She and Allan

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She and Allan Page 24

by H. Rider Haggard


  CHAPTER XIV

  ALLAN MISSES OPPORTUNITY

  All the while that she was talking thus the Lady or the Queen or theWitch-woman, Ayesha, had been walking up and down the place from thecurtains to the foot of the dais, sweeping me with her scented robes asshe passed to and fro, and as she walked she waved her arms as an oratormight do to emphasise the more moving passages of her tale. Now at theend of it, or what I took to be the end, she stepped on to the dais andsank upon the couch as if exhausted, though I think her spirit was wearyrather than her body.

  Here she sat awhile, brooding, her chin resting on her hand, thensuddenly looked up and fixing her glance upon me--for I could see theflash of it through her thin veil--said,

  "What think you of this story, Allan? Do you believe it and have youever heard its like?"

  "_Never_," I answered with emphasis, "and of course I believe everyword. Only there are one or two questions that with your leave I wouldwish to ask, Ayesha."

  "By which you mean, Allan, that you believe nothing, being by naturewithout faith and doubtful of all that you cannot see and touch andhandle. Well, perhaps you are wise, since what I have told you is notall the truth. For example, it comes back to me now that it was not inthe temple on the Nile, or indeed upon the Earth, that I saw the visionof Aphrodite and of Isis, but elsewhere; also that it was here in Korthat I was first consumed by passion for Kallikrates whom hitherto I hadscorned. In two thousand years one forgets much, Allan. Out with yourquestions and I will answer them, unless they be too long."

  "Ayesha," I said humbly, reflecting to myself that my questions would,at any rate, be shorter than her varying tale, "even I who am notlearned have heard of these goddesses of whom you speak, of the GrecianAphrodite who rose from the sea upon the shores of Cyprus and dwelt atPaphos and elsewhere----"

  "Yes, doubtless like most men you have heard of her and perchance alsohave been struck across the eyes with her hair, like your betters beforeyou," she interrupted with sarcasm.

  "----Also," I went on, avoiding argument, "I have heard of Isis of theEgyptians, Lady of the Moon, Mother of Mysteries, Spouse of Osiris whosechild was Horus the Avenger."

  "Aye, and I think will hear more of her before you have done, Allan, fornow something comes back to me concerning you and her and another. Iam not the only one who has broken the oaths of Isis and received hercurse, Allan, as _you_ may find out in the days to come. But what ofthese heavenly queens?"

  "Only this, Ayesha; I have been taught that they were but phantasmsfabled by men with many another false divinity, and could have swornthat this was true. And yet you talk of them as real and living, whichperplexes me."

  "Being dull of understanding doubtless it perplexes you, Allan. Yet ifyou had imagination you might understand that these goddesses are greatPrinciples of Nature; Isis, of throned Wisdom and strait virtue, andAphrodite, of Love, as it is known to men and women who, being human,have it laid upon them that they must hand on the torch of Life in theirlittle hour. Also you would know that such Principles can seem to takeshape and form and at certain ages of the world appear to their servantsvisible in majesty, though perchance to-day others with changed nameswield their sceptres and work their will. Now you are answered on thismatter. So to the next."

  Privately I did not feel as though I were answered at all and I was surethat I know nothing of the kind she indicated, but thinking it best toleave the subject, I went on,

  "If I understood rightly, Ayesha, the events which you have been pleasedfirst to describe to me, and then to qualify or contradict, took placewhen the Pharaohs reigned. Now no Pharaoh has sat upon the throne ofEgypt for near two thousand years, for the last was a Grecian woman whomthe Romans conquered and drove to death. And yet, Ayesha, you speak asthough you have lived all through that gulf of time, and in this theremust be error, because it is impossible. Therefore I suppose you to meanthat this history has come down to you in writing, or perhaps in dreams.I believe that even in such far-off times there were writers of romance,and we all know of what stuff dreams are made. At least this thoughtcomes to me," I added hurriedly, fearing lest I had said too much, "andone so wise as you are, I repeat, knows well that a woman who says shehas lived two thousand years must be mad or--suffer from delusions,because I repeat, it is impossible."

  At these quite innocent remarks she sprang to her feet in a rage thatmight truly be called royal in every sense.

  "Impossible! Romance! Dreams! Delusions! Mad!" she cried in a ringingvoice. "Oh! of a truth you weary me, and I have a mind to send youwhither you will learn what is impossible and what is not. Indeed, Iwould do it, and now, only I need your services, and if I did therewould be none left for me to talk with, since your companion ismoonstruck and the others are but savages of whom I have seen enough.

  "Hearken, fool! _Nothing_ is impossible. Why do you seek, you who talkof the impossible, to girdle the great world in the span of your twohands and to weigh the secrets of the Universe in the balance of yourpetty mind and, of that which you cannot understand, to say that it isnot? Life you admit because you see it all about you. But that it shouldendure for two thousand years, which after all is but a second's beat inthe story of the earth, that to you is 'impossible,' although in truththe buried seed or the sealed-up toad can live as long. Doubtless, also,you have some faith which promises you this same boon to all eternity,after the little change called Death.

  "Nay, Allan, it is possible enough, like to many other things of whichyou do not dream to-day that will be common to the eyes of those whofollow after you. Mayhap you think it impossible that I should speakwith and learn of you from yonder old black wizard who dwells in thecountry whence you came. And yet whenever I will I do so in the nightbecause he is in tune with me, and what I do shall be done by all men inthe years unborn. Yes, they shall talk together across the wide spacesof the earth, and the lover shall hear her lover's voice although greatseas roll between them. Nor perchance will it stop at this; perchance infuture time men shall hold converse with the denizens of the stars, andeven with the dead who have passed into silence and the darkness. Do youhear and understand me?"

  "Yes, yes," I answered feebly.

  "You lie, as you are too prone to do. You hear but you do not understandnor believe, and oh! you vex me sorely. Now I had it in my mind totell you the secret of this long life of mine; long, mark you, but notendless, for doubtless I must die and change and return again, likeothers, and even to show you how it may be won. But you are not worthyin your faithlessness."

  "No, no, I am not worthy," I answered, who at that moment did not feelthe least desire to live two thousand years, perhaps with this woman asa neighbour, rating me from generation to generation. Yet it is true,that now when I am older and a certain event cannot be postponed muchlonger, I do often regret that I neglected to take this unique chance,if in truth there was one, of prolonging an existence which after allhas its consolations--especially when one has made one's pile. Certainlyit is a case, a flagrant case, of neglected opportunities, and my onlyconsolation for having lost them is that this was due to the uprightnessof my nature which made it so hard for me to acquiesce in alternativestatements that I had every cause to disbelieve and thus to give offenceto a very powerful and petulant if attractive lady.

  "So that is done with," she went on with a little stamp of indignation,"as soon you will be also, who, had you not crossed and doubted me,might have lived on for untold time and become one of the masters of theworld, as I am."

  Here she paused, choked, I think, with her almost childish anger, andbecause I could not help it, I said,

  "Such place and power, if they be yours, Ayesha, do not seem to bringyou much reward. If I were a master of the world I do not think that Ishould choose to dwell unchangingly among savages who eat men and ina pile of ruins. But perhaps the curses of Aphrodite and of Isis arestronger masters still?" and I paused inquiringly.

  This bold argument--for now I see that it was bold--seemed to astonishand even bewilder my wonde
rful companion.

  "You have more wisdom than I thought," she said reflectively, "who havecome to understand that no one is really lord of anything, since abovethere is always a more powerful lord who withers all his pomp and prideto nothingness, even as the great kings learned in olden days, and I,who am higher than they are, am learning now. Hearken. Troubles beset mewherein I would have your help and that of your companions, for which Iwill pay each of you the fee that he desires. The brooding white man whois with you shall free his daughter and unharmed; though that _he_ willbe unharmed I do not promise. The black savage captain shall fight hisfill and gain the glory that he seeks, also something that he seeksstill more. The little yellow man asks nothing save to be with hismaster like a dog and to satisfy at once his stomach and his apishcuriosity. You, Allan, shall see those dead over whom you brood atnight, though the other guerdon that you might have won is now passedfrom your reach because you mock me in your heart."

  "What must we do to gain these things?" I asked. "How can we humblecreatures help one who is all powerful and who has gathered in herbreast the infinite knowledge of two thousand years?"

  "You must make war under my banner and rid me of my foes. As for thereason, listen to the end of my tale and you shall learn."

  I reflected that it was a marvellous thing that this queen who claimedsupernatural powers should need our help in a war, but thinking it wiserto keep my meditations to myself, said nothing. As a matter of fact Imight just as well have spoken, since as usual she read my thoughts.

  "You are thinking that it is strange, Allan, that I, the Mighty andUndying, should seek your aid in some petty tribal battle, and so itwould be were my foes but common savages. But they are more; they aremen protected by the ancient god of this immemorial city of Kor, a greatgod in his day whose spirit still haunts these ruins and whose strengthstill protects the worshippers who cling to him and practise his unholyrites of human sacrifice."

  "How was this god named?" I asked.

  "_Rezu_ was his name, and from him came the Egyptian Re or Ra, since inthe beginning Kor was the mother of Egypt and the conquering people ofKor took their god with them when they burst into the valley of theNile and subdued its peoples long before the first Pharaoh, Menes, woreEgypt's crown."

  "Ra was the sun, was he not?" I asked.

  "Aye, and Rezu also was a sun-god whom from his throne in the fires ofthe Lord of Day, gave life to men, or slew them if he willed with histhunderbolts of drought and pestilence and storm. He was no gentle kingof heaven, but one who demanded blood-sacrifice from his worshippers,yes, even that of maids and children. So it came about that the peopleof Kor, who saw their virgins slain and eaten by the priests of Rezu,and their infants burned to ashes in the fires that his rays lit, turnedthemselves to the worship of the gentle moon, the goddess whom theynamed _Lulala_, while some of them chose Truth for their queen, sinceTruth, they said, was greater and more to be desired than the fierceSun-King or even the sweet Moon-Lady, Truth, who sat above them boththroned in the furthest stars of Heaven. Then the demon, Rezu, grewwroth and sent a pestilence upon Kor and its subject lands and slewtheir people, save those who clung to him in the great apostasy, andwith them some others who served Lulala and Truth the Divine, thatescaped I know not how."

  "Did you see this great pestilence?" I asked, much interested.

  "Nay, it befell generations before I came to Kor. One Junis, a priest,wrote a record of it in the caves yonder where I have my home and whereis the burying-place of the countless thousands that it slew. In myday Kor, of which, should you desire to hear it, I will tell you thehistory, was a ruin as it is now, though scattered in the lands amidstthe tumbled stones which once built up her subject cities, a peoplenamed the Amahagger dwelt in Households, or Tribes and there sacrificedmen by fire and devoured them, following the rites of the demon Rezu.For these were the descendants of those who escaped the pestilence. Alsothere were certain others, children of the worshippers of Lulala whosekingdom is the moon, and of Truth the Queen, who clung to the gentleworship of their forefathers and were ever at war with the followers ofRezu."

  "What brought _you_ to Kor, Ayesha?" I asked irrelevantly.

  "Have I not said that I was led hither by the command and the symbol ofgreat Isis whom I serve? Also," she added after a pause, "that I mightfind a certain pair, one of whom had broken his oaths to her, temptedthereto by the other."

  "And did you find them, Ayesha?" I asked.

  "Aye, I found them, or rather they found me, and in my presencethe goddess executed her decree upon her false priest and drove histemptress back to the world."

  "That must have been dreadful for you, Ayesha, since I understood thatyou also--liked this priest."

  She sprang from her couch and in a low, hissing voice which resembledthe sound made by an angry snake and turned my blood cold to hear,exclaimed,

  "Man, do you dare to mock me? Nay, you are but a blundering, curiousfool, and it is well for you that this is so, since otherwise likeKallikrates, never should you leave Kor living. Cease from seeking thatwhich you may not learn. Suffice it for you to know that the doom ofIsis fell upon the lost Kallikrates, her priest forsworn, and that on mealso fell her doom, who must dwell here, dead yet living, till he returnagain and the play begins afresh.

  "Stranger," she went on in a softer voice, "perchance your faith,whate'er it be, parades a hell to terrify its worshippers and givestrength to the arms of its prophesying priests, who swear they holdthe keys of doom or of the eternal joys. I see you sign assent" (I hadnodded at her extremely accurate guess) "and therefore can understandthat in such a hell as this, here upon the earth I have dwelt for sometwo thousand years, expiating the crime of Powers above me whereof Iam but the hand and instrument, since those Powers which decreed that Ishould love, decree also that I must avenge that love."

  She sank down upon the couch as though exhausted by emotion, of whichI could only guess the reasons, hiding her face in her hands. Presentlyshe let them fall again and continued,

  "Of these woes ask me no more. They sleep till the hour of theirresurrection, which I think draws nigh; indeed, I thought that youperchance----But let that be. 'Twas near the mark; nearer, Allan, thanyou know, not in it! Therefore leave them to their sleep as I would ifI might--ah! if I might, whose companions they are throughout the wearyages. Alas! that through the secret which was revealed to me I remainundying on the earth who in death might perhaps have found a rest,and being human although half divine, must still busy myself with theaffairs of earth.

  "Look you, Wanderer, after that which was fated had happened and Iremained in my agony of solitude and sorrow, after, too, I had drunkof the cup of enduring life and like the Prometheus of old fable, foundmyself bound to this changeless rock, whereon day by day the vulturesof remorse tear out my living heart which in the watches of the night isever doomed to grow again within my woman's breast, I was plunged intopetty troubles of the flesh, aye and welcomed them because their irk attimes gave me forgetfulness. When the savage dwellers in this land cameto know that a mighty one had arisen among them who was the servant ofthe Lady of the Moon, those of them who still worshipped their goddessLulala, gathered themselves about me, while those of them who worshippedRezu sought to overthrow me.

  "'Here,' they said, 'is the goddess Lulala come to earth. In the nameof Rezu let us slay her and make an end,' for these fools thought that Icould be killed. Allan, I conquered them, but their captain, who alsois named Rezu and whom they held and hold to be an emanation of the godhimself walking the earth, I could not conquer."

  "Why not?" I asked.

  "For this reason, Allan. In some past age his god showed him the samesecret that was shown to me. He too had drunk of the Cup of Life andlives on unharmed by Time, so that being in strength my equal, no spearof mine can reach his heart clad in the armour of his evil god."

  "Then what spear can?" I inquired helplessly, who was bewildered.

  "None at all, Allan, yet an _axe_ may, as you shall hear,
or so Ithink. For many generations there has been peace of a sort between theworshippers of Lulala who dwell with me in the Plain of Kor, or ratherof myself, since to these people _I_ am Lulala, and the worshippers ofRezu, who dwell in the strongholds beyond the mountain crest. But oflate years their chief Rezu, having devastated the lands about, hasgrown restless and threatened to attack on Kor, which is not strongenough to stand against him. Moreover he has sought for a white queen torule under him, purposing to set her up to mock my majesty."

  "Is that why those cannibals carried away the daughter of my companion,the Sea-Captain who is named Avenger?" I asked.

  "It is, Allan, since presently he will give it out that I am dead orfled, if he has not done so already, and that this new queen has arisenin my place. Thereby he hopes to draw away many who cling to me ere headvances upon Kor, carrying with him this girl veiled as I am, so thatnone may know the difference between us, since not a man of them hasever looked upon my face, Allan. Therefore this Rezu must die, if die hecan; otherwise, although it is impossible that he should harm me, he mayslay or draw away my people and leave me with none to rule in thisplace where by the decree of Fate I must dwell on until he whom I seekreturns. You are thinking in your heart that such savages would belittle loss and this is so, but still they serve as slaves to me in myloneliness. Moreover I have sworn to protect them from the demon Rezuand they have trusted in me and therefore my honour is at stake, fornever shall it be said that those who trusted in She-who-commands, wereoverthrown because they put faith in one who was powerless."

  "What do you mean about an axe, Ayesha?" I asked. "Why can an axe alonekill Rezu?"

  "The thing is a mystery, O Allan, of which I may not tell you all, sinceto do so I must reveal secrets which I have determined you shall notlearn. Suffice it to you to know that when this Rezu drank of the Cupof Life he took with him his axe. Now this axe was an ancient weaponrumoured to have been fashioned by the gods and, as it chanced, that axedrew to itself more and stronger life than did Rezu, how, it does notmatter, if indeed the tale be more than a fable. At least this I know istrue, for he who guarded the Gate of Life, a certain Noot, a master ofmysteries, and mine also in my day of youth, who being a philosopher andvery wise, chose never to pass that portal which was open to him, saidit to me himself ere he went the way of flesh. He told this Rezualso that now he had naught to fear save his own axe and therefore hecounselled him to guard it well, since if it was lifted against him inanother's hands it would bring him down to death, which nothingelse could do. Like to the heel of Achilles whereof the great Homersings--have you read Homer, Allan?"

  "In a translation," I answered.

  "Good, then you will remember the story. Like to the heel of Achilles,I say, that axe would be the only gate by which death could enter hisinvulnerable flesh, or rather it alone could make the gate."

  "How did Noot know that?" I asked.

  "I cannot say," she answered with irritation. "Perchance he did not knowit. Perchance it is all an idle tale, but at least it is true that Rezubelieved and believes it, and what a man believes is true for him andwill certainly befall. If it were otherwise, what is the use of faithwhich in a thousand forms supports our race and holds it from thehorrors of the Pit? Only those who believe nothing inherit what theybelieve--nothing, Allan."

  "It may be so," I replied prosaically, "but what happened about theaxe?"

  "In the end it was lost, or as some say stolen by a woman whom Rezu haddeserted, and therefore he walks the world in fear from day to day. Nay,ask no more empty questions" (I had opened my mouth to speak) "but hearthe end of the tale. In my trouble concerning Rezu I remembered thiswild legend of the axe and since, when lost in a forest every path thatmay lead to safety should be explored, I sent my wisdom forth to makeinquiry concerning it, as I who am great, have the power to do, ofcertain who are in tune with me throughout this wide land of Africa.Amongst others, I inquired of that old wizard whom you named Zikali,Opener of Roads, and he gave me an answer that there lived in his land acertain warrior who ruled a tribe called the People of the Axe by rightof the Axe, of which axe none, not even he, knew the beginning or thelegend. On the chance, though it was a small one, I bade the wizardsend that warrior here with his axe. Last night he stood before me and Ilooked upon him and the axe, which at least is ancient and has a story.Whether it be the same that Rezu bore I do not know who never saw it,yet perchance he who bears it now is prepared to hold it aloft in battleeven against Rezu, though he be terrible to see, and then we shalllearn."

  "Oh! yes," I answered, "he is quite prepared, for that is his nature.Also among this man's people, the holder of the Axe is thought to beunconquerable."

  "Yet some must have been conquered who held it," she replied musingly."Well, you shall tell me that tale later. Now we have talked long andyou are weary and astonished. Go, eat and rest yourself. To-night whenthe moon rises I will come to where you are, not before, for I have muchthat must be done, and show you those with whom you must fight againstRezu, and make a plan of battle."

  "But I do not want to fight," I answered, "who have fought enough andcame here to seek wisdom, not bloodshed."

  "First the sacrifice, then the reward," she answered, "that is if anyare left to be rewarded. Farewell."

 

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