The look on her face matched the pressure of her hand, intense but warm. I sagged back against my seat and said, ‘If I do have a set of pipes on me then I’m going to use them.’ I stopped and flashed her a quick grin. ‘I sound okay in the shower.’
‘Honey,’ she said, throwing her head back and laughing, ‘we all sound good in the shower.’
About half an hour later the three of us descended to the club. Thor started restocking the bar while Liss and I climbed up onto the stage.
She switched on the microphone and tapped it a few times. ‘What are you going to sing?’
I stared at her. I didn’t know any songs.
‘Just give me a la-la,’ she said. ‘Work your way up and down a scale.’ She demonstrated for me.
‘All righty.’ I moved up to the microphone and gripped it nervously with both hands. I opened my mouth but Liss put her hand on top of mine.
‘It’s not an ice-cream cone,’ she said.
I laughed and stepped back a little. Closing my eyes, I channelled Tina Turner and started to sing. When I had finished I re-opened my eyes. Thor had stopped pulling glasses out of the dishwasher and was staring at me. Liss’s mouth was hanging open.
‘That bad?’ I put the microphone back in its holder and stepped back. ‘Oh well, at least I can serve drinks.’
Liss let out a shriek and launched herself at me. She wrapped her arms around me and jumped up and down while she laughed. ‘Oh my,’ she said when she’d finished, ‘I can’t wait to hear you sing a real song.’
‘So… not too bad?’ Relief swept over me. I’d known her for less than twenty-four hours, but I desperately wanted to make her proud.
‘Oh Tess,’ she said, ‘you are going to rock this joint.’
***
Life fell into a routine. Monday to Friday I went to school, studied when I got home and then helped Thor in the bar for a few hours. During the school hours I kept to myself, steering clear of Hillary as much as I could.
We had stopped pretending to like each other the year before when her boyfriend, Stan, had tried to kiss me. She’d rounded the corner at the worst possible time and of course he’d professed he’d thought I was her. But I’d heard him say my name so I knew better.
Even though I didn’t tell her that, she hated me for it anyway. It had only been a matter of time. From the moment Lou walked into our house we had been growing apart. But if I were entirely truthful, our animosity had started long before that. Some people do well having a clone of themselves in their lives. Hillary and I didn’t.
When I was not studying or helping Thor, I listened to Liss’s records. Famous blues singers Mamie Smith, Ida Goodson and Ethel Waters occupied my time and my mind, their rich melodious voices soothing my soul.
I studied their inflections and their voices and I practised their songs. Liss wanted a blues singer to add class to her bar and I was determined to be that singer.
Finally, on the eve of finishing school, Liss let me sing on stage. ‘To see if it was what I really wanted.’
I knew it was. I just had to convince her. My love of books had been replaced by a love of music. I felt like I had found a piece of me I hadn’t known was missing.
I can’t say I wasn’t nervous as I climbed up onto that stage. But it was early in the evening and the club was a little light on in the customer department, so at least there wouldn’t be many people to witness my shame if it all went south for winter.
I tugged at my skirt, making sure it hadn’t done something ridiculous like get caught in my underpants in my last minute dash to the toilet. When I was sure my clothing wasn’t going to cause any embarrassment I picked up the microphone. The soft spattering of conversation across the room did not die out as it normally did when Helene stepped up. Thor gave me a double-thumbs up from behind the bar and Liss waved her wineglass at me.
I closed my eyes and quieted my mind, concentrating on the soft swell of the music. After the first ten seconds my heartbeat slowed and my breathing levelled and I actually began to enjoy myself. Ethel Waters’ ‘Stormy Weather’ filled me up before it flowed out over the room. I kept my eyes shut the entire time, pretending I was alone, pretending only someone special could hear me, pretending I was singing to someone I was yet to meet.
When the music finally ended, a strange noise forced me to open my eyes. Something I had never heard while working in Vegas Ladies.
Applause.
The men clapped and, as I looked out over them, began to stand. Thor put his fingers in his mouth and whistled while Liss wiped her face with the back of her sleeve and tried to clap at the same time. Eva elbowed Brittney until even she began to clap.
I cleared my throat and said into the microphone, ‘Thank you. Next I’d like to sing something a bit more upbeat.’ I nodded at Thor and he started the music to ‘Papa was a Rolling Stone.’
Forty minutes later I finished my set to a standing ovation. Helene high-fived me as she passed me on her way to the stage. I collapsed onto a seat next to Liss and she handed me a drink.
‘What is it?’
She snorted. ‘It’s lemonade. You may be my best singer, but until you turn twenty-one, that’s the strongest thing you’re getting.’
I smiled as I sipped my drink. It had been a wonderful feeling, owning that stage. But not anywhere near as nice as the feeling of finally having a mother-figure in my life.
2
Love Is In The Air
It didn’t take long for the word to spread. Within the month there was standing room only at Vegas Ladies. Helene and I took turns singing, and while she was the one they dreamt about, it was me they came to hear.
I was in my element. Truly happy for the first time that I could remember. And Liss’s excitement as her business grew only added to my happiness.
My happiness was such that the night I looked out over the room and saw Lou the Brain sitting at a table, I only stumbled over a couple of words.
Liss said nothing when I took my usual seat next to her, but I could tell by the tightness of her shoulders and the way she squeezed my knee, that she’d seen him.
‘So,’ she said, ‘had enough for the evening?’
I’d only sung one of my three sets. ‘Nah,’ I said, as if it were a normal question. The last thing I wanted the bastard to know was that he’d rattled me.
Lou was accompanied by a group of men. They all looked to be of European descent, dark hair, dark eyes and dark suits.
‘That’s Jolly Jim,’ Thor said, nodding to the man the rest of them seemed to revolve around. ‘Head of the Mob.’
I glanced at Jolly Jim, a short, balding man with eyes teetering on the edge of crazy, but my eyes were drawn to the young man sitting next to him. If I were a dog, I would have sat up and barked.
‘Who’s that on his left?’
‘That’s Harry. Jolly Jim’s son.’
That information should have been enough to dampen my interest. But as I watched the young man, my interest only grew. And when he knocked back the advances of Brittney and Eva, I found that interest blossoming.
I tried to stop it, I did. I didn’t want to be my mother. Didn’t want to follow in her footsteps. And if I tied my heart to the son of the Mob boss then that was what I would do.
But each time I climbed onto the stage I found myself searching the crowd. And each time I cursed myself for the fool I was. I romanticised him, giving him attributes to match the handsomeness of his face. Attributes he couldn’t possibly have if he ran with the Mob.
My seventeenth birthday came and went without my saying one word to him. The club continued to prosper and Liss redecorated – adding booths along the side walls to increase the seating, and changing the tired carpet.
And then, one night, Hillary showed up at the club. Initially I thought she’d come to find me and anxiety spiked my blood pressure. But then I realised whom she’d come with and my anxiety turned to dread.
I watched as she weaved her way to a booth, Harry a
nd Jolly Jim right behind her. Lou the Brain followed with a man Liss advised me was Mickey. They all sat at the booth closest to the stage.
Apart from our faces, Hillary didn’t resemble me any more. Her blonde hair fell in big curls and her skin-tight dress stopped well short of her knees. Bright red lipstick completed her slut outfit. She nestled in next to Harry far closer than she had to, and I heard a growl come out of my mouth.
‘Oh dear,’ Liss said. ‘That must be Hillary.’
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Of all the men she had to target, it had to be him. I mean, she’d had heaps of boyfriends and this was the first man I was interested in. If I ever summoned the courage to talk to him I would appear an idiot in comparison.
I would have given up on him then and there. Sometimes I wished I had. But at that precise moment, when I was squeaking closed the door to my heart, he looked over at me.
Our gazes met and my breath caught in my throat and suddenly my heartbeat was thundering in my ears and I couldn’t think of anything, anything at all except him. He was all I knew and all I wanted.
‘Oh dear,’ Liss said again in an entirely different voice. ‘I don’t know if you want to open up that particular can of worms.’
‘Worms?’ I said, ripping my eyes away from his. ‘Where?’
She sighed and shook her head and patted me on the shoulder. Thor muttered something about letting nature run its course, but even though I pasted a smile on my face and looked at them, I wasn’t really listening. My brain was caught in a time warp, replaying that look over and over again.
And that night, when I climbed the stairs and sang, I sang just for him.
I took my time as I looked around the room, but my gaze drifted back to him time-and-time again. I tried not to be obvious, but Hillary sat up straighter, looking between me and Harry, and then she snuggled in closer to him and pasted a smug smile on her face.
When I had finished that set and re-taken my seat at the bar, Hillary stood up, straightened her skirt and wove her way through the tables towards me. She didn’t look at me, smiling instead at the other patrons, but as she brushed past me hard enough to spill my drink she hissed, ‘He’s mine.’
I resisted my urge to shove her in the back, take her to the floor and slap her face like I had when we were younger. It would have been satisfying, but I didn’t think Liss wanted that sort of stage show.
Another couple of months passed without my ever speaking to Harry. He became a regular at the club. Sometimes Hillary was with the group, but mostly not, and he never seemed to return her interest.
I had resigned myself to the fact that nothing was ever going to happen when fate, ironically in the shape of Lou the Brain, stepped in.
I didn’t see Lou follow me to the toilets. If I had known he was waiting for me outside I would have stayed in there forever.
But I didn’t and so I opened the door from the ladies’ room to find Lou leaning against the wall. When he saw me he stood up, moving so that he blocked the hall. I would have to brush against him to pass, and the thought of touching him, even just a little, made my skin writhe.
I backed away from him and he followed, his smile making my dinner think about exiting my body.
‘Tess,’ he drawled. ‘Long time no see.’
I felt my back press up against the end of the corridor. ‘Not long enough.’
His smile turned to a sneer. ‘You always did have a smart mouth on you.’
He stopped just in front of me. Too close. Far too close to allow my brain to function normally. It was jabbering and blubbering and dancing around inside my skull.
He reached out a hand to touch my neck and a voice, a wonderfully rich voice, said, ‘Is everything okay here?’
Lou jumped away from me and said, ‘Of course everything is fine. Why wouldn’t it be?’
‘Dad wants to talk to you. Something about an inconsistency in the books.’
The look on Lou’s face changed from annoyed to worried. He pushed his hand over his head, patting down the hair combed over his bald patch, and then he left.
I took a deep breath and looked up at my hero, staring into his deep brown eyes. The thundering was back in my ears and my heart was doing all sorts of crazy things. I tried to tell myself it was a delayed response to Lou the Brain but I knew better.
I didn’t even know this man and yet, I was smitten.
Part of me knew my reaction to him was ridiculous. A girl’s fantasy built out of nothing. But even though I knew that, I couldn’t control the hormones racing around my body. They zinged and they exploded and generally set me up to make a fool of myself.
‘Harry.’ My voice came out in a whisper. I cleared my throat and tried again. ‘Thank you Harry.’
He took a step closer. ‘You have the most wonderful voice.’
I had a wonderful voice? His was like melted chocolate oozing over my soul.
‘Thank you.’ I blushed and examined the tips of my shoes. They were starting to look scuffed.
‘You’re nothing like Hillary.’
I jerked my head up at the sound of her name coming out of his mouth. I felt like something that was mine had been defiled.
‘I’m not as….’ How best to describe this without looking like a total loser? ‘Worldly as she is.’
He studied me as if I were a puzzle waiting to be solved. ‘And yet you live here.’
My chin came up and my hands planted themselves on my hips. ‘Liss is wonderful. She saved me.’ I stopped short of saying what she had saved me from.
From a life like my mother’s. From Lou the Brain. And yet here I was, paving a road towards the same town my Mom resided in.
I smiled at him and shook my head. ‘It’s okay. You wouldn’t understand.’ Why would he think I needed saving from a life he lived in?
‘I might,’ he said, leaning in so that I could just hear him. ‘I just might.’
I licked my lips, trying to moisten them enough to speak. ‘How do you know Hillary?’ Oh please don’t let her be his girlfriend.
‘She works for my Dad. As a secretary.’
‘Oh.’ I hadn’t known where Hillary was working. ‘So, do you spend much time with her?’ The words came out sounding way too jealous and needy. I resisted the urge to smack myself in the head.
But Harry seemed to like what he heard. He leant in even closer and stared at my lips.
I licked them again.
‘Tess.’ Thor’s voice boomed down the corridor. ‘You ‘kay girl?’
I jumped away from Harry, brushing down my skirts in a move that only made me look guiltier. For goodness’ sake. It’s not like we were doing anything.
‘Oh,’ Thor said when he saw who I’d been talking to. ‘How ya doing Harry?’
‘Good thank you Thor. You need any more help with the bookkeeping, you let me know.’
‘I will Harry, I will.’
Harry squeezed past Thor and headed back down the corridor, but when he got to the end he glanced back over his shoulder at me and smiled.
I heard a clang in my mind as the trap around my heart slammed shut.
‘We weren’t doing anything,’ I said.
‘You know that only makes it sound like you were.’ Thor’s amusement was written all over his face.
I sighed. ‘I know. But we weren’t.’
‘Hey, I believe you. The word on the street is that that one’s a gentleman.’
I followed Thor back down the corridor towards the Club.
‘And he’s real smart. Studying to be an accountant.’
Every single word was another nail in the coffin that held my free will.
Helene was finishing her set when I got back to the bar. Liss studied me with a worried expression on her face but I smiled and nodded. I took a sip of my water while I tried to still my fluttering heart.
That smile.
It had been intimate. Breathless. Warm.
It had stripped me naked and yet, I hadn’t felt violated.
I had felt treasured.
I climbed onto the stage and picked up the microphone, determined not to look at him. Determined not to sing for him. But as the first notes of ‘Moondance’ started up, I knew I was in trouble.
Time-and-time again my eyes drifted back to meet his, until finally I was singing to him alone.
‘Well, I wanna make love to you tonight, I can’t wait ‘til the morning has come.’
A small, confident smile set up residence on his face as he met me stare-for-stare.
Oh yes, I was in deep, deep trouble.
***
The first flowers turned up the next day. Not your typical long stem roses for Harry. No, these were a cacophony of colour and shapes and sizes. A huge bunch of blossoms that smelt divine. I’m embarrassed by how much time I spent with my nose buried in those flowers. But they were my first ever – if you don’t count the bunch of dandelions Smelly Stan gave me in grade three, and I loved them.
‘There you go,’ Liss said when she brought me in a vase for them. She placed it on the dressing table and put a few more identical ones with it.
‘They should all fit in one,’ I said.
‘Honey,’ she said, ‘if the way that man was staring at you is any indication, I’m sure there will be plenty more where these came from.’
She was right. The next bunch turned up that afternoon. A huge arrangement of wildflowers. The next morning the sunflowers arrived, and that afternoon it was tulips.
‘Man’s got some class,’ Liss said, helping me carry a coffee table into my room. I had run out of surfaces to place vases on.
I was disappointed when no more arrived the next morning. But not about the flowers – I mean seriously, I think I had enough. I was disappointed because I thought he had lost interest, or met someone else, or maybe given into Hillary’s charms. Of course my imagination put far more detail into those fears than that. It took those sketches and turned them into works of art.
A blonde, no a brunette. Friend of the family, no someone he had met at College. One of his professors as besotted with him as I was.
Tess's Tale (The Chanel Series Book 3) Page 3