Crayons

by P. S. Power

  Josh got to his feet and walked with her, conscious of the fact that he still had a hard-on, but also conscious of the fact that he wasn't letting her walk to her car alone. It wasn't dangerous, but it was dark already. There were rules to things like that, right? Besides, he wanted to make sure no aliens got her.

  Jerks.

  They kissed again at the car, sweetly and then he backed up. Saying goodbye too long had never made sense to him, but then he'd never had anyone he didn't want to leave this much. She smiled and waved at him, several times, which he returned and watched until the car turned out of sight onto the street.

  The air was crisp and if there were stars above, he couldn't see them. It smelled like snow, if that made any sense. It was just something weird he did, catching that particular scent in the air. Not that there was anything in the forecasts that he'd heard. Then again, he hadn't listened to a weather forecast for months. If he wanted to know what the weather was right now he went outside and looked. Everything else was just a waste of time. Normally at least.

  He found the notebook where he'd left it and wanted to sit down and write about everything before he forgot about it. As if he could. Instead he vacuumed. He didn't know when anyone would be back after all. That reminded him to call and see who was coming back for dinner.

  Joanie brightened when she heard his voice.

  “Hey sweetie! Your mom has another big to-do tonight, we'll both be by, um, I was going to stay the night again, if...” She sounded all hesitant again.

  “Sounds good, I could use the company, what would you like for dinner?”

  “Oh, anything's fine.” She said, as if she wasn't a notoriously picky eater.

  Josh raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. They'd just decide when she got there standing in front of the cupboards.

  “I'll wait.” He made his voice dry on purpose, but for some reason Joanie totally ignored the bait for once.

  “We should be there in about... Half an hour?”

  That would be fine he decided. They didn't talk for long so once off the phone he sat down to write picking up the little, totally unused crayon.

  I am Purple.

  Chapter eight

  Mercy flew in the door and didn't even say hi, or notice the decorations on her way through to her bedroom. She ran, literally, her purse thrown to the table and nearly falling off the far side. It would have if Josh hadn't thrown himself at it, making a half wild save, part scooping it up, the rest a gentle toss to set the whole thing in place again, watching with wide eyes as she fled from the scene. Joanie at least moved at a reasonable speed, coming in nearly half a minute later, looking pretty close to half exhausted already. She dropped her far more colorful, and larger, bag on the kitchen counter, the one that made a little bar in front of the tiny cooking space.

  “Honey, I'm home...” She said, her voice a happy sing-song. She plunked down in one of the dining room chairs and gestured toward the bedrooms. “Like I said, a thing tonight, could be important.”

  He just nodded.

  “At Bill Banister's house again? The fellow from last night... Um Warren Jeffreys? More of a real meeting this time no doubt? Planning and strategy with a few key people?” It made sense, but she could be going somewhere else without them, the blond across from him nodded though, eyes going wide.

  “Someone's better informed than I thought.”

  “Amy came over, helped me do all this, which is a segue way into you realizing what the place looks like and telling me how awesome I am, though it was mainly her. She's so great.” He felt like he was going to gush about her so he just gestured toward the room, which got Joanie to actually look at it instead of him.

  “Oh my... This is incredible. How much did it cost?” The words were automatic, the response of having grown up in a family that didn't have a lot all the time. They were close emotionally, but lived far away, which was why his friend had always spent Christmas alone since they'd met.

  Only that wasn't the case was it?

  It was that he couldn't be told about her and his mom, so she couldn't just come over. That was stupid though and always had been. Joanie would have been welcome even if they were just passing her off as a friend from work. He'd have to remember to rub that one in with his mother some time. Possibly Joanie too, but only after she got past the idea that he might suddenly change his mind about her. He looked at her and laughed for a second, stopping only when she turned and stuck her tongue out at him.

  “What?” Her voice was a fake grumpy, half way between that and goofy.

  “Oh, I was just talking to Amy earlier and mentioned that other than how I felt about her I only had one big secret but that no one would believe it anyway. That's all.” He grinned, wanting to shut up, but it might be better just to put everything on the table, right?

  “And it's funny?”

  “Well, now it is, yesterday too, the day before that... a truly tragic thing, I just didn't know about.”

  “Well? Out with it, no fair leading up to something like that and then clamming up. I wanna know! Unless it's bad. Then I probably should know, but I don't want to. That's the grown up thing to do right?” She crossed her arms, but he looked away shyly then and sighed.

  “Right, well, I have a crush on you. Not like... anything big, but you know, three days ago you were my the older single woman that hung around with my mom, flirted with me and looked all cute, but maybe I could hope to score with in a weak moment and now I have to adjust. I blame the two of you for that still. What, did you really think I was going to flip out on you? I suppose I could get after mom for stealing my potential girlfriend, but...No that doesn't work. She definitely saw you first. ”

  Especially compared to what was going on with Laura Corbie and her daughters. But he was just teasing her. Not about the crush, just the rest of it. It wasn't a big deal but she went quiet for a second.

  “Seriously?”

  “Yep. Just a little thing though, I would have hopped into bed with you given half a chance though. Of course there wasn't. Which is probably good, because how awkward would it be now if we had? Eek. Well, I'll always have the time you asked me to take you...”

  She laughed.

  “There is that, isn't there. Well, um, you know the drill, if I was ten years younger or thirty percent drunker and not seeing your mom...”

  “No worries. You can just help me strategize what to do with Amy to make up for your egregious lack of availability. Mainly sex tips and how to make out, so I don't make a complete fool of myself before she remembers that we're just friends.” Holding up his right hand to stop speech, Josh sighed dramatically.

  “Today was just kissing, but, like the second time I've ever kissed anyone, both her. I know I must suck at it. Oh, and there's a day trip tomorrow, help me talk mom into letting me go?” The conversation drifted into that then, though Joanie didn't seem put off by him mentioning all that other stuff. Which was weird. It was like the idea hardly bothered her at all, his asking for tips like that.

  Not that he'd make a play for his mother's girlfriend, not now that he knew about it. Some of the flirtations they'd gone through were more than he'd have done if they'd told him though. Now it was, hard, if he backed off he felt like she'd think he didn't like her but if he said too much, it wasn't just him being cute or playful anymore, or even just coming on to her, but rather him being a complete dill-weed and possibly being hurtful to Mercy. It made a big difference, knowing, if only in his own mind. It would probably take a while to get used to the new order of things.

  He got up and gestured her over to the cupboards, which were handily close to the fridge too. It was just a small space. Most of what they had was in a can or box, since his cooking skills weren't all that advanced. She looked inside with him for a while and then looked at the wall that would have led to his mother's bedroom if she had x-ray vision. Then of course she'd have seen through his clothing a bunch of times and he'd probably end up with cancer, so he hoped that wa
sn't the case.

  “We could... order in Chinese.” She whispered as if it were some great secret they had to hide from Mercy.

  Josh knew his mother didn't eat Chinese food. He even knew why, which was the totally insane fear that they'd secretly slip dog meat into the dishes. It wasn't rational, and didn't even make sense, especially in the U.S. where dog meat would end up costing you a lot more in the end than using almost anything else would. People loved dogs and slipping them into food would probably have a restaurant not just closed, but burned down. Possibly with the owner locked inside. And if that happened the police would most likely look the other way.

  Joanie liked it though and he was fine with it, so he shrugged.

  “OK, that sounds good.”

  They actually had the food ordered and on the way before Mercy emerged looking ready to go to a meeting that was only pretending to be a party. That sounded like the plan at least. She looked good, dressed in all black, with two inch heels that made her legs look longer and that shouldn't be worn if things were going to get icy out. That thought reminded him about the trip the next day. Sure, he could have gone without asking, but that seemed a little silly. It would suck if she said no, but it wouldn't be the end of the world. He just really wanted to be with Amy while he had the chance.

  It was probably a sign of incredibly low self-esteem, being that desperate for attention.

  Well, not just probably. That and abandonment issues. He'd have to thank Carl for those when he saw him next. Josh knew it wouldn't happen though. He'd keep his mouth shut and try to be polite. They were just the kind of thing that most people had to deal with right? Half the people he knew were from broken families. In that way he was pretty much normal. True, he'd kind of been left nearly alone for a long time, but that was fine. He'd made it, hadn't he? Largely by being responsible.

  Like now.

  That also probably meant he was the world's lamest teenager. Oh well, he'd live.

  Quickly, so that it sounded normal enough for him to be going anywhere, which it just wasn't, Josh explained what he knew of the trip, who was going and why, that being that the waterfall had frozen in the air, which was supposed to be a fantastic sight. It was a bit of a trip though and there was a chance that it would snow, even in Vancouver, which meant that going would be insane. If they got a couple inches of white on the ground the city stopped. Sometimes for days. Mainly because they weren't ready for anything like that. They had four snow plows for an area that could fit something like six New York cities in it. Luckily they had fewer roads. No one knew how to drive on snow either, unless they were from someplace else. He'd never done it at all. Not exactly an amazing thing, since he'd only had a license for four months, but still, a real point. No one else going with them could be much better.

  His mom nodded as she walked toward the door.

  “Use your best discretion. If it's not safe, don't go and for God's sake don't let Amy either. Too many things in my life would fall apart if she died right now.” She kept walking toward the door, her heels making clip-clop noises as she went.

  “And yes,” she said to the room when she got to the door. “I do realize that saying that probably means I'm a psychopath. I don't want the others hurt either though, so keep that in mind too, when you're in therapy years from now trying to recover from your childhood.”

  She left so quickly that Joanie had to yell to get her to stop, if in a playful tone, so that she could hug her first. They didn't kiss in public, just hug. Most people didn't care as much about that. It was a nod to the few remaining homophobes of the world and the larger group of people afraid of anything that had to be explained to children. Those people also feared the sky though, didn't they? It was blue and kids would eventually ask why.

  After a minute his...

  He looked at her and shook his head, causing her to give him a tired and funny look. Then she sighed.

  “I know, I look like something hit me with a hangover stick. It's called alcohol. I suggest never taking it up as a hobby.” She grinned, so obviously thinking that he'd been considering something entirely different, like the fact that they were alone...

  As if they hadn't been before? Now he was a lot less likely to flirt with her. He shook his head again.

  “Not what I was thinking.” It got said quickly, and seriously enough that she broke all eye contact and looked at the floor.

  “Look, Josh, you're a great guy and I even like guys as a rule, current relationship aside, I just... well, I couldn't do anything that would hurt Mercy...” She spoke softly and quickly, which got a bigger head shake.

  “Gee, tell a girl you have a little crush on her and she suddenly thinks you're going to ruffie her Kool-Aid. Chill on that, will you? I was just thinking I don't know what to call you now. I mean, Joanie, obviously, but what exactly is the relationship here? Or is there one? I mean, we're friends, but that doesn't explain why I have a good looking thirty-year old woman that isn't related in here with me alone all night, does it? You're definitely not the babysitter either... Or is that over thinking things? Probably. But that's what I was thinking. Not whatever you clearly were, which seemed to involve you doing strange things with your girlfriend's son. That's all you by the way... you and your dirty, dirty little mind.” It wasn't really, he'd had his share of fantasies, but that was before. Now she was strictly off limits mentally. Unless, of course, she was wearing something cute... or revealing or maybe bending over just right...

  He stopped the thought and looked at her innocently. She wasn't buying it at all.

  “Right, as if you could look at all this and say no. Please.” The gesturing hand mainly waved at her chest, which was pretty nice.

  D-cups? He didn't ask. That sounded about right.

  Looking away he shook his head again. At this rate he was going to end up with whip-lash, he thought. Shaking his head no all the time anymore.

  “Really though? I think most people will get that I'm Joanie and be fine with that. “Joshie has two mommies” doesn't exactly fit with our situation, you know? I suppose you could call me Joanne in grown up situations, since it's my name.” She smiled, because everyone at work, including her own girlfriend, either called her Joanie or Joan. Most of them had no clue at all that it wasn't her real name.

  He'd asked, the second time they'd met, what he should call her and she'd explained then. Apparently the rules still hadn't changed. Cool enough. Josh just didn't want her to feel uneasy, that was all.

  The food came and he paid, out of the Christmas decorating fund, the egg rolls were still warm and crisp and the sweet and sour beef not too bad. That and some white rice did the job for him, for the most part. He had a bite of everything else too though, just to be polite.

  After they finished and had opened their fortune cookies, which always disappointed him personally, this one saying; A sudden conflict will arise.

  Great.

  Just what he needed. He always got things like that in fortune cookies too. Never anything about a great fortune coming his way or meeting the love of his life. Kind of lame. What was the point of breaking the darn things open if he only got bad news? The cookies themselves sucked too. Couldn't they at least give them some kind of flavor?

  They ate sitting at the table, which was normal, nowhere else in the room was safe for any food with either grease or color to it. After they finished Josh puttered around for a few minutes cleaning up. Joanie sat, staring at him for a while, then finally went to the refrigerator and pulled out a single peach from the crisper at the bottom. She gestured with her other hand for him to sit back at the table, then handed it to him.

  The fruit was cold, and a bit too firm for good eating, but she had a mischievous grin on her face.

  “Alright, naughty lesson time. Take a mid-sized bite.”

  It took work, the peach a little tough. He liked them, as a rule, which was why they had them, since he did the shopping, but if she thought he was going to get all “naughty” with a peach th
en the woman obviously had not been paying attention to what he liked. Girls by far.

  She moved in next to him as he chewed, her leg touching his after she shifted the chairs around. Leaning into him just slightly she pointed. Her voice was matter of fact though.

  “OK. Look at the bite mark. The top,” she pointed with her index finger, not touching the sticky line that was being indicated. “Is a lip, the bottom the other one. The goal of kissing isn't to ram your tongue down each other's throats, but to make the other person feel good. Lips are sensitive, so focus your attention there. Start by sucking the lower lip just a little...”

  The descriptions got more exacting after that, but they laughed, especially when he started drooling all over himself.

  “Bite the side of your tongue a little, close your mouth then suck and swallow. It's always better to back off for a second than to slobber all over someone.” Joanie looked at him after about fifteen minutes of this and seemed satisfied enough.

  “That should give you a start. It's not about magical techniques or anything, now you just have to be able to find a clitoris and you'll be set.” A large pointing wave indicated the computer on the far side of the room. “To the Googles!”

  That part was embarrassing, but right there, in full color, Josh could see it. It wasn't like he hadn't looked at porn before, he had. Frequently. It was just that this was the first time he'd looked at anything like it with a woman. Or extreme close ups like this. The erection he got was intense, throbbing, and it didn't help at all that Joanie had moved in next to him again, touching his side with hers every now and then. OK, he was smart enough to realize she didn't mean anything by it, but his hormones weren't. Still, the pictures they looked at were fascinating, close-ups that actually showed where the right bits were. Then they went back to the table and he was handed the peach again.

  “This time hold it sideways.” She laughed with him as he tried to get it right and explained reams of information about what girls felt, how sensitive they could be and what to actually do.