Her gaze shifted to the roofline, where one of Rafe’s crews was working diligently. Colt had been up there, too, until about an hour ago. It was in his nature to take risks, even if it was only walking along a roofline as if he were on a tightrope. He was so busy keeping busy that he couldn’t see what was right in front of him. The biggest adrenaline rush in the world. Love.
“Oh, this isn’t good, is it?”
Penny jerked out of her daydreams and shifted her gaze to Maria as she picked her way across the yard. She wore a black skirt and a red blazer over a white silk blouse, and her three-inch heels kept sinking into the grass as she walked.
“Hi. What did you say?”
“I said, this doesn’t look good.” She squinted up at the crew on the roof, getting ready to spread a striped tent over the house. “Termites?”
“Only a few bazillion.”
Maria shook her head and said, “If they’re tenting, why’re you still here? Shouldn’t you be at Colt’s place?”
“We will be, this afternoon,” Penny said on a sigh. She wasn’t looking forward to it, but she didn’t have much choice, either. At the moment, Colt had a team of people inside the cottage, preparing for the termite extermination. But once the tent was up and the gas pumped in, she and the kids wouldn’t be able to get back inside for at least forty-eight hours. Which meant either she try to keep the twins happy locked up in a motel room...or, she did what Colt was insisting on. Move in at his place for the duration.
It was hard enough having him here at her house. What was it going to be like staying with him? Heck, she’d never even seen the place Colt called home. Was it a palace? A condo? A plush penthouse apartment? He hadn’t eased her curiosity, either, he’d just said, “You’ll see when we get there.”
“You sound thrilled at the prospect,” Maria said, stepping out of her heels to take a seat on the blanket. Automatically, she swept Reid up onto her lap where the baby boy chortled happily and busied himself with the gold chain Maria wore around her neck.
“Well, it’s weird,” Penny tried to explain. “Moving into his house is completely different than having him here.”
Maria nodded sagely. “The home turf advantage you mean.”
“Exactly!” Penny smiled, pulled blades of grass from Riley’s hand and added, “I don’t want to owe him any more, you know?”
“I’m sorry,” Maria said, shaking her head. “I must have gone momentarily deaf. You owe him? You already gave him two kids. How much more could the bill be?”
Penny laughed in spite of the situation. Maria was not only Robert’s fiancée, but a really good friend. And right now, Penny needed one. “Maria, he paid off my bills. He stuck his nose in and used his money to ‘straighten out my life.’”
“Good for him.”
“What? Aren’t you on my side?”
“Absolutely. But why shouldn’t he pay off your bills? Honestly, Penny, pride’s a great thing. But I’d rather have electricity than sit in the dark telling myself over and over again how proud I am.”
“Some help you are.”
“Hey, I’m a lawyer. We’re soulless, remember?”
Penny laughed again. “I keep forgetting that part. And how did you know I’d be here?”
“Colt told me.”
“Told you? When did you see him?”
Maria pulled the gold chain out of Reid’s mouth and said, “At the hospital. I was supposed to meet Robert for lunch today but when I got there, he and Colt were just heading to the cafeteria.”
“What? Why?” Colt went to see her brother? Without bothering to mention it to her? What was going on? What was he up to now? There was just no telling. Nothing was sacred to Colt. He’d invaded every aspect of her life and there was no sign of his stopping.
Maria shrugged, and kissed the top of Reid’s head. “I don’t know. Rob just said he’d see me at home later. But they looked...serious.”
“Great.” Now she could worry about what her brother and her— Wait. Just what was Colt to her? Her ex? Sure, but there was more. Her baby daddy? Yep, that, too. Her lover? Everything inside her curled up into a ball and whimpered at the thought. One night with Colt had her dreaming of more nights with Colt and that was just piling mistakes on mistakes and she knew it.
Didn’t stop the wanting, though. Didn’t stop the wishing or the misery that accompanied the knowledge that wishes very rarely came true.
“God. You’re still in love with him, aren’t you?”
Penny’s gaze snapped to Maria’s and she felt a flush fill her cheeks. “Of course not. That would be completely stupid.”
Maria lifted one eyebrow and gave Penny her best lawyer glare.
“Okay, fine. Yes, you’re right.” Penny pulled the hem of her T-shirt from Riley’s mouth. “I still love him since apparently I don’t learn from my own mistakes.”
“And what’re you going to do about it?”
“Suffer,” Penny muttered. “I’m going to watch him walk away. Again. And then I’m going to ask Robert if they’ve got an anti-love virus inoculation.”
Maria laughed. “Pitiful. Really.”
“Easy for you to say,” Penny whispered. “Robert’s crazy about you.”
“I know.” Maria sighed happily. “I really love that about him. But as for you—why are you so willing to let him walk away again?”
“What am I supposed to do?” Penny asked. “Tie him to the bed?”
“Not an entirely bad idea.”
“True. But eventually, he’d work his way free and then he’d leave anyway.” She plucked a rock from Riley’s fingers and tossed it into the closest flower bed. “Besides, if he’s that anxious to get away from me and his children, why should I try to make him stay?”
“Love.”
“One-sided love? Not a good time.”
“You could fight for him,” Maria suggested.
“No.” Shaking her head, Penny said, “What would be the point? If I fight and lose, none of it mattered.”
“And if you fight and win?”
“I still lose,” Penny told her solemnly. “It’s no use, Maria. Colt lives for risk. He likes the rush. He likes the danger. I have a feeling that he’s not going to be satisfied until he’s cheated death so often that he finally catches up to it.” She shivered at the thought, then looked at her babies and shook her head again. “I won’t watch him do that, Maria. I won’t watch him chase death. I can’t. And I won’t let my kids watch it, either.”
A Spanish language radio station blared music into the quiet neighborhood. The men on the roof spreading a green-striped tarp shouted to one another and laughed while they worked.
“So that’s it?” Maria watched her. “It’s just over now?”
Penny smoothed her palm over Riley’s head, loving the feel of her soft curls. “No. It’s not over now. It was over almost two years ago. It was over right after it began.”
* * *
The hospital cafeteria wasn’t exactly filled with ambiance. But they’d done what they could with the place. Dozens of tables and chairs dotted the gleaming linoleum floor. Windows on the walls allowed bright shafts of daylight into the room and there was a patio through a set of French doors that boasted dappled shade and neatly tended flower beds.
Still, not a place Colt would have chosen to have a lunch meeting. But when you were meeting a busy doctor with limited time, it served its purpose.
Colt looked at the man opposite him. “You did the right thing telling me about the twins.”
Robert took a bite of his chicken sandwich, chewed and said, “You had a right to know. But more importantly,” he added, waving his sandwich for emphasis, “Penny’s been struggling long enough on her own.”
“Yeah, she has.” Irritation swelled. Remembering what he’d d
iscovered when he went through her bills, her business records, Colt felt another sharp stab of guilt. Though why the hell he should feel guilty, he didn’t know. He hadn’t known about the twins, had he? No one had told him a damn thing. Not until Robert had come to him.
Disgusted, Colt took a bite of his chicken enchilada. Immediately sorry he had, Colt frowned, dropped his fork onto the bright orange food tray and reluctantly swallowed. “How can you eat this stuff?”
Robert shrugged and took another healthy bite. “It’s here. I’m hungry. Case closed.”
Okay, he could see that. One glance around the crowded cafeteria assured him that the hospital had a captive audience here. Most of the customers were nurses and doctors, with a handful of civilians thrown in just for good measure.
“So,” Robert said as he dipped a spoon into a bowl of vegetable soup, “I’ve only got a half hour for lunch. What did you want to talk about?”
“Right.” Colt nodded, pushed his food tray to one side and folded his arms on the table in front of him. “I understand family loyalty,” he began. “So I get why you kept quiet for so long. And I know what it cost you to go against Penny’s wishes to tell me the truth.”
Robert sat back and pushed one hand through his hair. “It wasn’t easy. Penny and I’ve been through a lot together. She’s always been there for me and I owe her everything. But I was tired of watching her live hand to mouth.”
There was something more that Robert wasn’t saying. It was there in the man’s eyes. He owed his sister everything? Why? What had he and Penny been through together?
“I’m not saying anything else that would betray her confidence,” Robert told him. “If you want more answers, you’ll have to ask her yourself. Telling you about the twins was different. You’re their father. You had a right to know.”
“Yeah, I did.” Colt nodded tightly. He didn’t like knowing that Penny had felt she couldn’t come to him. Didn’t like thinking about her having such a hard time. Worrying. Alone with the responsibility of raising two children.
Scrubbing one hand across the back of his neck, he pushed those thoughts aside. “Look, I came here to tell you that I’ll continue to be a part of the twins’ lives.”
Surprise flickered across Robert’s features. “Is that right? So, you’re staying?”
“No,” he said, the word blurting from him instinctively.
Hell, he hadn’t even had to think about it. He didn’t stay. Colt didn’t do permanent. He always had one foot out the door because it was safer that way. Not just for him but for whoever was in his life.
“I won’t be staying, but I’ll be around and I’ll keep in touch,” Colt said flatly. “And I will see to it that your sister doesn’t have to worry about money anymore.”
“Uh-huh. Good to know.” Robert reached for his coffee and took a long sip. “So what’re you going to do about the fact that she’s still in love with you?”
Colt just glared at the other man. He wasn’t even going to address that statement. Mainly because he didn’t know how to address it. He’d been avoiding even thinking about it because there was no easy answer. He knew damn well that Penny loved him. It was in her eyes every time she looked at him. And it was just another reason for him to get the hell out of her life before it was too late.
He didn’t want Penny to count on him. He didn’t want his kids depending on him. He’d already failed people who mattered and the aftereffects of that had nearly killed him. Ten years later, he was still paying for what he’d done. His dreams were still haunted by the memories that wouldn’t fade. By the screams. By the thunderous roar of an avalanche and the aching wail of ambulances that were just too late.
He wouldn’t chance all of that happening again. But he also wasn’t going to discuss any of this with Penny’s brother.
“That’s none of your business,” he said.
“Probably,” Robert agreed. “But she’s my sister.”
“I get that. Family loyalty is important.” Colt knew that better than most. And no matter what happened or didn’t happen between him and Penny, she and the twins would always be his family. He would see that they were well taken care of. Have everything they needed. In fact, he would do anything for them.
Except stay.
* * *
Colt’s house was amazing.
It sat on the tip of the bluff in Dana Point, and boasted views of the Pacific from every room in the house. Three stories of living space sprawled across the cliff side, with decks and patios jutting out at every angle. There was a grassy, tree-laden space on either side of the house, with plexiglass fences to keep people safe while still allowing for the view.
It was lush and elegant yet somehow managed to feel cozy. There were ten bedrooms, seven bathrooms and a kitchen that would bring professional chefs to tears. Everything about the place, from the architecture to its perch overlooking the ocean, was breathtaking. Yet it felt...lonely. As if it were a model home waiting to be chosen by a family. Waiting to be lived in.
“So,” Colt asked when he joined her on the stone terrace. “What do you think?”
“It’s beautiful,” she said automatically, then shifted her gaze to the wide sweep of ocean stretching out in front of her. Sailboats skimmed the surface of the water, breakers churned into the shore below the house, and a handful of surfers bobbed up and down with the rhythm of the waves. “How long have you lived here?”
He leaned one hip casually against the stone railing and flicked a glance at the sea. “A few years. It’s a good base for me. I like being near the ocean.”
“A base,” she repeated. “So, you’re not here often.”
“Nope.” He straightened up and shoved both hands into the pockets of his jeans.
“Your housekeeper must love working for you,” she murmured. “Nothing much to do really until you show up occasionally.”
He grinned and she had to force her heart back down from her throat to her chest where it belonged.
“I know she’s excited to have you and the twins here to take care of. It’s true I’m not here much, but you know me, Penny. I keep moving.”
Yes, she did know that, and it tore at her heart to admit it to herself. He was standing right beside her, tall and gorgeous, his black hair ruffled by the sea breeze, his ice-blue eyes narrowed against the sunlight, and he might as well have been in Sicily jumping off that dumb volcano. He was so far from her she felt that she would never be able to reach him.
Then she noticed that his jaw was so tight it was a wonder he didn’t grind his teeth into powder. That muscle flexing in his jaw was the only outward sign that he wasn’t as cool and detached as he would like her to believe.
He was on edge, too. And for some reason, that made her feel better. Good to know she wasn’t in an emotional turmoil on her own.
“You get the twins settled?”
“Yes,” she said with a warm smile. Remembering the nursery where she’d tucked the babies in sent shafts of tenderness for Colt dazzling through her. “I can’t believe you managed to have an entire room done up for them in a few hours.”
“Money can accomplish a lot of things very quickly.”
Her smile deepened. He might pretend to be unmoved, even isolated, but what he’d done for his children disproved that lie. The twins’ nursery here was almost an exact duplicate of their room at the cottage. Bigger, of course, with a staggering view of the ocean. But the cribs were identical, the night-light was the same, their toys and dressers, right down to stacks of new clothes and towers of diapers. All sitting there waiting for the twins to make use of them.
“Yes, your money paid for it, Colt,” she said. “But it wasn’t your bank account that chose the twin teddy bears or saw to it that a guardrail was installed across the window.”
He frowned a little.
“That was you, Colt. You were thinking about the twins. About their safety. Their happiness.”
“And that surprises you?” he asked.
“No,” she said, moving closer to him, tipping her head to one side to study him. “But I think it surprised you. You love them. You love your children and want the best for them.”
His frown deepened a bit and he looked...uneasy.
“Don’t make more of this than there is, Penny,” he warned. “Of course I care about the twins. But this situation with us is temporary and you know it. Soon I’ll be leaving again and—”
She didn’t want to think about that. Not now. Not until she had to. Penny had been so busy trying to maintain her anger at him that letting it go now was enough to unleash the barely restrained passion she felt for this man. She knew he’d be leaving. She knew that what they had together wasn’t enough to hold him. But though they didn’t have a future, they did have a present. If she was bold enough to demand it.
Memories of their night together rushed into her mind and sent dizzying spirals of want and need spinning through her body. She wanted Colt King any way she could have him. And if that meant that she would later pay with pain, then she was prepared to meet the cost. What she wasn’t prepared to do was waste any more time with him.
“I know.”
She stopped him by laying her fingers across his mouth. She was going to lose him and she knew it. She couldn’t fight his nature. She couldn’t offer him the risk and the danger he seemed to crave. So instead she would accept him as he was and leave the worrying about how she would live without him for later.
“Penny...”
“The twins are napping,” she said, moving in even closer, until her breasts were pressed to his chest. Until she had to tip her head back to meet the ice-blue eyes that were now burning with the kind of passion she’d only known with Colton King. “Your housekeeper is out at the store stocking your kitchen. We have the house to ourselves, Colt. Let’s not waste it.”
DOUBLE THE TROUBLE Page 12