by Nana Malone
Gage hoped it would all be enough, but he thought he might be too aware that he'd scored seven points in the first half, and only needed nine more to hit a hundred. He wasn't about to argue with the coach and draw further attention to himself, so he went out onto the court and took his position, searching the stands for Becker and her phone in the moments before the ref blew the whistle for play to resume. He didn't see her in the area where she'd been during the first half; in fact, he didn't see her at all.
It distracted him at first, and he nearly missed an easy block, but returning his focus to his opponent, he managed to get a few fingers on the ball as the other guy attempted a pass. It was enough to send the ball off-course and to one of Gage's teammates, who took it downcourt and scored. Concern about where Becker could have gone worked wonders, as far as taking Gage's mind off of how many points he'd scored in the game. Every time there was a stoppage of time or he got to rest on the bench for a few minutes, even during foul shots when everyone was waiting for the shot to get set up, his eyes drifted to Becker's usual area of the bleachers. But other spectators had filled in the spot where she was supposed to be.
She could be grabbing something to eat, or she could have run to the bathroom, and there was always the possibility that someone else had taken her seat while she was gone. She might very well be sitting in a different section now.
He lost track of how many points he scored, splitting his attention between what might have happened to Becker and doing his job on the court, which meant not hogging the ball or trying to force a shot when someone else had a better angle. As his team's score climbed back to even with their opponents' the crowd grew more rambunctious. The two teams traded the lead back and forth with dizzying rapidity, until Gage was fouled with seconds left on the clock, and his team down by one point, putting the team's fate into his hands.
But he didn't feel the pressure the way he normally would; those two shots and a few more seconds on the clock were all that stood between him and being able to find out what had happened to Becker. He bounced the ball three times before lining up and shooting; it went in. Amid the din of celebration for his having tied the game, Gage listened for Becker's familiar cadence, but was unable to pick it out. He bounced the ball again three times, lined up, and took his shot.
The audience and his teammates erupted in celebration, but there were still those few seconds left on the clock, and one of their opponents had the ball, hurling it downcourt in a desperate attempt to get it in the net. It hit the backboard, but glanced off without touching the rim.
The buzzer was drowned out by the sounds of everyone in the gymnasium screaming, and Gage idly wondered how bruised he would be with so many of his teammates jabbing him in triumph and congratulation. If it had been a more prominent game, the stands might have emptied onto the court to join the players in celebration, but as it was, they emptied pretty quick, the spectators choosing to celebrate outdoors rather than inside.
He eventually found Becker, but not where he'd expected. She'd been given a better seat near the press corps. She jumped up and down, holding his phone up. She'd brought his parents closer, so they could see better. Damn, he loved her.
What the hell? His chest squeezed. He was in a whole mess of trouble.
“One-oh-three, man,” one of the captains said loudly, with a hearty slap on Gage's back. “One-oh-three. And you pulled our asses out of the fire with those last two shots, man. Talk about clutch.”
He'd done it. They'd won. No matter how touch-and-go that game had been. And now, all he wanted to do was hold Becker. Oh, who was he kidding? He wanted to do a whole hell of a lot more than hold her.
Twenty-Three
Becker jumped up and down with excitement. They'd won. Gage and his team had won. She'd gone into this game knowing exactly how many points Gage needed to hit his hundred. He’d done it tonight. It was the moment they'd been looking forward to for weeks.
The problem was, she was in no kind of mood. The nightmare from last night still lingered with her. That and her conversation with Avery. Now she was worried Gage would be able to tell something was off.
She could tell he was looking for her out there. It turned out that his father had called in a favor to get her seated on the floor. Those must have been some strings to pull, as the Billings stadium was completely full that night. When Gage saw her, the smile he gave her was wide and so happy. Her heart pinched. He needs to know the truth. No. That would ruin everything.
As they left the stadium, one of his teammates called out, “You coming to the party?”
Gage shook his head. “Nope. Gonna hang with Becker.”
The guy grinned knowingly, and she flushed. She hated that. Hated that people had access to her love life in that way. When they reached her dorm, she knew what was coming. But she no idea how to stop that train.
She let them in, dropping her bag on the desk, and turned. “You want some—”
Gage's arms were around her quickly, his lips searingly soft, coaxing hers. “Do you have any idea how much I worried when I didn't see you in the stands?”
“I'm sorry, one of the security team came and moved me to the floor.”
His touch was so gentle, so soft, as he bent and nuzzled her throat. She thought he'd be demanding, urgent. But he was considerate, and sweet. He was her Gage always.
She wanted this. She wanted to be with him. She wanted him to make love to her. She wanted him to erase the memory of that night. But she was scared and too wrung out. “Gage…” she whispered.
He lifted her easily and sat her on her desk. “You seem nervous, Becks. You don't have to be. We don't need to do anything. I just want to be with you, if that's okay. Do you have any idea how much I've been looking forward to spending some alone time with you?”
Becker forced a smile. “I—I know. I've been looking forward to this, too.”
Gage licked his bottom lip, before grazing it with his teeth. “I wanted to take you somewhere. You know, somewhere special, romantic. I thought maybe it was too much pressure. And, with the home game, the scouts in the audience, and a lot on my mind, I didn't get a chance to book anything. We should wait.” His lips kissed along the column of her throat.
No. She wasn't waiting. She shook her head. “No. Just kiss me again. Keep kissing me.”
He frowned a little, as his gaze met hers. “You okay?”
She nodded, vigorously pulling him to her. When he tried to be sweet on the next kiss, she deliberately changed the dynamic. She drove her tongue between his lips, forcing him to up their pace.
With a groan, he easily complied. They were all tongues, and teeth, and licking and sucking. She tugged his shirt off, and clutched his shoulders. She wanted this. She wanted Gage. She needed him. To erase the memory of Daniel's face. To erase the pain. To erase everything. Even as he tried to pull back, she complained. Her nails dug into shoulders. Begging—no, urging, him to go on.
The ragged breaths tore through him he lifted his lips from hers. He kissed her again, but sweeter, and she wasn't having it. She tried to push to that desperate, needy place again, and Gage pulled back. “Something's off. What's wrong?”
“Nothing's wrong.”
He shook his head. “No, I know you. Something's up. Just talk to me. We can figure it out.”
Becker looked up at him, and his handsome face. His hair sticking straight up on end. Had she done that? She shook her head, knowing that her mind was trying to distract her from what she needed to do. But could she tell him? Would he believe her? Finally, it didn't matter, because the dam broke, regardless. She couldn't hold anything back, anymore. “D—Daniel hurt me.”
Gage pulled back, very slowly. “What do you mean, he hurt you?”
Before she knew what she was doing, she was spilling out the whole story. “Three years ago, at my junior prom. Dad insisted that Daniel was the only one who could take me, because he could trust him.” The tears started to flow.
“We were at Avery's house for the after-par
ty, and I had a couple of drinks. I really didn't feel well. I found out later that he'd given me ecstasy. And it messed with me. I was so sick. And then he—” She hiccupped, but she forced herself to keep going.
Gage stood very still.
“He was trying to have sex with me. Told me that of course I wanted it, but I—wasn't ready. You know. He…he wanted to look for lube, or something. But he used his fingers—” Then, the sobbing began in earnest. She broke down, letting it all out.
Gage's voice was deadly-soft when he spoke again. “Has he tried to touch you since?”
“Every time we're somewhere alone, together. Every party of my father's. I've gotten good at showing up, then vanishing. But somehow, he always finds me. I saw him the other night. He didn't do anything to me, but he was waiting for me. When I got home from Avery's.”
Gage still hadn't touched her. His voice was low and tight. “I'm going to kill him.”
She snapped her head up. “No. Don't. I don't want you to do anything. I just want to forget. I want to make it go away. And then, he threatened to tell everyone that I was your tutor.”
“You think I give a shit about something like that, in light of what you just told me? I'm going to deal with it.”
She blinked rapidly. “How? I only told you because I started having flashback memories again. I hadn't had them at all this year, since we've been together. Avery knew what happened. She's been checking in with me. It was just nice to feel normal again. I didn't tell you all of this so you could kill him. You have your career to think about, and school. You can't do anything.”
Gage paced back and forth across her small room, running his hands through his hair. “That's where you're wrong. I'm going to rip his throat out. I wish you had fucking told me before.”
“Would you have done this then?”
“Yes.” He shook his head. “No. I don't know. Maybe I could have taken it slower, or something.”
“So you can make decisions for me. About what I'm feeling, and what I need?”
“Yes, when you clearly need it. Something has to be done. Does your father know?”
Becker rocked back and forth as she remembered what her father said. “Dad told me I should stop making up stories for attention. That Daniel was a good kid. I think that was the day I started hating him.”
Gage let out a string of inventive curses. “Becker, you need to go to the police. Or something.”
She wiped away the tears from her cheeks. “It wouldn’t do anything. If my own father won’t believe me, who else would?”
“I believe you. Becker, he…hurt you.”
Becker understood what he couldn't say. “He didn't get any farther. Avery stopped him.”
“That doesn't change what he was going to do. You have to take this to the police.”
“I don't want to. I just want to forget. I just want to be with you and forget, and get on with my life.”
He still didn't touch her. He didn't hold her. Didn’t do what she needed. He just paced, with his hands shoved in his pockets. And tried to tell her what she needed to be doing. That pissed her off more than anything else.
“Look, we'll go to the police and tell them what happened.”
“And be told that it's my word against his? Thanks. I know how this works. You don't.”
He threw up his hands. “Becker, you need to do something. Or at least fucking let me do something.”
Pissed off, she tilted her chin up. “This isn't about you. I told you because— Hell, I don't know why I told you. Clearly, I should never have done that.”
“What you mean, you should never have done that?”
“Look at you. You're furious. You're not listening to me. You wanted to charge around making decisions about me for me. I think I was better off when you didn't know.”
He stopped and stared at her. “I guess I should probably go, then.”
“Yeah, you better. Clearly, this isn't happening tonight.”
“Becker—”
She hopped to her feet, marched to the door, and held it open. “See you around, Gage.”
“So that’s it? You're not going to talk to me?”
“We're done talking, Gage.” She held onto her tears until he stormed out past her.
Gage stormed out of her dorm. How the hell had that gone so wrong? He'd been on such a fucking high after hitting all those points today. When he looked over to see her grinning at him, he knew. He knew how much he cared about her. He knew that he'd fallen in love with her.
Why couldn't she see how much he cared? Why wouldn't she let him help? Fuck this. He was headed to the party. Who are you kidding? You'd rather lock yourself in your room and drink. Yeah, that seemed like a much better plan.
As he stormed back across campus towards his room, his phone rang. “What?”
Bryce chuckled. “Hey, little brother, If you're otherwise occupied, here's a hint—don't answer the phone.”
Gage breathed out a sigh. “You didn't interrupt anything.”
Bryce laughed. “Am I missing something? Because Echo called, screaming that you'd won. So the way I figured it, you should be in a great mood.”
“I was.”
Bryce was silent for a moment. “Girl trouble, huh?”
“How did you know?”
“It's the only thing that can put that kind of damper on a mood that should be really happy.”
Gage slowed his pace. “I don't know. I don't know what happened. Everything was going great. We were—getting close. And I could tell something was wrong. So I pushed her to tell me. And what she told me…fuck, Bryce, it was bad.”
His brother's voice went low and icy. “How bad?”
Gage was sure he'd never heard his brother sound lethal before. That simply wasn't in Bryce’s nature. But right now, he sounded just as pissed off as Gage was. “Bad. Something that happened to her. Something one of my teammates did to her.”
“You need help killing them?”
“See? That's the appropriate response. I told her I was going to kill him. And I am. First, I want to talk to coaching and have his ass booted from the team.”
Bryce was silent for a moment. “Is that what she wants you to do?”
“No. She's being stubborn. She said she wants to forget the whole thing. Never think about it again. How could she do that? The way I feel right now? It's only a fraction of how she's been feeling for the last couple of years, I'm sure. How could she not do anything?” As he vented, his brother listened quietly. When he was done, he exhaled slowly.
Bryce's voice was softer. “So, let me guess, you decided you knew what was best for her, and have already decided the outcome she should want, and the steps you should take.”
Of course he had. “Yeah, because that was the sensible thing to do.”
His brother sighed. “Did you ask her what she wanted? Or did you just decide what she was supposed to do?”
“Of course, I decided for her. She was going to make the wrong choice.” His brother was silent for a moment. Gears turned in Gage's brain, information slowly sinking in. When understanding pealed, Gage cursed. “Shit. I'm just like that asshole. I took away her choice.”
“Bingo.”
“But how am I supposed to have that information, and not want to do something about it?”
“That's the shitty part. But if you love the girl, you’ll figure it out.”
Love. His chest tightened. He did fucking love her. Dammit. How the hell did this happen? Bryce was right. He'd screwed up. The real question now, was how to fix it?
There was a knock at her door, but Becker wasn't getting up to answer. She was too busy crying, holding her pillow and wishing it was Gage, and crying. He'd left. You wanted him to. Well yes. Sort of. No, she hadn't. She’d wanted him to stay. She’d wanted him to listen to what she wanted. She knew he was right. She had to do something about Daniel. Ignoring him had proven to be the wrong course of action. Avery had told her it wouldn't work, way back then. And then
she thought she could tell her father. And her father would swoop in and do what daddies do. But he hadn't.
Whoever it was knocked again.
“Go away. I'm tired.”
“Becker, it's Gage. Please, let me in.”
“I think we said everything we had to say to each other. I don't want to talk to you right now.”
There was silence for a moment. And then she heard his voice, low and subdued. “I'm sorry. I fucked up. I wanted to charge in and white knight you. And instead, what I did was tell you what to do. Which is not how I should have handled that. What I should've done first was tell you that none of that, none of what happened, none of what he did, was your fault. Second thing I should've done was hold you. And tell you how I feel about you.”
Becker's heart was breaking. She pushed herself to sitting and used the back of her hand wipe her tears away. When she padded over to the door and opened it, Gage’s large frame hung in the doorway. His arms were braced on the top left of the doorjamb. His eyes were anguished.
“I'm so sorry.”
She opened her mouth to reply, but the tears started all over again, and Becker fell into his arms. He wrapped himself tight around her, and he held her tight.
“It's okay,” he murmured. “I'm not going to do anything that you don't want. I'm sorry. What do you need?”
She trembled in his arms, then tilted her head to look at him. “All I need is—”
But he didn't let her finish. Instead, he bent down and fused his lips to hers. Gone were the gentle, coaxing kisses. This one carried an edge of unrestrained passion. Just like the first time they'd kissed. As if their lips together sparked an inferno that licked at her skin.
Gage's tongue slid over hers, coaxing hers into a response, and her blood heated. She couldn't think. Couldn't move. Couldn't breathe. All she wanted to do was melt in his arms. Stepping backward, she pulled him into her room and kicked the door shut behind him.
He growled low in his throat, and she could feel the vibrations against her chest. His hands gripped her waist tighter, but they didn't slide up or down. And she needed them to move, needed his touch. With a gasp, she dragged her lips from his. “Gage.”