In a way she found it quite hurtful that Keri accepted these strangers so easily into her young life. It felt strange after being the centre of the baby's world to suddenly find herself so easily replaced, strange and just a little frightening. If Keri became too independent of her love Leon might consider she was no longer necessary. Her heart constricted painfully at the thought and her face paled. She couldn't lose Keri, she just couldn't!
Lucy saw her suddenly strained face and picking up Keri from the floor she walked over to the door. 'I think I should take Keri back to her room now, it's almost time for her nap anyway.'
'And mine,' laughed Templar. 'Don't worry, Lucy, I'm not going to have a relapse. I'll be up and about again in a couple of days and able to relieve you of some of Keri's care.'
'I've been fine, honestly.'
'I know,' Templar nodded. 'But if the truth be known I miss the little bundle of mischief.' She cleared the slight catch in her throat. 'Very much,' she added softly.
She stared sightlessly at the ceiling after Lucy had left with the baby. She would go mad if she had to spend much more time in this room on her own. But the doctor had said she had to stay in bed another few days. Well, she wouldn't! She wouldn't stay here a moment longer. Perhaps if Leon had made some effort to see her she might have suffered this convalescence, but not if she was going to be kept here out of the way like something he could forget existed if she was out of sight. Well, she wasn't going to be out of sight much longer!
She swung her long legs over the side of the bed, pushing the restricting covers back irritably. She would get up for lunch and surprise Leon. It would certainly surprise him! He must imagine he was almost a bachelor again. She would soon disillusion him about that.
She put her feet firmly on the floor and pushed herself up. Goodness, her legs felt terribly wobbly! And the bathroom door suddenly seemed very far away.
It seemed to take her an age to reach the pale blue door, but she finally got there, clasping on the door handle as if it were a lifeline. Perhaps this wasn't such a good idea after all. But, oh dear, it seemed to be an even longer way back. She swayed on her feet, her head swimming dizzily. It was no good, she would have to get back to the bed. She wouldn't be able to dress herself, let alone present herself before Leon as a healthy young woman.
Perhaps if she held on to the stool in front of the dressing-table and then moved on to the wardrobe she might be able to get back that way. It was a longer way back to the bed than just walking straight across the room, but it seemed safer in the long run.
She made the small distance to the stool, but the wardrobe suddenly seemed very far away and it took her a few minutes to get the strength together to make the second effort. Well, it was now or never; she couldn't stay here all day and she certainly wasn't going to call out for Leon. That would be too humiliating.
She took one hesitant step forward, only to feel herself losing her balance, the floor coming towards her fast. The stool fell over with a clatter and Templar landed with a loud thud beside it. Tears of indignation welled up in her stricken eyes and she gazed sorrowfully at the door, waiting inevitably for someone to arrive. It was too much to hope that no one had heard the noise.
Her instincts were correct and a couple of second later Leon came bursting into the room. He took in the situation at a glance, dismissing the staff who had gathered around the doorway, coming down on his haunches beside Templar as she looked away from him.
'What happened?' he demanded.
She still couldn't look at him, although she tried to wipe away the tears of frustration that still stood on her lushed cheeks. 'I fell over,' she whispered.
'I realise that,' Leon returned tersely, grasping her forearms to pull her to her feet. He swung her effortlessly up into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest. 'What I want to know is what you were doing out of bed in the first place. You know you were supposed to stay in bed for another few days. Doctor's orders,' he said firmly.
Templar quivered against him, completely unnerved by the warmth exuded by his body so close to her own. The tears still shimmered in her eyes, spilling over and falling down her cheeks as she looked down at the open neck of his tan-coloured shirt. A fine mat of dark hairs could be seen there and she looked away again quickly. 'Please don't be cross with me, Leon,' she pleaded softly. Please!'
The dark head bent and a pair of grey-blue eyes looked intently down at her. Templar blushed under that searching gaze, looking back at him shyly, aware of her auburn hair splayed out across his chest. 'I was not going to be cross with you,' Leon denied gently. I merely wondered why you had been so silly as to get out of bed against the doctor's wishes—and mine, I might add.'
'I realise it was against yours,' she said quietly, adding nothing more.
'What do you mean?' he frowned.
'I know you don't like to be reminded of my existence, but I just couldn't stay up here on my own another moment longer. It's so lonely.'
For a long moment he was silent, still holding her tightly against him. 'I—' he hesitated. 'I have never said I wished you did not exist, on the contrary, if you did not exist then neither would Keri, and you know how we both love her. Indeed, I am very grateful to you for giving me such a beautiful child.'
'But you—you haven't been to see me at all, except when you accompanied the doctor,' she accused.
He raised a dark eyebrow. 'Did you want me to? If I remember correctly you professed a wish for me not to bother you with my belated attentions.'
'You know you remember correctly!' she said hotly.-'But you should also remember that I wasn't feeling well at the time and obviously said things I didn't mean.'
Leon grinned down at her. 'What you said that day did not seem so very different from what you usually say. I have become used to you scolding me. I have not visited you because I did not want to upset you as I usually seem to do when I come near you.'
She looked at him suspiciously. 'Was that the only
reason? I know you don't like me, but I '
'Templar!' he snapped warningly, placing her gently on the bed and pulling the covers up over her thinly clad body as she ineffectually tried to do so herself. He sat down on the side of the bed. 'I have never said such a thing. You have a way of putting words into my mouth that are totally false. I have explained why I have not been up to see you, but if it will please you I will sit with you for a while. Would you like that?'
'Mm,' she nodded her head shyly. 'If you're sure I'm not keeping you from something else——'
'Not something or someone,' Leon interrupted, standing up to bring her bedroom chair next to the bed. 'Now tell me how you are feeling?'
'I'm all right now, thank you, Leon.' She laughed slightly, a catch in her throat. 'And to think I was going to come downstairs and show you how well I am!'
'Now I can see how well you are here. I have made
the arrangements for our holiday and- '
'Holiday!' burst out Templar. 'I told you I didn't want to go on holiday.'
'And I told you that we were going,' her husband insisted. 'And you know that I always have my own way in such things.'
'You're very arrogant, Leon,' she said tartly. 'It isn't something that I desired in a husband.'
He grinned at her again. 'I am sorry if it does not please you. I have always been so.'
'Well, it isn't something to be proud of,' reprimanded Templar, wondering at her own audacity. 'And I still say I won't go on this holiday. I couldn't leave Keri.'
'I informed the doctor of this and I am afraid he was rather shocked by my even thinking he meant us to leave the baby behind. I think I shocked his sensibilities,' Leon chuckled wryly. 'I should have remembered that the English very rarely leave the care of their children to other people. Your reaction to my suggestion of a nanny for Keri should have been enough to remind me.'
'Surely you wouldn't like to leave her behind? I'm sure you would find it rather tiresome to entertai
n me.'
Leon's eyes darkened to a deep blue, his look unreadable in its intensity. 'I would not have found it tiresome at all. On the contrary, it may have proved— interesting.'
She looked away in confusion. 'And now?'
'Now we are taking the baby with us.'
'Where will we be going?'
'I have a villa in France. It will do admirably for our needs. A couple are in residence there all the year round and they take care of my needs when I go there. Lucy can accompany us to help in the caring of the baby. I am sure Keri will enjoy her holiday enormously, she has a way of enjoying everything.'
For the first time since Leon had entered her bedroom Templar smiled confidently. 'She's a very happy child. And she's much more contented since we've lived here.'
'Since you married me,' Leon corrected. 'No matter how much you try to forget it I am afraid it is an inescapable fact.'
'Did you have to get on to that subject?' she cut in shortly. 'I was quite enjoying our little chat, and now you've spoilt it all.'
'I'm sorry.' He stood up instantly. 'I am sorry to have this effect on you. I will leave you before I distress you any more.'
'You're not sorry at all! You do it on purpose, just so that I won't forget my place.'
'And just what do you think your place is?'
'You already know my views on that.'
'You are my wife! Do not forget it!'
'Don't talk to me like that! I don't have to take it from you or anyone else.'
'You are becoming over-excited, Templar,' he snapped. 'As I had expected, my coming here has upset you. You must try and calm yourself.'
'I'm not a child, Leon, so don't treat me as one. But I do think you should go. I'm glad you came to visit me and I thank you for helping me when I fell over, but I'm tired now. I'm afraid I'm not as recovered as I thought I was.'
He gave a slight inclination of his arrogant head. 'Very well. But if you desire me to visit you again perhaps it would be as well if you told Lucy to inform me. I would not like to visit you against your wishes.'
Templar remained stubbornly silent and after a thoughtful look in her direction Leon quietly left the room. Oh how could he! He knew very well she wouldn't ask Lucy to tell him she wanted him to visit her. It would be too humiliating and he knew it. He knew it! Ooh, she could throw something!
When the doctor next came he agreed that she could start to get up now, but only in short stages. As soon as she tired she was to get straight back into bed. 'Flu wasn't something to be taken lightly as most people did, he reminded her darkly.
'My wife is very stubborn, I'm afraid,' commented Leon.
'Mm,' the doctor frowned deeply. 'In that case it would perhaps be better if Mrs. Marcose were carried downstairs and rested there every day. Company will aid. her recovery.'
'Then of course she must be taken downstairs,* agreed Leon.
Templar sat in frustrated silence as the two of them discussed her. It was intolerable of them to talk about her like this, as if she couldn't speak for herself.
True to his word Leon carried her effortlessly downstairs later in the afternoon. 'Thank you,' she smiled at him gratefully.
He raised haughty eyebrows at her softening of mood, picking up his jacket from a chair and shrugging his broad shoulders into the fine material. 'I will be home in time to take you back upstairs,' he said distantly.
'You're going out?' She hoped her disappointment wasn't too obvious to him.
'Obviously.'
'But where?'
'Do you think you have the right to question my movements?' he queried mildly, unknowingly very attractive in his dark trousers and the fine linen jacket that accentuated his darkness.
Templar's mouth tightened. 'Don't I?'
'Perhaps,' he admitted slowly. 'Perhaps if you did not behave like a shrew every time I talk to you.'
Her mouth trembled tearfully. 'I don't mean to,' she stumbled over the words.
'Then you should not do it,' Leon said unmercifully. 'I have tried to be kind to you since we have married, and at times I have thought I was making progress. But it appears we know each other no better than when we first married. If you miss the life you led before we met then I am sorry. But I cannot provide the physical part of our marriage that you obviously crave, and I do not recommend that you find someone else to do so. I will not tolerate any scandal attached to Keri's childhood.'
'What life are you saying I—I led?' she stuttered.
'Your different escorts and your relationships with them. I realise that once you have had those sort of— friendships it is difficult to no longer be able to do so.'
'I—I think you're being insulting, Leon!'
'I think perhaps I am too. But I cannot help it. I find it almost impossible to relate your past life with the girl I am now married to. As Keri's mother you are totally devoted, and yet you were not even sure who her father was,' he shook his head.
'But that wasn't-‘ Templar broke off. How could she possibly say it wasn't her fault!
'Was not what?' he queried.
'It isn't important. And I'm glad that I now know your opinion of me.'
'Did you ever doubt it?'
'No, I suppose not, although I mistakenly thought you were beginning to like me for myself.' She gave a harsh laugh. 'Silly, wasn't I?'
'Not silly at all. I have tried to treat you with the respect that Keri's mother deserves, in fact I have more than tried, and I believe at times I have succeeded. But the fact that I know your past precludes any closer friendship between the two of us. I cannot accept what your past life has been, and I have no intention of doing so.'
Templar's eyes darkened and she lowered her lids so that he shouldn't see the pain he was inflicting, either intentionally or unintentionally. 'You hate me, don't you?' she asked brokenly.
'I could never hate Keri's mother.'
'Perhaps not, but you hate me as a person.'
Leon's eyes narrowed angrily and stepping forward he took her narrow shoulders savagely in his hands and shook her roughly. 'I cannot hate you either,' he ground out harshly. 'I wish to God I did!'
Templar stared dazedly up into his dark saturnine
face, mesmerised by the harsh handsomeness of his
finely etched features. His flinty gaze passed slowly
over her big green eyes, over her tiny nose, and
lingered caressingly on her slightly parted mouth. His
eyes became startingly blue and Templar gasped at
the desire she saw in their depths. 'Leon, I '
'Silence!' he snapped. 'Be still!'
She was aware of the tight control he had over his
feelings and she stared at him in fascination. She had
hardly ever seen him lose his cool calmness, and to
realise that she was the reason for it was faintly exhilarating.
His fierce gaze was rapier-sharp and his hands tightened momentarily before he roughly pushed her away from him. 'Do you do it on purpose?' he demanded grimly.
'D—do what?'
'Do not be so innocent!' Leon said with disgust. 'You have been nothing but provocative since the first time we met, even going so far as to invade the privacy of my bedroom on one occasion.'
'For no other reason than to tell you your behaviour disgusted me!' Templar retorted hotly.
'No more than yours does me, believe me,' he bit out coldly. 'Perhaps now we have both made our opinions of each other perfectly clear you will learn to leave the subject alone. And me also.'
Templar gasped. 'Why, you—you—I wouldn't touch you if you were the last man on earth!'
'Good,' her husband said with finality. 'For once we are agreed. Goodbye!' The door slammed heavily behind him.
For long seconds Templar continued to stare at that closed door, then turning her body into the chair she began to shake with suppressed tears, allowing her un-happiness free rein.
CHAPTER FIVE
Te
mplar heaved a shuddering sigh, her face pale and drawn. Keri was fast asleep on her lap and seemed quite unconcerned by the time they had just spent in the air. Templar, always a bad traveller, had been a mass of nerves ever since they had set out for the airport this morning. She had felt even worse when she had realised Leon was to pilot the twelve-seater jet himself. Her eyes had widened with fear and apprehension and she had hesitated nervously about boarding the plane.
Leon had smiled at her mockingly. 'Come, Templar, I do not intend to toss you out over the ocean, convenient though that action may appear.'
Still she hung back, clinging desperately to the unconcerned Keri as she gurgled merrily to herself. 'But I—You don't really intend to fly this machine, do you, Leon? I mean, surely the airport officials wouldn't let you?'
He raised a haughty eyebrow. 'They can hardly prevent me from flying out my own property. Unless of course I am not qualified to do so, but I am, you see.'
His own plane! She ought to have guessed. And that he was a qualified pilot. Such a competent, self-confident man as he was would not let a little thing like obtaining a pilot's licence baulk him in attaining the experience and thrill of piloting himself wherever he wished to go.
'I see,' she licked her suddenly dry lips. 'Do we have to go on this holiday, Leon?' she begged.
His answer was to take her elbow in his firm grasp and forcefully take her into the luxury of the shiny silver plane's interior. 'Surely you are not admitting your fear to me. Templar? You who have always faced me so bravely and defiantly, no matter what I have accused you of, are surely not afraid of flying? Or is it the pilot that frightens you?'
'I—I've never liked flying.'
'So I do not frighten you?' he persisted.
'No, I have every confidence in you.' She placed Keri in the special cot provided for her. ‘I always have.'
Leon looked at her strangely but had not made any reply. He had then left her to enter the cockpit, laughing companionably with the man who was to be the co-pilot.
Templar had sat petrified throughout the whole of the flight, although they had hardly been in the air for any length of time, and Lucy had chattered to her in an attempt to divert her attention from her fear. The younger girl had turned out to be very understanding and although Templar could tell she loved her little charge she always managed to remember that Templar was the child's mother and so had the first claim to her attentions.
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