by Abby Green
Feeling scared but knowing it was important, she asked, ‘What if I want to discuss it?’
Sebastian avoided her eye. ‘Please, Aneesa, don’t push me on this.’
Before she could ask any more questions or her far-too-perceptive eyes could see the effect that looking at the picture of his baby was having on him, Sebastian handed her back the printout, got up abruptly from the bed and muttered something about running a bath for her.
He escaped to the bathroom, feeling like an utter coward. But the truth was that his entire world felt like it had just tilted sideways. Her questions had cut far too close to the bone, especially now that he knew his brother Jacob was seemingly intent on getting everyone together. And the knowledge hit again; that grainy image he’d just held in his hand was his son or daughter … And for the first time it wasn’t the dreaded fear that threatened to overwhelm him but something that felt suspiciously like joy.
To his relief, after she’d had her bath, Aneesa seemed content to drop the questions. Sebastian didn’t attempt to make love to her, even though his body screamed for it. And even though he felt a disturbingly primal need to brand her in some way—the aftermath of the terror he’d felt earlier was still in his system—but he controlled his urge. She was lying on her side, tucked into his body, his arms wrapped around her. He felt raw, like a layer of skin had been ripped away. Her breaths were deep and even and he told himself he’d get up and leave in a minute, but he couldn’t stop his eyes from closing and the elusive tentacles of sleep bind around him.
The only way Sebastian knew he’d been having that dream again was because he was struggling for breath and something or someone was holding him down. He fought to get free and lurched off the bed, only realising then where he was.
Aneesa was looking at him with huge eyes, her hair tousled around her shoulders. ‘You were having a dream … crying out for someone to come to you….’
On jelly legs Sebastian walked over to the window. His heart was still hammering and his skin felt clammy. He spoke because something within him couldn’t remain silent. He’d bottled this up forever.
‘I was calling for my mother.’
‘Yes,’ Aneesa said quietly.
He was still half conscious and recounted the dream almost without realising he was doing it. ‘I’m in my home where I grew up, Wolfe Manor, and I’m tiny. I’m in a dark corridor all alone, and I know something terrible has happened. I’m frightened and crying but no one comes and then suddenly there are lots of people—my half-brothers and -sister, our housekeeper … my father. But they can’t see me and they keep rushing past me, even though I’m crying.’
Sebastian knew Aneesa had moved to sit on the edge of the bed. Silently he begged her not to come near him or he might crumble completely.
‘Sebastian it was just a dream …’ Aneesa’s heart went out to the tall proud man who stood with his back to her.
He turned around then and she was shocked at the bleak look on his face. ‘That’s it, you see. It’s not just a dream. It’s a memory. When I was just over a year old, my mother walked into the lake on our estate and tried to kill herself and my brother Nathaniel. He was just a baby at the time, but my father was enraged because she’d been stupid enough to have another child. It was only because two of my older brothers saw her and saved them that they survived.’
Aneesa sucked in a breath. ‘That’s horrific …’ He smiled but it was grim. ‘Yes. And there’s plenty more where that came from, like the fact that my oldest brother Jacob had a row with our father which resulted in his death.’ Aneesa tried to speak. ‘Sebastian—’ He made a slashing gesture with his hand. ‘No. I won’t discuss this anymore. You need to get back to sleep. I’m sorry for disturbing you.’
And he strode out of the bedroom. Aneesa just sat there for a long moment before curling back into bed, hugging her arms around herself. She didn’t want to be alone tonight—she still felt vulnerable after what had happened earlier—but she knew there was no way Sebastian would come back now. She’d just pushed him to his limit.
CHAPTER SIX
WHEN Aneesa woke the next morning and went to get some breakfast, she wasn’t surprised to see that Sebastian had already gone to the office. Daniel passed on a message to say that Sebastian would be working late, so not to wait up. Aneesa sighed deeply. They’d gone about five steps forward and three hundred back. All night she’d had broken and disturbed dreams about a small boy standing distraught in a dark corridor while people rushed past, ignoring him.
Great, she thought to herself as she poured some tea, now I’m even taking on his nightmares. But there had been something so sadly poignant about the image … and even now she silently vowed to protect her own child from any similar scenario.
After breakfast she went into Sebastian’s study which he told her she could use to make calls home or for the Internet. Feeling determined, she sat there for hours and trawled the Internet for every bit of information she could find about the Wolfe family. She managed to find out a lot more this time and it was only when Daniel knocked and called her for supper that she realised how engrossed she’d become.
Her head spun with information she’d found, but she’d ended up with nearly more questions than answers. By all accounts, William Wolfe, Sebastian’s father, had been a charismatic and upstanding man of society. A vastly wealthy and enigmatic character, he’d had seven children, and a rumoured illegitimate son, the famous Brazilian entrepreneur Rafael da Souza. He’d clearly been a lover of women, with three marriages and at least a couple of love affairs to his credit. And yet all of his relationships seemed to have ended in tragedy, or mysterious circumstances. And exactly as Sebastian had said, he’d died by the hand of his own eldest son, although this tragedy had been ruled accidental.
There’d been one mention of Carrie Hartington, Nathaniel and Sebastian’s mother, to say that she’d been committed to psychiatric care twenty-five years before, and nothing about where she was now. Aneesa could only guess, after what Sebastian had revealed, that perhaps his mother had had some sort of severe postnatal depression, because surely her own husband couldn’t have driven her to such a situation?
All in all, as she dropped exhausted into bed that evening, Aneesa knew that the real story of Sebastian’s past lay between the lines of everything she’d read today, and she also knew that he would have to be the one to tell her. She woke up a couple of hours later when she felt Sebastian slide into the bed behind her, his naked body tucking around hers. On a wave of relief that he’d come to her, she silently turned to face him and took his face in her hands, kissing him on his mouth.
Her nightdress was discarded in a matter of seconds and Aneesa said nothing as she and Sebastian made love. Afterwards, when he tried to pull away to leave, she gripped his arms around her and said determinedly, ‘No. Stay till I fall asleep.’
She could sense his struggle but finally he gave in, and for the first time, Aneesa lay awake while Sebastian slept. She prayed he wouldn’t have the dream again, and finally fell into a dreamless sleep herself.
When she woke the next morning alone in the bed, Aneesa had to wonder for a moment if she’d dreamt that Sebastian had come to her the previous night, but then her naked and pleasantly aching body told her the truth.
Without even getting out of bed, she instinctively knew that Sebastian would be gone to work already and a small fire of anger and determination lit in her blood. She was not going to let him treat her as if she existed purely to keep his bed warm, and not even as a human being he could communicate with. She was carrying his child—she deserved better than that, no matter what secrets his past held.
Sebastian felt disgruntled and irritated. Ever since the horrific realisation that Aneesa had witnessed his most vulnerable moment, when he’d blurted out his dream, he’d been determined to do his best to mark out his territory again. Reclaim his sanity.
He’d gone into the office yesterday and had instructed his assistant to find apartm
ents for sale or rent. He was going to move Aneesa out, or he’d move out if he had to. She could have the apartment and Daniel. He couldn’t stay there any longer. With her. With those huge eyes watching his every move, silently questioning him.
So last night he’d come home, with arms full of brochures for houses, determined to lay them all out and offer them up to Aneesa. He would set her up in style, so that she and his baby would never have to want for anything. He’d do the same in Mumbai if she so wished so he could keep them at arm’s length and get on with his life.
And he would be calling a halt to the physical side of their relationship; it wasn’t fair to keep sleeping with her when he had no intention of making her a permanent fixture in his life. He couldn’t shake his visceral deep-rooted fears and simply could not envisage a future as a happy family.
But then … he’d come into her room where she lay sleeping and a force greater than he could resist had made him shed his clothes and climb into bed with her. He’d had to touch her. And then she’d turned to him and kissed him so sweetly and he’d been lost … and worst of all, afterwards he’d slept, until dawn had been breaking outside. His main feeling on waking up had been relief that he’d not had the dream again and his arms and hands had been full of soft, curvaceous and warm woman. One hand had rested across her belly, as if even in sleep it had gone there to protect the child within.
That soft yet hard swell had made a light sweat break out on his brow, but even so, the prospect of sending her away from him in that moment had sent panic through his system. So once again, with his head thumping with a mass of contradictions, he’d left so that he could avoid seeing her wake, seeing those eyes widen and the inevitable questions form.
That morning Daniel had gone out to do some shopping and Aneesa had declined to join him, still a little nervous of going outside, even though Daniel had informed her that Sebastian had two bodyguards standing by. Somehow Aneesa had known that the only person she would feel safe with was Sebastian.
So when she was passing the study and she heard the phone ring, she went in to answer it, her heart tripping to think it might be him. But it wasn’t. It was another voice which sounded eerily familiar, deep and authoritative. When he asked for Sebastian and she said he was at work, the man sighed deeply and then said, ‘Is this Aneesa Adani?’
‘Yes …’ she replied warily. ‘Who is this, please?’
A long silence and then, ‘It’s Jacob Wolfe, Sebastian’s brother.’
‘Oh.’ Immediately Aneesa thought of the fact that this man had been responsible for his father’s death.
‘“Oh” is right,’ came the wry response. ‘Sebastian hasn’t responded to Nathaniel’s wedding invitation. Do you know that our brother is getting married this weekend?’
‘Yes …’ Aneesa said, her head buzzing with questions. ‘I’d heard … read about it in the paper. But I don’t think Sebastian intends to go.’
‘Somehow I’m not surprised.’ Another silence fell and then Jacob said, ‘Speaking of the papers, I saw you with my brother.’
Aneesa frowned. ‘What do you mean?’ And then she went paler and paler as Jacob described how pictures of Sebastian carrying her to safety from the mob on Bethnal Green had been tabloid front-page news for the past couple of days. She closed her eyes; she could just imagine the lurid headlines.
‘Do you mind me asking—is it true? Are you having a baby with my brother?’
Miserably Aneesa figured it wouldn’t have taken long for the hacks to get that information from the
Indian papers and answered, ‘Yes.’ She hadn’t even told her parents who the father was yet.
‘Well, then, you must come to the wedding, even if Sebastian won’t. You’re part of the family now, and everyone would love to meet you.’
Aneesa gripped the phone cord tighter. Here was a chance to get to know more about Sebastian’s past. Jacob was right; she was part of this family now whether Sebastian liked it or not.
‘OK …’ she said huskily, ‘I’d like that very much.’
Jacob became brisker. ‘Good, we’ll see you at the weekend, then, and tell Sebastian I called.’
It was only when Aneesa put down the phone that some instinct made her pull open the top drawer nearest to her on the desk, and inside she saw it—the invitation to Nathaniel’s wedding, torn neatly in half. The fact that he hadn’t destroyed it completely sent a flicker of hope through her. She picked the two halves out and, with a sense of determination, found some sticky tape and stuck them together again.
And then when she was on the way out of the study, her head still spinning, she spotted them. Sitting on the edge of the desk. A pile of glossy brochures, all detailing luxury one- and two-bedroom apartments for sale or rent just nearby Sebastian’s apartment. And worse … luxury apartments in Mumbai.
Hurt lanced Aneesa so badly that she had to suck in a breath. And then she heard a door slam, long strides coming towards the study. The door was flung open and Sebastian stood there, resplendent in a dark suit. Every inch the successful and powerful titan of industry.
He frowned. ‘What’s wrong?’ And Aneesa knew she must look pale. She shook her head and bought time to recover.
‘What are you doing home?’ She cursed her tongue, as if this was home.
Carefully now Sebastian said, ‘I forgot a document I need for a meeting.’
Aneesa held the patched-up wedding invitation high in one shaky hand and said, ‘Was it this?’
And then with the other hand she held up the sheaf of glossy brochures. ‘Or perhaps it was these?’ She glanced at them, and back to Sebastian. ‘I haven’t had the chance to look through them properly yet but perhaps a penthouse apartment isn’t the most practical place for me to live once the baby gets here.’
CHAPTER SEVEN
INARTICULATE rage boiled upwards within Sebastian. ‘How dare you go through my personal things!’
Aneesa stood before him, pale and intensely vulnerable-looking but with an unmistakably determined glint in her eyes. Her chin came up. ‘I dare because as your own brother just told me, I’m a part of your family now and will be for a long time to come, thanks to our baby.
‘Tell me,’ she asked conversationally, colour returning to her cheeks, ‘was last night just a quickie before you asked me to move out, or were you planning on taking your fill before my body becomes too rounded and repulsive to you?’
‘Stop it,’ Sebastian said curtly, the thought of her body growing more rounded having the complete opposite effect on his body. And before she could say anything else he asked, ‘What did you mean about my brother?’
Aneesa leaned back against the desk, still holding the wedding invitation and the brochures. ‘Jacob just called. He wants to know why he hasn’t been able to get in touch with you and if you’re coming to Nathaniel’s wedding.’
Acute pain lanced Sebastian to hear that name. ‘I’ve already told you I’m not going and it’s none of his business.’ He put out an imperious hand. ‘Give me the invitation.’
Aneesa held it to her chest. ‘No. If you want it you can come and get it. And you could have got rid of it properly but you didn’t, so what does that say?’
Sebastian strode towards her then, fury all over his face, but Aneesa didn’t feel scared. He stopped a couple of feet away and she could see the agitation on his face, in his blue eyes. His hands were fists by his sides. Tension bounced off him in waves.
Aneesa stood strong. ‘I’m not giving you the invitation because it’s not yours anymore. It’s mine. Jacob has asked me to go and I’ve said yes.’
Sebastian’s jaw clenched. ‘You can’t go. You don’t even know them.’
Aneesa glared up at him. ‘I might not know them but apparently now that we’ve been splashed all over the papers, they want to get to know me. They, unlike you, seem to be coming to terms with the fact that I’m carrying a Wolfe heir a lot quicker than you!’
‘He saw the papers …’ It wasn’t a question
.
‘Yes. Why didn’t you tell me?’
Sebastian raked a hand through his hair, exasperation evident. ‘I didn’t want you to be upset by it.’
‘Perhaps you didn’t want me to get any notions of permanency? You’re forgetting that I’m not the one with the issues surrounding this pregnancy, you are.’
She looked at the brochures she held in her hand again and then stalked to Sebastian, pushing them into his chest where he had to catch them or let them fall. ‘And it’s apparent now that you’re going to do your damnedest to get rid of all the evidence—shut your inconvenient ex-one-night stand away with her even more inconvenient baby.’
She walked past him to the door and turned back. ‘I won’t go to a place of your choosing like some pregnant concubine, Sebastian. I’d prefer to take my chances and return to India rather than endure that. And whether you like it or not, I’m going to your brother’s wedding. I want my child to know his or her family.’
Aneesa was shaking by the time she reached her bedroom. Trembling all over. Standing up to Sebastian’s rigid stance had been a lot harder than she’d thought, and still that awful hurt lanced her, right through her belly, to think that he would want to shut her and the baby away like that. And yet what else had she expected? Despair gripped her.
She was sitting on the window seat and looking out at the view, not really seeing it, just waiting for the inevitable sound of the front door slamming as it heralded Sebastian’s return to work and away from her. But it didn’t come. And when a knock sounded on her door, her nerves were so tightly wound that she jumped.
She stood to see the door open and Sebastian standing there, his tie ripped off, jacket gone and shirt open. And he looked so damned gorgeous that every bone in her body wanted to melt. But she stood firm with arms crossed, fully prepared to tell him that she was going to return to India after the wedding if he was going to insist that she move out.