by Ines Johnson
Chapter 29
Hadrian
Vampires take to resting because we can't be out in the sun. Because of the burning and death consequences. Repercussions that no longer interest me.
I peel the tattered dress from Cari’s body. There are a few cuts and bruises along her cheek and arms. I bite my tongue. As I kiss each wound I allow drops of my blood to cover her flesh, healing her as I make love to her.
This is my first time making love. For far too long my hands have been instruments of pain. Not tonight. Not ever with her.
I enter her slowly, pausing after each inch I gain into her sweet heat. Cari is eager, greedy to be fully introduced to my cock. I pin her arms down over her head. Though I’ll never hurt her, I still need to dominate her.
Her body tenses when I finally give her what she wants. My hips grind into her pelvis. My balls rest against her ass. The fine hairs covering her mons tickle the skin of my lower belly. I own every inch of this woman, yet I want more.
I begin to rock into her. It doesn’t take long to realize that I have no hope of lasting long. But that’s fine. We have the rest of her life.
I don't sleep a wink after making love with Cari. My body feels more alive than when I actually was alive. I revel in it as I gaze down at her sleeping form.
She says I make her feel warm.
Running my hands over her flesh, my fingertips feel singed. Pulling her back to my chest, my heart burns. Throwing my leg over hers and running my toes over her smooth calves, my loins reignite.
I don't press my need for her. She sleeps like the dead in my arms. I have a moment of panic realizing that one day she will grow old and die.
That’s fine. Old age doesn’t scare me or turn me off. I refuse to have her die young. She will live a full life under my watchful eye.
Her human body is so fragile. If her bones break there is no guarantee they’ll heal. If her flesh tears, there might be a time when I can't knit it back together.
The thought of losing her turns me cold.
She is mine to protect until she grows old and dies. And when she does, I will go with her. There will truly be nothing left for me here in a world without Carignan.
She stirs and I pull her closer, not liking the few inches her body moves from mine as she stretches her limbs.
"Good morning," she says.
"It's nearing dusk."
The room is cast in darkness from the blackout blinds. There is a small fire burning in the hearth. Because I like to watch the flicker of the flames dance on Cari’s skin.
"I slept the day away again. Am I ever going to see the sun with you?"
Not likely. If I can't go out into the sun, neither can she. I need to be by her to protect her at all times. Not only does she attract accidents, she has a proclivity to seek danger out. And there still is that matter of her brother trying to kill her.
"I'm sorry," she says. "Was that insensitive, since you can't, you know? Do you miss it?"
"The sun?"
"Yeah, you haven't seen it in like four hundred years."
I don't tell her that I've fought a losing battle with the sun's rays for two centuries. I don't want her to think I'm crazy. And I don't want to bring up my ex again. Not when I've become reacquainted with joy and happiness for the first time in centuries.
“Do you want to bite me?” she asks.
I give my head a shake. I run my tongue over my fangs. They are not out. “No.”
“Oh.”
Is that disappointment I hear in her tone? “Do you want me to bite you?”
“I just figured you’d want to, or need to. But I suppose you have those blood bags.”
I chuckle as I nuzzle her neck, right over the jugular. “Trust me, a blood bag is no substitute for your taste.”
She jerks away. Her hand comes to her neck. “You’ve bitten me?”
“Only a sip.”
She runs her fingers over both sides of her neck and her collarbone and comes up empty. “Where?”
I trace my hand from her breast, over her belly. She gasps when I nudge her thighs apart. I feel for the raised marks at the crease of her thighs. Her lips form a rounded O.
“What do I taste like?” she asks.
My grin is slow. “Warm honey mixed with cinnamon.”
“Really?” Her eyes are bright as she preens. “You tasted spicy.”
I chuckle at her description. I’ve never shared my blood with anyone. And I never will. All that I am is for this woman.
“Do you need anymore?” she asks.
“I need all of you,” I say as I take her lips.
“Are you going to turn me?”
“No. Never. I told you, I will spend the rest of my life with you. When your life is over, I’m coming with you.”
“What if I want to be like you?” she asks.
I pull away from her, my face hardens. “You don’t. I won’t. I won’t turn you into a monster.”
Her hand comes to my cheek. “You’re not a monster.”
I close my eyes and turn my face into her hand. I do not want to have this conversation anymore. Thankfully, she seems to sense that and changes the subject.
She scoots away from me and heads towards the door leading to her closets. Her walk is sure, like she owns the place. Good. I want her to feel at home here since this is where she will reside from now on.
"Can you look at pictures and paintings of the sun?" she asks.
"Yes, of course."
She feels on the wall and finds the light switch. The closet fills with fluorescence. But she is my sun. Like a moth to a flame, I follow her.
"I'll take a picture when I'm out today,” she says. “The sunset over the Durand vineyard is the most beautiful. I want you to see it."
"Out?"
"I have to meet my brother and sister to sign some paperwork."
My first response is the hell you will. But I’ve matured, evolved. “I’ll come with you."
"The meeting is at five. The sun won't be down yet. And you don't have to come.”
She slips on another sundress, white this time. All of her wounds are healed. Her skin is perfect against the color of innocence, an innocence that I’ve claimed as my own.
"Tell them to change the time,” I say.
Her back straightens as she buttons up the dress. But not in the sexy way of a submissive who has been put in her place. It’s in the way of a fierce woman who has her hackles up. I brace myself for a fight that she will lose. But her gaze softens and her hand cups my chin. Now I am putty in her hands.
"This is about last night,” she says. “The accident?"
How can I tell her it's about her whole life and that I need her to spend every moment of it with me as her protector, her pleasurer?
"It's just down the road. There isn't much traffic. If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll call my brother to pick me up. He's an excellent driver. He's never had so much as a fender bender."
“The hell you will,” I growl. “Over my dead body will he come near you."
Her hand jerks away as if I'd burned her. "You still think he's tried to hurt me? Hadrian, that's ridiculous. Arneis loves me. He helped raise me.”
"He's behind the raid of the club. And then we find ourselves run off the road and wrapped around a tree not long after."
"That was an accident."
She steps around me and heads back for the bedroom. The fire is dying. Carignan disappears into the darkness. But I see her just fine.
"Accidents and mishaps follow you. You're not leaving my sight."
"You don't own me, Hadrian,” she says as she steps into a pair of flats.
"Perhaps you forgot our earlier conversation. You are mine."
"Sure.” She comes to stand toe to toe with me. “Here in the bedroom. It's sexy here. It's not cute in any other room. And I'm leaving this room."
She takes a step to the door that leads out into the backyard, but I am on her in less than a second. She balls her hand
s into fists and puffs out her cheeks. It would be adorable under different circumstances.
"Hadrian, move out of my way."
"No. I can't."
Her entire body deflates. Her cheeks hollow. Her fingers hang limp at her sides. “Don't make me choose between you and my family."
The stake is back at the crash site. Yet somehow it pierces my chest all the way through. Why was I never enough? Domitia had always needed other lovers. And now Cari wants to run to her family instead of staying with me.
"I love you,” she says. Her tone is a plea. It feels like a knife twisting in my heart.
Yes, this is familiar. The pain of love. The sharp needles in my chest. The inability to take a full breath.
"But you can't hold me captive."
If you live long enough, history will repeat itself. Cari's words are Domitia's last words to me down to the last syllable.
There was nothing I could do to hold onto Domitia. She made the decision to walk into the sun.
Cari doesn’t go to the exit that leads to the hall. She goes to the exit from the first time she came into this room. The one that leads outside to the sun.
“Step back,” she says.
I stand still. I can’t move. My limbs no longer work. My heart stops beating.
“Hadrian, I don’t want to hurt you.”
She can’t hurt me. Not when she’s killed me. She’s chosen others over me. Her hand on the door knob confirms it.
"I'll call you later and we'll talk."
She pulls the door open, but only a fraction. The sun is low, nearly swallowed up by the mountains. Still, a soft ray of sunlight breaks into the darkness breaching my safe place. Cari steps through the crack of the door. I am powerless to stop her. For the second time in my life, I watch as the woman I love walks into the rays.
Chapter 30
Cari
I'm not sure if I’m happy or disappointed that Hadrian doesn't follow me out of the bedroom. I suppose he can't since the setting sun shines its muted light on my face.
But he doesn't shout after me either. He doesn't call my name. He doesn't move.
Part of me is worried I really hurt him by leaving. But this is not how I am going to live my life. He can own my heart, he can be the master of my body, but he can't control me. I’ve finally taken the reins of my life back from fate and I’m captaining this ship. He’ll have to get used to that.
We can talk it out later tonight when I’m done with family business. Because that's what I do now. I talk my problems out instead of jumping out of an airplane to deal with them.
See, grown.
I’m standing at the end of the drive when Arneis pulls up less than ten minutes after I call him. He does not look pleased as I climb into the passenger seat of his sensible town car. I pull the seatbelt strap over my torso and buckle up like a responsible adult.
See, grown.
"Really, Cari?" Arneis starts right in. For most of my life, he hasn’t had to pull the big brother-bad cop card. Because I’ve been a saint.
Up until last year.
But my brother isn’t tugging me out of a club at four in the morning… because he missed me at Club Toxic. Well, he’s not tugging me out of a plane or scooping me from a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean. I’m just leaving my boyfriend’s house after a night of passion… and a couple of near death experiences.
“How long have you known this guy?”
"Two?” I rewind the clock in my head. “No, three days."
"You were raised better than this, to sleep around with a man, and a man like that.”
My foot presses into the floor of the car, as if I can hit the brakes. "A man like what, Arneis?”
Arneis purses his lips, like he’s trying to hold something in. But he’s never been good at keeping secrets or keeping silent. ”Do you know the type of people he's associated with? The lowest of creatures."
"Like Lucius Frangelico at Club Toxic?"
Arneis' jaw tenses. I can hear him grinding his molars. His fingers are white as they grip the steering wheel. His lips purse once more, but this time he holds his tongue.
"Did you have anything to do with the raid last night?” I ask.
"What do you know about that?"
I try to swallow the lump in my throat before I go on. But the obstruction is cold, thick, and somehow it burns.
"I was there,” I manage to say. “It was you, wasn't it?"
Oh god. Could Hadrian have been right? Could my brother be trying to kill me?
"You don't understand," says Arneis.
He pulls over to the side of the road. The sun has nearly set. In just a few moments it will be dark.
My world is upside down as I look at my big brother. Arneis taught me to ride a bike. He drove me and my friends to the mall in middle school. He came to every one of my high school soccer games even though I sat on the bench for over half of the games.
"There were a lot of debts with the vineyard. Dad owed people, not all of them nice. I've been doing my best to pay for things so you and Mare wouldn't know. The only way to keep it all going was to start the political bribes again. I didn't want to. But I had no choice until we sold the vineyard. Then I'd be able to clear all the debt."
My brain is so preoccupied with redrawing the past with my brother as a villain that I don’t hear the words that exonerate him. It takes me a moment to replay his confession. When I do, I see that there is a threat. But it’s not to me.
"So you extorted people like Frangelico?" I ask.
Shame shines through Arneis’ eyes. It’s easy to identify because I know it so well.
Here I thought I was the only one suffering after Papa’s death. But Mare was struggling alone in the vineyard. And now I learn Arneis has been struggling over the books. Meanwhile, I’ve been playing fast and loose with my life.
"I never thought I'd be that kind of politician, that kind of man. But these are bad people. I'm not going to seek reelection, if this is what I have to do. I'll come back to the vineyard. We'll make it work. Papa would've wanted it that way."
I sigh. I didn't realize I’ve been holding my breath. "You had nothing to do with the failed parachute or the cut harness or last night's accident."
"What are you talking about?” He looks me over. “You were in an accident?"
"I'm fine. Everything's fine. Could you drive me back to Hadrian's? I just need to tell him something real quick.”
Arneis glances at his watch. ”We'll be late and…”
I don’t hear anything else he says. A dark figure appears in front of the car out of nowhere. It’s a woman. She has the palest skin and whitest hair. Her whiteness is stark in the dusk of night. She smiles and that's when I see the fangs.
Chapter 31
Hadrian
The invaders have retreated beyond the horizon. I remain holed up inside. My boundaries have been breached. My defenses are down. The scene inside the walls of what was once my safe haven is that of a massacre as the white sheet from the bed slips onto the floor; a sign of surrender.
Darkness steals into the room. Not the dark of night. This is an empty darkness, devoid of moonlight, devoid of any essence. I know then that I must still retain my soul because my entire being feels plunged into a murky depth.
Cari is gone and I am hollow. A shell.
This is nothing like what I felt when Domitia died. That devastation was a stroll on a deserted highway. This feels as though I’ve been tossed over and into a raging sea during a hurricane.
I lost the power in my legs long ago. My bare ass sits on the cold floor. My head hangs down. My gaze remains fastened to my empty hands.
But only for a second.
Suddenly my hands are filled with wood and plaster. Blood trickles from my nail beds down my wrists. I look up to see that the wall in my bedroom now has a gaping hole in it, one the size of the hollow space in my chest now that she is gone.
I'm not sure when, but soon I’m no longer alone. The compan
y to my misery is not welcome. I neither say nor do anything to usher it away.
"I heard doors opening before dusk settled,” says Gaius. He is sat beside me. Where his legs are covered in fine silk, mine are bare. His hands are clasped together in his lap, as though he plans to sit for a long while. “For a moment I assumed it was you on your daily rampage with the morning star. But with the new love in your life, I doubted you were still facing off against the sun."
I don't answer. I stare into the darkness. I can see everything, but I focus on nothing.
"She didn't slam doors as she left,” Gaius continues. “Normally I would take that as a good sign when a woman leaves my bed. But then I come to find you here, butt ass naked on the floor, sitting in front of your patio door.”
I lift my head, but not to look at Gaius. I bang it once, twice, three times against the wall. When I let my head come to rest there is a hole in the wall that cradles me.
Gaius nods his head as though that is my answer to the question he still hasn’t asked. He still doesn’t ask. He continues to deduce.
“For the brief moment that I met her, Cari didn't seem to me the theatrical sort. I didn’t get the impression that she was emotionally abusive and would manipulate you like Domitia."
"Manipulate me?" I turn my head to face Gaius.
The male’s robe is open and his chest is revealed. Over his left pec is an embroidered cross with a sword and a reef; a symbol of the Spanish Inquisition. I have the same marking, as does Viri. We are three males who have been dealt more than our fair share of misery in this world. No matter how much we try to turn our lives around and move away from pain, it always seems to follow us.
"Domitia slammed doors,” says Gaius. “She broke furniture and dishes when you didn't give her her way. And sometimes even when you did. She liked the drama. She reveled in the pain. Your pain especially, because you were her shining knight.”
Now I turn my body to face my friend. There was never any love between Domitia and Gaius. She liked his cock. He was her sired. Behind closed doors, Gaius always made it plain to me that there were no tender feelings for the woman I loved. Only devotion and gratitude for the new life she’d given him. But he never disparaged her.