Who knew I could even feel this way?
In heels, as high as these, it makes me the perfect height to snuggle up to him close, my head at just past his shoulder and I feel his eyes go to my mouth from the side of my face. I frown away the urge to look at him, overly aware that it’s the third time I have gotten the vibe that he wants too and feeling majorly frustrated at him.
What’s stopping you already?
‘Asshole.’ I spit back, nestling closer still to him in his embrace, encouraging more, but also so I don’t need to face him and see exactly how he is looking at me, if he isn’t going to do anything about it. If he wants it, then he has to make some moves, he’s the one who keeps this platonic. The elevator pings and the door slides open.
‘What happened to Massive Douchebag, I liked that one, it has a sexy ring to it.’ He nudges me suggestively with his hip, so I am moved but not knocked over, his face coming close to mine again as he gazes at me with slight humour all over it. He bites on his bottom lip in a very ‘dude’ yet sexy, manner, playful yet that hint of flirt again and I can’t help the sudden heart hammering it causes me, unable to now remove my eyes from that crazily kissable mouth of his.
I am really not imagining there is something subtly different since I walked out wearing this dress. I don’t know if I should ignore it or act upon it, he clearly seems to be testing some sort of internal boundary of his own and I just want him to stop holding back. He has my stomach fluttering, and my body tingling, and fully aware that he is arousing parts of me that I never knew could even get aroused. It’s making me feel unsure of myself, more than a little nervous and definitely antsy around him.
‘You are all of the above and much, much, more.’ I frown petulantly, yelping when he slaps my ass to propel me out of the enclosed box we are now departing, this time I know for a fact this is not how he normally behaves. Arrick slaps asses when carrying on, usually with a little intent, just to piss me off, but this feels more sexual.
Where the hell did this come from?
He Lets me go as I half run, half skip out in front of him, onto the shiny marble floor of the foyer to his building, purely with the force of that butt slap that knocked me off balance. I can still feel where his palm landed and it’s definitely lower than where he normally smacks me. I kind of liked it too, which opens up a whole other can of brain worms, considering my father used to beat me.
He comes up behind me, catches my hand again, something definitely sizzles between us as he leads me out into the guarded main entrance in front of huge glass doors onto New York’s busy streets,. He nods at the security man, seemingly oblivious to it nonetheless, sat behind a marble desk and I recognise the little old man and beam at him; he is my favourite of the desk clerks and usually only on at night, so I don’t see him very often anymore. He has been here for years, the whole two years Arry has lived here anyway, and I always love to chat to him.
‘Have a good night Mr Carrero, Miss Huntsberger.’ He grins at us and holds out the cellophane wrapped red lollipop as we pass. I squeal my delight, letting Arrick’s hand loose so I can go collect my familiar offering from just about the best security guard in the whole of the city. Completely elated that even after months, he still remembers, and still keeps these for me.
‘Thank you, Mr Frankie, always a pleasure. Tell Mrs Frankie I said hi.’ I giggle sweetly and unwrap my confection, dropping the paper in the waste bin he holds out to me, with my most genuine smile his way
‘Strawberry whirl. Your favourite. Been keeping you one for a few days now.’ He beams back at me and I feel Arrick tug at the back of my coat softly, smiling at me from behind.
‘You too Frank, we shouldn’t be too late. This one has a curfew.’ Arrick smiles at him and tugs me back to follow. I give Frank a little finger wave and a smile, as I pop the lollipop in my mouth to suck on its sweet yummy flavour, I catch Arrick’s eyes go to my mouth as I do so and the uncomfortable frown he gives off before looking away, confirms his head is definitely on sex in that moment. He clears his throat softly and carries on regardless. I however grin to myself. A little smug that the guy who could only ever see me as platonic, just got an urge from me sucking off a lollipop.
High five.
I always was a sucker for these things, and Frank’s been plying me with them since Arrick moved here. I feel a hundred times happier with a candy in my mouth, a hint of sexual tension from my favourite man, like somehow everything just got so much better.
We get out onto the street and the doorman, holding the door for us, motions to the yellow cab, sitting patiently on the curb, obviously sat waiting for us. Arrick leads me to it and opens the door for me. As I go to slide in he whips the lollipop out of my mouth in a super sleek, fast move, that I don’t even see coming.
‘Hey! That’s mine.’ I snap petulantly, shocked at his sneaky manoeuvre, but he closes my door before I can grab it back, he skirts the back of the cab and gets in the other side with it in his mouth, smirking at me with that devilish look in his eye and I just look at him in open mouthed un-amusement. I snatch it right back, yanking it out of his mouth and stick it back in mine without hesitation. He just looks amused, like he gets a kick out of being an asshole to me sometimes, highlight of his day and all that.
It tastes a little of him, but I like it, realising that we pretty much just sucked the same lollipop and it could kind of be classed as kissing in a very vague way. It just reminds me of what it’s like to be actually kissed by him and I have to push it away, before the fire in my panties gets any hotter.
‘I have herpes.’ He nudges me jokingly and pulls his own door shut, the cab driver nods and utters the address he has been told by the doorman. Arrick nods and sits back to get comfy as we move off.
‘Yum! Add it to the ever-growing list of weird stuff Arrick Carrero has given me over the years.’ I answer sassily.
‘You’re welcome.’ He winks and I just eye roll in answer, happy to sit and suck on my candy and ignore him for the ten-minute journey, in a bid to calm these damn hormonal flushes. No one comes between me and candy, it’s like a major weakness on the ever-growing list and I don’t care if it ruins my lipstick right now.
Arrick gazes out the window, going strangely into that closed off face of his and I wonder if he is contemplating his own reactions. He automatically places his hand in my lap, his hand moving to curve around my thigh which means his fingers end up kind of nestled between my legs, just above my knee sensually. I pause and look down at the way his hand is most connected to my naked skin, in a gesture that I wouldn’t expect from him, more something I would expect to see Jake do to Emma, and glance back his way. He’s looking out the window, completely oblivious, and I don’t know whether to relax and accept this as innocent, or enjoy the tingles and low-down heat, his hand possessively holding my leg, is giving me. Torn that this might be deliberate, and kind of disappointed he didn’t aim lower. Another little clue that his head is not on platonic where I am concerned tonight, and I find myself wondering if this is actually going to go anywhere, with a sense of excited nerves. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but he is really giving me a whole different set of vibes tonight.
He’s never laid hands on me this way before, and the fact he doesn’t seem to even be reacting, or has even noticed, has me even more aware of it maybe being innocent. I try not to shift in case I draw attention, but as we stop abruptly, when the driver hits the break hard, I am catapulted forward. His hand tenses on me to keep me seated, but the combination of slippy leather cab seat, and satin dress over my butt, means I slide forward, dress hitches up and Arrick’s hand ends up firmly planted between my thighs, makes a connection that has me gasp inwards in a completely inappropriate way, loudly and my lollipop meets the floor in a dramatic release.
Hot strong male hand, most definitely bumps and cups, malfunctioning, throbbing, lace covered lady parts, and his sudden head turn, eyes meeting mine with sheer mortification and the retraction of said hand has us both
looking away awkwardly. Arrick clears his throat and shifts in his seat, I push myself back and wriggle my skirt down as the car moves on again and I see that the car in front has been the reason we stopped. A broken down, hot mess, of a trashy pick up, is sat in the middle of the street, spewing smoke, as our driver moves around it and gets us back on track.
I most definitely got a reaction, down there, low in my pelvis. I can still pretty much feel the heat of his hand on me as my heart and stomach doing somersaults. I can’t say it feels anything but freakishly good and now the ache going off inside of me has me squirming and wanting more in a much more agonisingly intense way.
What the hell is wrong with me?
‘Sorry.’ Arrick mutters out of the window, and I feel myself blushing hard, a giggle threatening to creep up and I cannot deny that his hand down there, did not in any way send off any of my usual crazy repulsive defence alarms. It just made me want to pull my dress up and sit on his lap.
Jesus Sophie, what the hell?
The thought shocks me, yet also makes me feel a little bit hopeful, knowing that he can not only touch, but ignite, something down there, and it means that maybe there is a slight chance that I could go further with someone. All the way, as in sex. Maybe him if he ever thought of letting us try and stopped cooling off this weird and obvious tension between us tonight. I don’t know how to feel about that right now, and all this craziness in my head has me squirming and blushing like crazy, my head clearly not on candy anymore and pretty sure he will be able to read this in my face if he looks my way.
I just feel super weird, naughty, wanton right now, and kind of a little bit uncomfortable that my brain is even going there. I glance his way and realise he’s staring at me again, I hadn’t even realised he turned back to me and catch his eyes with a little jump. His gaze is completely unreadable, eyes focused on mine and his pupils look crazily large. For once, the look sends a hot fiery pulse right to my core, like somehow even I know, without much experience in this thing when it comes to him, that he’s looking at me like he wants to get naked with me. I swallow hard as nerves literally kill all my bravado in one fell swoop.
I throw a casual ‘forget it’ smile and look away quickly, trying to hide the craziness erupting inside of me. Aware that his eyes are still on me, yet this time he feels for my hand, pulls it into his and entangles our fingers securely, cupping both with his free hand and giving me the impression he is making sure that little incident doesn’t happen again. Back to cooling his jets and sticking me on the side of platonic.
Chapter 23
We find his group fast, enveloped into handshakes and hugs and I even recognise a couple of familiar faces of people I have seen Arrick with over the years. I am passed from person to person, as we reacquaint and Arrick is caught in the throes of welcomes and back slaps. I like that he’s always been this sociable, liked guy. He eases into the whole guy among guys thing so fluidly, at home with his circle of friends and at ease to just be Arry. Not a Rich tycoon Carrero, or even Arrick Carrero, fighter extraordinaire.
The club is pretty cool, one I am sure I have never been too and it’s obvious the door fee is higher than most places, by the type of people milling around. It screams trendy, upmarket and stinks of money. I’m surprised that he comes here, I know they usually opt for classier places, but normally he likes more middle ground clubs. Affordable for his friends who were not born into money, and this is clearly not one of those. Knowing him though, he probably paid the door and bar tab in advance for whoever’s birthday this is. That’s what he’s like.
‘You look amazing.’ Nathan, Arrick’s best friend, and fight promoter, winks at me, grabs my hand and makes me do a little twirl under his arm. Evaluating the new and improved Sophie, as it’s been weeks since I last saw him. I am free of my coat as Arry takes them to dump on a nearby chair.
‘Thanks, not so bad yourself old man.’ I jest with him. I have known Nathan as long as I have known Arrick, he used to frequent all the group trips he ever took me on. He now works tirelessly to put my boys face all over the New York fight scene, and is the reason Arrick is fast becoming a known star. I love Nathan to bits, he’s tall with dark, almost black hair and deep brown eyes, pretty cute as men go and totally built like a boxer. I know he sometimes trains with Arry, but never went down the route of becoming a pro. He’s cocky, generally a womaniser, with a cheeky smile, roaming eye, and serious aversion to commitment. Like most of Arrick’s friends at points of their lives, I guess.
‘Boy needs to man up and lay claim before I do.’ He grins and leans in to give me a chaste kiss on the cheek. Innocent enough, he’s one of the few men I sort of trust, almost as much as my brothers. Laughing when Arrick pushes him aside jokingly, returning to my side.
‘Hands off, this one’s a lady and will always be out of bounds. For an eternity.’ Arrick jokes, placing me beside him and away from Nathan with a smirk, a little hands-off joke and I can only eyeroll. I would never go there with Nathan, not for anything. It would be weird as hell and besides, he’s always been Arrick’s best friend and would be wrong on so many levels. Plus, he doesn’t look anywhere near as good as Arry does, in any way shape or form.
Arrick accepts the beer Nathan hands to him, sliding a glass of wine my way, that he’s bought me, and I accept with a smile, raising a brow at the saucy wink Nathan gives me and laughing when Arry sucker punches him in the abdomen for it, with the back of his beer bottle hand. Nathan laughs.
‘Sure this is all as platonic as you two like to make out?’ He jests, and only grins wider when he catches that narrowed glare that his bestie throws him, it’s clear he knows exactly what has been going on with us and his dig at Arrick just makes me feel a little uncomfortable. Nathan always likes to make jokes that graze a little close to the bone, even with warnings from Arry. I look down at my drink and just look away, ignoring what looks transpire between them.
Arrick turns away, someone tapping him on the shoulder draws his attention and when he dips down to kiss someone on the cheek, my heart sinks as Natasha comes into view. All smiles and curls and doe eyes, he moves to give her a small hug too, before coming back to stand by me and Nate. He glances my way briefly, I work so hard to remain impassive and just stare at my glass instead, giving no hint of the war of emotion that runs through me. My gut always knew she would show up, even though he never mentioned her, and I just feel instantly sombre. I just want to leave, put the glass down, and hop in a cab back home.
‘Hiya Sophie, you look really beautiful tonight. I love that dress.’ She beams at me and for once I get an ache of something in my stomach in relation to her, that is not hatred. I get that maybe she thinks we bonded in the bathroom the other night, but this is still just plain weird that she is still being super nice to me; especially as I just spent the last half hour thinking about sex with her boyfriend. I feel awkward and have to admit, I do notice that she actually looks prettier than normal.
‘You too. Your dress is pretty cute.’ I answer her honestly, eyeing up the sort of loose girly floral dress that is enough edgy in style to look right for a club. I do however mentally try and picture it as a jump suit instead, and with higher heels and see a much more flattering look on her short height that would make a huge difference to her whole body. She’s wearing low heels, like she always does and it just to me makes her look so unrefined and unfinished.
‘My friend picked it out, she’s like you. Always following trends and fashion and has an eye for what’s hot.’ She giggles my way and I feel Arrick’s eyes on both of us, silently watching with that unreadable expression. I guess he’s wondering why, after so long being at each other’s throats, I choose now to actually act like a human being towards her. Even I know my whole attitude towards her right now is missing any hints of hostile at all. I sound genuine for once, because I am.
I guess I feel sorry for her, I guess guilt has a part to play, and I guess I can’t really hate someone for being completely in love with Arrick. He’
s easy to fall in love with and I can’t even begin to imagine what it must be like for her right now. Wanting to be normal with him, yet knowing she can’t, wanting to still act like his girlfriend, even though she’s not, yet the feelings are all still there inside of her and she hasn’t actually done anything wrong, to have him break up with her. I have to admit; my heartache and pangs of gnawing ache right now are all for her, and the situation she never asked for.
Arrick drinks from his bottle, giving off subtle vibes that he doesn’t feel completely at ease, Nathan making small talk over my head at him and I just take a moment to look at Natasha, hovering still and she smiles at me. Not a bitchy, ‘back off’ or anything kind of smile. But a genuine ‘thank you for being nice to me and not embarrassing me when I came over’, that makes me feel like an absolute asshole in that very moment. I feel compelled to say something, while he’s engrossed in a conversation and seems to be avoiding talking to her at all.
‘So, you still working at the hospital?’ I ask her warily, not sure why I am even doing this whole talking thing, she would leave a lot quicker if I ignored her right now; glancing at Arrick and catching the little frowns and signals he throws my way.
He’s confused, hell, I’m confused.
‘Yeah. I am. I love working there, although it gets hard at times. I’m just glad I’m not down in the ER anymore, that was hell on earth and instead, I’m just nursing in the paediatrics ward now. I love babies.’ She seems relieved to have a reason to still linger, glancing his way every few seconds and it’s obvious she is desperate to get some sort of eye contact or response from him. I can almost sense her desperation to touch him while he is so close and that lump in my stomach expands tenfold. I feel like an absolute callous shithead that I am the reason she’s even in this kind of pain, it’s a sobering slap in my face and I feel completely uncomfortable with all these new wimpy feelings I am having over her.
The Carrero Heart - Beginning: Arrick and Sophie. (The Carrero Series Book 4) Page 35