The front door opened and Eve hoped beyond hope that it would be Ethan. Instead it was Sierra. She, Kylie and Eve had once been roommates. They’d had other roommates along the way but the three of them had been fixtures at the ranch since almost the beginning. Now it was just Sierra and Eve. They shared the main living area of the one-time garage turned apartment building but they each had their own bedroom, bathroom and sitting area.
Sierra looked from Kylie to Eve to the baby and froze, her eyes going wide. “No.”
She walked on to the kitchen with just that word but as she poured a cup of coffee, she shook her head. “Nope.”
“You don’t have a choice and neither does Eve. For the time being you have a new roommate.” Kylie shot Sierra a warning look. “And you’ll love her.”
“I don’t think so. Babies smell, they cry, they need constant attention. Why is she here? Is there something you haven’t told us, Eve?” Sierra wandered into the living room with her coffee. She stared down at the baby on Eve’s lap and shook her head again. “It’s cute, but I guarantee you, it won’t be cute for long. They’re like puppies. They grow up.”
“You’re horrible,” Kylie said. “And the baby is a she, not an it.”
“I’m horrible but I’m honest about babies.” Sierra grinned at their ex-roommate, her expression softening. “I’m the person who never pets the cute puppies you all raise. I don’t go all dewy eyed over a new foal. I told you the truth when Cara was born. Everyone else lied. She wasn’t the prettiest baby ever. I mean, she’s pretty now, but that first day, not so cute. She was red, wrinkled and cried a lot.”
“But you’ll help Eve if she needs it?” Kylie prodded.
Sierra sat down next to Kylie and eventually she nodded. “Because we’re friends, I’ll help you out, Eve. But where in the world did this little bundle of joy come from?”
“From my past,” Eve said. She avoided eye contact with her friends because any hint of sympathy would bring tears.
“She showed up on our doorstep? Or did you find her under a cabbage leaf? You’re killing me here.” Sierra stretched her legs, grimacing just a bit at the movement.
“She’s the daughter of friends,” Eve started and then she told the rest of the story, managing to hold it together. As she spoke, she found herself holding Tori a little closer.
“Wow,” Sierra said quietly. “That’s a lot, Eve. I am sorry.”
“Me, too.”
“You had a fiancé,” Sierra said after a moment.
“Yes, I had a fiancé.”
“And you’ve misplaced him again?” Sierra teased.
“I didn’t misplace him. I gave him an out. And this time, he took the out.”
“This is way more reality than I like to deal with on a Monday afternoon,” Sierra said as she stood, grabbing her coffee cup off the end table. “I’ll help when I can but Jack has me busy with this lovely wedding chapel idea of his.”
Eve laughed at that. “You’re such a romantic, you’ll make a great wedding planner.”
“Yeah, well, right now, being a wedding planner is far more appealing than changing dirty diapers. You have fun with that and I’ll see you all later.”
Eve pressed her lips to Tori’s head, amazed that in a few short hours she’d found it so easy to love one small child.
Until Ethan returned, Eve would manage to care for Tori. She would give the little girl all the love and hugs she could, not that it would make up for the loss of her parents. But Ethan would return, he had to. When he did, Eve would explain that she just couldn’t be a part of parenting Tori full-time.
* * *
Tuesday morning Ethan followed his GPS to Mercy Ranch, just a few miles outside Hope and a ninety-minute drive from Tulsa. He pulled up to the main house, a two-story log home with plenty of windows, big covered porches and a yellow Labrador sprawled out in a flower bed. A man walked down off the back porch, pulling his hat low as he headed in Ethan’s direction.
Ethan got out of his truck, grabbing his hat from the backseat as he did. When he turned around, the other man stood just feet away. He was close to Ethan in age with a jagged scar on the left side of his face and steel-gray eyes that could nail a man to the wall.
“Good morning,” Ethan greeted.
“I’m guessing you’re the missing fiancé? Or should I say, AWOL fiancé?” The man spoke without a lot of warmth in his voice.
“Ex-fiancé, and I’m not the one who went missing. I knew where I was the whole time.” Ethan kept his tone casual. No reason to make enemies here.
“You’re brave, I’ll give you that,” the man said as he tipped his hat back a bit. A slow grin slid across his face. “Name’s Isaac West.”
Ethan held out a hand. “Name’s Mud. But you can call me Ethan. Ethan Forester.”
Isaac West chuckled. “You got the first part right. She’s madder than a wet hornet right now.”
“But she survived.”
“Yeah, she did. But not if you ask her. My fiancée, Rebecca, went down to check on her a bit ago. From what I’ve been told, there was more formula on her and the counter than in the baby. And she might have been wearing bananas on her shirt.”
“Maybe I should rethink going down there?”
“I think if you try to leave, she will hunt you down and hurt you. But I can walk you down there, if you’d like. Safety in numbers and all that.”
Ethan wouldn’t call himself weak. He’d been on some pretty rank horses, ridden bulls, and he’d even back-talked his mama. That last one had proved to be more stupid than brave.
“If you want to show me where to find her,” he said in accepting the offer, “I wouldn’t be opposed.”
Isaac pounded him on the back in good-natured camaraderie. “You got it.”
The ranch was a sprawling place, clean with good fences, cattle and horses grazing in the fields, a nice stable and several residences. In the corral near the stable he could see men working with horses. A short distance away, it appeared a new stable was being built.
Isaac followed his interested gaze and chuckled. “Wedding venue. It’s going to look like a stable. The main area will be the chapel, the indoor ‘arena’ will be for receptions. My dad guesses it’ll keep a few of the residents busy with managing, cleaning and catering.”
“This is quite a setup. I’m impressed.”
Isaac shrugged at the compliment. “It was all Jack. He’s the idea man. He keeps everyone busy and moving, even if he’s slowing down a little. Parkinson’s.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t tell him that. He’s still in charge and his housekeeper doesn’t let grass grow under his feet.”
“I read an article that he also bought an older resort and remodeled, as well as a bait shop.”
“Yep, he’s managed to put about two dozen veterans to work. We usually have ten to twelve people living on the ranch at any given time. After a while they usually head back to where they came from. A few stay and find a place to call home in Hope.”
“And you?” Ethan asked, taking a guess that he was a veteran as well as Jack’s son.
“Guess I’m not going anywhere since I grew up here. And if you’re asking if I’m a veteran, I am.”
They were approaching a metal building that appeared to have been a garage at one time. The multiple windows, covered patio and French doors indicated it had been remodeled to house veterans. From inside he heard a baby crying. Isaac glanced at him, grinning.
“That doesn’t sound good.” Ethan slowed his steps, needing a minute to collect himself before he faced Eve. He hadn’t felt the best when he woke up that morning, attributing it to something he’d eaten the day before. Now he definitely felt his stomach tighten and he decided it was a case of nerves.
“Cold feet?” Isaac asked as he knocked on the door. “Are you regretting leav
ing her with the baby?”
“Nope.”
The door opened. A woman, tall with long auburn hair and a weary look in her hazel eyes, greeted them. The expression shifted to angry when she saw him standing behind Isaac.
“Having a bad day, Sierra?” Isaac pulled off his hat, grinning as if he didn’t see the storm coming.
“Oh, I’m having a lovely day. After a sleepless night.” She waved them inside, her expression going from angry to glacial when she looked at Ethan. “I’m assuming you’re the one who abandoned that poor baby girl.”
“I didn’t abandon her,” he defended. But he wouldn’t say more, not to this woman.
The other woman in the room, he guessed he would have to say something to her. She held Tori in her arms as tears streamed down the baby girl’s face. Eve looked exhausted and close to tears. He hadn’t expected it to be quite this traumatic. For either of them.
“How dare you,” she spat.
He stepped forward and held his arms out to Tori. She reached for him, sobbing.
“You can’t explain to a six-month-old that the person they need is coming back. Or that the person they need is being selfish, rotten, horrible...”
“Shh,” he whispered to Tori, holding her close. He rocked back and forth, whispering comforting words. His mom had taught him this trick. It also worked to calm Eve. She quieted, still glaring but no longer spewing harsh words at him.
That was good, because he needed a minute to breathe.
“I guess I shouldn’t ask how it went?” he spoke softly.
“She didn’t sleep. And I didn’t know what to do to help her.” Eve’s voice trailed off on a sigh. “You could have asked. You could have told me what to do for her, what she likes. Instead you just walked out.”
“Shh,” he tried again, hoping that it would again work on Eve. He stood in the middle of the oversize living room with early morning sunlight streaming through kitchen windows and Tori cuddled against his shoulder. Eve sat a few feet away from him looking ready to spit nails.
“I didn’t plan on leaving,” he told her in a whisper. “I had to make a call. I got to the car and it hit me that you would never agree to this guardianship. I knew you would come up with dozens of reasons why you can’t.”
“And I would have been right.”
He glanced down at the child sleeping in his arms. He’d had a couple of weeks to get used to the idea of parenting her, of being a dad. He’d come to terms with the big changes in his life because she was in it. Like Eve, he’d had a lot of reasons why he couldn’t.
Those reasons still crept up on him from time to time. Usually in the middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep, or Tori couldn’t sleep. He’d hired a nanny. That didn’t really suffice. Mrs. Porter wasn’t looking for another child to raise. She showed Tori a lot of love, but she’d made it clear from the beginning she could nanny but she wasn’t the parent. He couldn’t give that duty over to someone else.
“I’m sorry, Eve, but I had to do something to make you see how important this is. We can’t just walk away from her. It might not be what we signed on for and I feel like I’m the last person who should be raising this little girl, but James and Hanna trusted us.”
“But there is no us,” she said with a lift of her chin, but he could see pain reflected in her dark eyes.
The pain he saw didn’t bother him as much as what he didn’t see in her eyes, in her expression. He didn’t see the person he used to know, the woman he’d planned to marry.
He had noticed the same yesterday, and he guessed that’s why he’d left Tori with her. He’d been sitting there looking at a woman he used to think he knew better than he knew himself, and he hadn’t recognized her.
“There is no us, but we still exist, you and me, and Tori needs us.” He said it softly because the little girl in his arms seemed to be drifting off, even with the occasional sob.
“There has to be another option. I obviously can’t do this. Last night was proof.”
“Last night meant nothing. You’ve always managed, Eve. You’re strong and capable.”
“Before, Ethan. I was that person before. This is me now, and I can’t.”
“I guess you have changed. I’ve never heard you say you can’t do anything.”
He sat down on a nearby chair. Isaac had left. The woman named Sierra had also disappeared. They were alone. When had they last been alone? The night he proposed? It had been the night she left for Afghanistan. He’d taken her to dinner in San Antonio and they’d walked along the riverfront surrounded by people, music and twinkling lights.
He’d dropped to one knee there in front of strangers passing by, seeing the sights. Dozens had stopped to watch as she cried and said yes. Later they’d made the drive to the airport, his ring glistening on her finger, planning a wedding that would never happen.
“Ethan?” Her voice was soft, quiet, questioning.
He glanced down at the little girl in his arms.
“What other option is there, Eve? Should we turn her over to the state, let her take her chances with whoever they choose? Should we find some distant relative? What do you recommend?”
He leaned back in the chair and studied her face, her expression. She was everything familiar. His childhood friend. The person he’d loved. Had loved. Past tense. The woman he’d wanted to spend his life with had been someone else, someone who never backed down. She looked as tough, as stubborn as ever, but there was something fragile in her expression.
Something in her expression made him recheck his feelings. He’d been bucked off horses, trampled by a bull, broken his arm jumping dirt bikes. She’d been his only broken heart. He didn’t want another one.
“There is no us, you’ve made that clear.” He loosened his hold on Tori and she sighed in her sleep. “I’m glad you thought that was your decision to make and that I had no say in the matter. That is beside the point. There is a Tori. And she needs a home. She needs us. You and me.”
“She is obviously bonded to you. You’ve figured this parenting thing out.” Her voice took on a frantic tone.
“No, I haven’t figured it out. I have help. My mom. My sister. But they can’t raise her.” Not that he hadn’t considered it. He could go to court, get custody finalized and then give guardianship to his sister, Bethany.
“What are we supposed to do?” Eve asked, moving closer, her gaze landing on the child in his arms.
“That’s why I’m here,” he admitted. “So we can figure this out. The judge wants this case settled. He’s given me temporary guardianship but he wants to be able to finalize her guardianship and he wants it done as soon as possible. He believes James and Hanna made a decision based on the facts they had and that they had a reason for the choice they made. There’s a court date in six weeks.”
“Court?”
“In Texas. And you have to be there. We both have to go and we need to have a plan in place by then.”
“A plan?”
He tried to hide the hint of a smile her questions instigated. “A plan for Tori, for us, for the future.”
She shook her head. “My future is here. You have a life in Texas. We can’t shift her back and forth like some unwanted little parcel. That wouldn’t give her the stability she needs or the family she deserves.”
She was right. They weren’t a couple. They hadn’t been for several years. And, if it had been that easy for her to end things, maybe they had never truly been a couple.
That realization didn’t help solve the problem at hand. Tori’s dependence on them to make the right choices. Like it or not, they were in this together.
Chapter Three
She couldn’t do this. She didn’t know what “this” meant. It seemed to be a whole list of things. She couldn’t be a parent. She couldn’t process the loss of friends she hadn’t spoken to in years. The loss was real
, even with the passing of time.
Her gaze landed on their little girl. The peaceful, sleeping child in Ethan’s arms.
Ethan. She looked up and found him watching her, questions burning in his blue eyes. He was at the top of the list of things she couldn’t tackle. Not right now with her emotions shattered.
She pushed her chair away from him and headed for the door, fighting tears, fighting with the past. As she went out the door, she heard him call her name. She shook her head. Not because she wouldn’t deal with this situation but because she needed a few minutes alone to figure out the next step.
She needed to pray. Her heart constricted at the thought of prayer. Because she did pray. She went to church. Sometimes she sang in the choir. But when anyone said to trust God, she felt a spike of true anger rise up in her spirit. Because she had trusted Him. She’d prayed. She’d believed.
And here she was. James and Hanna were gone and it wasn’t right. She wanted to scream to heaven that it wasn’t fair. And where was God in all this?
With no clear destination in mind she found herself at the kennel. She opened a gate and whistled to the dog inside. The yellow Labrador retriever immediately moved to her side, probably glad to escape the kennel and her puppies. The dogs training to be service animals were typically housed with either the men or women on the ranch, so they were socialized and immersed in training.
In the beginning, the dogs had been a hobby and therapy. With time, experience and training, Mercy Ranch had become a key provider of service dogs to members of the military and to other deserving folks around the country.
“How’s the family?” Eve asked the dog. In response, April gave her a sloppy dog kiss. “Eight puppies. You’re an expert. Do you have any advice for me?”
April sat next to Eve’s chair, waiting expectantly.
“I didn’t think so.” Eve closed her eyes and waited for an answer, for some clear response to the turmoil she felt. Tori was James and Hanna’s daughter. She was a tiny little girl without parents. She needed people to count on.
Her Oklahoma Rancher (Mercy Ranch Book 3) Page 3