the first thing I do when I’m dressed.
He sounds like his cheery old self, which stings badly. “Hey man, how’s life in boring old Blackford?”
Not so boring, I want to answer, but I don’t. “Fine. How’s Italy?”
“Beautiful. We should go together some time.”
“Right.” I stop at my desk and peer outside without seeing anything. “So… I saw you the other day. And I’m pretty sure I wasn’t in Italy.” No point in beating around the bush any longer.
Silence answers me. This seems to be the way my conversations are going these days.
“Oh…” he finally says.
“Yeah, oh. So tell me the truth. Please.” I try to sound stern, but a hint of grief seeps through.
“I-”
I interrupt him faster than a golden snitch unfolding its wings. “Don’t say you can’t tell me. I’m sick of that.”
“But-”
“I thought we were friends, Charlie. What happened? Why can’t you tell me what’s going on?”
“I’m not sure you’re ready to hear this. To… understand this.”
“Oh, come on.” I slam my hand onto my desk. Papers fly everywhere and my hand throbs painfully. “I wish people would stop feeding me that crap. I’m not ten you know.”
“Someone else has been telling you the same thing? Who?” He sounds surprised.
“I… I can’t tell you.”
“Well, how ironic.”
I let out a deep sigh. “Just tell me one thing, Charlie. Can I trust you?”
His answer comes without hesitation. “Yes.”
“How do I know?”
“You’ve trusted me for years. Why did you?”
“Because I knew you. Or I thought I did. Turns out I didn’t know you, or Paul, for that matter.”
His breath catches in his throat. “You saw him, too?”
“Yes, you twerp, you were following him.”
“Ah… yes, I was. I had my reasons.”
“Tell me about them.”
“I can’t, Dante, not until I’m sure. I don’t want to accuse our friend of something he didn’t do.”
“What do you think he did?”
He sighs. “Stop fishing. Please. I can’t tell you yet.”
For a few seconds neither of us knows what to say.
Then Charlie speaks up again. “Did you see what Paul was doing?”
“He was following Mr. Timson.”
“Who?”
I don’t know why I said that. It just slipped out. I’m so used to telling Charlie everything, that I have to think about every word I say.
“Mr. Timson. Don’t tell me you don’t know him.”
“Is that the man who lives in the house Paul went into?”
Okay, so maybe Charlie doesn’t know anything about Mr. Timson.
“It is.”
“And how do you know his name?”
That’s a good question. I can tell him I looked it up, but it feels wrong to lie to Charlie, even though I’m not sure if he can be trusted. I guess old habits die hard. “I can’t tell you.”
“Well, I guess this conversation is over then.”
“I guess it is.”
He hangs up before I can say another word.
I fling the phone across the room. It hits the wall and falls in pieces on the wet floor. I let out a curse and pick it up. There’s a crack in the screen. “Great, I didn’t feel bad enough already.”
I put the battery back in and push the on-button. The screen flashes to life and I let out a sigh of relief.
For a moment I consider calling Paul. But I decide not to. I’m ninety-nine percent sure I can’t trust him. And I don’t know if I can count on my other friend
s anymore, either. Quinn and Simon might have been lying to me, too.
After a couple of minutes of thinking, I decide to send them a message. How are the girls on Ibiza? Do they kiss better than Blackford girls? I type to Quinn. Send me a picture of the view.
My message to Simon is even shorter. How’s the weather there? Send me a pic of your tan.
If they don’t answer, I know something’s not right.
While scrolling through my short contact list, Rodney’s DIY catches my eye.
I slap my hand against my forehead. I forgot all about him. He’s coming to fit the new door in Darkwood Manor.
I sprint out of the front door and hop into my car. That last bit doesn’t go very well, since the curb is empty. I must look like an idiot, standing there with my hand reaching for a non-existing car door. I slap myself again. My head is starting to hurt.
I walk back to Darkwood Manor as fast as my exhausted body is willing to go. Since I don’t feel like following the winding pavement all the way around the houses on Blueberry Lane, I walk on the grass strip in the middle of the road.
Mrs. Delaney opens her front door and yells, “Get off the grass.”
I give her an apologetic wave and walk on.
My feet hurt when I reach Darkwood Manor. Phoenix is still parked out front. Rodney’s red four by four is standing next to it. He’s still in it, looking apprehensively at the house. I walk up to his window and knock gently. He jumps so hard he hits his head against the car ceiling.
“What’s wrong?” I ask when he steps out.
He shivers. “It’s just this house. It gives me the creeps.” He walks to the back of the car and loosens the rope holding the windows in place. “I thought it had been taken down years ago.”
“Maybe it should have. It’s a bit of a mess,” I comment. Then I notice the glass in the back of his car. “Hey, you’ve got the glass already too!”
“Yeah.” Rodney stares at the windows. “I don’t want to sound like someone out of a corny horror movie, but it feels like this place is watching me. Besides, have you heard the stories?”
“No, tell me.”
He lifts the first piece of glass on his shoulder and walks to the first window. “Some other time. I want this done as soon as possible.” He looks at me over his shoulder. “Would you mind removing these boards?”
I want to slap my forehead again, but I’m able to contain myself just in time. “Sure, just a minute.”
I rush inside.
“Don’t you lock your door?” Rodney shouts at me, which reminds me of the locks I got yesterday.
I pick up my tools from the empty kitchen and hurry back to the front of the house. “I didn’t have time to install the new locks yet.” I need all of my strength to remove the nails from the boards, but I don’t mind. It’s good to do something physical. I would love to tear down a wall right now. Or a whole house.
“I’d offer to do it for you, but… you know.” He nods at the dark windows upstairs.
“It’s fine. I can manage.”
While I remove the other boards, Rodney places the glass. Still, there’s no sign of the Shield. I’m starting to worry if they made it back here. I know they can’t leave the house without me, but I assumed they could get back without my help. What if I was wrong?
I drop my hammer. “I have to check on something.”
Upstairs I call out. “Vicky? Jeep?”
There’s no answer.
“D’Maeo? Taylar! Maël!”
My voice rises in panic.
“Guys? Are you okay? I’m sorry I left you.”
Oh please, please, don’t be gone.
I swallow hard and turn around. When I reach the stairs, Vicky is standing at the bottom. Relief floods over me, but is soon replaced by an uncomfortable feeling. I shuffle my feet. What am I supposed to say to her?
“Hi,” is what I settle for after an awkward silence.
She smiles gently at me.
“Is everyone okay?” I whisper.
She nods. “We’re fine. If you leave us outside for too long, we automatically return to Darkwood Manor.” She wipes a strand of black hair out of her face. “We were trying to find out more about the ice demon that attacked us here.”
“Oh… good…” I grab the banister and sway back and forth like a little kid giving a presentation in school. “Did you find anything useful?”
She opens her mouth, but before any sound comes out, Rodney appears in the doorway. “Did you find what you were looking for?” he asks, clearly staying as far away from the door as he can without looking like a total coward.
I try to look at him through Vicky’s body, but it makes my insides squirm, so I lean sideways a bit and look past her. Rodney glances over his shoulder.
“Yeah, I found it.”
“Great. Can you give me a hand then?”
“Sure thing.”
I hop down the stairs, move past Vicky, which provokes another frown from Rodney, and join him on the front lawn. “Tell me what to do.”
CHAPTER 29
I successfully avoid talking to Vicky about our kiss. After Rodney makes a hasty departure, I install the locks. The Shield is still searching for information about the ice demon, so I’m happy to leave them to it and return home. I’m still exhausted, so I’m grateful that Phoenix decides to cooperate. As soon as I get home, I heat up some soup from the freezer and crawl under the covers. After watching two movies and speaking to Mom for a few minutes – who’s having the time of her life -, I close my eyes and think about premonitions. I tell my brain to create one over and over again. I try to imagine what the dream would be like, thinking only happy thoughts. Finally I fall asleep.
There is a dream, but I don’t remember any of it when I jerk awake. My eyes scan the room. It looks like I’m still alone. There’s nothing at the window and when I check the bathroom, it’s empty.
I take a hot shower and go over the plans for today. After washing my hair I realize I don’t have much of a plan at all.
I get dressed, snatch Dad’s notebook from the ground where I must have dropped it, take an apple and drive to Darkwood Manor.
For the first time I open the door using a key. It feels a bit like coming home.
“Hello? Are you guys back yet?”
Which is a stupid question, because they can’t leave the house without me.
There’s no answer. They must still be busy.
“Okay, I’ll leave you alone a while longer then,” I yell.
I go to the first floor and enter the cold, dusty bedroom that’s supposed to be mine. I look around and run my hand through my hair. “What a mess.”
I drop the notebook on the bed and search the house for a dustpan and broom. I smile when I find a closet full of cleaning products in the hallway just outside my bedroom. I take the dustpan, broom and a garbage bag. It takes me a while to clean up the room. There are wood splinters everywhere and more dust than you’ll find at the junkyard. I throw away the stained sheets and look down on the mattress and bed for a second. “It will have to do for now.” I put on clean sheets I find in another closet.
With my hands on my hips, I examine the results. “Now all it needs is some paint and a picture on the wall.”
I nod to myself, and flop down on the bed. It creaks in protest, but holds my weight. Images of my first time in this room flood back to me. Vicky touching my arm, me mesmerized by her eyes. I push the memory to the back of my mind. I need to focus on my job.
The notebook in my hand has been calling to me ever since I closed it and flung it through the room. At the same time, I’m dreading to read Dad’s words. But they might help us save the world, so what choice do I have?
I don’t want to see those awful drawings again, so I start at the beginning.
I was followed today. I’m not sure if it was human. It walked like a person, but it emanated something… dark. I could have used my power, but I kn
ew somehow that I wasn’t strong enough to fight this thing.
If only I didn’t have to deal with this stupid curse. I would be so much stronger. It’s boiling inside me, getting stronger every day. I have to leave. But I can’t. Susan and Dante are the only good things in my life. How can I survive without them? If I just watch over them, we’ll be fine. I can fight this curse, I know I can.
I swallow hard. Dad was cursed. That’s why darkness got ahold of him. But he didn’t want to leave us.
Without my permission, my gaze wanders back to the page. My eyes have a will of their own, while my heart protests with loud beats. The words hit me hard.
I hit her today. Susan. My lovely Susan. She was having one of her fits. Screaming at me, growling like a monster. For a moment, I saw her face change into that of a demon. I hit her before I could stop myself. Rage burned in my fists. I knew what I saw wasn’t real. My mind was just playing tricks on me again. But my body reacted instinctively. And the worst thing was… I wanted to keep hitting her. Just hit her until she couldn’t get up again. Smack her until the fits stopped.
That’s all I want. Just for it to stop. All of it. Live a peaceful life again, with my wife and son. Not worry about monsters and people trying to destroy the world.
But I can’t. I have a responsibility. I got my power for a reason.
I can’t think about myself any longer. I have to fight for the world. For Susan and Dante. For everyone.
There’s movement in the corner of my eye and I slam the book shut.
“Hi,” Vicky says. She looks a bit shy.
“Hi,” I reply, by lack of something better to say.
A tear escapes my eye and I wipe it away quickly.
Vicky shoots me a concerned look. “Are you okay?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Things have been pretty heavy lately.”
I feel the weight of the mattress shift as Vicky sits on the edge. “I can understand that. I knew what it felt like once, but that was a long time ago.” She twirls a black-and-blonde string of hair around her finger. “I’m sorry… about before…”
The First Demon (Cards of Death Book 1) Page 19