by Lexi Post
He brushed her hair back from her face. “It’s okay, Bea. We can get you help. They have rehab now for people with sex addictions.”
The slap to the back of his head caught him unawares. He rubbed the abused spot. “Hey, what was that for?”
Bea’s lips pursed and her brows drew down. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen her angry before.
“Because I’m not addicted to sex. I’m shocked you would believe such a thing just because Phillip wrote it.”
He squirmed when she put it that way. “Well, what was I supposed to think?”
She lowered her gaze and picked at the blanket. “I was going to tell you that night. Remember, my secret?”
“Your mom told us about the poisons. That’s why Josh was able to save you. Your mom and your grandmother both gave you blood infusions to balance the toxins in your body.” His hand curled tight of its own accord at what could have happened. “Your boyfriend Phillip gave you an antidote, all right. It wiped out all the poison in your body and it was too much.”
Bea covered his fisted hand with hers. “How much did she tell you?”
He tried to relax his hand, but the fact that someone had tried to kill Bea had his body fighting him. “She said you needed to tell me how you lived with the poison.”
Bea’s shoulders fell. “Oh.”
He leaned over and kissed her on the lips, then on her forehead. “It can wait. There are a dozen people worried about you. As much as I hate the thought of sharing you, I need to let them know you’re awake. Are you up for it?”
She took a deep breath and gave him a tentative smile. “I guess I have to face them eventually.”
* * * * *
Bea grinned as Kayla ushered in her next visitor.
Zach remained by her side. He had been very patient, but her time would come to tell him the facts. She wasn’t sure if he would think her worth keeping and her fear grew as the time lagged on.
Kayla started to close the door to the hospital room then stopped. “Fifteen minutes. I’ll be timing you.”
Jim Bellante waved her on. “That’s fine. It won’t take me long to say goodbye to my daughter.”
Bea glanced at Zach in question, but he shrugged.
Jim sat next to her bed. “Bea, I have to leave, now that I know you’ll recover. I need to return to my wife and family.”
She lost her grin. “But I haven’t seen you in almost a decade.” She couldn’t help the whine in her voice. This father had always been an enigma to her. She wanted to know him better.
He patted her hand. “I know, but I will always be here for you if you ever need me. I gave your friend out there all my contact information since it’s obvious your mother never did.”
Bea winced. Mom hadn’t fared well during this whole ordeal, both emotionally and in her family’s judgment. “Thank you so much for flying me here. Dr. Josh said I wouldn’t have made it if they’d driven me.”
He smiled. “I’m glad I could help. I would stay longer, but my children are much younger than you. Teenagers.” He said the word as if it explained everything.
He looked at Zach then back at her. “You, on the other hand, are grown and have someone quite capable of watching over you. Remember, anytime you need me or if you have big news, contact me.” He glanced at Zach again, making it clear he expected to hear something soon.
Bea twisted her fingers around her father’s hand. “I will, I promise.”
Jim stood and kissed her on the forehead, then spoke to Zach. “Take care of my girl.”
Zach rose and shook her dad’s hand. “I will.”
Bea’s heart hitched. She watched her dad leave then turned to Zach. “I wish he could have stayed longer. I don’t know anything about him.”
Zach took the seat her father had occupied. “Don’t you think you have enough family?”
At Zach’s raised eyebrow she laughed. “I guess you’re right. Some kids would hate having six fathers, but I’ve learned something from all of them. From Charlie I learned patience and common sense. You know I didn’t inherit those traits from my mom.”
Zach nodded in agreement.
“From Tony, I became good at math. He always helped me with my homework. Andy taught me to relax and appreciate the little things, like the mourning doves at sunrise. He also taught me how to organize my time to get as much done as possible so I could enjoy life. Mathew showed me how to see the positive in every situation, which I needed with my, ah, condition.” She nibbled at her lip. She still had to tell Zach how she lived with her poisons.
He squeezed her hand. “What about Gerry? Can we forget about him?”
She whipped her attention to his face to find a giant smirk. He wasn’t serious, though she wouldn’t blame him, considering the blue bruise coloring the right side of his jaw. “Actually, Gerry did teach me a few things. He taught me not to judge those different from me, to accept people for who they are and most important, he showed me what unconditional love is like.”
Zach leaned over her bed and placed his hand on the side of her face. “Unconditional love?”
She wet her lips. “Yes. That’s what I feel for you, Zach. I love you with my whole being.”
His lips were on hers in an instant, the kiss gentle, sweet and loving. Her heart tripped as she used her hand to cup the back of his neck. Opening her lips, she invited him in.
The hospital room door opened and they broke apart.
Grandma Beatrice strode to the bed, a big smile on her face. “About time you two got it on.” She studied Zach’s face and nodded. “You need to get to work now, young man. She needs sex and she needs it now. That is, if you want her to walk out of this sterile place.” Grandma glared at the room. “Humph, I hate hospitals.”
Bea cringed at Zach’s confused expression. She better tell him now or someone else would. And Grandma was right, she needed him soon.
Grandma Beatrice peered at Zach. “Come down here, boy, and give me a kiss goodbye.”
Zach obliged and kissed her on the cheek. Then she stepped up to Bea. “Have courage, young lady. Everything in life worth having is worth suffering for. You’ve suffered and found someone worth it all. Take care, sweetie.”
With a quick kiss to Bea’s cheek, Grandma Beatrice turned to leave.
Bea stopped her. “Wait, Grandma. How did you slip past Kayla? I thought she guarded my door like a pit bull?”
Grandma rolled her eyes. “It wasn’t that hard, hon. Everyone else is gone and she’s hanging all over your doctor, so my guess is that you two will be alone for a while.” Grandma wiggled her eyebrows before disappearing around the door.
Zach chuckled. “I like your grandmother. A one-track mind, but I still like her.”
Bea took a steadying breath. “Is that the last person?”
Zach grinned. “I don’t know. I lost count.”
She smacked his forearm.
He grabbed her hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss her palm, his eyes never leaving her face.
A shiver raced across her skin. “Zach, we need to talk.”
He brought her hand down and sighed. “I know. I need to apologize for the way I treated you last week.”
Bea gazed into his eyes and wondered what planet he came from. Of course he was upset. Maybe they could have worked it out if she had tried to reach him again in a few days. But no, she had to punish herself until she was too sick for sex. Even now, the idea of having sex with another man made her want to vomit. “I know the letters and photos were a shock to you, but they were to me too. I don’t know what your letter said, but the photos were enough for me to know you wouldn’t understand. I want you to know every one of those pictures was taken before we met.”
Zach squeezed her hand. “I should have known. I questioned your letters from the start, that someone didn’t want us together. I should have realized. Still, it was hard to see you with another man, men.”
Bea looked away. “I’m sorry you had to see that. I know you’ve been wit
h other women, but I would hate to see proof, especially like that.”
He turned her face toward him. “Maybe you can make it up to me by getting in the same position from that photo. Then we could erase your memory of that particular episode.”
His kind features warmed her soul. She wanted nothing more than to leave everything as it was. But she couldn’t. He had to know if they had any chance of a relationship, which she still wasn’t sure was physically possible. She played with the blanket in her hand.
He stopped her hands with his own. “Bea, what’s wrong?”
She sighed. “I have to tell you about how I’m able to live with the poison in my body.”
He shook his head. “Oh, that can wait. After all, like your grandmother said, we have some time alone right now.” He raised his brows at her in imitation of her grandmother.
She tried to smile, but failed.
His face turned serious, but worse, his body tensed as if expecting a rejection. “Why not?”
She pulled her hands from his and laid one on his arm to soothe him and keep him there. “What my grandmother said was correct. If I don’t have sex soon, I won’t be able to leave this hospital.”
Zach’s brow furrowed. “I don’t understand, I mean I’m more than willing, but why do you have to?”
She took a deep breath. “Because intercourse is how I’m able to expel my toxins and keep them at levels low enough for my body to tolerate. I have to orgasm with a cock inside me to release the bad stuff.”
Zach pondered that. “So the men from your past, you were using to survive?”
“Yes.”
“Why? Why not simply keep one man and have him at your beck and call?”
Bea touched his cheek. “Because when my poison leaves my body, it soaks into yours. Remember getting sick that morning after we made love all night?”
“How can I forget, but that was only once. We made love many times and I didn’t get sick.”
“Because the other times, I was careful. I made sure I didn’t come with you inside me more than once. Don’t forget you were sick the night after we ate dinner at Mom’s because you had been inside me when I orgasmed, not because of the marijuana like we thought. But the night at your house, I talked myself into believing you might be immune. I let you take control and it was amazing, but then you suffered for my selfishness. I have no control with you, Zach.”
Zach made to stand, but she hung on. He stared at her hand on his arm. “So you poisoned other men until you met me.”
“Yes.” She desperately looked for a clue to his feelings. His face remained unreadable.
He looked her in the eyes. “Do you know how many times you need to do this to stay healthy?”
“I do. At least three times a week. Less than three orgasms a week and the poison builds too high. That’s why my mom sent for Phillip. When you wouldn’t see me, I couldn’t stand the thought of another man touching me. My body became toxic to itself. Phillip supposedly found an antidote, but I guess that didn’t work.”
Zach pulled out of her grip and she swallowed a whimper at the loss. She couldn’t lose him. He had her heart.
He stood and began to pace. “So that’s why you have six possible fathers.”
Bea’s answer was soft. “Yes.”
“Your mom handles the problem by sleeping with the same group of men so no one man gets too sick.”
She nodded.
He kept pacing. “Does coming in other ways, like we did, help?”
Bea shook her head. “A little, but not much.”
Zach stopped and put his hands in his pockets and stared at Bea. “In other words, for us to have a relationship, the only way to keep you alive would be for me to get sick.”
Bea nodded again.
“Holy hell.” He’d finally saved a woman he loved, a woman who had put her own life at risk to remain faithful to him, but for it to work, they would have to trade off being sick. He looked at the ceiling. “You have a sick sense of humor.”
Bea sat forward. “What?”
He looked back at her. “Not you, fate.”
She raised her eyebrow, but he didn’t elaborate.
He leaned against the wall opposite the bed. “There has to be a way we can make this work.”
Bea’s face brightened. But when a tear rolled down her cheek, he crossed to her bed and pulled her into his embrace. “Beautiful, what’s wrong?”
She spoke to his chest. “Nothing. I’m just so happy. I thought you wouldn’t want me anymore and I’d have to live that other existence. Honestly,” she pulled back to look at him, “now that I love you, I don’t think I could do it.”
His heart twisted at the depth of her feelings. She would rather die, literally, than face life without him. Humbled, unable to speak, he brought her back into his embrace, catching her lips to show her how he felt.
Her body, so soft against his, made him want to strip and crawl into the bed with her. Why not? They had privacy. One orgasm wouldn’t make him that sick, and she needed him if they hoped to check her out of the hospital and back to his place.
His mind made up, Zach pulled away, grinning at her groan. He pulled the t-shirt Josh had given him over his head and threw it on the other bed in the room. Then he unzipped his jeans.
Bea’s voice halted him. “Zach, what are you doing?”
“What do you think I’m doing? I’m making love to you.”
“But—”
“No buts about it. I’m making love to you. I’m going to slide this cock,” he pulled his cock from his jeans to show her, “into your wet, swollen folds and find nirvana as you convulse around me. And there’s nothing you can do about it.”
Bea’s bright eyes revealed her desire and his cock hardened. Not needing any more encouragement than that, he bent to untie his boots.
“But, Zach.”
He stood back up and slid his boots off, shaking his head at her. “I told you, no buts.”
She pointed behind him and raised her brow. “I just thought you might want to close the curtain over the window to the hallway.”
He turned, thankful he hadn’t dropped his jeans yet, though his cock, hard and upright, hung out. Stepping to the curtain, he closed it and turned, a mock frown on his face. “Are you happy now?”
Bea giggled. “No. Not until you stop teasing me and bring that gorgeous piece of man-meat over here. My pussy is already wet and oh so empty. Want to see?” She spread her legs beneath the sheet.
In a second his pants were off and the sheet tossed as he climbed into the bed. “Let’s see exactly how wet you are.” With those words, he positioned himself between her legs and pushed into her in one long stroke. Her slick moistness enveloping his cock made him feel as if he’d come home.
Her squeal of delight hardened him further. He held her still, her head between his hands as he waited for her to open her eyes.
When he didn’t move, she looked at him.
“I love you, Bea. We will figure this out.”
Her mouth opened and he stopped any words with a deep kiss. He didn’t want to think. He wanted to feel, and this lady could make that happen. There would be time for thinking later, though his gut told him it might not do them any good. With determination, he pumped into the woman he loved, showing her with his body how much she meant to him.
Chapter Fourteen
Bea paced before the great windows in Zach’s living room. If she bothered to stop and look, she could enjoy the budding of the maple trees, but she couldn’t stand still. The weather continued to grow warmer and Zach worked on the finishing touches of the carving. The completed birch tree appeared alive, but the two “critters” as Zach called them, had yet to be finished.
She went back into his kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Kayla said Josh had called and asked her to arrive around three. Should she take the cheese out yet? They could be late. Deciding to leave it, she popped a chunk into her mouth and closed the fridge. Maybe she should let Zach kn
ow the time. He needed to shower before coming upstairs.
Ugh. She walked back into the living room. Ever since yesterday when they received the call, she’d been a bundle of energy. What could Dr. Josh have found? Four days had gone by since she’d come back to Zach’s to recover. Though still weak, she had already gained a little weight back, but her toxins were building. And Zach couldn’t afford to get sick with the carving due. The radio said Ice-Out could be any day with the plane flying over the lake every two hours now.
The door closed downstairs, startling her. “Zach?”
“Yeah, it’s me. I’ll be right up.”
His baritone voice alone softened the edges of her over-sensitized nerves. She strode back into the kitchen and pulled out the cheese. Grabbing the cracker tray, she brought them both into the living room. She walked back to the kitchen to open a bottle of wine. As she tried to dig the bottle opener into the cork, she noticed her hands were shaking.
Zach’s arms came around her.
She calmed and dropped the corkscrew. Somehow his presence made everything feel possible. She sighed. “Can you help me with this?”
He turned her around.
He was stark naked. “Zach, they’ll be here any—”
He pressed her into the counter as his tongue sought entry between her lips and his hard cock begged for entry to her pussy. The hot sensation of pure desire made her knees weak. She wrapped her arms around his neck, crushing her hardening nipples against his wet chest.
He broke their kiss. “Did that help?”
She pulled out of his arms, smiling. “Yes, it did. But you better get some clothes on. Kayla won’t mind, but I doubt Dr. Josh will be happy.”
“He’s just Josh to me.”
“I know, but it’s fun to tease him. Now go.”
He turned to leave but she squeezed his ass cheek. “Think they’ll mind waiting?”
He spun around so fast, he caught her off guard. Picking her up, he set her on the counter island, away from the wine. “Who says they’ll have to wait?” Throwing up her long denim skirt, he pulled her thong off and held it up. “Did you ever think of going without these? I’d prefer it.”