by Leah Martyn
‘The little girl?’
‘Mmm.’ He turned and bent towards her, pressing his forehead against hers in an almost conciliatory gesture. ‘I’ll see you safely inside and then I’ll make tracks.’
When he’d gone, Jane closed the front door and leant against it, feeling drained and claimed by an inexpressible sense of sadness.
On Saturday morning, Jane stopped outside Riley’s surgery door, steeled herself and then knocked.
‘It’s open.’
‘Good morning.’ She popped her head in.
Riley looked up and forced a smile. ‘Jane…’
‘I’m in if you need anything.’ He looked tired, she thought, noticing the dispirited lines around his mouth with something like guilt. Would they ever get it right? ‘Catching up on paperwork.’
‘Oh—OK.’
She watched him tidy his desk, something he always did when he came in. Almost against her will, her gaze followed his hands. They were strong with tapered fingers, capable, loving…She drew quickly back. ‘Would you like a coffee?’
Two creases appeared between his brows. ‘No, thanks.’ His mouth compressed for a second. ‘I had one at home.’
Jane went back to her consulting room. She felt like throwing things. Why on earth had she come in? Because for some reason she wanted to be near him.
Two hours later, she began to feel she was getting on top of things. She wondered how Riley was getting on. Possibly he’d left the surgery already. They kept appointments to a bare minimum on a Saturday morning, but sometimes it was the only time some patients could get in to see the doctor.
Jane leaned back in the chair and stretched. Time for a cup of tea. Swinging to her feet, she moved a few paces to the window, looking out at the grassy paddocks beyond. They were all shades of green with some brown patches here and there where grasses hadn’t yet sprung up after the spring rain.
She took a deep breath, inhaling the intoxicating scent of eucalpyts and woodsmoke. She closed her eyes for a moment, reflecting that she had so much to be grateful for, including a husband who loved her. And she loved him. So why couldn’t she take the final step and take him back into her heart and into her bed?
The sharp rap on her door startled her. It was Riley. He came in, closing the door behind him. ‘I need you,’ he said abruptly.
‘Oh.’ Jane swallowed and flushed. Had they been on the same wavelength?
‘Not like that.’ His voice held a trace of mockery. ‘I’ve just seen Emma Crossingham.’ He moved towards her desk and parked himself on the edge.
Jane brought her thoughts together with a snap. ‘And did you find anything?’ She was a little in awe of her husband’s diagnostic ability.
He rocked his hand. ‘It’s a bit iffy but I think I may be onto something.’
‘How can I help?’
‘Vicki’s gone out to post some mail. I wondered if you could take care of Emma while I have a word with her mother.’
‘I’ll come out to Reception.’ Jane was eager. ‘We’ll raid the toy box.’ She put a hand on his sleeve as they walked out. ‘Take your time. I’ll keep her occupied.’
‘I must apologise again for my husband’s absence, Doctor.’ Having seen her daughter safely settled in Jane’s care, Sandrine Crossingham took her place in Riley’s consulting room. ‘I know you asked to see us both.’
‘Can’t be helped.’ Riley placed his hands, palms down, on the desk in front of him. ‘He’s a builder, you said?’
‘Working on the new block of shops across the road.’ Sandrine flapped a hand vaguely towards the window. ‘I believe one of them is designated as a small supermarket. Nice and handy for you all here at the surgery when they’re finished. Sorry.’ She bit her lips together. ‘I’m rambling on.’
Riley inclined his head, waited a few seconds and then spoke. ‘I agree with Dr Kouras. Physically Emma is fine but she’s a very vulnerable little person at the moment.’
Sandrine looked haunted. ‘I know. She’s told us she’s scared about something but she can’t or won’t tell us what it is.’
‘She’s a child, Mrs Crossingham,’ Riley said patiently. ‘It’s unlikely she’s deliberately holding back. More likely, she can’t articulate what it is that’s upset her. Can you think of anything that might have happened in the family that could have upset Emma, really rocked her world? Anything?’
Sandrine shook her head. ‘All I know is that it’s been hell lately, with Robert working crazy hours and Emma being so difficult. I’ve even had to cut my hours at the bank to stay home with her. On top of everything, we had to have the dog put down.’
Riley heard a warning bell. Not a great clang but a definite tinkle. ‘When was this? And why was it necessary?’
Sandrine considered. ‘It’s probably about six weeks ago now. And why? Unfortunately, the dog, Prince, started snapping at people he’d previously been friendly with. Then he bit a child who lived nearby.’ Her mouth turned down. ‘The RSPCA got involved and said it was too risky to keep him. They took him away while Emma was at kindy.’
Riley stroked a hand around his jaw. The puzzle was falling into place. He shook his head. ‘Would the onset of your daughter’s odd behaviour have begun around the same time as the dog was taken away?’
Sandrine thought for a moment and then looked shocked. ‘Oh, lord.’ She put a hand to her mouth. ‘Are you saying she’s grieving, Dr Brennan?’
‘It’s very likely,’ Riley responded gently. ‘You and her father need to talk to her, Sandrine. I take it Prince was her pet, part of the family. And small children make little distinction between animals and people. He was dear to her and now he’s gone. If, as you say, the dog was taken while she was at kindergarten, she didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. Perhaps she’s even thinking that Prince was also sad without her…’
‘Oh…’ Sandrine’s eyes overflowed and she swiped at them with the backs of her hands. ‘Poor little angel.’ She swallowed. ‘I thought we had explained, but obviously we didn’t spend nearly enough time with her, let her ask questions.’
Riley pushed the box of tissues towards the young mother. ‘I’m sure you’ll do it now. And it might be an idea to have a little ceremony as well, plant a shrub in memory of Prince. One that will have nice bright blossoms. Kids’ stuff.’ He smiled crookedly. ‘You know what I mean.’
‘Yes.’ Sandrine sniffed. ‘In retrospect, Robert and I probably handled the whole thing rather badly. And hurriedly. We failed our child.’
‘And would that we could all be born with hindsight,’ Riley commented soberly.
Sandrine took a steadying breath and met his eyes. ‘Thank you for your perception, Dr Brennan. Do you have children of your own?’
‘No, not yet.’ With a funny little shrug, he added, ‘Maybe one day.’ He swallowed against the sudden constriction in his throat. The oddest feeling of need ripped through him, and with it came anguish. Was this urge to procreate what Jane had tried to get him to understand? Oh, Janey…is this where you were coming from?
Startled into awareness, he shook his head. Did men have a biological clock? he wondered. If they did, his was beginning to tick like a time bomb.
CHAPTER NINE
‘WHO’S a clever clogs, then?’
Riley looked up and put his pen down. His mouth moved in a brief smile. ‘Is that tea you have there, Dr Rossiter?’
Jane felt absurdly light-hearted as she placed the dark blue mug in front of him. ‘That was one very happy mum who just left. She said you were brilliant.’
‘Aw, shucks.’ He picked up his mug and looked at her over its rim. ‘I’ve been working towards a degree in child psychology over the internet,’ he confessed with a sheepish grin.
‘Since when?’
He lifted a shoulder. ‘A while.’
‘You astound me,’ she murmured, feeling a spiralling of need in her stomach.
Looking up at her under his lashes, he said wryly, ‘You thought I’d just been messing aroun
d this past year, didn’t you, Janey?’
‘You’ve always been an achiever, Riley.’ She wondered where her voice had gone, so suddenly, unbearably conscious of him and of the wild attraction they still sparked off one another, even after six years of marriage. ‘Was Emma your last appointment?’
‘Yep.’ He raised his hands into a relaxing arc and stretched.
Jane took a mouthful of her tea and keeping her fingers clasped around her mug, asked, ‘Do you have any plans for this afternoon?’
Riley’s eyes became hooded and he gave in to a slight feeling of wariness. ‘What did you have in mind?’
‘I want you to meet a couple, Mayetta and Bryn Lloyd. They have a herb farm about twenty kilometres out of town.’ She leant back in her chair and looked at him. ‘Mayetta is my patient—that is, when she remembers to come and see me. They’re having a baby, you see, and she hasn’t been this week for her checkup.’
Riley raised a brow. ‘Do you normally follow up your midwifery patients like that? Go to their homes?’
She tinkled a laugh. ‘Of course not. But Mayetta and Bryn have become friends. They gave me lots of advice when I was setting up my little herb garden and we kind of clicked, the way you do…’
Several expressions chased through Riley’s eyes and then he said levelly, ‘OK, that sounds good.’ He tacked on with a grin, ‘Will they give us lunch?’
Her heart flipped. He’d agreed. She’d been so afraid he wouldn’t. Afraid that all her dithering about their marriage had finally turned him off wanting to spend any time at all with her. She took a calming breath and returned his grin. ‘I’d say there’s fair chance they will.’ She got to her feet. ‘I’ll give Mayetta a call, tell her we’re on our way.’
They went in Riley’s Land Rover.
‘What’s their story?’ he asked interestedly. ‘Are they locals?’
‘Far from it. Bryn was a history professor at Melbourne University. One day they just decided to sell up and literally head for the bush to do their own thing.’
‘Good for them.’
‘Mayetta does amazing illustrations for children’s books. That more or less keeps them but their nursery business is growing and they actually have a few tourists calling in now, buying their herbs and things.’
He glanced at her keenly. ‘And this is their first child?’
‘Mmm.’ In an unconscious gesture, Jane linked her hands across her stomach. ‘They’re about our age, actually.’
‘You’re disgustingly healthy, May.’ Jane lowered her stethoscope and folded it back into her bag.
‘Told you.’ Mayetta Lloyd grinned, pulling her oversized T-shirt back down over her bump. ‘I feel fantastic. Except for the odd bit of heartburn and a few leg cramps at night,’ she qualified.
‘Keeping up your calcium?’ Jane enquired, scribbling on the card she’d brought with her.
‘Yes, Doctor,’ Mayetta said meekly. ‘And the afternoon rest and the gentle exercise. I’ve even booked into the hospital to have the baby.’ She made a small face. ‘You know I don’t want to go there, Jane.’
‘And you know it’s the best and safest option for you and your baby.’ Jane snapped her bag shut.
‘We attended most of the antenatal classes.’ Mayetta pleaded her case. ‘I’m sure I could safely deliver the baby at home.’
‘Are you trying to wear me down?’ Jane looked at her patient with mock severity. ‘Besides, apart from anything else, Bryn wants you to go to hospital.’
Mayetta rolled her eyes heavenward. ‘But he’s not having the baby, is he? Anyway…’ she sat up and swung her feet off the bed ‘…he’ll probably faint dead away and leave me panting on my own.’
Jane held back a smile. Her friend was probably right. Bryn was a lovely man but still a little in awe of the fact that at almost forty he was about to become a father.
But on the other hand, since his wife’s pregnancy, he had generously taken over many of the household duties, including the cooking, and from the aroma wafting through the house, something delicious was awaiting them for lunch.
‘Let’s sit for a minute.’ Mayetta lowered herself a bit awkwardly into one of the two wicker chairs in the bedroom, beckoning Jane into the other. ‘I want to talk about you.’
Jane hesitated. ‘The men?’
‘Are getting on famously by the sound of things.’
It was true. The Lloyds’ cottage was small and the companionable murmur of voices came from the kitchen.
‘So, how are things with you and Riley?’
Jane looked at Mayetta, who had not only become her friend but her confidante as well. ‘At a bit of a stalemate, I’m afraid. Riley assures me he loves me and he wants us to reconcile. He’s been very patient. I’m the one dragging my feet,’ she admitted with a rueful little twist to her mouth.
‘So you’re still living apart?’
Jane shrugged. ‘Basically.’
‘Oh, dear.’ Mayetta shook her auburn head. ‘That doesn’t sound too brilliant. Are you sure you’re not over-complicating things? I mean, you still love him, don’t you?’
‘Oh, yes, May, of course I do. I love him to bits.’
‘Then tell him, or better still, show him.’ May gave an impish grin.
Jane sighed. ‘You make it sound so simple.’
‘It is.’ Mayetta’s cornflower-blue eyes looked concerned. ‘Surely you’re not intending to let your marriage just crumble away, Jane? That’s awful.’
‘No, of course I’m not. Actually…’ Jane spread her hands. ‘When I woke this morning, I felt really positive about things.’
‘And that hasn’t diminished, has it?’
Jane shook her head. ‘When it comes down to it, I’d trust Riley with my life…’
‘Then stop being bloody-minded and let him come home.’
After the happy, long and leisurely meal, Riley and Jane heaped praise on their host’s culinary skills. Bryn’s thin, rather serious face lit with pleasure. ‘Our home-grown vegetables are pretty good at the moment,’ he said modestly.
‘Of course, it helps if you know what to do with them.’ Riley smiled at Jane. ‘Our vegetable lasagne never tasted this good, did it?’
‘Probably because we’ve never made it.’ Jane’s mouth tilted in a grin as she plucked a crisp lettuce leaf from the salad bowl.
Riley looked perplexed. ‘But there was something like this you used to make of a Sunday night—I was sure it was lasagne.’
‘Snake pie.’ Jane kept a straight face.
‘Oh.’ Riley’s dark brows lifted fractionally. ‘You never told me.’
‘Yes, I did.’ Jane snorted softly. ‘I just never told you what kind of snake.’
Riley looked solemnly into her eyes. ‘Is that important?’
‘Certainly.’ Jane suppressed a giggle—just. ‘One should always use a python.’
‘Stop it, you two.’ Mayetta clasped a hand to her heart. ‘If I start laughing, I’ll get a stitch in my side and it’ll be all your fault.’
Bryn looked on in faint bemusement. ‘Would anyone like a cup of tea?’
‘Perhaps later, thanks, Bryn.’ Still chuckling, Jane stood up and began to stack the dishes. ‘Right now, I want to raid the herb garden. I need something for aching feet.’
‘Mugwort,’ Mayetta said promptly. ‘We’ll gather some and you can stuff it in your shoes.’
‘The leaves?’ Jane’s eyes held laughing disbelief.
‘Works every time.’
Mayetta held a hand out to her husband. ‘Help me up, please, love.’
Bryn hovered uncertainly. ‘Shouldn’t you be resting now?’
‘I’m fine,’ she said shortly. ‘Just help me up out of this damned chair. Oh, sweetheart, don’t look so worried,’ she relented, cuffing her husband’s cheek playfully. ‘There are two doctors here if anything happens—not that it will,’ she hastened to add.
‘It was a nice afternoon, wasn’t it?’ Jane broke the silence as they drove h
ome.
Riley glanced at her and smiled. ‘Yes, it was. I haven’t had so much fun in ages. When is Mayetta’s baby due?’
‘Early next month—if she makes it that far.’ Jane turned her head to look at the countryside, at the gentle slopes of lush pastures, the patches of cultivation with their crops of canola already sprouting yellow flowers on their way to maturity when the seeds would be harvested for oil.
She glanced surreptitiously at Riley, relieved to see that the lines around his mouth had eased. Was this a good time to tell him she’d rediscovered her love for him, that it was bursting through every pore of her skin? That she wanted their marriage back, wanted him back in her life, in her heart? Now. Today.
She stole a look at him, trying to frame the words, but her heart was churning so hard it was an effort to concentrate. Finally she said, ‘Riley…’
‘Hmm?’ He turned for a second, seeming to look through her and then blink. ‘Sorry. I was miles away. If you don’t mind, I’ll make tracks as soon as I drop you home. I’m heading off to Brisbane.’
‘Brisbane?’ A tiny frown pleated Jane’s forehead and she saw her mentally prepared little speech of reconciliation dissolve into a million pieces. ‘Are you going to see your parents?’ And if he was, why wasn’t he taking her?
‘Briefly.’ He turned the Land Rover into her street and slowed. ‘There’s also a reunion tomorrow of some of the team who were in East Timor. Someone’s taken a suite at the Parkroyal. I imagine we’ll party pretty late so I’ll probably leave the drive back to Mt Pryde until early on Monday morning.’
While Jane was still digesting all this, he pulled into her driveway, leaving the engine running. ‘Sorry.’ He gave her a tentative smile. ‘Did you want to say something earlier? I kind of ran off with my own plans.’
Her laugh was brittle and she couldn’t wait to get out of the car. ‘It was nothing important,’ she lied. ‘Have fun.’