Astra studied Tani for a long moment. “May I ask you a personal question?”
“Sure,” Tani replied.
“Why aren’t you happy?”
“Happy? I’m sorry, Astra, I don’t understand.”
“I just want to know why it is that you can shift into an amazing creature of power and magic, just like all Clan Jasani, and you’re not happy.”
“Because it’s not like Clan Jasani at all, Astra,” she said quietly. “Clan Jasani are mammalian. My dragon is reptilian. I felt a dracon inside of me, waiting and wanting to come out, but I couldn’t free her. Magda’s magic connected with the dracon inside of me. It made her strong enough to come out, but it changed her in the process. I didn’t think I could be any different than the people I was born to, but I was wrong. Very wrong. I can’t even pretend to fit in now.”
“I’m so sorry, Tani,” Astra said. “I wish I’d never dragged you into our troubles. Your life wouldn’t be such a mess now.”
“No Astra,” Tani said, forcing a smile she didn’t feel. “It was my destiny to come here, to be the vessel for Magda’s magic that the Khun needed in order to become what you were meant to become.”
“What will you do now?” Astra asked. “Do you still intend to return home to Jasan?”
“No, I cannot return to Jasan as I am, now. I will leave tomorrow, but what I’ll do after that, I don’t yet know.”
“Why?”
“Why?”
“Yes, why must you leave?” Astra asked. “Please stay with us, Tani. There are many people here who will welcome you, and who love you.”
“You might welcome me, Astra, but I don’t think you can speak for…everyone else. I’ve no doubt that there will be at least one person, and probably more, who’ll be relieved to see the back of me.”
“I’m not so sure about that,” Astra said slowly.
Tani set her cup down a little harder than she meant to. “I’m sorry, Astra, but I’ve done all that I promised, and more, for the Khun. I’ve nothing more to offer.”
Astra heard the note of finality in Tani’s voice and nodded in reluctant acceptance. Tani stood and excused herself, then went to her sleeping chamber to be alone.
Chapter 11
Tani stood alone on the mesa, nearly swearing aloud when she heard Steel climb up behind her. She hadn’t seen him since leaving the mine the day before, and that was the way she wanted it. He’d visited Astra’s cave when he and the others had returned from the mine in the Stray, but she’d remained in her guest chamber, pretending to sleep until long after he left. She’d stayed in her chamber that morning, too, knowing that Steel would show up early, though she couldn’t understand why. She’d thought and thought about it, but couldn’t come up with a single reason for him wanting to see her. Since she was leaving anyway, she decided that it didn’t really matter. She had far more important matters to focus on now.
When he’d finally given up and left the cave that morning, she’d left her room, still wearing her own clothing from the day before. After the eventful day she’d had, and the restless night, her clothes were rumpled and dusty but she couldn’t make herself care. Once she was aboard the Ugaztun she could take a bath and change into her own clothes. She would take nothing with her when she left Garza save for Wily, and that only because Wily had made it clear that he wanted to go with her.
Astra had tried to convince her to speak with Steel, but after declining twice, she refused to respond further. She’d said farewell to Astra, then gone to see Dirk one last time. Wily stayed for a last visit after she promised not to leave Garza without him, and then she climbed up to the mesa. She turned on the beacon that Khurda had loaned her, set it down, then stepped back to wait. She’d hoped that the Khun would let her go in peace. Apparently Steel wanted to have the last word.
“Astra told me that you’re leaving now,” he said quietly.
“Yes.”
“Without saying goodbye?”
“I said goodbye to Astra, and to Dirk.”
“Not to me,” Steel said.
Tani looked at him in surprise before she could stop herself, then looked away again. “I thought my absence would be all you’d want or need.”
Steel took a deep breath, accepting the pain her words caused him, knowing she hadn’t meant to cause pain. She’d spoken only what she believed to be the truth. “Thank you for saving my life, Tani.”
She didn’t want to think about that, didn’t want to remember the sheer agony she’d felt when she’d thought he would die. “Did Magda’s magic cause a change in your alter form?” she asked.
“We do not yet know,” he said. “The Khun have agreed not to shift until the one person responsible for delivering so many gifts to our people can be there to share it with us.”
“I’m leaving,” she said, ruthlessly tamping down the thin thread of hope that sprang up. It was not Steel, but his people, that wanted her, and that just wasn’t enough.
“If you leave, then we will go forward without you,” he said. “We just wanted you to know that we’d prefer that you remain with us.”
Tani turned around to face him, shifting her gaze so that she was looking out over the valley below, the words she’d been about to speak dying in her throat. “Have you thought about leaving this world, Steel? Just taking what’s left of your people and going somewhere else, where the Nomen and whoever creates them can’t find you?”
“Yes,” Steel said. “We’ve thought about it a lot. It’s the smart thing to do. For some reason, we can’t seem to make ourselves agree to do that and we don’t know why. This world isn’t really ours. We were brought here against our will, enslaved here, forced to work for someone else’s benefit. We know that the Nomen will probably be back with bigger weapons, and we’ll all end up in the mine or dead. And yet, we cannot bring ourselves to abandon Garza.”
“Then you will need more power and more strength to withstand the Nomen the next time they come,” she said. “Make no mistake, Steel, they will come back. They want that metal and I have a feeling they’ll do just about anything to get it.”
“I was thinking about that,” Steel said. “I remember reading somewhere that there are many mines on Jasan.”
“Yes, that’s true,” she said. “Why?”
“Because if this metal is so rare that no one in the Thousand Worlds knows of it, and so useful that the Xanti, and now someone else, wants it so badly, then wouldn’t it be valuable?”
“Yes,” she said. “I don’t know for sure of course, but that’s my guess. It’s an excellent idea, Steel. You could choose to mine the metal yourselves and sell it, or you could sell the right to mine it to another world or company with a condition that they handle the security. Then the Khun could relax and live in peace. My parents will know how to do this. ICARUS will as well.”
“Good,” Steel said. “We don’t know enough about these things to negotiate any sort of deal, but your level of honor and courage are enough to convince me that the Khun could trust no one more than the Jasani.”
“Your trust would not be misplaced,” Tani said.
“I have one more question,” Steel said, wishing she would look at him.
“Yes?”
“Can a dragon love a mahrac? If so, can she love him enough to forgive him, even though he’s proved himself unworthy of both her love and her forgiveness? Can she love him enough to give him another chance to make it up to her, even if it takes the rest of eternity?”
Tani crossed her arms over her chest as though to keep her racing heart in place. Then, finally, she looked directly into his eyes, searching. “That’s three questions.”
“Can a dragon love a mahrac enough to overlook the fact that he can’t count?” he asked with a hopeful expression that reminded her very much of Dirk.
Her lips twitched in the beginnings of a smile that died when she thought about the choices before her, and the consequences of choosing wrong. Making up her mind, she grabbed hold of h
er courage and leapt into the abyss. “I don’t know about dragons and mahracs,” she said slowly. “But I’ve loved you from the moment I first saw you, and that was before I became dragon and before I knew you were mahrac. My feelings haven’t changed, nor will they. But I can’t change the fact that I wasn’t born Khun any more than I can change the fact that I was born Clan Jasani and yet don’t belong with them. I don’t know who, or even what I am any more, or where I belong.”
“I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you, too, Tani,” Steel said. “I know that I’m woefully unworthy of you. I’m more sorry than I can say for the cruel things I said to you, and I’m even sorrier that I chose to believe in Naran over you. I swear to you, here and now, that I will never betray you in any way ever again. I wish I could promise to never say anything stupid again too, but as you know, stupid things fall out of my mouth all too often. But I can promise that I’ll never say anything quite that stupid again. I don’t deserve you, Tani Dracon. But I love you with every particle of my being.” He smiled. “The Khun don’t deserve you either, but they also love you. This is where you belong, Tani. Here, with us.”
“You think your people love me?” she asked, avoiding the more important questions for a moment. He’d said all the right things, but could she believe him?
“I know they do. In fact, if I can’t convince you to stay here, marry me, and be our Queen, I’ll probably be stripped of my hereditary rank and banished. There’ve been a few suggestions that Dirk would make a better king than I.”
“Hmmm…so, your future is in my hands,” Tani said, tapping her chin thoughtfully.
“More importantly, my heart and soul are in your hands.”
Tani saw hope on Steel’s face, and love in his eyes, but she needed more this time. “Steel, I need you to tell me straight out what it is that you want,” she said. “Don’t hint, don’t make me guess, and don’t be cryptic. There is more at stake here than you know, so be absolutely honest.” She paused, took a deep breath, and said the one thing she most did not want to say. “You owe me the truth, Steel.”
“I do,” he agreed, looking at her searchingly. “What don’t I know?”
“You first,” she said.
“That’s fair,” he said. “I want you to marry me, Tani. I want you to stay here on Garza as my queen, help me learn to be a good king so that, together, we can lead the Khun into a better, brighter future. Or, let me leave with you if you don’t want to remain here. I want us to be together, and it doesn’t matter where we are. I want to love you for all time, and I want you to love me back the same way. Is that clear enough?”
Tani smiled, her heart suddenly feeling as though it had developed wings of its own and was going to soar into the heavens all by itself. “Yes, Steel, that’s clear enough.”
Steel threw his head back and laughed, the first truly carefree laugh she’d ever heard from him. Then he picked her up and swung her around in a circle before pulling her close and lowering his mouth to hers. She parted her lips for him, sighing inwardly as his unique flavor filled her mouth and his scent set fire to her blood. She pressed her body tighter against him as he deepened the kiss, thrusting his tongue gently into her mouth. She moaned and the thrusts picked up speed. Her hands tightened on his shoulders as her body prepared itself for him.
“Well, this certainly isn’t what we expected to see when we got here,” a woman’s voice said, startling them both. Steel immediately set Tani on her feet and pushed her behind him before looking to see who’d spoken. His mahrac raised its head, not quite taking over, but close in case it was needed. Steel was momentarily startled by the speed and power he sensed from his mahrac, but he didn’t let himself get sidetracked.
He studied the four intruders who’d suddenly materialized on the mesa. The woman looked so much like Tani that they could have been sisters except that her hair was very long. Three very big men with long black hair stood behind her, massive arms crossed over equally massive chests. They were identical except for the color of their slashing eyes, which were all fixed fiercely on him. He sensed a slight approval from them for putting Tani behind him, but it was nowhere near enough for him to let his guard down.
“Mom!” Tani shouted, and ran out from behind him too quickly for him to catch her. She crossed the distance between them in a flash and threw her arms around her mother’s neck, hugging her tightly. After a moment she released her mother and hugged each of the giants who, Steel now realized, must be her fathers.
After she’d hugged her parents, she held her hand out toward him, so he approached warily. His mahrac sensed that all four of these people, including the woman that Tani introduced as Princess Nahoa-Arima Lariah, were extremely powerful, but it wasn’t wary of them. After the introductions were finished, Steel bowed to them.
“As the leader of what remains of my people, the Khun, I welcome you to Garza,” he said formally.
“We’re sorry we couldn’t arrive sooner,” Garen Dracon said, studying the man who so obviously loved their youngest daughter. “We’re also sorry that your requests for aid to ICARUS went unanswered. We have people investigating that matter as we speak.”
“They need to look for controllers, Ata, as well as Nomen,” Tani said.
“What are Nomen?” Val asked.
“They are…constructs, Popi,” Tani said, frowning. “Clones that have been altered in size, and enhanced with bio-tronic parts. Sometimes they behave as machines, without emotion, and other times they behave as humans. I believe they all have controllers that are activated at different times, which would mean more advanced controllers than those used by the Xanti.”
“We would see these Nomen,” Trey said. “Where can we find them?”
“There are no more alive on Garza, but I can take you to what remains of them,” Tani said.
“That’s unfortunate,” Trey said.
“Actually, there is one yet alive, currently under Marbic’s control,” Steel said to Tani. “It’s locked in one of the Nomen’s bunkhouses at the mine compound.” He turned to look at Tani’s parents and told them the truth. “With the aid of a man who I believed to be one of my best friends, the Nomen abducted Tani yesterday and placed her in a hibernation pod,” Steel said. “Their intention was to take her somewhere to have a controller implanted in her head. We destroyed what was left of them, save for one. I will not apologize for that.”
“Nor would I expect you to, Ganzorig Khaan,” Trey said with a bow and a little smile. “We thank you for preventing such an abomination from being perpetrated against our daughter.”
“As I saved her, so too did she save me,” Steel said, smiling down at Tani.
All of the Dracons looked to Tani, who suddenly looked distinctly uncomfortable. Sensing her worry, Steel reached out to touch her shoulder lightly. “Khalute?”
She looked up at him, pleading in her eyes, and for once he understood her as she so often understood him. “I will go and speak to the Khun, Tani,” he said, speaking to her alone. “I will tell them about our idea concerning the mine. Perhaps you should take your parents to the compound so that they can see what is left of the Nomen, and Brutus.”
“That’s a good idea, Steel,” she said, relieved. “Thank you.”
Steel nearly gasped in surprise when she went up on her toes and kissed him on the jaw. He smiled and kissed her back, then turned to face the Dracons. “If you will excuse me, I must see to my people, and I’m sure you’d like some time alone with your daughter.”
“Of course, Ganzorig Khaan,” Garen said.
“Please, Highness, call me Steel,” he replied. He touched Tani lightly on the cheek with his fingertips, then turned and walked away, disappearing over the edge of the cliff.
“You have much to tell us, Daughter,” Lariah said softly, her eyes dancing.
“I do,” Tani said. “And I’m very afraid that you’re not going to like any of it.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because I’m…dif
ferent now.”
Val approached Tani and wrapped his arms around her. “We know that, little one,” he said into her hair. “We sense the difference, of course. But you’re well, and happy, and at the moment, quite safe. Those are the things that matter to us.”
“Thank you, Popi,” Tani said, hugging him tightly.
“Will you tell us what happened?” Lariah asked.
“Yes Mom,” Tani said, then took a deep breath. “I guess the first thing I need to tell you is that I’m not berezi.”
“Yes, Tani, we know,” Garen said.
Tani’s eyes widened in surprise, then narrowed in anger, surprising her parents. “This makes you angry?” Lariah asked.
“Well, yes, it does,” Tani said. “That information was supposed to be private.”
Lariah laughed. “That’s wonderful!” she said, hugging Tani hard. “I’ve worried for so long about your inability to get angry. It’s an enormous relief to see it now.”
“Well, I’ll explain all that too, but first, how did you find out?”
“Your sisters told us several days ago,” Trey said, then held one hand up when Tani’s eyes started to glow, grinning even more widely than Lariah. “Don’t be angry with them. They told us because they believed that whatever was happening to you was your destiny, and they wanted us to understand that.”
Tani nodded. “Yes, all right, I would have probably done the same thing in their place.” She looked at her parents’ faces and frowned. “You aren’t bothered by it?”
“We were shocked, of course, but we’ve had time to get used to the idea,” Lariah said. “After giving it some thought we realized that it explained a few things we’d wondered about. Right now though, we’d like to hear your story.”
Tani nodded, then began speaking. Once she started, the words flowed quickly, though she left out the part where she shifted into a dragon, not wanting the shock of that news to overshadow the rest. When she was finished, the Dracons were silent for a long moment, absorbing all that she’d told them.
“So that’s why Riata wanted you to have that necklace,” Lariah said softly. “To strengthen your latent talent for healing.”
Tani's Destiny (Hearts of ICARUS Book 2) Page 31