The injustice sent heat rising to Allie’s face.
Met Gabe? MET Gabe? I tried to kill Gabe …
‘After all that happened last term, how could you?’ Jules continued, clearly furious. ‘How could you invite Nathaniel’s people here?’
Allie tried not rise to the bait. There were things she needed to know and getting angry wouldn’t help.
‘I know you’re angry, Jules, but, first, has Sylvain been expelled?’ she asked crisply.
‘Not yet,’ Jules said gracelessly.
Allie ignored the last comment. ‘Is he OK? Have you seen him?’
‘He’s a mess, but he’s alive,’ Jules said. ‘No thanks to you and your brother.’
Closing her eyes, Allie allowed herself a moment of relief. Then she squared her shoulders and faced the prefect.
‘I’m sorry you got in trouble because of me. I would never put Cimmeria in danger knowingly. I didn’t invite Christopher – he just came. And, yes, I wanted to see my brother. I had to know …’ Her breath caught and she paused. ‘I just had to.’
Jules did not seem placated. ‘Sometimes it seems like all you do is put Cimmeria in danger, Allie. Everything was fine until you came here. And, maybe it’s unfair of me to say this, but sometimes I really wish …’ Allie flinched, and Jules stopped, biting her lip. ‘I’m sorry. I shouldn’t …’
‘No. Don’t apologise.’ Allie said, straightening her spine. ‘I deserve that. You know, I am trying …’ But her voice trailed off. What was the point? Nothing she said would make things different. ‘I’m just … sorry.’
As she said the last words she was already walking away; her ribs felt tight around her lungs, and she had the awful sense that everything had gone horribly wrong.
If Sylvain was fine and hadn’t been expelled then there was one thing Allie needed to do before finding Isabelle and facing whatever happened next. She needed to talk to Carter.
As she walked down the wide hallway through crowds of chatting students, relaxing on a Saturday morning, her steps were slow and reluctant. If Jules knew what had happened, then Carter probably did, too. He knew she’d kept Christopher’s letter a secret from him, and shared it with someone he hated. That she’d lied to him.
He’ll never forgive me, she thought. And why should he? I’m a liar. Like everyone else in my family …
So lost was Allie in self-incrimination that Jo had nearly walked past before she’d spotted her.
‘Hey, Jo, have you seen …’ Her voice trailed off as she got a good look at her friend; Jo’s face was red and raw from tears, her short blonde hair rumpled, her uniform buttoned up crooked. ‘Are you … Jo, what’s the matter?’
‘Is it true?’ Jo stared at her with red eyes. ‘What everybody’s saying. Is it true?’
‘I don’t …’ Allie’s mouth went dry and the pounding in her head grew louder and more insistent. ‘What is everyone saying?’
‘Did you see Gabe last night? Here?’ Jo’s voice rose, and Allie could see people stopping to look at them.
Taking Jo’s hand, she tried to pull her out of the hallway towards the kitchen but Jo recoiled, yanking her hand free and slapping hard at Allie’s wrist. The slap stung and Allie pulled her hand back before she could hit it again.
‘Jo, calm down.’ She looked at her friend with concern, and chose her words carefully. ‘Yes, I saw Gabe last night. He was sneaking around the grounds.’
‘What …’ Jo stared at her as if she were trying to focus. ‘What was he doing here? Why did you see him?’
Allie didn’t know how much of what happened last night was freely known and she lowered her voice. ‘Christopher came to see me.’ The memory of Gabe carrying her brutally through the woods made her stomach churn. ‘Gabe was with him.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ Jo’s accusing tone was unexpected, and Allie stared at her blankly.
‘Tell you what?’
‘You went to see Gabe and you didn’t tell me.’
‘Jesus, Jo.’ Allie fought to keep her temper. Jo clearly wasn’t herself and getting angry wouldn’t help. She didn’t know what had happened, and anything involving Gabe made her irrational. ‘I went to see Christopher and only Christopher. I just wanted some answers. I didn’t know Gabe would be there. He showed up without an invitation. And we shouldn’t be talking about this.’
For a long moment Jo’s eyes searched hers. ‘You wouldn’t talk to Gabe without telling me, would you?’
‘No, Jo,’ Allie said sadly. ‘I wouldn’t do that. But you need to stop thinking about Gabe. He’s not good for you. He’s not good for anyone.’
‘I know that,’ Jo snapped. ‘“But … Don’t you see? I never got to ask him why he did what he did.’
Allie thought about her own driving need to ask Christopher why he left her family and for the first time she thought she understood Jo’s irrational attachment to Gabe.
‘I promise you,’ she reached for Jo’s hand and this time she didn’t hit her, ‘if Gabe ever gets in touch with me, I’ll tell you.’
A short time later, her hand shook as she raised it to knock lightly against Isabelle’s door. The pounding in her head had worsened now, and was more like a jazz drummer beating away at the inside of her skull. But she had to keep going.
‘Come in.’
When she stepped into the room, the headmistress didn’t look thrilled to see her. Her glasses were shoved up on to her head, and she had a stack of papers in one hand.
‘I told you I’d call you when I was ready for you.’
‘I’m sorry, Isabelle.’ Allie leaned her head against the door frame as if resting it would make it stop hurting. ‘Sorry – I seem to be saying that a lot today. I just feel like I should be doing something. I feel like everything’s my fault and I want to, I don’t know, make it better.’
Isabelle pointed at a chair. ‘Sit.’ As Allie sat down, the headmistress studied her appraisingly. ‘Have you eaten today?’
Allie shook her head.
The headmistress’ eyes narrowed. ‘Yesterday?’
Too numb and tired to lie, Allie held up her empty hands.
‘I thought as much,’ Isabelle said. ‘You look awful. Stay here.’
Turning the kettle on as she passed, she walked out of the door.
Sitting still in the empty office, Allie stared into the distance as the kettle rumbled to life. As steam poured out in a curling cloud, she flipped through her mental list of options, her lips moving slightly, betraying the intensity of her concentration.
A rush of air stirred her hair as the door opened. Isabelle handed her a plate holding a cheese sandwich before turning to fill the two teacups. Allie nibbled at the edge – even though she was hungry, she didn’t feel like eating.
Isabelle handed her a cup of tea and then curled up in the deep chair next to hers.
For a while they sat in silence that could have been misconstrued as companionable. But Allie could sense the tension between them.
‘I’m afraid,’ the headmistress said, ‘that August Zelazny has demanded a tribunal be held to hear the case for expelling you. This will happen tomorrow.’
The news didn’t surprise Allie but it hurt nonetheless. It was entirely possible that, after everything she’d been through, Cimmeria would just throw her out like all the other schools.
‘OK.’ Her voice was dull. ‘I guess I deserve that.’
‘I’d like to say you don’t, but yes, you do.’ Isabelle’s voice was peevish, but when Allie sat staring glumly at her hands, she added, ‘Eat your sandwich.’
Allie took a dutiful bite, avoiding the headmistress’ eyes.
‘There’s something else,’ Isabelle said with a sigh. ‘And you’re not going to like it either.’
Allie swallowed hard. ‘What is it?’
The headmistress rubbed her eyes. ‘We need you to talk to Christopher again. When he next gets in touch with you, you’ll make a date and set a meeting point.’
‘And th
en you’ll … what? Grab him?’ Allie set her plate down with a clatter. ‘He has people on the inside, Isabelle. He knows everything about me. My grades. Who I’m dating …’ She slid down further in her chair. ‘If he knows that kind of stuff, he’ll know all about your plan. And he’ll use that against us.’
‘We will have two plans.’ Isabelle said the words so quietly Allie almost missed them. ‘One that we tell the staff and senior Night School students. And one that I tell you, Sylvain and a handful of people I trust.’
Allie covered her mouth with the fingers of one hand. ‘Do you know who it is, Isabelle? Who’s working for Nathaniel?’
Isabelle shook her head. The conversation seemed to be ageing her – she looked drawn. ‘I wish I did.’
‘It’s somebody high up, isn’t it?’ Allie said. ‘Somebody close to you.’
‘And to you,’ Isabelle said.
They stared at each other for a long second, the enormity of the situation reflecting back to Allie from Isabelle’s worried eyes. In the corner the kettle ticked as it cooled.
And that’s when Allie decided she didn’t care what Christopher said. She trusted Isabelle. She would side with Isabelle and fight with Isabelle against whatever it was he believed.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Christopher.’
The headmistress regarded her coolly.
‘I couldn’t, Isabelle.’ Allie knew she sounded desperate, but she needed her to understand. ‘I knew what you would do. I knew you’d set him up and grab him, and he’d know I turned him in. I couldn’t do that without talking to him first. I needed to hear what he had to say.’
‘And now?’ Isabelle’s voice was heavy.
‘Now …’ Allie clutched her cup again so tightly she was surprised it didn’t burst. ‘Now I know my brother is gone. I don’t recognise the person who’s replaced him. He’s changed. And I don’t want anything to do with him.’
Isabelle leaned towards her. ‘I care about you, Allie. But you must have faith in me. I know a lot about how Nathaniel works.’ She was close enough for Allie to see the green flecks in her light brown eyes. ‘And I am afraid if you don’t learn to trust me, one day you’re going to get hurt.’
After her meeting with Isabelle, and unable to find Carter anywhere, Allie fled to her room. Exhausted, she fell asleep, and didn’t wake up until it was nearly dinner time.
Just before seven, she was walking down the stairs towards the dining hall when she saw Sylvain walking a short distance ahead. For a split second, her heart leapt and she hurried her pace. Then she saw that he wasn’t alone – Nicole held his arm. Her long dark hair swung with each step and from time to time she glanced over at him, worry clouding her big dark eyes. As Allie watched, Sylvain fell slightly behind her. When Nicole turned to see why he’d slowed, her gaze met Allie’s. Leaning towards Sylvain, she whispered something – he turned to look at her and Allie felt a charge of electricity.
He was the only one who knew what had happened last night. The only one who understood.
She didn’t want to feel like this, but she did.
He said something back to Nicole and they stood still, waiting for her.
Faking a casual smile, Allie waved as if she’d been hoping to see them together and hurried down to them.
‘I’ve been looking for you everywhere, Sylvain. Oh, hey, Nicole.’ She was pleased her voice sounded normal. ‘Are you feeling better?’
But even as she cheerfully uttered the words, her eyes skittered from wound to wound, silently assessing him. He was covered in cuts and bruises. One eye was still thoroughly swollen, but his jaw looked better – no longer puffy.
‘I’m alive,’ he said. ‘But this is not the best I’ve ever looked.’
Nicole slid her hand down his arm to his hand. ‘I told him it looked like he crashed his motorcycle without a helmet, but he says only that there was a fight and that you helped him.’
Allie tried to imagine him, not in his uniform, but in jeans and a T-shirt, riding an expensive motorcycle. It wasn’t that hard to do.
Sylvain was still watching her. ‘Sit with us at dinner,’ he said.
Allie hesitated. If he was dating Nicole again she didn’t want to be a gooseberry. But Nicole interceded. ‘Yes,’ she said, leading the way. ‘Please do.’
As they walked towards the dining hall, Allie waited until Nicole wasn’t looking then leaned close to Sylvain.
‘Have you talked with Jerry and Zelazny yet?’
Nodding, he looked away.
She frowned at his reaction. ‘Is everything OK?’
When he didn’t reply, something in the way he avoided her eyes told her it wasn’t.
Before she could say anything else, Nicole glanced back at them, her gaze sharp and curious.
Quickly, Allie stepped away.
Carter didn’t come to dinner. His continuing absence left Allie with a growing sense of dread. Wherever he was, he knew what had happened. And he wasn’t taking it well. After a tense meal during which she couldn’t talk about anything that mattered, she fled the dining hall at the first opening, determined to track him down.
A quick search showed he wasn’t in the library or the common room. She was considering crashing the boys’ dorm when it struck her that she knew exactly where he was.
With a steadying breath, she opened the door to the great hall and stepped inside letting it swing shut behind her. She squinted into the dimness; dust motes seemed to hang still in the air in denial of the laws of gravity. In front of a fireplace so big she could easily have stood upright inside it, she surveyed the space – a few empty tables, a scattering of chairs.
She was turning back towards the door when a scuffing sound made her turn back around again.
‘Carter?’
No answer. But, from the far corner of the room, the sound came again. Like a chair moving on the wood floor as someone stood up.
Weaving her way between odd pieces of furniture, Allie walked towards the sounds. She was about halfway across the room when she sensed motion to her left.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ He was standing in the shadows, one hand on the back of a wooden chair.
‘Carter.’ Her throat seemed to close on her words. ‘I …’
She’d thought so hard about what she should say, but now that she was standing in front of him, she knew there could be no excuses.
‘I knew you’d go to Isabelle,’ she said at last, ‘regardless of what I wanted. And I needed to talk to Christopher. I couldn’t let them kidnap my brother.’
‘So you told Sylvain instead.’
His grip on the chair was so tight she could see his knuckles bulge.
He looked so hurt and angry; her shoulders sagged under the weight of her guilt. ‘I had to tell him, for the interview.’ When Carter shot her a dubious look her tone became more defensive. ‘He asked if I’d heard from Christopher and I had. I couldn’t lie. So I told him. I told him I was going to go and meet him. He didn’t want me to go alone.’
‘Why didn’t you tell someone else? What about Rachel?’ When he spoke, his voice was low and steady, but she could see how he fought for control over his emotions. ‘Don’t you trust her?’
‘She doesn’t have any training.’ Allie’s voice was dull. She felt like she’d lost this argument already. ‘I couldn’t bear it if she got hurt.’ She took a step towards him. ‘Carter, it killed me not to tell you. You’re the one person I would have wanted to tell. But …’
‘But you didn’t trust me.’
With a move so sudden she didn’t have any time to react, he picked up the chair with one hand and flung it across the room. It crashed to the floor with a shattering sound that echoed through the ballroom.
‘Carter,’ she breathed, staring up at him.
‘Tell me the truth, Allie.’ Clenching his hands at his sides, he breathed heavily. ‘Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel anything for Sylvain except friendship. Tell me you’re not attracted
to him at all.’
Allie opened her mouth to say, Don’t be ridiculous. You’re the only one.
But nothing came out. She’d lied enough. And her feelings for Sylvain were so conflicted she no longer knew how she felt about him.
She hadn’t thought it possible Carter’s eyes could get darker.
Crossing the space between them in three rapid steps, he grabbed her arms, pulling her close. His body pressed up against hers until she could feel his heart beating through his shirt. She could see nothing except his dark eyes.
‘I would,’ he said through clenched teeth, ‘have done anything for you.’
Allie stared at him, stunned. This was not Carter. He never acted like this. Reaching up, she touched his temple lightly with her fingertips – he flinched away.
‘I’m so sorry I hurt you,’ she whispered, her lip trembling. ‘I just … I hoped you would understand how important it was for me to see Christopher. And I care about you so much …’
He didn’t wait for her to finish. Shoving her away roughly, he stepped back.
‘And I hoped you would understand how important it is for you to trust me. But you don’t. And I’m starting to think …’ To her horror she realised there were tears in his eyes. ‘I think you never will.’
When he walked out of the room, he didn’t look back.
TWENTY-ONE
The next morning Allie felt numb.
Numb to pain, numb to danger. Numb to anything the world had left to throw at her.
When Isabelle called her to her office to tell her a tribunal was scheduled for that evening to consider her punishment, she just nodded.
Of course that was next.
‘Tell them the truth,’ Isabelle said, ‘the way you explained it to me.’
‘Will they kick me out?’ Allie asked. She only half cared what the answer would be, but Isabelle’s simple reply stung.
‘I don’t know.’
After that, Allie retreated to the forced quiet of the library where, in a dim corner, she tried to bury herself in work. There was nobody for her to turn to. She couldn’t even really tell Rachel why she and Carter had had the fight – not without getting into more trouble, anyway.
Night School: Legacy Page 20