I put on a sad face, which seemed to take her off the scent for now at least, and watched as she turned to the door. Again, just as with the last time, she left without uttering another word.
I hurried and removed the note, and in it’s place wrote another more innocent one. I’m not sure why I went to the trouble, but again my instincts had taken over and it was better safe than sorry.
I did not fully grasp the consequences of our little meeting being found out, but I had the feeling it wouldn’t be good. Now that we’d spoken, the prince and I, now that I was no longer thinking of muddying up my chances, the day’s events took on new meaning.
Like the Empress’s questions, the look on her face that I’d dismissed as a royal lady’s innate nature, now took on new meaning. On the other hand, his father had seemed nice from behind the curtain and his mother had sent me sweets.
Which I now sat down to enjoy after hiding the note in the little pouch I wore hidden beneath my clothing. Right next to the knife I kept there as well.
It’s been a bother to remember to remove it before the court ladies come to undress me, but so far I’ve been careful.
I nibbled a honey cake as my mind wandered to him once again. What are the odds that we would meet like that my very first day here? Was it providence, fate…
Prince Jai
I felt like a little boy as I tied the ribbon around her gift. Never before have I wondered whether someone would like something I gave them. That was always a given.
Now as I wrapped the rare book of classical poems, the only one in the kingdom since it had been translated from another language and has been kept in the Crown Prince’s library for the past five hundred years or so, I felt nervous.
“Your Highness, that is the third time…” I scowled up at him and he rolled his eyes and took a step back.
“I have to get it right.”
“Why didn’t you ask one of the court ladies to help?”
“I have to do it myself. Did you hear back from the servants?” I’d sent him to check on Mia a little while ago. Now that we’d met and she knows who I am, I’m even more frantic for this whole ordeal to come to an end.
I’m deathly afraid that something might go wrong and snatch her away from me.
“Oh yes, it is said that she was very pleased if a little surprised by your mother’s sweet gesture but…”
I continued tying and retying the bow only looking up when he took too long to continue. “But? What is it? Is something wrong?” He shifted his eyes away and played with his fingers, which only raised my anxiety.
“Princess Rowena was in her quarters when the court ladies delivered the desserts. Now, now Your Highness, there’s no need to panic.” He held his hand out to stop me from leaving the room.
I didn’t want her anywhere near beauty. “Why was she there?” Princes Rowena! She may be the same age as my beauty but there the similarities between the two ended.
One was beyond fair to look at, with a smart mouth and a gentle disposition, while the other used enhancements to appear more beautiful than she actually was.
And there is no way she could hide the fact that she was her father’s daughter. Greed and malice shines from her very eyes. I distrusted her on sight the first time we met and that hasn’t changed in the years since.
I know well what that family is like and have never considered them part of mine, though her father is brother to mine.
It was his treatment of my own brother Prince Javan coupled with the rumors of his past actions concerning my father that had built up my distrust of him,
My father’s older brother is a man of great ambition, with no claim to the throne, but he’s always seeking one. Lately he’s found in me a likely target.
As the Empress’s father he would become the internal prince. The one who rules when the Emperor is away from the palace.
But first he’d have to get me on the throne, which would mean eliminating my father, who knows what he is and hates him relentlessly.
I knew and understood all these things because I kept careful watch and listened where I ought not to. It was my extensive study of our nation’s past that made me open my eyes and ears from a very young age. It’s the reason I avoid him and his daughter vehemently.
I know that he has people keeping watch as well, he and his mother the Empress. But I’ve been smarter than both of them thus far, never giving anything away.
Because of my father’s near death and destruction, I’ve learned not to trust or when and who it was safe to. For this reason I’ve learned to keep my own counsel.
Though outwardly it may appear that I am a child that can be easily led, I more often than not follow my own mind rather than adhere to the teachings of the many sycophants who latch onto me like leeches
So far I’ve been able to keep the Empress’s plants fooled, but the stakes were high and I won’t have my princess hurt by their corruption and greed.
“I must see father again…take this to her first.” I passed him the old treasure wrapped in my official giftwrap paper with my seal and another hidden note inside.
“Eunuch Van, be careful.” He nodded his head and left leaving me to pace in worry. What could Princess Rowena possibly want with her? I haven’t forgotten how she’d drawn her away that night of the banquet.
I didn’t wait for eunuch Van to return before leaving to go see my father. Of course there were still a number of people left in my retinue to follow after me.
My parents were together in mother’s palace when I found them. My son, whatever’s the matter?” Mother rose from her seat and approached me, placing her hand on my brow. “Are you ill?”
I shook my head and rushed to my father’s side. “Father, Princess Rowena…”
“I know, I’ve already taken care of it.”
“Can’t we move Lady Mia?”
“No son that would not be at all proper. Stop worrying, it’s only a few more days before the final selection. Surely you can hold your composure that long.”
“Yes, you’re right, sorry. It’s just…”
“I know what you’re going to say, but I’ve already foreseen everything and have taken all the necessary steps. Do not fear, your princess is safe here.”
I nodded my head in understanding even though inside I was a bundle of nerves. I didn’t understand the sudden fear that climbed up my throat, but the thought of my beauty at the mercy of those people left me cold.
MIA
I had to walk away from the table of sweets less I made myself sick. But it was such a waste. No doubt they would be thrown out. I had a sudden thought and opened the door to find the court ladies standing watch outside.
“Will you all come in here please?” They looked at each other before nodding their heads yes and followed me into the room. “I would like to share these sweets with all of you since it’s way too much for me to finish.”
Their looks of surprise were followed by refusals but I wouldn’t hear of it. Before they knew what was afoot I had them all seated on the floor cushions around the table, each with a delicacy in hand.
To ease the tension I started up a general conversation, asking about the palace, something I knew they would be comfortable discussing and I was right.
There was a knock at the door and I got up to answer amidst their protests. Too late, I remembered that I wasn’t at home and these things just weren’t done here.
“Eunuch Van.” I smiled genuinely and received a warm smile in return before he held out the neatly wrapped present in his hand. He looked over my shoulder at the scene and I rushed to explain lest I get the court ladies in trouble.
“Oh, the Crown Princess Consort sent over some sweets, but they were too much for me alone, so I’ve shared with the ladies.” He smiled again and bowed before taking his leave.
I looked at the gift and felt a sweet tingle in my chest even before I knew what it was. I didn’t open it right away, wanting to save that pleasure for when I was alone
. Instead I rejoined the ladies at the table.
The conversation soon changed as they relaxed and became more comfortable in my presence and it was all about my favor. Apparently there was already a rumor started that I was the chosen favorite among the final three.
My face was beet red by the time they left to return to their posts. I waited until the coast was clear to unwrap the gift and my sigh of pleasure could not be contained.
I held the rare book up delicately, almost afraid to turn the page. I’d only heard of this book and had long yearned to read it. How could he possibly have known?
There was a note on the first page that fell into my lap as soon as I opened it up. I smiled again as I read it. “I thought as a well read lady this would be of interest. When we meet again we can discuss our favorite passages. Love J.”
I grinned like a simpleton, the way I’d seen many of the other young ladies who’d been part of the selection do in the past few weeks. I’d found their behavior a bit childish and annoying, now here I was doing the same.
I ran my fingers lightly over the book’s cover, soft as tissue paper after many years of use and settled down to read. The servants had been in and out lighting candles, bringing me dinner, but I never picked my head up from the book so engrossed was I.
I put it away when my eyes grew tired and long after the court ladies had ordered me to bed. I had yet to come down from my joy and excitement over the gift. It was silly to be this moved by his thoughtfulness, but I confess that I was.
Of all the things he could’ve sent me, this was the perfect choice. It surprised me that he knew me so well already and that he’d even gone to such lengths. I replayed all the time we’d spent with each other, between the first time and this and could find no fault in him.
And that easily the decision was made. Though I didn’t expect all my days to be like this, it was indeed, a good start. Not one of my past suitors had ever done more than comment on my beauty as if that was all there was to me.
None as far as I knew had ever taken the time to learn the tiniest little thing about me. But he had gone out of his way and made the perfect choice with his first try.
That night I fell asleep with a smile on my face and dreams in my heart. Everything had changed in a day and now I looked forward to the next, no longer dreading it.
For the next few days we exchanged notes back and forth, mine mostly of thanks for the little tokens he sent me each morning. The notes started up a longing in me, a longing to see him again.
But I accepted his explanation that we’d already tempted fate by meeting that one time and so must be more careful going forward.
The fact that he ended each note with until we meet again love J, went a long way to easing the ache of loneliness that had appeared from nowhere.
I didn’t even resent the hard work that I was called upon to do for the last leg of the selection process, and just flew through the many steps with my head in the clouds.
His daily notes accompanied by some little token had come to be the focal point of my days and so the rigorous process no longer grated on my nerves.
Now I did my best because I wanted to win. Though I was still myself even as the Empress found fault with my every move and action, I was almost certain of my victory.
I never got another visit from Princess Rowena though the other girl’s eyes still followed me whenever we were in the same room.
And by the eve of the last day she was no longer hiding her displeasure, it was plainly written on her face for all to see.
No matter, I’d figured out the situation and knew that for all intents and purposes she saw me as her rival. I could understand that.
It was obvious that she had feelings for the Prince even if he held none for her. And I wondered if he knew or even cared. It was only the night before the final selection process that my nerves got the better of me and I found it hard to sleep.
What if now that I’ve decided I want him, things go awry? What if something goes wrong and I’m not the one chosen? I was a bundle of nerves and angst when the knock came at the door.
Prince Jai
“How is she?” I was more nervous now that we were at an end than I’d been the whole of this past week. For the past few days I’ve been sending eunuch Van back and forth to keep track of the selection.
Each day he’d return with news of my beauty and how well she was doing. Giving me hope that all would go well.
That first night after he came back with news of her kindness towards the ladies of the court, my admiration had grown tenfold.
Her actions were another sign that I had been right to choose her. It’s too easy for one in a position of power to mistreat those beneath them.
As someone who’s always thought the opposite should be the way, it did my heart good to know that the girl I’d fallen in love with was of the same mind.
“She seemed as nervous as you are Your Highness. But she seemed to lighten a bit after I gave it to her. Now it’s time for you to turn in as well…”
“How can I when she’s so nervous and probably afraid? What did she say? Did you wait for her to open it? Why didn’t you wait until she’d opened it?” I ignored his latest disrespectful habit of rolling his eyes whenever I spoke and continued to pace anxiously.
“I didn’t hang around because you warned me a hundred times to be careful and discreet. She said thank you and smiled prettily at me.” I glared at him there the oaf.
I’d been sending her books and other things suited to a scholar, but this last night I’d given into my romantic nature where she’s concerned and sent something more suitable.
I hadn’t thought the gift inappropriate at the time. No then, in the moment, it seemed like the perfect thing. It carried great significance and anyone who saw it would know the meaning. That’s exactly what I’d wanted when it entered my mind to do it, but now I was not so sure.
It was the necklace my grandfather had gifted my grandmother upon their engagement. The heart shaped fire red ruby the size of a bird’s egg sat in the center of brilliant diamonds.
It was meant to convey eternal love and at the time fifty years or so ago when grandfather had had it made, had been lauded for its beauty.
It was my grandmother’s favorite piece. Even when she became Empress, it’s said she wore it more often than anything else.
It had been one of the many things gifted to me at her passing, even though I was way too young back then to know or even care about such things.
I didn’t have to stretch my imagination to know why I’d thought of giving it to my beauty. Who else could be more deserving? My wish is that she’d get the same joy and pleasure from it as grandmother once had.
The necklace was part of a set, which included a tiara and a matching ring. The blood red rubies surrounded by diamonds had looked like hearts aflame in the candlelight. I found it an appropriate depiction of the two of us and the budding love that we had found for each other.
Tonight I’d sent her only the necklace, while keeping the rest of the set in my possession to gift to her on the day of our wedding. It sounded like a good plan at the time.
Now my heart raced as I worried she might find the gift too forward. The heart is a symbol of longevity between lovers. Just as my grandfather had hoped for when he had the pieces made for his one true love, I was telling my love that I wished for us the same.
“Do you think the necklace was too much? My Princess doesn’t seem to put much stock in such things.” Again he rolled his eyes as he came forward to help me undress for the night.
“I’m sure with her intelligence she’ll get the significance of your gift Your Highness. And besides, it’s a bit late to be worrying about it now isn’t it?”
“Insolent wretch! Why didn’t you stop me then? I knew it was too much, too forward.”
“Relax Your Highness, I’m just pulling your leg. It was a most thoughtful gift.” I stood still with my arms stretched to the sides as he removed my
robes.
“No matter the woman, a nice jewel once in a while especially one with such significant meaning, is always appreciated.” His words relaxed me somewhat though I still wished I could’ve seen her face myself or at the very least gleaned her reaction through him had he stayed.
I was finally able to go to bed, but still sleep was not quick to follow. I tossed and turned until the early hours of the morning and jumped out of bed just as the sun begun its rise.
“Eunuch Van!” It has been some time since I yelled his name like that. Not since I was a boy of ten or thereabouts. He entered the room half flustered, sleep still heavy in his eyes.
“Your Highness!” I also ignored his put upon tone and rushed towards the bathing room. “Today’s the day, we must hurry. I’ve already talked father into letting me watch the proceedings from the same hiding place as before.”
“Yes, but that’s not for another few hours hence Your Highness.”
“Would you stop arguing with me and help me disrobe you wretch?”
He opened his mouth to argue but I stopped him in his tracks. “One more word out of you and I’ll send you to the office of punishment.” He rushed forward all helpfulness.
“No need to make a fuss, I’m here.” Of course he knew I didn’t mean it but he knows enough not to test the waters. The last time I almost escaped and father had him sent there he hadn’t sat for a week.
“How do you think it will go? Do you think my beauty will do well?” So far she had outshone the other two. I learned this not only from father and mother, but also by listening in on the servants as they gossiped.
It warmed me more than ever to hear them sing her praise and yes, the servants’ words were just as important. She’ll be the mistress of my palace one day and it was good that they had already grown a fondness for her.
“She has been doing quite well so far Your Highness. I see no reason why today should be any different.” His insolence knows no bounds.
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