With a wink and a grand smile, she said, “Well, you sure are cute. Your eyes are a little freaky, but you’re welcome to come back anytime.”
I nodded ignoring her comment about my eyes, having heard it all before, and followed her to the door. When I stepped outside, waiting hands were there to slap my back in congratulations. The door closed behind me and our group moved a small distance away before I was assaulted with questions.
“How was it?”, “What the fuck were you doing to her in there?”, “She was screaming bloody murder!” were some of them thrown at me all at once.
Sandy, who’d set the whole thing up, intervened. “Guys, give the man some room.”
The man comment made my chest puff up as I watched my brother wave his hand. It was like magic, sending everyone to put distance between us.
“Well?” one of my buddies asked as they all stared at me in anticipation.
It was then I realized, friends or not, it wasn’t any of their business. The big reveal they hoped for wasn’t happening. In grand fashion, I shrugged, sporting what I was sure the biggest smirk ever.
“Aww, man, come on,” they pleaded at once, while my brother stood stoic and waiting.
I shrugged again, having nothing to say. I’d never been much of a talker. I was the guy who sat and watched things happen while waiting for my moment.
A torrent of words was hurled at me, trying to convince me not to keep the details to myself.
“Dudes, let the man be.”
My brother was the commanding presence that caused all eyes to shoot in his direction. He was well respected by me and my comrades. He didn’t treat us like little kids, which earned our admiration. They traded glances with me before I nodded. They looped off in deep conversation, speculating about my first time.
“So?” Sandy asked after they’d rounded a corner of another trailer.
He was one of the two people in the world I trusted. Even though I looked up to him, I didn’t want to give him all the details either.
He didn’t push, so when I remained quiet, he asked, “At least tell me you finished?”
I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t speak. There was so much I had to figure out. The experience had been mind-bending. So, I bobbed my head instead.
He slapped my back hard. If he hadn’t taught me over the years how to take a lick, I might have stumbled forward. But he had and couldn’t kick my ass as easily as he used to.
We walked the long way home, and I half listened to him speak. Mostly, I replayed in my head what it had felt like to be inside a girl for the first time. It was far better than I’d imagined. More importantly, it had drained all my worries away. I’d thought of nothing about how life sucked. Thus I would have to do it again and soon.
What shocked the shit out of me was finding Mom sitting on the porch of our tiny four-room house, if you didn’t count the only bathroom. Sandy was just as surprised to see her as I was.
I found my voice, which was a mix of low and high tones. “Mom, you’re home?”
It was a stupid question and maybe I’d lost several brain cells while having sex. But she worked two jobs, and I rarely saw her. I thought maybe she was there to tell us we had to move again because we were being kicked out.
“I couldn’t miss today.” She stood and enveloped me in a hug. All I could do was pray I didn’t smell like pussy. I had no desire to explain to Mom what I’d been up to. “I had two good reasons to take off this evening.”
Her eyes focused on me. “Happy birthday, Kelley.”
It wasn’t fake. I truly felt the smile that split my face open. Mom had that effect on people, including me. She made everyone feel welcome and happy to be alive.
“Thanks, Mom.”
She smelled like fresh flowers, and I closed my eyes a second, fighting the urge to be her baby boy. It felt too good to have her arms around me. I pulled back and glanced at my brother, waiting for the jab.
He ruffled my hair. “How does it feel to be thirteen, little bro?”
He’d stopped calling me kid that long ago night, five years in the wind.
“Don’t bother him,” Mom chided. “Besides, I’m also here to spend the evening with my oldest son, who’s shipping out tomorrow.”
That one sentence shifted the mood. The celebration was over that quick as tears threatened to spill from Mom’s eyes. Sandy had to report for duty with the marines, and I wasn’t sure how I was going to handle things when he was gone.
“It’s only four years and I’ll be back. They’ll pay for school and everything after I’m discharged. Besides, I won’t need my paychecks and will be able to send you most of the money I earn. Then you can quit one of your jobs.”
We hated that Mom worked so hard for us and always looked tired. It was the reason I hadn’t begged my brother to stay because Dad had been manageable since that night. He still drank, but he wasn’t as violent.
When Mom’s smile melted away, I knew she saw it. My hair half hid it, but Mom’s eagle eye noticed most everything. She reached over and pushed the hair from my right eye.
“What happened?”
I sighed. “Got shit from some kid about my name. He got a lucky shot in, but I finished him.” Sandy’s brows arched. “Why did you give us girl names anyway?”
Mom frowned. “Kelley was a boy’s name long before it became a popular girl’s name. It’s an Irish name.”
“What about Sandy?” I asked.
She eyed my brother before answering. “It’s your Dad’s father’s name. Besides, it was originally a Scottish boy’s name, not a girl’s name.”
We’d never known any of our grandparents. Dad never spoke about his parents, and Mom didn’t get along with hers. I was about to ask why name my brother after someone he never talked about when through the open screen door, a voice called out that grated on my nerves.
“Jackie, get me a beer, honey.”
We all traded glances before Mom looked away, unable to meet our eyes. We’d begged her to leave him, but she wouldn’t. She said we didn’t understand that he was a good man. No good man would ever hurt his wife the way he did. At least no TV show I’d seen with a happy family showed the father beating his wife.
I reached out to stop her from following that prick’s instructions. She gave me a small smile before my hand fell away. The screech of the door opening voiced my silent scream. I hated my father and the shit he put us through.
Sandy placed a hand on my shoulder. “You have to be the man of the house now.” I nodded. “You’ll be fine. Just keep out of Dad’s way.” I nodded again. “I’ll be back before you know it.”
He held out a fist, and I bumped it. I was tall, but I hadn’t yet grown as big as my brother. I wouldn’t be able to handle our father when he got drunk like Sandy could. The only thing I’d be able to do would be to stand in front of Mom when he felt the need to punch someone. I could take it better than she could.
Months Later
We stood in front of the board where the final list was posted.
“Oh my God, oh my God,” Debbie screamed while jumping up and down. She grabbed my hand, and I found myself jumping too. “Lenny, we’re in. We’re in.”
Freshman year of high school was a big deal and to make the cheerleading squad was even bigger. I wasn’t sure exactly how I felt about it. It was something Debbie wanted, and I thought I wanted too. Having it didn’t give me the flutters in my stomach I thought it would.
When she finally calmed down, she steered me to her locker with subtle glances over her shoulder. A pack of boys clustered nearby, and I thought she was about to comment on them when she leaned in.
She whispered to me while she spun the combination on her locker. “Rumor has it—”
We were interrupted when a shadow covered us. I stood straight and glanced over her shoulder.
It was interesting how my best friend of all my life changed in the presence of a boy. Plus, these days she always did most of the talking. Faster than me, she s
pun around and greeted our visitor.
“Ox, how are you?”
Odin, better known by his nickname Ox, barely glanced down at her. He gave her a tilt of his head in acknowledgment. Her face soured when his gaze shifted to me.
“Lenny, I was wondering what you were doing Friday night.”
Not spending it with you, I wanted to say. Ox had made a reputation for himself over the summer. He’d popped a few cherries and broken a few hearts if rumors were to be believed.
“I’m busy.” I was proud of myself for not sounding self-righteous when I said it. No need to be rude.
“Oh. Okay.” He nodded and trudged off.
Debbie turned slowly to glare at me. “Why did you do that?”
I didn’t cower under her scrutiny as she expected. Most of the time, I gave into her whims, not wanting to fight.
“He’s the most popular boy in our class. And he could get us into senior parties,” she went on.
“And,” I mocked horror. “He’s never given me the time of day before. I won’t be another check on his list.”
She rolled her eyes. “Stop being a baby. He’s cute, rich, and on the football team.”
“And?”
“You’re a lost cause.” Her exasperated sigh was her only sign of defeat.
“You date him then,” I suggested.
“Well, that’s what I was trying to tell you. He’s made it known to everyone he’s interested in you. No guy is going to talk to you now.”
My suffering sigh was more like a groan as I longed for an older brother or someone to defend my honor because what she said was true. Ox was a big, intimidating guy, hence the name. The fact that his family had money would only add to making other guys afraid to ask me out.
“I can’t believe it.” I groaned.
“Believe it, sister. He wants you, and he won’t give up until he has you.”
The day took forever to end. My worst fears that Debbie voiced came true. I paid special attention to one guy I crushed on. We’d been trading glances in math class over the past week, but he hadn’t looked in my direction at all today.
Mom waited at the curb when I stomped out of school annoyed. I tossed myself in her car, hating how things had turned out. I should have been excited I’d made the cheer squad. Instead, I wished we’d move and go to another school.
“What’s with the long face?” Mom asked.
Everyone knew everyone in this small town. So when I told her about how Ox had laid his sights on me, she knew exactly who I was talking about.
“Honey, you should be flattered. Like your father and I have always told you, you are so pretty, and boys are going to beat down our door to ask you out.”
“Mom, I’m not that pretty. Besides, I wish he’d find someone else to target,” I mumbled.
Debbie, I thought in the back of my head. She would relish the idea of going out with him. I wondered—not for the first time—what we had in common anymore besides being childhood friends. Lately, we had different views on life. I wanted to make something of myself and get out of this sleepy town. Debbie would be happy being the next Teen Mom to the right boy in town, including Ox.
“It can’t be that bad,” Mom said.
“It is when said boy is only looking for one thing.”
That shut her up. I popped my ear buds in and let the music flow for the short ride home.
Around the dinner table that night, it was tense. I wasn’t exactly surprised when my father announced there was something he wanted to talk about.
“Lenora, um…”
Dad wasn’t ever unsure with his words. The fact that he paused freaked me out. Were they going to tell me they were getting a divorce? Things hadn’t been great at home recently. My parents fought constantly behind closed doors. I guess they thought I couldn’t hear them through the paper thin walls. But, I’d heard enough.
“Things aren’t good at work.”
That news felt worse as they pinned me with the weight of it. Suddenly it was apparent my wish for moving might become a reality. We weren’t exactly rolling in it. Our small house was barely on the good side of town.
“However, I have an opportunity to make things better. A new potential client might solidify my position in the firm as they continue with cuts.”
Suddenly, I wanted to be five again. I didn’t want to know we had money problems. My heartbeat thudded in my chest. Was he saying we were almost homeless? What did it mean? And why was he telling me?
“What are you saying, Dad?”
I glanced at Mom, but she quickly looked away.
“It’s okay, honey. If the worst happens, we’ll survive. We might have to dip into your college fund until we get back on our feet. But we won’t be thrown out of our house.”
My mouth gaped. It became clear why I was being let in on the news. My college fund was my ticket out of town. And while I understood having a place to sleep was more important, it still stung that I could be stuck going to community college and living at home after I graduated.
“Can’t Mom get a job?” I blurted.
It had been too easy to throw Mom under the bus. Still, she had able hands. Why did I have to lose my college fund for her to stay at home? I wasn’t a little kid anymore.
“I’m sorry.” I quickly backtracked. It was selfish of me and knee jerk reaction to the bomb they dropped on me. “I can quit cheerleading and get a job. I hear they’re hiring at the diner.”
Dad shook his head. “There’s no need. Like I said, I have a solution.”
I glanced between them, not getting it. Mom couldn’t meet my eye.
“I’m attending a business dinner with the potential client Friday night. You and Mom will attend.”
It wasn’t unusual for me to go to a business dinner. Especially when I was younger and Dad’s clients had kids the same age.
“Okay,” I said, not sure why it was a big deal. The way Mom continued to not look at me only made me wonder more what it had to do with me.
“You might know the family. When they talked about dinner they mentioned their son went to school with you.”
He hadn’t said the words, but I felt his meaning. There weren’t many families in town with enough money to be one of Dad’s potential clients. Most of his clients were from the city. So it didn’t take long for me to put two and two together and why Mom couldn’t look at me directly.
“Ox,” I shrilled. When Dad nodded, I nearly shouted. “You can’t be serious. What are you, pimping me out?”
Mom cringed, and Dad shook his head in a short bust of side to side movement. “Absolutely not,” Dad declared. “It’s just dinner, and I’m asking you to be nice.”
“When am I not nice?”
“Your mom told me about your conversation this afternoon.”
Then I remembered how I explained what happened with Ox. Mom had tried to make his intentions okay. I glared at her. Somehow they knew about Ox’s interest in me.
“He only wants one thing. What should I do when he makes that clear?”
Twice today, I’d let my feelings known. I hadn’t ever been that outspoken. I’d been the good little girl. However, I couldn’t let my parents dictate who I dated. They were guilt tripping me into it.
“It’s only one night. Let me secure them as a client and you won’t have to deal with him again,” Dad promised.
Air escaped my lungs and so had the fight in me. Dad needed his job, therefore we needed it. What was one night? Then I remembered Ox asking me out Friday night. I’d told him I was busy. Had he known about the dinner? Would he and his family hold it over our heads?
I couldn’t eat another bite. I tossed my napkin over my half eaten dinner and headed to my room. I picked my phone from the charger and dialed my best friend for advice.
“Oh my God, Kelley,” she begged.
“Keep quiet or someone will hear,” I whispered fiercely.
It was after school, but her words would carry in the silence. The mostly unu
sed bathroom in the back of the school was a popular spot to make out. Last thing I needed was to get caught. I’d been in enough brawls that the principal had warned me I was on a short leash. And I’d promised Mom I would graduate high school eventually.
Luckily, the girl wrapped around me complied, closing her red stained lips shut. I’d learned over the last two years girls liked to be told what to do during sex, which suited me fine.
I shoved in and out of her until I was close enough. The secret to girls getting off lay between their legs. The magic button would send them into never-never land if I touched it right. I stroked it, not bothering to carry on much longer. She’d already pulled me from the zone with her shouts and who knew if someone was coming.
As soon as my finger made contact, she lifted off. Her back arched and her pussy milked my dick like one would milk a cow. I bit my lower lip, holding in a groan. Everything drifted away in those final seconds. I was lost to the pleasure that coursed through me. The feeling was like a drug, and I’d worked my way through the girls in the school to get my fix.
Everything was silent for a couple of beats as my heart thundered in my chest. Finally, I pulled out and flushed the condom in a stall a few feet away. I turned around to find her straightening her clothes. I tucked myself away and did my pants up.
“So, are you coming to my graduation party Friday night?”
“You don’t graduate until May.”
She shrugged. “I’m celebrating all year. Are you coming or what?”
I glanced her over as she stood with her hands folded over her chest.
“What’s in it for me?”
Her mouth split in a grin, and she moved over to me, swaying her hips. But we’d fucked and it wasn’t the first time. Further, I wasn’t pussy whipped by girls like a lot of other guys in school.
“Me, of course,” she said, sliding her arms up my chest and gazing into my eyes like I should be impressed with that offer.
“And I have you.”
Her smile turned into a pout, and she slapped at my chest but without any force.
Sidelined: A Wilde Players Dirty Romance Page 14