Blooper Freak (The Worst Detective Ever Book 5)

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Blooper Freak (The Worst Detective Ever Book 5) Page 19

by Christy Barritt


  “Joey, when I first met you, I had no idea what to think—except that I needed you to stop interrupting my police investigation. I thought you were a little crazy and really beautiful. But I figured you’d be stuck up and full of yourself and part of the Hollywood elite. I also thought you were fascinating and unlike anyone I’d ever met before.”

  My heart pounded in my ears as I waited for him to finish.

  “But then I got to know you. To know you beyond Joey Darling, the actress. And I discovered someone who was not only fun and beautiful but who deeply cares about other people. Who isn’t a spoiled little starlet who insists on having an entourage around her.”

  “Entourages are so three years ago.” I winked, but then turned serious again.

  “People love you because you’re real, I’ve realized.” He appeared unfazed by my offhandedness. “You constantly think about other people above yourself. You’ve been through the fire, and you’ve come out even more beautiful.”

  His words made me freeze. Made me aware of only Jackson, no one else around us. Made me unable to look away from his gaze.

  He reached for me, and his hands cupped my face. “Not many women would do what you did tonight, Joey. It really meant a lot to me that you weren’t afraid to talk about Claire.”

  “I meant every word I said.”

  His gaze burned into mine. “I know. And Joey, I meant it when I said I wanted to give you time to get over Eric. But I’ve also realized that I would be a fool to ever let you go.”

  My heart nearly beat out of my chest as his words settled on me.

  I hadn’t scared Jackson away yet. And I hoped I never did.

  Before he could say anything, I reached up and pulled his head toward mine. My lips met his, and everything around us disappeared. It was just the two of us. And it felt wonderful.

  “Joey, can I get your picture?” A camera flashed.

  Jackson and I pulled away from each other. My cheeks heated—not with embarrassment but with emotion and exhilaration.

  We didn’t acknowledge the photographer, though he continued to take pictures. I didn’t even care.

  As I started to step away, I glanced down at the packet of papers I’d been given for this event. That was when I saw a folded piece of paper there with my name scrawled on it.

  Weird.

  I stopped for a minute and opened the paper.

  There was an address written there: 15187 Sandy Shoals Dr.

  I showed Jackson, and our gazes met.

  I’d solved another mystery. So now my super-stalker fan club was sending me another clue.

  An address? What did this mean? What would I find if I went there?

  I had no idea, but I had a feeling it had something to do with my father. I grabbed my keys.

  I had to find out. Now.

  Coming Next: Flaw Abiding Citizen

  Stuck on an island with an impending hurricane and a deadly killer? It's just another day in the life of Joey Darling.

  Click HERE to get your copy!

  Also by Christy Barritt:

  The Worst Detective Ever:

  Ready to Fumble (Book 1)

  I'm not really a private detective. I just play one on TV. Joey Darling, better known to the world as Raven Remington, detective extraordinaire, is trying to separate herself from her invincible alter ego. She played the spunky character for five years on the hit TV show Relentless, which catapulted her to fame and into the role of Hollywood’s sweetheart. When her marriage falls apart, her finances dwindle to nothing, and her father disappears, Joey finds herself on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, trying to piece her life back together away from the limelight. A woman finds Raven—er, Joey—and insists on hiring her fictional counterpart to find a missing boyfriend. When someone begins staging crime scenes to match an episode of Relentless, Joey has no choice but to get involved.

  Reign of Error (Book 2)

  Sometimes in life, you just want to yell “Take two!” When a Polar Plunge goes terribly wrong and someone dies in the icy water, former TV detective Joey Darling wants nothing to do with the subsequent investigation. But when her picture is found in the dead man’s wallet and witnesses place her as the last person seen speaking with the man, she realizes she’s been cast in a role she never wanted: suspect. Joey makes the dramatic mistake of challenging the killer on camera, and now it’s a race to find the bad guy before he finds her. Danger abounds and suspects are harder to find than the Lost Colony of Roanoke Island. Will Joey find the killer? Or will her mistake-riddled streak continue?

  Safety in Blunders (Book 3)

  My name is Joey Darling, and I’m a disgrace to imaginary detectives everywhere. When actress Joey Darling discovers a mermaid tail with drops of fresh blood on it while hiking in a remote nature preserve, she knows something suspicious is going on. As details surface, Joey realizes she’s dealing with a problem she has encountered one too many times: someone desperate for fame who falls victim to a predator. With the help of her neighbor Zane Oakley and the opposition of local detective Jackson Sullivan, Joey hunts for answers, unaware of the deadly net in which she’s about to entangle herself. Joey knows she’s a fish out of water when it comes to cracking cases, but can she use her talent—acting—to help find the missing woman? Or will Joey end up swimming with sharks?

  Join the Flub (Book 4)

  There’s no business like show business . . . especially when a killer is involved. Joey Darling’s local movie premiere was supposed to be a win-win for everyone involved. But things go awry when the event is sabotaged and Joey’s stunt double is seriously injured. Suspects seem sparser than quality G-rated movies, and police fear the intended target was actually Joey. Detective Jackson Sullivan and neighbor Zane Oakley—two men competing for Joey’s affection—insist on trading off guard duty until the bad guy is behind bars. To make matters even worse, Joey’s ex shows up right before the release of his tell-all book about his life with the Hollywood sweetheart. Someone seems determined to create real-life drama. But Joey isn’t one to be deterred. Though a movie-worthy villain wants to pull the plug on this production—and maybe even on a few people’s lives—Joey is determined that the show must go on.

  Blooper Freak (Book 5)

  Joey's friend is accused of murder and the mysterious fan club stalking Joey has answers she desperately needs. With each new case, the Hollywood starlet edges closer to the truth about her missing father.

  Flaw Abiding Citizen (Book 6)

  Coming in November

  Squeaky Clean Mysteries:

  Hazardous Duty (Book 1)

  On her way to completing a degree in forensic science, Gabby St. Claire drops out of school and starts her own crime-scene cleaning business. When a routine cleaning job uncovers a murder weapon the police overlooked, she realizes that the wrong person is in jail. But the owner of the weapon is a powerful foe . . . and willing to do anything to keep Gabby quiet. With the help of her new neighbor, Riley Thomas, a man whose life and faith fascinate her, Gabby seeks to find the killer before another murder occurs.

  Suspicious Minds (Book 2)

  In this smart and suspenseful sequel to Hazardous Duty, crime-scene cleaner Gabby St. Claire finds herself stuck doing mold remediation to pay the bills. Her first day on the job, she uncovers a surprise in the crawlspace of a dilapidated home: Elvis, dead as a doornail and still wearing his blue-suede shoes. How could she possibly keep her nose out of a case like this?

  It Came Upon a Midnight Crime (Book 2.5)

  Someone is intent on destroying the true meaning of Christmas—at least, destroying anything that hints of it. All around crime-scene cleaner Gabby St. Claire’s hometown, anything pointing to Jesus as “the reason for the season” is being sabotaged. The crimes become more twisted as dismembered body parts are found at the vandalisms. Someone is determined to destroy Christmas . . . but Gabby is just as determined to find the Grinch and let peace on earth and goodwill prevail.

  Organized Grime (Book 3)


  Gabby St. Claire knows her best friend, Sierra, isn’t guilty of killing three people in what appears to be an eco-terrorist attack. But Sierra has disappeared, her only contact a frantic phone call to Gabby proclaiming she’s being hunted. Gabby is determined to prove her friend is innocent and to keep Sierra alive. While trying to track down the real perpetrator, Gabby notices a disturbing trend at the crime scenes she’s cleaning, one that ties random crimes together—and points to Sierra as the guilty party. Just what has her friend gotten herself involved in?

  Dirty Deeds (Book 4)

  “Promise me one thing. No snooping. Just for one week.” Gabby St. Claire knows that her fiancé’s request is a simple one she should be able to honor. After all, Riley’s law school reunion and attorneys’ conference at a posh resort is a chance for them to get away from the mysteries Gabby often finds herself involved in as a crime-scene cleaner. Then an old friend of Riley’s goes missing. Gabby suspects one of Riley’s buddies might be behind the disappearance. When the missing woman’s mom asks Gabby for help, how can she say no?

  The Scum of All Fears (Book 5)

  Gabby St. Claire is back to crime-scene cleaning and needs help after a weekend killing spree fills her work docket. A serial killer her fiancé put behind bars has escaped. His last words to Riley were: I’ll get out, and I’ll get even. Pictures of Gabby are found in the man’s prison cell, messages are left for Gabby at crime scenes, someone keeps slipping in and out of her apartment, and her temporary assistant disappears. The search for answers becomes darker when Gabby realizes she’s dealing with a criminal who is truly the scum of the earth. He will do anything to make Gabby’s and Riley’s lives a living nightmare.

  To Love, Honor, and Perish (Book 6)

  Just when Gabby St. Claire’s life is on the right track, the unthinkable happens. Her fiancé, Riley Thomas, is shot and in life-threatening condition only a week before their wedding. Gabby is determined to figure out who pulled the trigger, even if investigating puts her own life at risk. As she digs deeper into the case, she discovers secrets better left alone. Doubts arise in her mind, and the one man with answers lies on death’s doorstep. Then an old foe returns and tests everything Gabby is made of—physically, mentally, and spiritually. Will all she’s worked for be destroyed?

  Mucky Streak (Book 7)

  Gabby St. Claire feels her life is smeared with the stain of tragedy. She takes a short-term gig as a private investigator—a cold case that’s eluded detectives for ten years. The mass murder of a wealthy family seems impossible to solve, but Gabby brings more clues to light. Add to the mix a flirtatious client, travels to an exciting new city, and some quirky—albeit temporary—new sidekicks, and things get complicated. With every new development, Gabby prays that her “mucky streak” will end and the future will become clear. Yet every answer she uncovers leads her closer to danger—both for her life and for her heart.

  Foul Play (Book 8)

  Gabby St. Claire is crying “foul play” in every sense of the phrase. When the crime-scene cleaner agrees to go undercover at a local community theater, she discovers more than backstage bickering, atrocious acting, and rotten writing. The female lead is dead, and an old classmate who has staked everything on the musical production’s success is about to go under. In her dual role of investigator and star of the show, Gabby finds the stakes rising faster than the opening-night curtain. She must face her past and make monumental decisions, not just about the play but also concerning her future relationships and career. Will Gabby find the killer before the curtain goes down—not only on the play, but also on life as she knows it?

  Broom and Gloom (Book 9)

  Gabby St. Claire is determined to get back in the saddle again. While in Oklahoma for a forensic conference, she meets her soon-to-be stepbrother, Trace Ryan, an up-and-coming country singer. A woman he was dating has disappeared, and he suspects a crazy fan may be behind it. Gabby agrees to investigate, as she tries to juggle her conference, navigate being alone in a new place, and locate a woman who may not want to be found. She discovers that sometimes taking life by the horns means staring danger in the face, no matter the consequences.

  Dust and Obey (Book 10)

  When Gabby St. Claire’s ex-fiancé, Riley Thomas, asks for her help in investigating a possible murder at a couples retreat, she knows she should say no. She knows she should run far, far away from the danger of both being around Riley and the crime. But her nosy instincts and determination take precedence over her logic. Gabby and Riley must work together to find the killer. In the process, they have to confront demons from their past and deal with their present relationship.

  Thrill Squeaker (Book 11)

  An abandoned theme park. An unsolved murder. A decision that will change Gabby’s life forever. Restoring an old amusement park and turning it into a destination resort seems like a fun idea for former crime-scene cleaner Gabby St. Claire. The side job gives her the chance to spend time with her friends, something she’s missed since beginning a new career. The job turns out to be more than Gabby bargained for when she finds a dead body on her first day. Add to the mix legends of Bigfoot, creepy clowns, and ghostlike remnants of happier times at the park, and her stay begins to feel like a rollercoaster ride. Someone doesn’t want the decrepit Mythical Falls to open again, but just how far is this person willing to go to ensure this venture fails? As the stakes rise and danger creeps closer, will Gabby be able to restore things in her own life that time has destroyed—including broken relationships? Or is her future closer to the fate of the doomed Mythical Falls?

  Swept Away, a Honeymoon Novella (Book 11.5)

  Finding the perfect place for a honeymoon, away from any potential danger or mystery, is challenging. But Gabby’s longtime love and newly minted husband, Riley Thomas, has done it. He has found a location with a nonexistent crime rate, a mostly retired population, and plenty of opportunities for relaxation in the warm sun. Within minutes of the newlyweds’ arrival, a convoy of vehicles pulls up to a nearby house, and their honeymoon oasis is destroyed like a sandcastle in a storm. Despite Gabby’s and Riley’s determination to keep to themselves, trouble comes knocking at their door—literally—when a neighbor is abducted from the beach directly outside their rental. Will Gabby and Riley be swept away with each other during their honeymoon . . . or will a tide of danger and mayhem pull them under?

  Cunning Attractions (Book 12)

  Politics. Love. Murder. Radio talk show host Bill McCormick is in his prime. He’s dating a supermodel, his book is a bestseller, and his ratings have skyrocketed during the heated election season. But when Bill’s ex-wife, Emma Jean, turns up dead, the media and his detractors assume the opinionated loudmouth is guilty of her murder. Bill’s on-air rants about his demon-possessed ex don’t help his case. Did someone realize that Bill was the perfect scapegoat? Or could Bill have silenced his Ice Queen ex once and for all? As Gabby comes closer to casting her vote for the guilty party, the stakes rise, tensions heat, and her own life is endangered. Will she be able to do a recount as votes are cast about who the murderer is? Or was this whole crime rigged from the start?

  Clean Getaway (Book 13)

  Gabby St. Claire Thomas has been given the opportunity of a lifetime: heading up a privately funded Cold Case Squad and handpicking the team members. Persnickety Evie Manson and nerdy Sherman Gilbert join forces with Gabby to bring justice and solace to families still wanting answers. On their first case, the Squad discovers that the murders of Ron and Margie Simmons are more than cold—they’re frozen solid. The couple’s anniversary celebration ended as a double homicide, and ten years later their daughter is still waiting for answers. But who would want to kill the loving couple? What kind of secrets were hiding beneath their cheery, All American exteriors? With every new lead, someone tries to sabotage their investigation . . . but the team might just end up being their own worst enemies. As a deadline presses in, can Gabby and her Squad bring the heat? Or will this cold-case killer
make a clean getaway?

  While You Were Sweeping, a Riley Thomas Novella

  Riley Thomas is trying to come to terms with life after a traumatic brain injury turned his world upside down. Away from everything familiar—including his crime-scene-cleaning former fiancée and his career as a social-rights attorney—he’s determined to prove himself and regain his old life. But when he claims he witnessed his neighbor shoot and kill someone, everyone thinks he’s crazy. When all evidence of the crime disappears, even Riley has to wonder if he’s losing his mind.

  Note: While You Were Sweeping is a spin-off mystery written in conjunction with the Squeaky Clean series featuring crime-scene cleaner Gabby St. Claire.

  Holly Anna Paladin Mysteries:

  Random Acts of Murder (Book 1)

  When Holly Anna Paladin is given a year to live, she embraces her final days doing what she loves most—random acts of kindness. But one of her extreme good deeds goes horribly wrong, implicating her in a string of murders. Holly is suddenly thrust into a different kind of fight for her life. Could it also be random that the detective assigned to the case is her old high school crush and present-day nemesis? Will Holly find the killer before he ruins what is left of her life? Or will she spend her final days alone and behind bars?

  Random Acts of Deceit (Book 2)

  “Break up with Chase Dexter, or I’ll kill him.” Holly Anna Paladin never expected such a gut-wrenching ultimatum. With home invasions, hidden cameras, and bomb threats, Holly must make some serious choices. Whatever she decides, the consequences will either break her heart or break her soul. She tries to match wits with the Shadow Man, but the more she fights, the deeper she’s drawn into the perilous situation. With her sister’s wedding problems and the riots in the city, Holly has nearly reached her breaking point. She must stop this mystery man before someone she loves dies. But the deceit is threatening to pull her under . . . six feet under.

 

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