Carpe Demon: Adventures of a Demon-Hunting Soccer Mom

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Carpe Demon: Adventures of a Demon-Hunting Soccer Mom Page 22

by Julie Kenner


  “They’re everywhere,” he said, but his voice lacked the conviction it had earlier with me.

  “Well, then, I’d better refill your holy water,” she said. “We wouldn’t want any getting in here when you aren’t looking.”

  As I watched, she grabbed his little bottle, winked at me, then headed into the bathroom. I heard the water running, then she returned and tucked the bottle back into his pocket. “There you go. That should keep those nasty demons away.”

  “Good Melinda,” he said. “You’re the only one here who’s good to me.”

  “Do you do that for him every day?” I asked.

  “Oh, sure,” she said. “Otherwise, the demons might get him.”

  “She understands,” Eddie says. “Melinda believes me.”

  “Right now, though, it’s time for your medicine.” She turned to me. “Are you going to visit much longer? I can wait if you want. The meds make him pretty loopy.”

  “That’s okay,” I said. “We were just leaving.” Not entirely true, but I did need to get moving.

  She shook a handful of multicolored pills out of a tiny paper cup, then handed them to Eddie, who took them without question. He popped the pills dry with one hand, holding out his other arm for the injection that Melinda was administering. As soon as she withdrew the needle, his head lolled back. Almost instantly I could see the tension drain from his body.

  “Eddie?”

  He looked up at me, but the Eddie Lohmann I’d met in the television room was gone.

  “I-don’t-know-you,” he said, his words slurring together in one big jumble of sound. “Do-I-know-you?”

  “We just met,” I said gently. “But we’ll come back later.” It didn’t matter what I said. He was already drifting off to sleep.

  Laura and I followed Melinda out of the room. “What’s with the medicine cabinet?” I asked.

  Melinda’s cheeks flamed. “Oh, golly,” she said. “You heard him. It’s demon this and vampire that all the time if we don’t load him up with drugs. He went too long today, actually, because he spit out his pills. That’s why Dr. Parker ordered the injection.” She leaned closer. “It’s kinda creepy. I think he really believes all of that.”

  “No way,” I said, trying hard to keep my face straight.

  “No, truly,” she said. “I don’t think he’s like dangerous or anything, but—” She cut herself off, her forehead crinkling.

  “But what?”

  “Actually, maybe he is. Once he totally jumped another resident. And the poor guy had just had a massive coronary the night before. It was a scene. There’s Eddie leaping on Sam, and he was going at him with this tongue depressor and trying to shove it into his eye. Took two orderlies and Mrs. Tabor to get him off.”

  “Wow,” I said. “You saw all that?”

  “Yeah. Gave me the willies.”

  “How’s Sam?” Laura asked.

  “Great,” she said. “Can you believe? Two days after a heart attack and he discharged himself. Said he was going to get an apartment in Sun City.”

  I fought a grimace. Unless I missed my guess, Sam was the codger who’d flown through my window and was now cooling his heels in the county dump. “Sam discharged himself?” I asked. “He could do that?”

  “Oh, sure,” she said. “The residents here are all voluntary. It’s not like they’re committed or anything. Most just don’t have anyplace else to go or their families can’t take care of them. Special needs and all. I mean, like Eddie. What if you took him home and he decided you were a demon or something?” She cocked her head as she looked at me. “You said you’re family, right?”

  “Absolutely,” I said.

  “Hard to see a family member spiral down like that,” she said. “I really sympathize.” She shook her head. “Demons,” she said with a snort. “As if.”

  I dropped Laura back at her house before heading on to the cathedral. We didn’t talk. I think both of us were thinking about Eddie, stuck in that nursing home, keeping a watchful eye out for demons in his Rice Krispies.

  The thing was, I believed him. (Well, not about the cereal.) Especially after the Sam story, I’d be stupid not to. But what could I do? If any of the old people I’d seen had been inhabited by Goramesh’s minions, then we probably didn’t have much to worry about in the fate-of-the-world department—none of them had seemed particularly interested in a Hunter’s presence on the premises. If anything, they’d seemed more interested in five-card draw and Jerry Springer. Not my choice of programming, but hardly demonic.

  I was still buried deep in my Eddie thoughts as I pulled open the heavy wooden doors leading into the cathedral. I’d expected silence, but a creaking sound echoed through the room, and as I listened, I recognized it as the sound of a door swinging on rusty hinges. I couldn’t see anyone, but I assumed Father Ben was coming out of the sacristy, and I increased my pace to catch up to him. I wanted to get his thoughts on narrowing my search of the records. (Anything to shorten my time in the basement archives!) But as my silent companion stepped out from behind the partition, I stopped cold. Not Father Ben—Stuart.

  I froze, guilt swelling. He had to be here looking for me. And when he found me without Timmy . . . well, I was going to have to come clean or come up with a fancy fabrication.

  Not inclined to do either, I dropped to one knee, my head down as I genuflected. Then I moved into a pew, toed down the kneeler and put my head in my hands, the very image of a pious woman deep in prayer. With any luck, he wouldn’t notice me.

  His footsteps increased, his tempo hurried, and he headed down the steps off the sanctuary and then down the aisle. After a moment I heard the heavy clunk of the door falling shut behind him.

  I stayed in that position. At first my mind was blank, but then I think I sank into prayer, thanking God for not letting Stuart notice me, for keeping my secret safe until I was ready to share it with my family, for keeping me alive despite my—

  A hand closed on my shoulder and I screamed, my voice filling the cathedral with as much power as the Sunday morning cantor’s did.

  “Oh, Kate, I’m so sorry!”

  I relaxed, my hand reflexively patting my chest. Father Ben. “Father. Sorry. You scared me.”

  “Please, I should be apologizing. But I wanted to let you know that we’ll be closing the cathedral early today and tomorrow, so that the workers can sand the floors. I thought you might want to know so that your time in the archives isn’t cut short.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “I do appreciate that.” I stood, and he followed suit. “I saw that Stuart was down there,” I said, hoping my voice sounded casual. “Was he looking for me?”

  “I don’t think so. My understanding is he’s working on some project of his own.”

  “Oh.” Not the answer I’d expected. And I couldn’t imagine what interest my less-than-devout husband could possibly have in musty old church records. “Do you know what?”

  “I’m afraid I don’t. He made arrangements with the bishop.”

  I blinked, getting more and more curious, but I just waved the comment away. “No big deal,” I said. “I’ll ask him tonight.”

  We were at the door to the sacristy now, and I tugged it open.

  “Since the construction will cut your time short today and tomorrow, would you like for me to arrange access for you Friday evening after the fair?”

  “The fair?” I repeated, suddenly feeling like we weren’t talking the same language.

  “Didn’t I see that you were signed up to help with the parish fair on Friday?”

  “Oh, right. Of course.” Oops. I’d completely forgotten. “Yes, if you could keep the archives open late, I’d very much appreciate it.” I smiled, hoping I looked charming and helpful as I made a mental note to myself: figure out what I signed up to do at the fair.

  I kept Father Ben detained for a few more minutes as I drilled him about the donations’ organization. The answer, unfortunately, was that there really was no organization. What I sa
w was what I got. Which meant I was back to where I’d started. This time, at least, I could try to find some regional connection.

  I settled myself at the table, opened the first box (gingerly, in case of more bugs), and dug back into my project. An hour later all I had to show for my efforts was a backache. Okay, that wasn’t entirely true. I did learn some things. I found out, for example, that Cecil Curtis was Clark Curtis’s father, which meant I was reading documents about Stuart’s boss’s family. (Which did make the job slightly more interesting. Basic human nosiness, I guess.) As I’d discovered yesterday, he’d left all of his land (and we’re talking a lot of land) and worldly possessions to the Church, specifically excluding his “spouse or issue,” a little fact that I imagine pissed off Clark (not to mention his mom and siblings).

  I learned that Thomas Petrie had won a church-sponsored scholarship and had gone to St. Thomas Aquinas College. He ended up being famous for his series of books that revolved around a mystery-solving priest, and after he started to hit the New York Times list regularly, he made frequent contributions to the Church. Since the donations weren’t monetary (one year he gave a wooden Madonna-and-child statute), I assume he was donating things that he’d acquired researching each of his various books.

  I skimmed through the other benefactors, too, but didn’t find much of interest. Mike Florence caught my eye simply because of the Italian town, but from what I could tell, he’d donated nothing more interesting than a six-inch-square gold box with a beautiful carved crucifix affixed to the lid. The receipt accompanied the donation, though, and unless Goramesh was on the hunt for a box sold at Macy’s in the 1950s, then I doubted I was on the right track. (I’ll admit I was a little curious to see the thing, but it was in a container at the bottom of the stack and all the way at the back. That’s what we in the archive-reviewing biz call “geographically undesirable.”)

  With a sigh of resignation, I pushed aside the last itemized list. My options now were to review every single piece of paper in each donor’s file, or start in on the cool stuff in the boxes. Since I doubted I’d recognize what I was looking for if I saw it, the smart thing would be to review letters and correspondence. But I only had a half-hour left in the basement, my eyes hurt, and I was bored.

  Besides, something in my gut told me we were running out of time, and at the moment all I could do was put my faith in God (and Larson and Laura). I was in a cathedral after all. If divine inspiration was going to hit, surely I was in the right place.

  I pulled over the first box, but didn’t haul it up to the table. It weighed a ton. Instead, I kept it by my feet, then toed off the lid, keeping a safe distance in case a flock of beasties came zipping out.

  None did, and I peered down, dismayed to see that the box was filled with decaying leather-bound Bibles. Thousands of pages, any of which could have a note inscribed on them. And each Bible began with page after page of family histories scrawled in terrible handwriting that I was going to have to decipher.

  Oh, joy.

  I pulled the first Bible, fighting a sneeze as I reminded myself why I’d never started a family Bible for my own family—they get old and rotten and decrepit, and then what do you do? If you’re the Oliveras family, apparently you donate it to the Church so a slob like me can wade through the pages later. And why not? It’s not like you can dump it in the trash can. There’s no Thou Shalt Not, but it still seems to me that tossing a Bible would score you some serious demerits on your permanent Record.

  I managed to decipher the handwriting on the family-tree portions (nothing interesting), then paged slowly through the book (no handwritten phrases or underlined verses). I paid particular attention to John 11:17, the chapter and verse about Lazarus, but there didn’t appear to be any notes in the margin, any tipped-in sheets of paper, any messages scrawled with invisible ink. I even inspected every centimeter of the leather binding, searching for treasure maps hidden in the spine. Nothing. As far as I could tell, this was a family Bible and nothing more.

  When I put the Bible aside, it was almost four o’clock. The cathedral was closing, and I needed to get Timmy. Of course, as soon as I stepped into the real world, all my real-world problems lined up behind me. While I’d been in the basement, Eddie and Stuart had been forgotten. Now, though, they were front and center again.

  Stuart, I assumed, had a reason for going to the cathedral, and had I not done my impression of the world’s most pious Catholic, perhaps he would have noticed me and explained. Since it was stupid to speculate, I forced myself off the subject. Surely he’d tell me tonight. And if he didn’t . . . well, then I’d just have to ask.

  Eddie was a harder subject. And as I turned into the parking lot at Timmy’s school, I still didn’t know what to do about him. More, I didn’t know why I’d suddenly become obsessed with the idea of doing anything at all.

  At the moment, though, Eddie was the least of my problems. Just beyond those doors was a two-year-old who (I hoped) hadn’t been scarred for life by his first experience in non-parental child care.

  I parked the car and got out, realizing only then how much my stomach was churning. I’d kept my cell phone on all day with no frantic calls from Nadine or Miss Sally. So I knew (hoped) that no horrible accident had befallen my child.

  But it wasn’t horrible accidents I was worried about. I was terrified of the expression I’d see in his eyes when I picked him up. An expression that said “Where have you been, Mommy, and why did you leave me with strangers?” As a Demon Hunter, I had a great answer to that. As a mom, I couldn’t think of a thing to say.

  “He did great,” Nadine said as I passed the reception desk on my way to the Explorers classroom. I almost stopped and cross-examined her (What is “great”? Are you just saying that to make me feel better? Will my son ever forgive me for dumping him off on you people?), but I fought the urge and soldiered on.

  One nice thing KidSpace does is put windows in the doors to all the classrooms. From a mommy perspective, this is a good thing, and I took the opportunity to peer in at my little munchkin. There he was, my little man, playing on the floor with a plastic dump truck, right alongside another little boy, this one pushing a dinosaur in a wheelbarrow.

  He was smiling. He was happy. And from my perspective, this was a minor miracle. I’d made a good decision. My sweet little boy wasn’t traumatized. He didn’t need therapy. He wouldn’t run to Oprah in twenty years and rat me out. If anything, he seemed to be having a great time.

  Life was good.

  I opened the door, held out my arms to him . . . then watched with desperation as Timmy burst into tears.

  “Mommamommamomma!” The truck was forgotten as he raced to me. I caught him on the fly and scooped him up, hugging him and patting his back. So much for my rampant lauding of my parental decisions; this was one stressed-out little boy.

  “He really did fine today,” Miss Sally said as I rubbed circles between his shoulders and murmured nice-sounding words. “This is very normal.”

  I believed her (well, I sort of believed her), but that didn’t lessen the guilt. I shifted Timmy so that I could see his face. “Hey, little man. You ready to go home?”

  He nodded, thumb now permanently entrenched in his mouth.

  “Did you have fun today?”

  Another reluctant nod, but at least it eased my guilt.

  “Before you go, though, I need you to sign this form.” Miss Sally pushed a clipboard toward me. I shifted Timmy’s weight on my hip and squinted at the preprinted page. “Accident Report.”

  “What happened? Is he hurt?” I looked down at Timmy. “Are you hurt?”

  “No, Mommy,” he said. “No biting Cody. No. Biting.”

  My cheeks warmed. “He bit someone?”

  “Just a little bite,” Miss Sally assured me. “The tooth impression has already faded, and he and Cody have been playing together all afternoon.”

  “He bit hard enough to leave a mark?” I could hear my voice rise, but I was having trouble
getting my head around this. My son was a biter? My little boy was a problem child? “But Nadine said he did great.”

  “Oh, he did. Truly. This isn’t that unusual for new students. And it won’t be a problem unless it happens again. Or unless Cody’s parents complain.” She held up a hand. “But they won’t. Cody was a biter, too.”

  There it was. That label. Biter. I had a biter.

  After a few more minutes of guilt on my part and reassurance on Sally’s part, I started to believe that the day really hadn’t been a total disaster. In addition to taking a taste of his schoolmate, Timmy had made friends, sang songs, and spent a full hour playing with finger paints. What more could a toddler want?

  In the end we trotted down the hall hand-in-hand, and as we reached the door, he lifted his little face, and those big brown eyes sucked me in. “I love you, Mommy,” he said, and I melted on the spot. He might be a biter, but he was my baby. “Home, Mommy? We go home?”

  “Soon, sport,” I said. “We have one more quick errand.” I hadn’t even realized I’d made up my mind until I said those words, but something about seeing Timmy in the care of others had fueled my decision. I couldn’t leave Eddie all alone. In his condition he might accidentally blow the lid off Forza, and that was something I simply couldn’t let happen.

  Plus, I feared that Eddie was right—there were demons walking the halls of Coastal Mists. And any one of those dark creatures would be more than interested to know all the delicious little Forza facts that were locked in Eddie’s head. Facts that might get Eddie—or me or my family— killed. Besides, Hunters protected other Hunters. I’d always lived by that code, and even now, retired, I couldn’t back away from it.

  So Timmy and I were going back to get the man. What I’d do with him once I had him . . . well, that was anybody’s guess.

  Fifteen

  “He’s who ?” Stuart’s voice, though whispered, seemed to fill the kitchen. I made a frantic pressing motion, as if I were snuffing flames, hoping Eddie hadn’t heard.

 

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