by Marta Perry
And she suspected she’d need a measure of common sense and patience for herself, too.
CHAPTER THREE
Daniel and his children came for supper the next evening, as her mother had said, and Leah found herself on pins and needles throughout the meal, wondering if Daniel would mention the visit of an Englischer to the schoolhouse the previous afternoon.
He didn’t. Because he knew it would make her uncomfortable? She wasn’t sure, but she was grateful. Her family would know about John Kile’s return soon enough, but it didn’t seem right to talk to anyone else before telling Rachel.
By the time everyone went out to the backyard after the meal, her tension had eased. Daniel leaned against the corner of the porch, deep in conversation with her father about planting times in the area. His strong face was intent, and he apparently was soaking up advice.
He showed an appealing deference to the older man’s opinion that she appreciated. Daadi might think he was ready to retire, but he still knew more about farming in Pleasant Valley than just about anyone.
Rachel and her family were coming for dessert, so surely she could find an opportunity to talk with Rachel about Johnny. Then perhaps she could stop feeling as if she carried the burden of his return all alone.
She’d have to be careful about the telling of it, though. Rachel’s sweet face showed every emotion she felt, and this was going to be difficult news both to give and to receive.
Sunlight still slanted across the yard, making the yellow trumpets of the daffodils at the corner of the house glow as if they were made of gold. She drew in a breath, loving the mingled scents that said spring was here at last. Every season had its own beauty, but this time of rebirth and growth surely must be close to the Creator’s heart.
Her brother Mahlon, still as enthusiastic as a kid about games despite his twenty-two years, had put up the croquet set, and the moment Rachel’s family arrived, he recruited all the children to play.
Daniel’s six-year-old, Jonah, seized a mallet. Mahlon put his big hands over Jonah’s small ones to help him hit the red ball through a wicket, and Jonah laughed with pleasure.
“I see that your brother is wonderful gut with children.” Daniel’s voice startled her, and she swung around to find him behind her.
Had Daniel sought her out to talk about John’s visit yesterday? As the parent of children in her care, he certainly had a right to be concerned about who visited the schoolhouse.
“Ja, he is. We tease him that he’d best be sure his intended wants a big family.”
She’d spoken lightly, out of nervousness probably, and as she looked up at Daniel, she caught something—a tightening, maybe—in his face. The look disappeared as quickly as it had come, though, so maybe she was imagining it.
Sun lines crinkled at the corners of Daniel’s deep blue eyes, as if he dismissed whatever had caused the reaction. The color of his shirt echoed that blue, making his eyes even more vivid.
“Mahlon’s bride will be a fortunate woman, it seems. Is he keeping company with someone?”
“He and Esther Miller have it already settled between them, I think. At least, folks say that Esther’s father is planting a long row of celery this spring.”
“Gut, since they’ll want plenty for the wedding feast come November.” His eyebrows lifted. “And is your father planting much celery this year?”
The question’s implication startled her. “I think our Anna is enjoying her rumspringa too much to settle down just yet.”
He glanced toward her sister, who was chasing Jonah around the edge of the croquet lawn, heedless of the way the breeze tossed her hair loose from beneath her kapp.
“Anna is a lively girl. But she is not the only unmarried daughter of the house.”
His gaze came back to her face, and the question in his blue eyes startled her. For just an instant her breath seemed to hitch before she got control of herself.
“I don’t think Daad will be planting any celery for me. I have no plans to marry.”
Then she realized that his intent expression and his words might well refer to John’s visit to the school yesterday. He wasn’t expressing interest in her. He was wondering if John was courting her. She could hardly deny it without bringing up a subject she had no wish to discuss with him.
“Your family has made us feel so welcome.” He changed the subject, perhaps seeing that he’d embarrassed her by his comment. “The children were happy to eat someone else’s cooking tonight. I’m not very handy in the kitchen.”
He was trying to make it easier for her, but he couldn’t. No one could. The timing that had brought Johnny to the schoolhouse when Daniel was there had forced Daniel into the secret, like it or not.
She took a breath, trying to find the right words to acknowledge the situation. She had a quick look around to be sure no one was within earshot.
“Daniel, about John Kile’s visit to the schoolhouse yesterday—it’s obvious you haven’t said anything to anyone. I appreciate that.”
His face sobered. “I don’t know people to exchange gossip with. But I would not like to think that my children’s teacher was being influenced by her English friend.”
“He’s not—” She stopped, trying to organize her thoughts. Naturally he’d assume John was there out of interest in her. “John Kile was Amish once.”
He nodded, his gaze serious on her face. “I thought that when I saw him.”
“How could you tell?” She had thought John typically English herself, with his fancy car and his blue jeans.
“Something about the way he looked at the school, maybe. As if he’d belonged there once.”
“He attended school there for eight years.” Sorrow swept over her, taking her by surprise. “I didn’t let him go inside.”
Had she been unkind? She’d thought only that she didn’t want to be alone with him, not that he might have feelings about the place.
“He gave up that right when he left the church,” Daniel said, his tone uncompromising. “Still, I’m sorry if his visit upset you.”
It had. Rachel, not knowing that she had something huge to face, was helping Mamm put two rhubarb pies and a cake on the picnic table under the trees.
“He’s Rachel’s brother,” she said softly, her heart aching for her friend. “Her twin. He came to me because he wants me to be—well, a go-between, I suppose. I must talk to her about whether the family is willing to see him.”
“I see.” His expression was veiled. “So he’s just the brother of your friend.”
Her chin came up at that. “Have you listened to gossip about me already, Daniel Glick? If so, you may as well hear it from me. John and I planned to marry once, but he chose to go English instead.”
For a moment he didn’t speak, and she had no idea what he was thinking. His face had tightened again. In disapproval? She wasn’t sure of his emotion, but it was something dark.
“I see,” he said at last. “No, I didn’t know, but I’m sorry for your loss.”
The sincerity of his tone was so intense that she couldn’t doubt he meant it. His sympathy wiped away her irritation and made her ashamed that she’d spoken so abruptly.
“I’m sorry. I’m the one who should apologize.” She took a deep breath, trying to ease the tightness in her throat. “It’s just—People will talk about it again, once they know he’s back.”
“You could be careful, not give them anything new to talk about.”
“Like meeting him at the schoolhouse?” Her temper, always so controlled, flared.
Daniel’s strong face was impassive. “You are my children’s teacher, an Amish schoolteacher, chosen for the position because of your faith and your character. What you do, who you see—that matters to all the children who are your responsibility.”
Before she could say a word, he walked off toward the croquet game.
Leah stood at the end of the picnic table, setting out forks and napkins while she rehearsed all the things she should have said to D
aniel. Unfortunately, he’d spoken nothing but the truth. It was too bad that he seemed to have the ability to bring out the emotions she usually kept under such careful control.
Rachel slipped an arm around her waist. “Why so deep in thought?”
Leah shook off the fear that there might have been a veiled threat in Daniel’s final words. Time enough to worry about that later. Now—now she had to tell Rachel about Johnny.
“I must talk with you, Rachel.” There was no easy way to break this news. She’d just have to come out with it. At least at the moment everyone else seemed occupied, either with the game or with their own talk. “I’ve seen Johnny.”
Rachel’s breath caught. “Our Johnny? Seen him? He’s here in Pleasant Valley?”
“He came to the schoolhouse yesterday, wanting me to talk to you for him, to tell you why he’s back.”
Sudden hope blossomed on her friend’s face. “He wants to come home? To repent and be one of us again?” Her voice lifted in joy.
It hurt Leah’s heart to destroy that hope, but it was best to do it quickly, since it must be done. “No. I’m sorry, Rachel.”
The hope faded, and Rachel’s eyes filled with tears. She turned, hiding her face from the playing children. Leah gave her time, her arm encircling her friend’s waist. She longed so deeply to help her, but some pains couldn’t be soothed by even the most comforting words.
Finally Rachel managed a feeble smile. “Ach, I never really thought that would happen. Johnny always wanted the outside world too strongly.”
“You couldn’t stop hoping he’d come back to us,” Leah said softly.
Rachel shook her head. “Why is he here, then? What does he want if not to rejoin the community?”
Leah picked her words carefully, feeling a flicker of anger toward John. He should be explaining this himself instead of putting it onto her.
“He’s working with that doctor who’s doing the research on genetic diseases that affect the children. He said he’d be here for six months, at least.”
“Six months?” Rachel bit her lip. “It will be hard, having him near that long but not one of us.”
“Did you have any idea of what he was doing?”
“No.” The sidelong look seemed a little guilty. “Just that he’d gone to college for some kind of science.”
“You never told me that.” She’d thought that she and her closest friend shared everything.
Rachel’s gaze slid away from Leah’s, and she fiddled with the forks much as Leah had done, as if her hands needed to be busy. “You seemed like you’d forgotten him. I didn’t want to bring it all up again and make you feel bad. Did I do wrong?”
“No. It’s all right.” But she hadn’t forgotten. She’d just learned to hide her feelings.
“What does he want from us, then?” Rachel’s eyes went dark with misery, hurting Leah’s heart. “Why did he come to you?”
“He wants to see you and the rest of your family. He asked me to tell you. He’s coming to the schoolhouse tomorrow to hear your answer.”
Her friend’s eyes widened. “But I can’t tell him anything, not so soon. Not until I talk to Mamm and Daadi about it. And how will I do that?”
“I know it’s hard.” She thanked the Lord that she’d never had to face that particular burden with her parents. “But you should tell them right away, before they hear about him being here from someone else.”
“But if no one knows but you—”
“Daniel Glick saw him at the school,” she said quickly, before Rachel could imagine this secret would keep. “He hasn’t said anything, but anyone could see John, could start talking about his coming back. You know how fast that news would spread.”
“You’re right. I can’t be a coward about it. I’ll talk to them tonight.” She shook her head, worry darkening her eyes. “I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to hurt them.”
Leah squeezed her in a quick hug. “They haven’t forgotten about him. Maybe they’ll be relieved to know what he’s doing. Anyway, it must be done.”
“Oh, I know that. It’s just so hard. I want to protect them from hurt. You’d feel the same, wouldn’t you?”
Leah glanced at her mother. Mamm sat in a lawn chair, watching the children play. She was smiling, but her face seemed thin and tired.
“Ja, of course I would. I do. It’s strange. All these years we’ve relied on our parents, and now we need to care for them. It seems we’re changing places, doesn’t it?”
Rachel nodded in quick understanding. “How is your mamm?”
“She says she’s doing fine, but fighting the cancer has taken a lot out of her. She and my father have decided to move to the grossdaadi haus.”
Rachel’s face expressed all that she might be reluctant to say. “So your brother and his family will be moving into the house. What about you and Anna?”
“That’s what Anna wants to know.” It was a relief to pour it out to someone who would understand and keep it to herself. “Levi and Barbara say that nothing will change, that we should keep our own rooms, but she’s expecting again, and—”
“And it’s only a matter of time until she wants those rooms for her family.” Rachel shook her head. “Even if she didn’t, you know how hard it will be to live in another woman’s house.” Now it was Rachel’s turn to give a comforting hug. “What will you do?”
“Nothing for a bit. I haven’t had time to think it through. I knew it would come sometime, but I didn’t think it would be so soon.”
Rachel nodded, eyes clouding. “I know. It’s odd, isn’t it? One day life seems settled and routine, and the next it’s turned upside down, as if a storm came and tipped us all on our heads.”
“Ja.” That was surely how she’d felt lately. She took a breath. “Well, we can get through it. Somehow.”
Rachel shot her a sidelong glance. “I saw you talking to Daniel. It looked as if you were finding a lot to say to each other.”
“Don’t matchmake,” Leah warned. Was everyone in the community trying to team her up with Daniel?
“Well, don’t you dismiss the idea too quickly.” Her expression was serious. “I know it’s early to be thinking this, but wouldn’t it be better to be living in your own house with a family to love, rather than feel like a boarder in your sister-in-law’s house?”
“I don’t plan to marry.” And even if she did, it wouldn’t be to Daniel Glick. She valued her independence too much for that. “Never mind about Daniel. What shall I tell John?”
“Say I love him. Say he must give me more time. That’s all I can tell him now.”
John wouldn’t like that, any more than she’d like telling him, but there was nothing she could do about it.
Daniel found his gaze straying to Leah Beiler, even while he talked with her father about the best place to buy a buggy horse. Teacher Leah was an interesting mixture of gentleness and spirit. He just hoped that spirit wasn’t leading her toward trouble.
Did her father know about the return of his daughter’s onetime sweetheart? The older man’s face was placid as he puffed on his pipe, but he suspected Elias Beiler wasn’t one to show his feelings easily.
“Your young ones settling down in school all right?” Elias nodded toward Matthew, who was helping Elizabeth knock a croquet ball through a wicket.
“They seem to be doing fine. Teacher Leah has made them feel right at home already.”
A faint smile creased Elias’s weathered face. “Our Leah is a gut teacher, she is. Not that I wouldn’t rather see her married and with young ones of her own, but we must take what the Lord sends.”
Daniel nodded. At the moment, Leah was in close conversation with Rachel, probably about the return of John Kile. Sooner, rather than later, it would be public knowledge, but despite his concerns, he was just as glad the spreading of it hadn’t come from him.
“Will you be missing lots of kin back there in Lancaster County, Daniel?”
Elias only meant to express kindly interes
t, but even so, Daniel felt himself stiffen. Talking about his life there would lead inevitably to the reasons he’d left, and he wasn’t ready to discuss that with strangers. Not yet, anyway.
“My parents hope to come for a visit later in the summer, once we’re settled in. Maybe help with the harvest.”
“Good to have extra hands around when the crops start to come in, especially for a man without a wife to help him.”
Was that meant to be a question about his wife, or was it a hint as to whether he might be looking for a new helpmate now that he was settling in Pleasant Valley? That was how an Amish father’s thoughts would go, for sure. Daniel managed a meaningless smile.
“It’ll be wonderful gut to have them come for a visit. Now I’d best get Jonah. He’s probably getting tired.”
His younger son, who had just run across the lawn to throw himself at Teacher Leah, didn’t look in the least tired, but it was a way to end a conversation that was cutting too near the bone.
He couldn’t fool himself any more than he could anyone else. Most folks here had kin back in Lancaster County, and sooner or later someone would receive a letter with all the details about what had happened to his wife. To his children.
Time. That was what he wanted now, time for the children to settle down and feel at home. Then it would hurt less to have everyone know about them.
Leah smiled, bending over Jonah to say something that made him giggle, and a flicker of concern went through Daniel. Leah said she wasn’t yearning for her fence-jumper fiancé, but maybe she was. He didn’t want his children getting too close to a woman who could be tempted by the life outside their community.
He went quickly to them, then grabbed Jonah and tossed him in the air.
“Are you a bird then, Jonah Glick?”
“I think he’s a barn swallow,” Leah said, laughter filling her green eyes. Hair the color of corn silk was drawn back to the bun under her kapp, but a few tendrils had worked their way loose. They curled against the creamy skin of her cheeks.