I wait a few seconds before pushing away from the door and making my way down the hall to join Jess in the kitchen.
“Hey, babe!” Jess holds a cup out to me the moment she sees me coming. “Made you my specialty drink. Hope you like it.”
“Thanks.” I nod and grab the cup from her. “What was that about?”
She shakes her head while sipping from her cup. “Nothing to worry over. Just Alana being Alana.”
She’s wrong. It is something to worry about and I need to change that.
“Let’s join the others outside. The boys are gathering wood for the bonfire and I’m sure Madden is tuning up his guitar to play for us.”
“To play for us?”
“Yup!” She loops her arm through mine and begins walking me outside. “Madden always plays for us on Friday nights. It’s been his thing for as long as I can remember. If you think he’s hot on stage, just wait until you see him in the light of the fire playing his acoustic. If you’re not completely in love with him yet, you will be.”
Yeah, cause that’s what I need. Another reason to be attracted to my boyfriend’s brother.
The memory of the night I caught him playing his guitar in his brother’s living room creeps in, reminding me of how badly I wanted to stick around and watch that intimate moment. It was stupid, and luckily is was ruined by a text from Alana. At least, lucky for me… him, not so much.
I still remember the look in his eyes when she ruined him for probably the millionth time since she first broke his heart.
And that look—the one etched into my brain—is going to get me through this night as his girlfriend. Fuck Alana. She broke him. This—me playing pretend with mister cocky rock star—is all her fault to begin with.
Once outside, Jess unloops her arm from mine and motions for me to take a seat in the chair beside her. Alana is across the fire pit once again—no surprise there—in the perfect place to keep her eyes on me. Good. Hope you like what you see.
“Does Madden play for you outside of concerts often?”
“Not often enough,” I admit.
“Seems he likes to save his private concerts for himself or here around the bonfire. I’m not even sure his brother has heard him play many times outside of being here.” The mention of Logan has me almost choking on my drink. “Have you met him yet?”
I nod. “A few times.”
“He’s cute, right?” Her smile widens, as if remembering something. “We almost hooked up once before I got with Jake. A bit of a player, he is.”
“A player?” I nearly choke on my tongue, fighting back asking a million questions that I know would catch me and Madden up.
She nods and points across the fire pit to where Alana is still watching us. “Yeah. Supposedly he even hit on Alana a few times when her and Madden were dating. I mean… he was drunk, but it still counts. Plus, he’s practically hooked up with every girl he grew up with.”
The more I hear, the sicker I become with anger and disgust.
“What did Madden do about him hitting on Alana?”
She shrugs. “Not much. I guess he just brushed it off as Logan being Logan. He knew nothing would ever happen between them. That’s a line Logan wouldn’t cross. Didn’t matter how drunk he was.”
My stomach hurts just thinking about the side of Logan that he’s apparently kept hidden from me. The bastard is lucky there’s no service here, because I can think of a lot of questions I’d like to ask him right now.
I’m so wrapped up in what I just learned about Logan that I didn’t even notice Madden was outside until he drapes his jacket over my shoulders and moves in close to my ear. “You forgot this,” he whispers.
My eyes follow him as he walks over to a tree away from the rest of us and leans against it, setting his guitar down beside him. Once again, I’m drawn to the way he places a cigarette between his lips and lights it. Taking a drag, he leans his head back and slowly exhales, the smoke surrounding him.
I’m still watching Madden, unaware of anyone else, when his eyes finally meet mine. Instead of turning away, he brings the cigarette to his lips again and takes a long drag, before tossing it and stomping it out with his foot.
Without a word, he grabs his guitar and walks over to a stool, pulling it out so that he’s sitting directly in front of me, facing my way. My heartrate speeds up from the anticipation of him playing so close to me.
“Right on, man.” Jake takes a seat on the other side of Jess and wraps his arm around her. “What you going to play for us first?”
Madden smiles, his attention focusing back on me, but instead of answering the question, he begins playing Send Me An Angel by Highly Suspect.
An instant smile takes over at his choice of band. The moment he begins singing, my breathing picks up, my chest quickly rising and falling as I listen to the passion in his voice. It’s so goddamn beautiful that it’s taking my breath away.
And this is the exact reason I’ve only seen RISK in concert once. It was just months after I started dating Logan. In fact, I hadn’t even met Madden yet. The first song he played had me forgetting about all the stuff on social media in regard to the reckless, playboy rock star. I felt him creeping into my soul that night, and that’s when I decided it was best to hate him… to believe all the shit put out there about him online.
I squeeze my cup in my hand, before bringing it to my lips desperately, needing it at the moment. Good thing Jess’s specialty drink is good, because I’ll be needing the whole thing before this song is over.
After taking a long drink, I chance a glance at Alana to see her expression has turned to anger. I can’t tell if she’s pissed at Madden or pissed at herself for breaking his heart in the first place. If I were her, I’d be pissed at myself. In fact, I’m pretty sure this moment would make me hate myself—seeing the man I love play for another woman.
When I turn my attention back to Madden, his eyes are on me. His gaze is so penetrating, and mixed with the intensity of his voice, I nearly forget to swallow the drink I’ve just taken. How the hell am I supposed to breathe right now with him looking at me like that?
“You’ve got goose bumps,” Jess says in my ear with a slight laugh. “Told you.”
Pulling my eyes away from Madden, I slip my arms into his jacket to hide the goose bumps that have apparently formed on them. I can’t even blame the night breeze, because the fire is so hot that my face feels like it’s on fire.
Once the song ends, someone whistles loudly, which has Madden smiling at me while he prepares for the next song.
I return his smile, unable to stop myself. I hate that smile. It’s incredibly adorable, which means he’s doing it on purpose to get a rise out of me.
The next song he plays has me dying even more inside as I listen to the lyrics. His voice in this song holds so much pain, but in a good way. Too damn painful.
“Who is this?” I ask Jess.
“Imminence,” she whispers. “A Mark On My Soul. Love this song.”
Well, looks like I do too now. I just wish he would stop looking at me while singing it. I seriously don’t know how many more songs I can sit through with those damn eyes of his on me. He’s doing this on purpose—pushing me—and I’m starting to believe he loves getting a reaction out of me. It’s working more than it should.
Luckily, after the song ends, he sets his guitar down beside him, giving me a moment to catch my breath. Surely, he’s not done yet, though.
Walking over to me, he kneels down in front of me and grabs the back of my head. “You okay over here?” he asks with a slight smile. “Breathe, Nat.”
“I am,” I say quickly. “Who said I’m not?”
“No one has to say it. I can tell you’re not.” He moves in close, his lips brushing over mine. “See… not breathing.”
“You’re wrong,” I whisper. “But I would appreciate it if you’d stop looking at me while you sing.”
His grip on the back of my head tightens as he smiles against my lips. �
��Kiss me, Nat. Everyone’s watching. Or are you too afraid after being lost in me for the last ten minutes?”
“There’s nothing to be afraid of. Your lips don’t affect me in the slightest.”
“Then prove it,” he breathes out. “Kiss me.”
Before I can talk myself out of it, I grab his face in both hands and press my lips against his, kissing him harder than I meant to. The brush of his tongue over my sealed lips almost has me opening up, but I pull back before I can make that mistake. It was almost too natural.
“Madden,” I mutter so only he can hear. “You know the rules.”
“Rules are meant to be broken, Nat. I’m the reckless rock star, remember?”
With that, he walks away and grabs his guitar. I keep my angry gaze on him as he begins playing again. This time it’s one of his songs, and just like before, he makes a point to look at me while he sings.
My thoughts are bouncing back and forth between wanting to murder him and wanting to get lost in him again. No one has ever been able to work me up this way before. Not even Logan on his worst days.
Shit, this was a bad idea. A very bad idea.
“I’ll be back,” I mutter to no one in particular, before standing up and walking away, my heart racing so hard it feels like it’s going to burst from my chest. I need to get away.
Once I make it to the cabin, I finish what’s left of my drink and quickly make another one, being sure not to make it too strong. As much as I wish I could be drunk right now, being drunk is probably a bad idea. Not that I’m saying I’d do anything inappropriate with Madden, just that it’s best to be in my right mindset while playing this little game with him. I’ve gotta make sure things don’t go too far.
“Pass the Vodka if you’re done with it.” Walker’s voice has me turning to face him. “The bottle…”
“Oh, right. Sorry.” I pass him the bottle and watch as he pours himself an extra strong drink.
He catches me watching and flashes me a playful smile. “Nice game today. You were looking good out there.”
“Thanks. I played in High school.”
“I know. Madden mentioned that earlier.”
“He did?” The question comes out before I can stop it. I don’t remember telling Madden about my volleyball days on the way here. Apparently, he’s done his research.
“Yeah.” He brings his cup to his lips and takes a small drink. “You looked a little flustered out there when Madden started singing. Your first time hearing him sing outside of a live concert?”
I shake my head. Yes. “No. He’s played for me a few times. I just needed another drink, that’s all.”
“You must really be into him if you needed another drink. He have you feeling a certain way you weren’t expecting? I can do that too.”
Before I can question what he meant by that, the door opens to Madden stepping inside. He takes one look at how close Walker is to me and grabs my hand. “Let’s go, Nat.”
“Okay…” I say when he pulls me along beside him as if in a hurry to get me away from Walker. “What’s the deal?” I ask the moment we get outside.
“Nothing,” he says rigidly. “Everyone’s waiting on you to come back out. Knowing Walker, he’ll keep you to himself for as long as the fucker can.”
“What’s wrong with Walker?” I laugh. “He seems nice.”
“Yeah, a little too fucking nice. Trust me.”
“Calm down, Madden.” I take off walking toward the bonfire. “You’re acting like he’s going to make a move on me.”
“He might,” he grits out, falling into step beside me. “You let me know if he does and I’ll lay the dickhead out. I mean it, Nat.”
I swallow, not used to someone being so protective over me. “Okay, I will.”
“Good. That’s all I ask.”
Once back with everyone else, Madden keeps his eyes on the cabin, as if he’s waiting for Walker to come out. Jake and Seth are talking to him about something, yet he isn’t paying much attention to them.
I can’t believe how worked up he is over Walker getting me alone. I deal with assholes all the time at the hotel who hit on me and try to pick me up, and all Logan does is shake his head and say, “It’s a good thing you have that stun gun then,” as if he isn’t worried about someone getting to me in the slightest.
Just once I’d like to see him care enough to get worked up like his brother is right now. He might be playing pretend this weekend, but his reaction in the cabin was anything but.
I shouldn’t like it, but I do. Maybe I don’t have to be drunk to do something inappropriate. And that scares me.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Madden
I’m protective over Natalie in a way I’ve never been with Alana. Hell, my own brother used to hit on her and I brushed it off, knowing nothing would ever happen between them. I know for a fact nothing would ever happen between Natalie and Walker, yet I still want to keep him away from her.
I’ve known Walker my entire life—he’s one of my best friends—but when it comes to keeping Natalie safe I’ll fuck him up if it comes down to it. I brought her here, which makes her my responsibility, and the way he was eyeing her over earlier like a piece of ass he wants to conquer, he will now be in my sights at all times.
“Who’s got the speaker?” Riley questions from behind me somewhere. “I’ll hook it up to my phone.”
“It’s right here,” Alana mutters. “And no you won’t. I’ll hook it up to mine. I’m done listening to that song from RISK. I’ve got something better to play.”
Seconds later, Alana’s playlist begins playing over the portable speaker. Her song choice has my eyes meeting hers as the lyrics to Alone by I Prevail surrounds us. It’s the song I played for her after she walked away from me and broke my heart. I was desperate to get her back. Apparently, she wants me to remember this song and what it meant that night.
Well… it’s working. That familiar ache hits my chest as I get lost in her stare; the one that used to take my breath away. I’m lost in Alana—lost in that moment of our past—when a hand grabs my cheek and I’m face to face with Natalie.
“Dance with me,” she whispers in my ear, wrapping her arms around my neck as she moves in close; so fucking close. “Come on.”
Pissed that I allowed Alana to get to me, I wrap my arms around Natalie and move my body against hers to the song that’s haunted me for years; the lyrics that break me and remind me of how Alana left me bleeding each time I hear it. “You sure you want this with me? I can’t be held liable for what I do right now.”
“Not sure I have much of a choice,” she says quietly. “You were about to lose it, Madden. Everyone was watching you.”
“Including you?” I question above her lips.
“It was hard not to. You only stood there for a solid minute staring at your ex. The girl you’re trying to prove to that you’ve moved on from.”
“This song fucks with me, Nat. It gets in my head and makes me think about what I lost. In case you haven’t noticed, music talks to me and fucks with me in the worst ways. She knows this.”
“Then show her how much this song doesn’t affect you anymore. It’s what I’m here for, right? Use me.”
My gaze lowers to hers, and without a second thought, I bring my lips to hers, growling against them when she kisses me back. She’s less hesitant this time, which has me swiping my tongue out like an asshole. The slight brush of her tongue on mine before she pulls it back has my dick hardening.
“Fuck,” I whisper, before biting her bottom lip and tangling my hand into the bottom of her hair. I’m completely lost in this moment with Natalie—and so damn turned on—that I don’t even realize I’m grinding my dick against her until she moans against my mouth and presses her hands against my chest.
“Stop, Madden,” she breathes out. “Don’t… move…”
“Why?” I push, continuing to move my body against hers. I’m taking my anger out on her even though I know I shouldn’t. I need to
feel anything but what I was feeling before we started dancing. “I asked you if you really wanted to do this. You wanted to dance, so…”
“I need you to stop now,” she growls against my lips. “Your dick—”
“What?” I move my free hand down to grip her ass, pulling her closer to me. The feel of her ass in my hand causes my dick to jerk against her. “Feels good against you? It’s okay to admit…”
“Fuck you. I’m done helping you.” She bites my lip hard enough for me to release her. “Good luck on your own.”
I stand here, hands in my hair as she heads toward the cabin. I can feel eyes on me, but I’m too focused on what I need to do to make up with Natalie to care.
“Everything okay?” Jess questions. “Need me to go talk to her?”
“No. She’s good, Jess. She just had a drink too many and needs a moment to cool off.” When I turn away from Jess, Alana’s gaze is on me. I can’t tell if she’s hurt by me kissing Natalie or happy about her stomping away. “I think we’re going to call it a night and wind down in the hot tub.”
The mention of the hot tub has Alana’s eyes narrowing in anger, but before she can say anything, I walk away in search of Natalie.
I find her in the bedroom with her phone in her hand. She doesn’t look up when she hears me enter the room. Instead, she continues to type furiously. “What do you want?”
“What are you doing? There’s no service here.”
“Oh, nothing. Just sending out a long, detailed message to your brother and how I want to kick his ass for being a liar. And for agreeing to let me come here this weekend. I want to get it all out before I forget any details.”
“Are you drunk?”
She holds up her empty cup before flicking it my way. “That’s none of your business. Now go away. I’m done with you for the night. I’ve played your game all day.”
“What exactly are you saying to my brother about me? That I’m a better kisser?” I tease her, hoping to get her attention long enough so she’ll stop typing. “Because he already knows. You’re not the first girl that we’ve both kissed.”
Reckless Rock Star (Cocky Hero Club) Page 14