by L. A. Kelly
“You had guards,” he said. “They just weren’t expecting anything.”
With her hand in his, he walked to the pond and then around it toward the east wall.
“Karll would be pleased with what you’ve become,” she told him suddenly.
“I can’t grasp how you could say that, Netta.”
“He loved God. He hated the thought of anyone suffering wrongly. If he had known of you and what you were trapped in, he would have longed to help.”
“A terrible loss I gave you and your people.” He looked up at the gathering clouds.
“I’m not trying to make you sad, Tahn. I just want you to see that I have peace with it now. I will always love him, but I know I have the blessing of God to have you here.” She stopped and took his other hand. “God wanted you in the Trilett house. He wanted you to have my father’s authority behind you. And you are a warrior for a reason. In God’s hands now, you will be a blessing in justice for people in need. You already have been.” She kissed his cheek softly and then released his hands. “I had to tell you that. Do you want to continue our walk?”
“I think so.”
She smiled, and they walked together along the eastern edge of the quiet pond.
31
In Onath, Samis and Lucas acted the part of common travelers and stopped at the shop where Mattius had stayed to watch the church. He was gone, and it seemed he had been for days. They asked an old man sitting outside where they might find the saver of Triletts to bear him a gift. The old man gave them the directions without a worry. They probably seemed harmless enough, just an elderly gent and his rather distracted son.
Samis was in a good temper as they left the houses behind them. He began to sing, a melody familiar to all his men from the times he’d been drunk or celebrating some special victory. Lucas rode in silence behind him, thinking he’d lost his mind. There was no way a man of any sense would ride up to the Trilett estate like that. But then he realized Samis didn’t care if he had the element of surprise. Maybe he didn’t even want it. He wanted Tahn’s attention. He seemed to think the rest would take care of itself.
By the willow tree again, Netta was talking about the church and Father Anolle’s hope that Tahn and all the children would choose to worship with them.
But Tahn was suddenly quiet, and he turned his head toward the wall at the north, listening.
“Tahn? What is it?”
He held up his hand. She watched him in tense silence, wondering what he might have heard.
“Go inside,” he whispered.
“What’s wrong?”
“Please, Netta, go to your father.”
But she lingered, seeing something frightening in his eyes.
“Samis is here,” he told her. “I know I heard him. And I don’t want you out here.” He turned toward the gate.
“Where are you going?”
“He’s come for me. And I might as well go and greet him.”
“No, Tahn!” she cried. “There are guards if he tries to enter! Let them take care of this!”
“I can’t, Lady. It’s my responsibility.”
She was suddenly afraid of what he meant by that. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Yes. I do.” He reached and touched her cheek. “I don’t expect you to understand. But please, Netta. Go. Trust God for me.”
He was walking away from her, despite her protest, toward the gate and what would have to be a wrenching meeting for him. Something about his look terrified her. She knew he was prepared to fight. But the tyrant mercenary would mean it to the death. Surely he knew that!
“No, Tahn!” she called after him.
He turned and looked at her with compassion. “Don’t, Lady,” he said. “Your father says he still has a hold. I have to face him.”
Dear God! her heart cried. If I cannot prevent it, surely you can!
But Tahn was already out of her sight. She turned to the house as he had said, but she could not bear to obey him. She dropped to her knees on the spot.
Father Almighty, protect his life again. Strengthen him to do what he must, but give him the courage to let it rest in your hands, not his own.
At the gate, a guard stood to his post, looking out over the wall anxiously.
“Samis is here,” Tahn told him in a quiet voice. “Go quickly and alert the others. I will see him first. But no matter what happens, he must not be allowed to escape.”
As the first guard departed in obedience, two others approached. “Be prepared,” he told them. “We can’t be sure he’s alone.”
He stood at the gate for a moment and looked out, marveling at how dark the night now seemed when only moments before with the lady it had been so much lighter. Every sound had stopped. But Samis would still be there, waiting. And Tahn refused to hide. He pulled open the gate and stood clutching an iron rail.
“Samis!”
Netta jerked her head upward at Tahn’s voice, her heart pounding thunderously within her. He thinks he is prepared to kill Samis tonight, she realized. By his own hand, or that of our guards. But I know it is not really what he wants, not even for this villain. More blood now, even such guilty blood, will plague him. There is surely another way, dear God, to be free of the man!
Tahn waited in silence, knowing one shout would be enough. He’d be there in the darkness, there was no question in his mind.
“Well,” the voice finally came. “You make yourself a handy target, standing there in the gate alone.”
“You’ve no archers today, or I’d have known already.”
“You’re not thinking,” Samis scolded. “I could have thrown my knife.”
“It’s not your way. Not until you’ve railed at me first.”
There were men now behind Tahn, and men coming on the wall. Soon there would be men outside the gate, circling behind Samis, searching for others, and closing him in.
But the old man seemed to understand that. “Tell your guards to relax,” he said. “I’ve come to bring you something. You can receive a guest without supervision, can’t you?”
“They will do nothing beyond my say,” Tahn told him.
“How coldhearted you can be. I’ve earned no audience with you? Even though I saved your life and gave you sixteen years of my own to make you what you are?” Somewhere in the darkness he laughed. “Ah, Tahn. You will always hate me. To the day you die.”
“You came for a reason,” Tahn replied. “You might as well show yourself and let us be done with it.”
Again he laughed. “Indeed! We have been bitter long enough. It is time this foolish feud was ended, as it should be, just you and me. I am brave enough. Are you?”
Samis stepped from the shadows toward Tahn. He had a slight limp and was looking strangely gray. “I am alone,” he said. “And I brought you an old friend.” He tossed Tahn’s sheathed sword carefully so that it landed a few feet in front of him. “Now you are ready to fight me honorably, if you have it in you.”
“You’re not well,” Tahn told him. “I would kill you easily.”
“Perhaps not. You’re not that good, and you’re still weak. I can tell it in your stance. But if you did manage it, isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?”
Tahn’s stomach was a knot. He had always wanted it. He had waited for the day. But that was before. Now, he remembered his prayer that God help him not to shed blood again.
But the guards were ready. He could accomplish the deed with his hand or with his word, and it would be almost the same. And this was not just anyone. This was Samis. They would never be completely safe as long as he was alive.
“You try my patience, boy!” Samis yelled. “Pick up your sword like a man. This has been a long time coming. We have both known it!”
Tahn looked down at the weapon at his feet.
“You never wanted anything more than this,” Samis taunted. “You remember, don’t you, three years ago? You told me then how you longed to face me down. After you killed that wretched worm
in this very house! Now there you stand as if you owned the place. Haughty devil! You think tying your tail to Netta Trilett has gained you something? But you know she has caused you nothing but pain. What a fool you are to think they would accept you. You’re just a useful slave to them until they tire of you and throw you out. You’re nothing! I put up with you longer than anyone else ever could. Fight me, Tahn! We both know it is what you want!”
Netta’s heart pounded. She was close enough to the wall to hear the awful words. But she ran to the gate, needing to see Tahn, praying that he could bear this as God would see it best.
With a steel he hadn’t expected, Tahn leaned slowly down and lifted the sword. He could see Samis step closer with a gleam of expectation. Surely he knew what he was up against with the guards standing by. He must have come knowing it would be the end, wanting it to be.
Tahn looked up at his teacher with turmoil in his heart. It would be easy to finish and easy to justify. But that prayer, his own prayer, would not let go of him.
“Draw the blade, Tahn,” Samis told him coolly. “You will appreciate the feel of it in your hand again. It is part of you, isn’t it?”
Tahn shook his head. “You gave me this sword when I was ten,” he said. “You can have it back.” He hurled the weapon through the air, and it landed in the dust at Samis’s side.
“You wish to carry your hate for me burning in you to your grave, Tahn? I have offered you the opportunity to purge it and avenge yourself of me! Would you walk away from the one thing you’ve wanted most in your life?”
Tahn took a deep breath. “What I wanted most was the peace God has given. I wanted to be loved, and I found that with him too. You need God now. You have nothing else.”
“They’ve filled you with a lot of drivel, haven’t they? You will see one day how much God and the Triletts really care for you. You remember the pain the lady caused you, don’t you? You were days at it, weeks, weren’t you, Tahn? You remember!”
Tahn stood still, watching him. It hurt to let him go on and not silence this monster with his own hand. Indeed he did remember. Everything. And it made him shudder.
“There will only be more of it, Tahn,” Samis continued. “Your friends will betray you as you have betrayed me. And you will deserve the knife in your back!”
“I’ve heard enough,” Tahn told him. “Leave us.”
Samis laughed. “You’re afraid of me still! You are a coward not to fight me. And so dishonest. You know you want it.”
“No,” he said slowly. “I want to forgive you and go on with the life God has given.”
“You talk like an old woman! Fight me, boy, or I shall kill you, I swear it!”
Tahn shook his head. “God take pity on you,” he said. “Just let him leave,” he told the soldiers and turned back to the gate.
But Samis was not to be denied so easily. He pulled the knife from his belt and flung it at Tahn with all the strength he could muster. It struck him at his left shoulder.
Tahn clutched the rail and cried out with the sudden pain. He could hear the soldiers rushing at Samis.
“Stop!” he told his men. “Let him go!”
He turned and saw Lucas for the first time, standing beneath a tree, watching. Suddenly Lucas was raising his arm and bowing his head in salute.
“Come and take him,” Tahn told him. “And be gone from here.”
The soldiers stood in disbelief. Why would he let them go?
Lucas rushed forward and lifted Samis from the ground where the soldiers had knocked him down. It was clear then that Samis was weaker than he acted. He looked truly old. He was muttering as Lucas led him away toward their horses.
Netta ran to Tahn and lended her arm for support.
“I told you to go,” he said, suddenly exhausted.
The guard named Josef was at Tahn’s other side, and Netta looked up at him. “Help me get him to the house.”
But another soldier approached who thought the lady’s presence might be the reason for Tahn’s behavior. “Shall we follow and overtake them?” he asked.
“No. I said let them go. It’s over.” He took a deep breath, realizing suddenly that he’d reached a hand to Samis when he told him he needed God. Let him hear it, he prayed, before it’s too late. God would be willing to reach out his own hand, even to Samis. He did save my life once, Tahn thought. There must be something in there somewhere to redeem.
“Just keep watch,” Tahn told the soldiers. “In case he returns.”
Josef pulled Samis’s knife free and threw it on the ground. Netta held the wound with her fine lace kerchief. “Tahn,” she said softly. “Let us take you to the house.”
Lucas led his master through the trees, but he stopped and offered him water when Samis suddenly started sweating.
He was panting for breath. But the soldiers hadn’t hurt him, Lucas knew that. This must be something else.
“He’s no different than I am,” Samis was mumbling. “He’s a killer at heart. It’s his hate of me, that’s what it is! He won’t accept any plan of mine. But he’d fight me when my back’s turned.
If he knew I didn’t want it. Curse him! I’ll find a way.”
“No!” Lucas told him. “Don’t you know when it’s enough? We are lucky to be leaving alive. He should have told his men to kill you on the spot.”
Samis stared at him and clenched his fists. Lucas was right, of course. Tahn could easily have had him killed. Why had he not?
Surely it was what Lucas had said at Valhal, that Tahn would either kill him or walk away in pity. Pity! The thought enraged him. “Curse you, Tahn Dorn! May your friends destroy you!”
Lucas just stared at him.
“Get out of my way, you fool!” Samis yelled. “You’re just like him! You’re enjoying this. That’s why you’ve stayed with me. You want to watch me waste away. I curse you! I won’t have your pity. Leave me, or I will kill you in Tahn’s stead!”
In a fury, he shuffled away from Lucas as quickly as he could move. There was such a pounding in his chest, such a terrible headache again. The night was whirling around him, and he hated life and the thought of death. There must be victory to be found in this somewhere. There must be!
He had known where the horses were, but now he couldn’t see them. He pressed on past them through the trees, cursing under his breath.
“Samis!” Lucas called, intending to direct him.
“Leave me alone!”
His breathing came hard now. The weakness and dizziness rushed over him mercilessly, but he wouldn’t give in to them, nor to Lucas’s call. He walked on with faltering steps. He didn’t see the old tree he’d come to until he fell against it, suddenly too weak to stand. He grasped at the trunk for a moment, pain tearing at his skull. Then his right arm gave way, and he sunk slowly to the ground, now drenched in sweat.
“Sir?”
It was Lucas, following as usual. He stood there, just watching. What he must be thinking! There the old man goes. Another spell. Let him die in such misery.
He wanted to yell at him again, but he could not find his voice. Even his body betrayed him. Even his face felt like it was tearing away and leaving him. He could not make his mouth form the words he wanted to use.
“Samis, sir, what has happened? Can you get up?”
He tried. Oh, how he wanted to prove he could do anything he set his mind to. With his left arm he could grasp at the air, but his right arm hung limply and would not respond. He could shift his left leg wearily, but he could not make the right one move at all. He knew he could not get up this time. He stared up at Lucas, suddenly aware of his own trembling.
“Sir? Speak to me!” The younger man actually looked afraid.
Fool! Samis’s mind cried. You’re a fool, Lucas! He struggled again to speak, but he could not make it work. The effort left him gasping for breath.
Lucas straightened Samis’s limbs on the grass and covered him with his coat. “Lay calmly, now,” he said with fear in his voice.
“I’ll get help. Tahn showed you one mercy tonight. Surely they will tell me where to find a healer. I’ll be right back. Stay calm.”
Lucas left him at a dead run, and soon in the distance Samis could hear his shouts. A good thinker, Lucas. If he runs up unannounced, he could get himself killed. To think he would go back to Tahn at the Trilett house. For another mercy! To beg me a healer!
It was too much. He could imagine them laughing together and then watching him linger for days in an agonizing death. A finish in fighting would have been honorable. That was why they would so carefully deny it him. But they will not have their laugh! he raged. I will not amuse them so! With his left hand he fumbled about in his clothes until finally he found the handle of a concealed blade.
I will not live needy in their care. I will not die helpless under their gaze. I have yet some strength. Let me die strong!
Netta was glad that Benn had met them as they came to the house. They had their entry well lit with oil lamps, and Jarel was outside now, speaking to Josef. Thankfully, Vari and Hildy were with the children. Let them not know it was Samis here, Netta thought, till he is long gone.
She held a cloth to Tahn’s bloody shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re all right?”
“It will heal, Netta. I think it did not go too deep.”
“Do you expect him back?” Benn asked.
“I don’t know. He’s weakened.”
“If he returns,” Benn said, “I will have to apprehend him.”
“I would expect that.” Tahn looked up at the Trilett patriarch. “Thank you for not rebuking me.”
Netta touched his head. “I believe God honors what you did. But what did he mean, that I’d caused you pain?”
Tahn looked out the open door. “There’s no truth to it.”
“But he meant something. I saw it affect you.”
“He punished me, Lady. That’s what he meant. For my failure to kill you with Karll.”
Benn laid a hand on his daughter’s shoulder.