Helena holds onto me tighter, reminding me her quietness is comforting enough.
“You would have met somebody else,” Giulio continues with a low, strenuous voice. “Somebody who doesn’t have any lies attached. Somebody who isn’t so fucked up that he can’t keep his marriage together. Somebody who you can have children with without the fear of losing them. He would have told you all the right things, and made you smile every single day. Because in the end, I failed as a husband. I failed as a man. I failed as your best friend. All I ever wanted was to live the rest of my life with and for you. I wanted to make you happy, but look at us, look at what we have become. What happened to us? Fuck. You deserve a man better than me, but just know that through it all, I never once regretted the way I feel about you. Alongside our children, I will never love somebody the way I love you. I will forever be sorry for everything I’ve done. I’m sorry my actions have caused our marriage to fade. I’m sorry it took me so long to support you with hope for Addilyn and that my stupidity caused us to lose our three beautiful children. I’m sorry I turned out to be the weak man my father always told me I was.”
Police sirens ring in the distance. They’re close but not close enough to blur the resounding alarm in my head. My heart has never hurt this deep. I have never felt this lost in my life.
I have never wanted him more.
Giulio steps outside and my sister smiles sadly before I rush out behind him.
I never wanted this to happen.
I need to fix this.
I need him to know that everything he said is untrue before it’s too late.
The sirens intensify as Giulio sits on a porch step, head in hands with shaking shoulders. I don’t have to see his face to know he’s sobbing. His attempts to conceal it fail.
This is real life.
Right here.
With him.
The pain in my chest deepens when I gather myself and take a seat in the space beside him. My arms wrap around his torso and I hold him tightly to me. Giulio’s attempt to refuse my closeness by veering away doesn’t go unnoticed. “No. Please, don’t. Not when I’m like this, Valencia.”
I ignore his masculine resistance and listen to his broken, pained voice instead. I continue to embrace him, and this time he wraps his arms around me as well. We take refuge in each other. I am still confused about how I feel, but we’re miserable apart and so I concentrate on that for now.
“It’s okay, Giulio. You don’t need to hide from me. You never need to hide from me.”
His body goes limp against mine.
He allows me to hold him.
To touch him.
To be the strong one.
I hold him closer and one hand slides to the back of his head. My fingers weave through his smooth hair and I kiss it. It proves to be all he needs because he holds my waist, gives in to me, and nuzzles his head in my neck with tears rolling from his eyes to my skin.
“I have been unfair to you. I want you to know that none of this is your fault,” I whisper, swallowing the fire bellowing at the back of my throat. “I want you to know that you matter. You count. You are not weak. You are not a curse.”
“But I failed you, Lencia. I failed every single thing.”
“No, you didn’t. None of this is your fault and I’m sorry for blaming you. Yes, it was simpler for us once, but that’s life. That’s marriage. This is us perfecting our epilogue and we’re giving it our all. We’ll get through this because we always do. We’ll find our kids. You are their father. They are half of you. But…” I breathe in an extra breath. “You are all of me.”
Giulio pulls me closer. Even more desperately.
Tears overtake me at the thought of losing him. I don’t know what this means for us; if it’s the beginning or the end, but what I do know is that my healing through all of this has always been my family. Giulio and I have been fighting for the solution when it’s been right in front of us this entire time. Although I’m still shaken by what he did, I shouldn’t turn on him in tough times.
I’m learning to be me again.
I’m learning to ease my depression.
I’m learning to be strong and strength means never backing down from what you truly love, especially in times of hysteria, especially from those thorns.
The sirens are blaring. The police must be at the end of the street. I only have a brief moment before they arrive.
“I never want you to ever talk about death like that again. Ever. Your father was a toxic man and was wrong. You turned your life around. You are a fighter, Giulio Giannotti, and I will not allow you to stand down now. I share your last name and that makes me proud. You make me proud. So don’t give up, especially because of me. Never because of me. Without you, clients would never live the lives they deserve. Without you, this world would be a whole lot emptier.” I smile because the words run straight to my heart and put back all the strings in jumbled places. But at least they’re back. The order of each chamber can wait. “Giulio, without you my heart would not beat the same. The world needs you in it. I need you in it. What has happened to us is unimaginable and it will take me time to understand what is best for us now, but there’s nobody else I would want to go through this with but you and that’s why you matter.”
Passion blooms in his gaze, alongside that small smile in the midst of this fury. “Thank you. Those words bring me strength. I will give you all the time in the world. I promise, Lencia.”
Thank you for making me believe, Giulio.
I will never abandon him because that would only mean abandoning myself and our children. I haven’t come this far to crash and burn. I need Giulio just as much as he needs me. But I need to sort out my head first. I need to comprehend how witnessing a life end in front of me really makes me feel.
All the words I spoke were bound in truth. I want him to know it all. I’m his only family this very minute and I desperately need him to know just how important he is to me. By the pained smile on his face, I know he understands.
Giulio has always been there for me. He’s supported me. Rallied me on. Gave me a job. Helped during my panic attacks. Defended me. Lifted me up. Made me believe that I, Valencia Giannotti, will get through any inferno because I am capable of rising out of the embers.
Flashing red and blue lights blind me. Two police cars park in front of the house and cut the sirens. I hear Helena’s steps behind us.
I have to face this all by myself, but I’ll continue holding on. The enemy will not beat us. The abductors of my children will come to light. They’ll never win. No. Not anymore.
Game on.
Giulio and I share one final embrace before I give over my tattered soul to the investigation. I’m committed to face it all. The hurt. The pain. The fear. The glory.
We need our three angels. I’m not backing down without a fight.
As the officers near, I take one long glance at Giulio. I take in his sunken eyes and pursed lips. His beaten body and his glistering tears. His inner demons and the exposed lie. Yet, all I see are his beautiful silver linings. His love. His hopes. His ruthless sacrifices for his family.
With all his vulnerabilities and our passionate reckoning unveiled, it dawns on me that our story isn’t over. I still want this. I still love him. In fact, I don’t think I will ever be capable of not loving Giulio Giannotti.
The hunt is on.
Officers. Volunteers. Search parties. Media coverage. Helicopters hovering in the skies. Once again our family has been thrown into the deep end. Oscar and Slonne used to be my lifeline and now they’ve been stripped from me. SPD made it clear that what happened in the early hours of yesterday morning could be one of two things. One, a random carjacking and the perpetrators didn’t notice the children. Or two, another vendetta trap in line with Addilyn’s disappearance. Deep down I know it’s the latter. There has to be a connection.
The tragedy binds us all together.
Kayla and Lance came to see us the moment they heard the news. It
surprised me when Marcus and Bryce also joined us on day one of the search yesterday. Well, mostly surprised about Marcus. They encouraged us and when my brother-in-law saw me, he pulled me into a hug and apologized for acting the way he did. He even went as far as to clear the air with Helena. Tension will always remain there, but at least now it’s simmered.
Somebody else that I didn’t expect to hear from was Zoe. She had heard on the news while driving Samuel to school and somehow found my number to extend her best wishes, alongside an apology. After Giulio laid out our situation straight, Samuel and Slonne remain friends, but she isn’t disturbed with unwelcome kisses anymore. Zoe admitted that she crossed the line and after more moms at the school began avoiding her, she apparently went through some inner soul searching. And who was I to complain? I’ve learned some people do deserve second chances; I mean, I never expected to be friends with a sarcastic Englishman, but life works in strange concepts. So when Zoe mentioned that once this is over she wants to have coffee and start from zero as a peace offering, I decided to give our relationship a second chance.
Naturally, none of us attended work on Monday or today. Giulio made it clear that until Oscar and Slonne are returned to us, Notti Designs will have to run without us. As much as emotion paralyzes me, the entire two days I haven’t shed a tear. Not because this doesn’t affect me but because I’d been too worked up with dismay and exhaustion over constantly being faced with such trauma.
Experiencing this for the second time has destroyed me, but it won’t kill me; that’s what they would want. Whoever is behind this wants us to suffer. I’m not going to allow that to happen.
Once again, the search today is called off just after 7 P.M. These thirty-seven hours without Oscar and Slonne have been hell, but Helena and I return home to hope with a vegetable casserole made by our mother. Given everything going on, Helena thought it would be safer for Weston and Daisy to stay with their grandma in Belltown for the rest of the week while my father’s still in Austria. I couldn’t agree more.
Helena and I talk of every single possible outcome over dinner together. Not if but when the twins will be found safe. I take my anti-depressants after the meal because in the commotion of these past two mornings, I’ve forgotten.
When Helena retreats to bed, I stay in the living room. My mind doesn’t stop ticking. When I’m not thinking of the twins, I’m thinking of Addilyn, and then Giulio. I try to understand why he shot those final shots. Every time the feeling becomes overwhelming, I take a sip of my ginger tea.
When midnight strikes I know I should get a couple of hours of sleep because if I’m not energized in the morning it’ll be impossible to continue the search.
My phone vibrates to a message from an unknown number.
Unknown: Oscar and Slonne Giannotti.
My fingers slap against the screen.
Valencia: Who is this?
Unknown: Come outside and the twins are yours.
What?
If I wasn’t on edge before, I certainly am now. I rush to switch off all the lights and peer through the living room window. My breath staggers at a man leaning against a silver car, a cigarette in one hand, and a phone in the other. My mind jogs back to six weeks ago when I first saw this man across the street. It seems like the same car and it’s no irony that it would be the same guy too.
Oh my…
My first instinct is to call 911 but then another text appears.
Unknown: You’re afraid. You should be.
Attached is a picture of Slonne and Oscar with tape across their mouths. The terror on their faces says it all. My babies…he has my babies…
I almost drop my phone to the floor…almost.
Valencia: Who are you?
Unknown: Come to the car, do what I ask and the twins are yours.
Valencia: You haven’t answered my question.
Unknown: And your husband killed one of ours. Hurry up, Valencia.
He knows.
I back away from the window and don’t think twice. I’m out the door with a clenched jaw and have no idea if this could escalate, but this is for my children and I will do anything for them. I’m still in my Levi’s and dark top from the search this morning. Thoughts of a shower and a change of clothes evaporate as I approach the man.
He looks me up and down as I slide my phone into my back pocket.
The man’s smug smirk grows when he takes one long drag and crushes the death stick underneath his shoe. “Ah, well if it isn’t the Mrs. Giannotti.”
“Where are they?”
“Ease down. We’ve got all night.”
“No, we don’t. I want to know where my children are and I want you to return them to me, now.”
I analyze the unfamiliar man’s every detail. I’ll need it if I ever have to describe him to the police. Dark blond buzz cut. Light, fair features. Lethal blue eyes. Dark garments. The car is a gray Mercedes and I memorize the license number as inconspicuously as possible.
Blue Eyes scoffs and scans my body one final time, slowing at my legs before nodding behind him. “Get in the car. I have something interesting to show you.”
“That photo you sent…I’m not going anywhere until you confirm they’re still alive.”
“Get in the fucking car.”
“No.”
Blue Eyes launches forward and grips my forearm. “Now, I am going to say this once and only once. You don’t step inside the car and your husband dies. I have him, Mrs. Giannotti.”
“What? Giulio?”
“Yes. I tracked him down and let’s just say…you’re not the only one who wants your children back. So, this is what you’re going to do. You’re going to get in the car, I’m going to show you your beloved husband, and then we’ll go from there.”
He doesn’t give me any choice, and soon I’m strapped inside the car before he takes off at high speed. My heart is racing. Does he really have Giulio? Are Oscar and Slonne okay? Jesus, I should have told Helena. I should have called 911 when I had the chance.
Shit. Shit. Shit
Blue Eyes comes to a stop in a dead-end alleyway.
Nightfall has taken over and darkness blankets us as he drags me out of the car and shoves me towards the last building before a tall brick wall. We take a left and resistance overcomes me as a steel circular staircase leads to a metal door.
Blue Eyes unlocks the door with a key and instantly I’m hit with a distinct metallic smell. My gaze remains on the door-handle, even after he threatens me to step inside. By the third time he grips my chin and snarls coldly, “Step the fuck in or there will be consequences.”
I grind my jaw, hiding the fear behind my disgust. “I hope you rot in hell.”
I venture into the dark walled room. There are no windows or rooms beyond these four walls. Bile rises to my throat as my flats slam against the concrete floor as I hurry to the other side of the room.
Giulio is bound to a chair with rope restraining his chest, ankles, and his hands are tied behind his back. He raises his head towards me and I see the bloodied cuts on his face. A mix of metallic from the blood and his masculine cologne welcomes me. He’s been slashed twice by his cheekbone and the blood pools. My entire body heaves as I look around for something, anything, but there’s nothing and so I scrunch up my long sleeve shirt and dab away at the crimson.
When I cup his jaw, I’m careful to miss his wounds. “You’re okay, I’m going to get you out of here, alright? Everything will be okay.”
Giulio seems disorientated at first, before that familiar warmth blends in his eyes and he smiles softly through the torment.
“Don’t speak too fast.” The door slams shut and coldness seeps straight through my bones. It’s a confined space and the way Blue Eyes grips my neck from behind to make me stand and turn around makes it tinier. “I pulled the same stunt on him that I pulled on you. What? Thought your kids were here? You think a mere photo is enough to make a deal?”
“I’ll do anything, just please don’t h
urt him or them. What do I have to do?”
“A very simple thing.” Blue Eyes responds to my urgency with a sinful chuckle. “I’ll lead you to the twins but you need to do something for me first.”
“What is it?”
“I’m a very sentimental man and so when individuals interfere with my process, I feel it right here.” His gaze lowers and finger brushes against my breasts, landing at my heart. “Your husband killed one of my men. Even if I didn’t see it, I know he did. So there is only one way to go about it. Once it’s done, then Oscar and Slonne are yours.”
“No! Please, don’t kill him!”
“Don’t worry. I’m not going to kill Giulio Giannotti…you are.”
I have no air. It’s cut. Nothing travels to my lungs. My head shakes over and over. Tears spill over as I step away from him. Giulio doesn’t say a word. When I turn to him and find he’s staring down at the concrete floor, it’s as if fate has already claimed him.
“No. No, I’m not doing that.”
“You will.” Blue Eyes pulls a gun from the back of his waistband. “This is how it’s gonna be. These are soundproof walls. Kill Giulio and your children will be returned to you. If you don’t pull the trigger, I will kill you first, then him, and then…I will destroy your children one by one.”
“You can’t do this!”
“Oh yes I can, sweetheart. Don’t waste all your impeccable beauty in a morgue.”
The weight of the gun is heavier than I expected when it’s placed in my hands. Blue Eyes grips my shoulders, turns me to face Giulio, and directs me on how to hold the weapon properly. My hands are shaking. Everything turns black and white. I look at Giulio and all I see is my life.
I don’t want to do this.
I cannot do this.
Tears blur my vision when Blue Eyes retreats, I wipe away the wetness and take in Giulio. The man cocks another gun and aims it at me. “I’m going to count to twenty. By the end of that, you take off the safety and you pull the trigger. Fail to do so, and my first bullet goes straight into you. I’ll let him watch you take your last breath and be helpless to save you. Understand?”
Merciful Vows: A Bittersweet Second Chance Romantic Suspense (The Giannotti World Book 1) Page 34