by Nicole Fox
I studied my hometown carefully as we headed toward the city limits. It was possible I would never see it again, and I had to be okay with that. There would be some things I would miss, like having everyone know my name when I walked in a store or the way the town suddenly came to life when it was time for the Peach Festival. There were good things about Myrtle Creek, but I was leaving one very bad thing behind. I held Snake a little tighter. He reached down to where my hand rested on his abdomen and rubbed the back of it reassuringly as we went past the last gas station on the edge of town and headed east.
Chapter 15
Snake
I wanted to throw back my head and laugh. It had been so much easier than I had imagined it would be, and now I finally had Bambi where she belonged. Though it had really only been a few weeks since she had gotten into the back of that squad car, it felt like forever since she’d been with me. We had been happy up until that moment, and then everything had changed. That seemed to be the theme that revolved around us, but I knew even that itself was going to change.
The little town went by in a blur, and I relished the sign that indicated we were leaving the city limits. I was going to get her as far away from this place as I could. She deserved something new, something different, something better. Maybe we both did. I kept on driving, unwilling to stop. As long as we rode, my fantasy could continue.
Bambi seemed content to let the illusion stay intact, as well. She didn’t ask me where I’d been or why I had come for her. She didn’t wonder how I had found out where she lived (although that was an easy thing to do in a place like Myrtle Creek, where everybody knew everyone else). Even when we stopped for gas, we only spoke enough to get the job done and then we hit the road again. We were back together, and that was all we needed for the moment.
It was dark when we crossed the state line into Alabama, and I couldn’t remember the last time I had ridden so long. Bruiser had often been content to go only a few hours at a time, with only a longer stretch here or there when one of the guys had gotten in trouble and we needed to cross a state border. I was getting tired, and I had been watching the signs on the side of the road for a while. This wasn’t an occasion for just any old motel with a tired check-in clerk and mashed shag carpeting. Bambi deserved more than just a sleazy room with a bed that no longer vibrated and years of dust clinging to the sagging ceiling fan. I swung into the nicest place I saw and stopped.
She blinked in the bright light of the sign. “What are we doing here?”
I grinned. “Starting our new life together.”
We checked in, and for the first time went up an elevator and down a long carpeted hallway to our room. We made an odd couple, with me in my leathers and her in that sexy pantsuit, but I didn’t care what anybody might think of us. I slid the key card in the lock and opened the door for her.
The room was probably the nicest one I’d been in during the last five years. I couldn’t say it was a luxury hotel, but it was a far cry from the dumps we had made love in before. The carpet was deep and fluffy, and it matched the long curtains that draped down on either side of the window. A flat-screen television hung on the wall over a massive wardrobe. To the right was the door to the bathroom, which I noticed contained a jacuzzi tub. Next to that was the kitchenette, complete with a coffee pot and a mini fridge. Most importantly, a king-sized bed presided over the room. The pillows were fluffy and white against the turned-down comforter.
But as much as I wanted to, I didn’t scoop her up and set her on it. Instead, I guided her to the sofa that faced the couch. “I think we ought to talk.”
For the first time since our reunion, I saw uncertainty flash through her eyes. But she sat down and nodded, eager to hear what I had to say.
“I’m sure you already know this, but I’ve been nothing but a complete idiot.”
“Don’t say that …”
“No, Bambi. I have. And you’ve got to let me just get all this out, because I don’t want to wait any longer. I don’t want there to be any secrets between us. Even if something is hard or uncomfortable, I want us to be able to deal with it together. I’ve spent most of my life thinking about just myself because nobody else was going to do it for me, but I know now that isn’t true.”
I paced back and forth in front of the couch. I should have been tired and sore from so much riding, but there was too much going on in my brain, and it took precedence over my body. Even while moving, I couldn’t take my eyes off her. She had the flush of new life under her skin, and it suited her well.
“Here’s what really happened: The Warriors and I rode into Myrtle Creek, and I didn’t think it was going to be any different than any other place we landed in. We went to the bar, we got drunk, and we weren’t thinking about the future. Life in a motorcycle club isn’t a sure one, where you know where you’re going or what you’re doing. It’s all spur of the moment.
“Anyway, when you get a bunch of horny idiots together, sometimes stupid things happen. Rusty started this bet that we all put in a thousand dollars, and whoever knocked up a local girl first got the money. Looking back, I can see what an awful thing that was to even suggest, much less agree on. But I saw your poster from the Peach Festival, and I just couldn’t resist. You were hot, and I wanted you. Most of the guys just went after random chicks they thought might be easy, but I told them I would find a way to have the Peach Festival Queen.”
“How sweet.” Bambi smiled at me demurely from the couch. She still looked like that sweet Texas beauty queen with her nice clothes and her conservative makeup on, but I knew there was a whole other side to her. The poster I had seen that night had come to life, and it had been so much more than I had bargained for. It wasn’t the kind of thing I would ever give up, though. Not again. I had let her slip through my fingers too many times already, and I had to make sure I kept her. Telling her the truth—the entire truth—was the first step.
“No, it wasn’t sweet,” I countered. “It wasn’t sweet at all. I was just a horny biker after an innocent, beautiful woman. My intentions were far less than honorable, and you need to know that. I wasn’t the same person then that I am now, even though it’s only been a couple of months. I wanted the money from the bet, and I wanted to get you in bed. Even if I didn’t win the cash, there was no way I could really lose if I got to sleep with you.”
I ran my hand through my hair, whipping off the bandana and flinging it to the soft carpeting of the hotel room. “I saw you through that window, watching me. Even without talking to you, it was like I could tell you were ready for someone like me to come along. Still, I didn’t think it would be so easy to get you on the back of my bike.”
“You drew me like a moth to a flame,” she admitted, her lips curling upward once again. “I can’t quite explain it, either, but it was like I just had to see what you were all about. For a little while, I regretted jumping on the back of your bike like that. It seemed like such a foolish thing to do. But now, I can’t imagine myself doing anything different.”
“I can’t, either,” I agreed. “And it’s been strange since I met you. It’s like everything in my entire life has changed, and I can’t believe I was ever anybody other than who I am when I’m with you. And I feel horribly about the fact that, initially, you were nothing but a bet. It wasn’t anything romantic or nice. I don’t even like to admit it, but if we’re really going to do this, then I want you to understand the truth. More importantly, I need to know if you accept it. If not, well, then I understand that as well.” I sucked in a deep breath and stared at her, waiting for her to rage and yell at me for using her. I had been a dick, and that wasn’t restricted to just the bet. She had every right to reject me before we took this any further.
Bambi stared at her hands where they sat clutched together on her lap. She rubbed her lips together while she thought, having no idea how sexy it made her. “When I walked into that pool hall and I heard you talking to the guys about whether or not I was pregnant and if you had won the money, I
was horrified.” Her voice was quiet, almost hoarse.
My heart dropped into my boots. I couldn’t believe I had done that to her. What the hell was wrong with me?
“I had thought that what we had was something big and romantic, and that we were just constantly riding off into the sunset together. That was how it had felt up until that moment, and I loved it. I didn’t care that we were never in one place for very long or that we stayed in old motels. It made it feel more like an adventure, and I think I needed that.” She brought those big brown eyes up to look at me, and I damn near fell right into them. “I’d lived such a miserable life, Snake. I didn’t really know who I was, and I hated what I was forced to pretend to be. Nothing was right in my world, and I needed something completely different to free me from that.
“I have to admit that I started to question myself when you wouldn’t let me go back to explain things to Mother.” Her eyes dropped to the floor again. “I felt bad for her. She’s always been alone. Her parents weren’t very loving or kind, and they died shortly after I was born. She didn’t have a lot of friends, and she didn’t do well with men. As soon as she got pregnant with me, my father left. I know she’s completely crazy—there’s no doubt of that—but I couldn’t help but feel some sort of sympathy for her when I knew she was all alone in that house.”
“Bambi, I’m so sorry. I should have let you go back.” I reached a hand toward her, realizing what an asshole I must have seemed when she had asked me about going home. I never should have denied her anything, especially something so important.
“No, you shouldn’t have.” She held up her hand, palm out, to stop me. “You want to explain things to me, and I should have a chance to do the same. Snake, you might have done something really wrong by taking part in that bet, but it doesn’t mean I don’t have some things to tell you as well. And I can’t say that I’ve been perfect. There’s a lot I’m still trying to figure out.
“Anyway,” she continued, “You claimed to have won that bet, and that was when I realized it was all over for me. The dream was over, and I had to return to reality. But I did mean what I said when the cops showed up. You never kidnapped me, and I came with you of my own free will. It was also of my own free will that I left and went back home.
“Of course, it was miserable there. Mother was pissed at me for running away, and she was horrified when she found out about the baby. She didn’t say much about it once she was done yelling, but then she told me what she really wanted.” Bambi paused, swallowing several times.
I wanted to swoop down to the couch and hold her in my arms, but I could tell that wouldn’t have helped. She was upset, but she needed to get this out. And she was a much stronger woman than I had originally imagined.
“Mother asked me to claim you had raped me,” she whispered, her eyes falling to the floor.
“What?” My voice boomed through the room, and I was sure any guests in the surrounding rooms could have heard us. “I wouldn’t do a thing like that! You told her it wasn’t true, didn’t you?”
“Of course I did,” she defended. “But that’s the thing about her. She doesn’t care if it’s the truth or not as long as it serves her purpose. I was to claim that you raped me, and then tell everyone later on down the road that I had lost the baby. Mother was going to make me give it away.” She choked on the last words.
I couldn’t help myself any longer, and I was next to her on the couch in an instant. My arms were around her, caressing her, touching the delicate bump where our child was growing. I couldn’t touch enough of her at once, needing to feel that I could protect every square inch of her skin. “I never would have let that happen. I waited around far too long, hoping you would come back, but I would have fought tooth and nail for that child if it had come to it. I still will. I want all three of us to be together, no matter what happens.”
Bambi buried her head into my shoulder. She smelled of flowers and sunshine. “I know. And that’s exactly what I realized while I was back at home. For a little while, I had thought you were just like Mother, trying to keep me trapped so you could use me for your own purposes. But then I realized that you were protecting me and taking care of me in everything you did, even when you wouldn’t let me go home. You just wanted to keep me away from Mother because she would manipulate me, and you were right. That’s exactly what she was trying to do.”
I pulled her closer, running my fingers through her silky hair and pressing my rough cheek to her soft skin.
“I realized what you were really like, what you were truly about,” Bambi continued. “Even though hopping on a stranger’s bike was dangerous, I’m glad I did it. If I hadn’t, then we would never have gotten together. I can’t imagine a life like that, not now.”
I pulled away from her to hold her at arm’s length so I could see her face. “I’m glad, too. But do you forgive me? I don’t want us to go on and live our lives together if you have some deep and very deserved grudge against me. What I did was so completely wrong, and I need to know for sure if you truly let it go.”
Bambi smiled with those gorgeous pink lips. She looked into my eyes, and I could feel the connection between us more than ever. “It might not have been honorable or passionate, but if that was what it took for us to meet, then I absolutely forgive you.”
I drew her into my chest once again so she wouldn’t see the relief that I was sure was written all over my face. I needed her, and I needed her completely. If Bambi could forgive me for something like that, then I knew we would be all right.
“You want to know something else nice about this whole thing?” I asked as I looked at a framed picture on the wall on the other side of the room. A little white house took up the background, surrounded by trees and flowers. In the front yard, a mother watched her son play in the grass. The original had been made in broad brushstrokes, so it didn’t show the facial features of either of the people. Still, I could easily imagine who they might be in that idealistic little scene.
“What’s that?”
“I really did win the bet. I wanted to use the money to pursue life outside the Warriors. The club is great, but I was beginning to think there might be something more for me out there. I know now that it’s you.” I bent my head and kissed her, savoring the way she felt against my lips. “We can see what life has to offer for both of us.”
“Sounds wonderful to me.”
I gathered her in my arms and carried her to the bed.
Chapter 16
Bambi
Nine months later, I sat at the desk in the little corner room off the kitchen. I still hadn’t changed the wallpaper in here yet, and it was driving me crazy. No matter how hard I tried to concentrate, my eyes kept wandering to the hideous old flowers that crawled up the wall and twined together. I didn’t have a problem with flowers in general, and in fact had just bought a floral throw for the couch, but these particular ones were plain ugly.
Blinking, I focused on the screen once again, comparing the list of classes I needed to take for my degree to those that were available for the upcoming semester. I had been through one round of college classes so far, and I found that I loved taking them from home. It allowed me plenty of time to spend with the baby and work on the house, but I knew I was still striving toward my dream.
The bundle in my arms squirmed and fussed quietly. “Just a moment, sweetheart. I’m almost done.” Smiling, I clicked the appropriate boxes, enrolled myself in four classes, and submitted the schedule to the university. As a young mother, I had no problem getting grants and student loans, so nobody needed to worry about paying for tuition.
Ariel reminded me once again that I was taking too long. Her little hands reached out from the long sleeves of her onesie, and she pulled in her legs and pushed them out again. I closed out the browser and headed up the stairs. The master suite was on the left, but I turned to the right toward the nursery. The room was nearly as big as the master suite. Snake had insisted that we remodel this room first, and I didn’
t argue. Out came the ancient shag carpet and in went the pale wood laminate and light pink paint. With the angled roofs and dormers of our little Cape Cod style house, there was a perfect vault of ceiling over the crib. It was a gorgeous room, and I always felt so peaceful when I walked in. Even though there had been some rough nights when I had hardly slept and had rocked Ariel in the antique rocking chair for hours, it hadn’t changed my opinion.
I laid the baby gently on the changing table and pulled a clean diaper from the dispenser. She watched me with those big, blue-gray eyes that I just couldn’t stop looking at. Snake and I were both anxious to see what color they would turn out to be. She was the most gorgeous little child I’d ever seen, with sweet little ringlets of dark hair and a heart-shaped birthmark on her chest.
“Well, you were calm long enough for Mommy to get a few things done, weren’t you?” I said as I performed my duties. “I’ll be starting all new classes in a few weeks, so we’ll get to order some new books. And you’ll have to let me have a little time to read the material. Do you think you can do that?” I knew the answer already. Ariel loved to sit quietly on my lap and watch while I turned the pages of my text books. I couldn’t have asked for a calmer baby.