by Lara Swann
“Oh, fuck…” I mutter it, I can’t help myself, and I hear him chuckle.
Actually fucking chuckle.
The bastard.
But the feel of that against me just makes me shudder more, and I’m squirming against him now, trying to deal with the hot intensity of his mouth. Josh is stronger than I ever knew, though, and I can’t move at all as I moan and try to thrust forward, my pussy pulsing and spasming with need.
“Fuck, Josh…I think…fuck.”
It becomes too much a moment later, and I cry out as the orgasm overtakes me, the washing over my body and every nerve tensing and contracting and making my body rock and spasm.
He stays with me throughout it, that talented mouth and tongue not letting up for an instant, until I’m shuddering through the aftershocks and moaning his name. When I finally get myself under control, he looks up at me with that same, powerful smile, and I watch his tongue slip out to taste my juices as I moan again, unable to help myself.
I’m still gasping for breath as he slowly makes his way up again, kissing and nuzzling all over my body and making every part of me feel sensitized and on fire from his touch.
It isn’t until we’re face to face again, his fingers tangling in my hair and breathing hard together, that I see the strain and need on his face too.
“God, Cassie…you…fuck it…incredible.”
I smile, slightly dazed, but still feeling an aching need inside that hasn’t been touched yet. It takes that thought for me to realize his hard cock is lying against my thigh, hot and pulsing and enough to make me shudder again. I reach down, unable to resist running my fingers over his chest until I get to that light spattering of hair, narrowing into a ‘V’ and taking me down to what I really want.
He doesn’t stop me, and his eyes flicker as I finally get my hand around his cock.
I gasp, then bite my lip, unable to help myself. I’ve always known Josh wasn’t small, but…fuck.
I want that.
I can feel the silken softness of that sensitive skin, covering pure heated steel that promises to be exactly what I need right now. My pussy contracts again, sensitive and aching from the orgasm, but still empty and wanting to feel Josh.
He nips at my neck as I touch him, stroking gently, almost reverently. I’ve never felt quite this way before.
Sex has always been fun, but this feels…different. I’m used to light and easy. Not having an emotion reaction to some guy’s cock.
But this isn’t some guy, either.
I push that thought out of my mind as Josh looks up at me, the strain on his face even more obvious.
“Cassie…” My name sounds rough on his lips. Rough, and perfect. “I need…fuck it…”
“What?” I say, unable to hold back. “What do you need, Josh?”
I tighten my grip on him as I talk, suddenly wanting to give him anything and everything. And hoping that what he wants is the same thing my body is craving.
Instead, he digs one hand into the pillow beside my head, grunting.
“Fuck it, you keep…doing that…I won’t be able to hold back.” He mutters, voice turning harsh.
“So, don’t hold back.” I say, far more breathy than I was intending.
He grunts again. “I don’t…have…”
I nibble his ear, knowing what he’s going to say.
Of course he doesn’t. This wasn’t a fucking-each-other vacation. Just a pretending to be my boyfriend one.
I push that thought away, too. I can’t deal with that shit right now.
“I’m on the pill. You get tested after every relationship. Please don’t fucking tell me Katie was the one exception to that.”
He blinks, obviously surprised.
Maybe that it’s actually me, Cassie staring back at him, the one girl who knows him that well. Maybe that I’m thinking clearly enough to point that out.
He shouldn’t be surprised by either.
I’ve always been detail oriented - especially when it comes to getting what I want.
“No…” He finally gets out. “Katie…wasn’t an exception.”
I smile slowly, and know how lascivious I must look like this. Lying under him, my hair splayed out and his fist tangled in it, my legs spread and my body open and aching and wanting.
It only turns me on more, and I stroke Josh again, licking my lips as I do, and tugging him forward to position him exactly where I want him.
He groans as he presses up against my slick entrance, and I thrust forward, rolling my hips and shifting so that my arms are around his neck, pulling him into me.
“God…Cassie…” He grunts, and we’re close enough that I can see the haze of lust dimming his eyes now.
He pushes a little, tempting and teasing and I moan in time with it, needing so much more.
“This is…what I…need.” He mutters against me, breathing hard.
And then he’s inside me, with one strong thrust that has my body arching up to meet him. I’m sensitive and aching and desperate for him, and that stroke sets my whole body alight.
“Oh fuck.” I get that much out before I’m lost in the slow, steady way he starts fucking me.
He takes my mouth in his, and then even if I could think I can’t possibly speak. Instead all I can think about is how good he feels - his thick, hard cock stretching me and taking me hard.
The desperate ache becomes endless, tantalizing pleasure, and I can feel that hot need building in me again, quicker this time. I hold onto him, clutching his shoulders as we kiss and writhe together on the bed, my hips slipping and sliding against the already-sticky sheets.
I wrap my legs around his hips and he buries himself deeper, his grunts becoming harsher as he starts picking up the pace. He breaks the kiss to bury his mouth against my neck, nibbling and sucking and kissing there until I’m crying out with the hot shivers of pleasure he’s sending all through me.
“Josh…” I say. I keep saying it. Just over and over again as my eyes slip closed and I feel myself spiraling towards that endless explosion again.
My name is on his lips too, urging me on, cursing and claiming and telling me just how good I feel, my wet pussy wrapped around his cock and gripping him hard.
He shifts, just barely, changing the angle so he’s knocking against my clit with every thrust. That has me clenching and spasming around the thick pulsing of his cock inside me, and my breath gets lighter and higher as I get closer and closer to my peak.
“Come for me, Cassie.” His guttural voice sitrs me even further, and I can sense the last remnants of his control there. “I want to hear you scream my name.”
That’s enough to send me over the edge, and then I give him exactly what he demanded - screaming and crying out as everything inside me contracts and clamps down on that blissful hardness inside me.
My whole body surges with the waves of pleasure crashing through me, and I finally hear him grunt in my ear, as hearing me becomes too much for him to control himself any longer. He pulls out almost to the limit, then pounds into me again, once…twice…and fuckkk.
Streams of warmth hit me inside, and I shudder with the aftershocks as his cock pulses and throbs inside me. Our lips find each other again, even breathless and weak and totally spent. We can’t help it. We kiss desperately, our tongues joining every part of our bodies together, as we cling to each other while we come down from the intensity of that climax.
It takes a long time before we finally break apart, rolling to lie side-by-side as flashes of light prick the inside of my eyelids.
The air around us is blissfully cool, a relieving counterpoint to the heat of our bodies together and the sweat and passion between the sheets.
But I can’t imagine ever being cold again.
Our hands find each other, then our legs rub against one another, and within a few moments, my head is cradled against his shoulder again.
My eyes drift closed as neither of us says anything, still breathing heavily.
Still over
whelmed by how fucking good that felt.
And before my mind can catch up, my body’s exhaustion takes over.
Spent and sated and thoroughly satisfied.
Chapter Eleven
Cassie
As soon as I wake up the next morning, I realize what I’ve done.
I fucked my best friend.
That’s all it takes for panic to set in.
Very carefully, I detach myself from where he’s still sleeping beside me, sending furtive glances back to make sure I haven’t disturbed him.
When I finally make it out of the bed and gently replace the covers, I step back and shiver.
The room is still fucking cold.
And the piece-of-shit AC is still bumbling away, blaring more chilled air out at me.
I send it a glare, as if it’s the only reason I’m in this mess at all, and wrap my arms around myself as I dance on my toes.
Sometime last night, all those night clothes fell by the wayside and now I’m unmistakably bare.
Yes, when—
I force those images out of my mind and look back at Josh, his expression peaceful and smooth, with the hint of a smile curving his lips that I don’t even want to guess at.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
The reality of what we’ve done hits me like a tidal wave, and my heart sinks into my stomach.
He shifts, just a little, and that’s all I need to wake me up properly.
I flee to the bathroom, shutting the door as quietly as I can, and then slamming the lock.
I lean against it, goosebumps spreading across my body from the cold, and close my eyes.
It would be so much easier if the ground just swallowed me whole right now.
It doesn’t.
Instead I’m left wondering how long it will be until he wakes up. Until I have to meet his eyes, knowing what we did. Picturing it so vividly in my mind.
And knowing that…seeing him lying there this morning, one leg splayed out from under the covers, hair flopping down over his eyes…
All I wanted was to do it again.
I feel stretched and sore and used in all the best ways, and every time those images of last night flash before my eyes, I can feel the answering throb deep inside me. The need for his gorgeous, thick cock to fill me again.
If it was anyone else - anyone else - I’d call it an awesome night of sex, go around smiling smugly all day, and try and arrange for a second round sometime.
But it’s not.
It’s Josh.
And…I have no idea what that means.
This wasn’t supposed to happen.
We weren’t supposed to fuck for real.
Even if I’ve been thinking about it…more than I should.
Fuck it.
Reluctantly, I stumble over to the sink and finally splash some water on my face. It doesn’t quite wake me up from some crazy-improbable dream like I’m hoping, but it does remind me how fucking cold I am.
I shiver again, and then step into the shower, giving in to the idea that the day is going to continue either way, and I can’t hide in here forever.
The warm spray makes me sigh in relief, and as I wash I find my hand creeping lower, touching the puffy, sensitive folds of my pussy as my mind drifts back to last night.
It shouldn’t, and I shouldn’t let it. But I can’t help myself.
It was so fucking good.
Of course Josh had to actually be right about how fucking good he is in bed.
The idea of it has never been the slightest bit more than an amusement before, but for some reason this week has screwed with my mind.
And after last night…I have no idea how we can continue as if nothing has happened.
Or if you even want to continue as if nothing has happened.
I gasp a little as I push two fingers inside, a poor comparison to the thickness of his cock only hours earlier, but enough of a reminder to have me leaning back against the shower wall, my thumb circling my clit as I imagine the way he fucked me - a slow, infuriating build to something so deliciously hard, fast and rough that I can still feel it today.
The usual slow, sensual climb towards pleasure comes a lot faster this time, heat rushing through my body and my pussy clenching hard around my fingers as I finally let all the thoughts and feelings and sensations that I’d been pushing away overwhelm me and take me higher.
I bite my lip to keep from crying out as I imagine Josh kneeling before me in the shower, his tongue and fingers working me as I hold onto him, quivering with pent up lust and need.
Oh, fuck.
It all comes over me much quicker than I’d anticipated, the sudden rushing pleasure making me shake and shudder under the warm spray as my body tenses with my climax.
By the time my eyes open, I’m breathing raggedly and trying to calm my racing heartbeat, my head still spinning from how high I got so quickly.
It takes another few minutes before I can focus enough to finish in the shower, my body feeling slightly weak and not wanting to work properly.
I can feel my pussy aching and throbbing with the aftereffects, and as I rinse myself off, my mind wanders to the sight of Josh’s impressive cock far more than it should.
Well, that didn’t fix any of my problems.
In fact, it might have made them worse.
But I feel better anyway.
At least until I finally wrap a towel around my body and leave the safety of the bathroom - to find Josh leaning against the wall opposite, waiting for me.
I freeze, immediately wondering whether he’d heard me only moments ago. I was quiet, deliberately quiet, but still…
I feel myself flush all the way up to my ears, and hope to god that it’s covered by the pink tinge of my skin from the shower. Or that he just puts it down to what we did last night.
Yes, because that’s a good alternative.
I meet his gaze, and he smiles.
That same cocky smile I’ve seen so many times before.
The morning-after ‘I just got laid’ smile. The one that always told me what he’d been up to the night before.
The one we’d laughed about together.
My stomach twists, and suddenly all I can think about is all those girls. All the ones that came before me. And will come after.
And now you’re one of them.
The awkwardness that I’d just started to shake off a little comes rushing back, and I step away from the bathroom door without brushing past him.
His smile quirks up in the corner, and I swear I can see the amusement in his expression as he walks into the now-vacant bathroom.
Bastard.
I get dressed quickly as I hear the water start running in the bathroom, and then pace back and forward in the room, trying to calm down. I can’t tell whether I’m pissed off, embarrassed, horny or…what. But it’s not good.
And it doesn’t help that that smile is sexy as fuck, and there’s part of me that still wants to jump him.
I run my hands through my hair and glance at the bathroom doorway again.
We should have a proper conversation about this.
Work out what on earth just happened, what it means, and how the fuck it’s going to affect what we do in front of my family.
But for the first time I can remember, I feel awkward and uncomfortable around Josh. And I can’t even work out what I want, or how that conversation should end.
So I do the only thing I can think of. I decide to avoid it entirely.
I knock on the door on my way out, and call out to him.
“I’m going to breakfast early.”
I don’t bother explaining why. I’m sure it’s obvious. And anything I could say would only look worse.
Then I leave before he can respond.
The moment I’m out of our room, my whole body relaxes just a little, and I sigh with relief.
Part of it is the reassuring warmth of the hallway around me, but I’d be lying if I said it was the main reason.
; Now just to get through…what, the day? The rest of the week?
I try to switch my mind off from the relentless thoughts - and the moment I arrive at breakfast, I find the perfect solution.
“Ellie! Lucas!” I give them a wide smile that doesn’t quite match the way I’m feeling, and they have the innocence to believe it.
I slide into the seat in between them both and smile briefly at Maria opposite before starting a rapt conversation with her two kids. I can see her looking slightly bemused, but she doesn’t question me, and after a few minutes of playing with their food and trying to encourage them to eat it, my mood starts to settle a little.
It’s always been like that for me. However I’m feeling, once I start focusing on caring for someone else, my own problems don’t seem to matter so much. Part of the reason I always wanted to be a doctor.
It’s not until Josh walks in and the conversation in the room ebbs that I look up from the slightly nonsensical discussion I’m having with Lucas.
Josh glances over at me, notices the full table around me - another benefit of being wedged in between Ellie and Lucas - and our eyes meet for a brief moment before I look away, turning back to the kids.
Another moment, and he finds a space at the other end of the table. I breathe a faint sigh of relief, and try to focus on exclaiming over the snap, crackle and pop! of Ellie’s cereal.
“Hey, have you two had a fight or something?” Beth’s voice from the other side of the table, directed at Josh but as loud and blunt as ever.
I can sense him looking over this way, and that pit in my stomach expands as I feel like everyone’s attention is on me. The last thing I want is for anyone to pick up on what’s going on - even if I was the one that abandoned Josh for my niece and nephew.
“I’d hardly call it a fight.” Josh says, and I wince at the irritation in his tone. “We’re just grumpy from spending the night in an ice-room. Should never have let a woman touch the AC.”
I blink, stopping mid-sentence as it takes me a moment to realize what the hell he’s talking about.