The prize (for John) being the chance to distract Kevin Kazan so Ricardo could take the win.
Hopefully Marlene hadn’t been exaggerating about Ricardo’s chances. It appeared she’d been correct so far about the physical nature of the upcoming challenge. Huge circus props were arranged the length of the back lawn, too many to cover with a tarp for a dramatic reveal. It was the type of setup an animal trainer might use—platforms and hoops and a giant ball. But given that the magicians hadn’t even been allowed to use power tools, it was unlikely they’d be coaxing any big cats through the performance. Or even house cats, for that matter.
At one end of each course was a pegboard full of pegs. The other, a fiberglass tiger with a roaring, open mouth.
No, there wouldn’t be any real animals. Just the magicians. And whatever ridiculous task the producers had dreamt up.
The lighting director selected the best spot to have the contestants stand while the sound men miked Monty. Gold Team was pointing and whispering, trying to work out what the challenge might be. John might break the ice with Jia and Faye since he liked them well enough, but they were both wound up tight with the knowledge that one of them was going home.
And, John realized, he knew which teammate that would be…if Marlene had been steering him right, anyway. Because Marlene wouldn’t have suggested he make romantic overtures toward someone who was leaving.
Interesting.
Once the futzing and positioning and throat-clearing was complete, cameras rolled, and Monty donned his on-camera smile and said, “Greetings, Gold Team. Red Team. As you know, circuses are home to many types of entertainers: clowns and acrobats, jugglers and side shows. Another staple beneath the big top is, of course, the magician—and many of you should feel right at home. Welcome, Magicians, to Circus Week.”
The closest John had come to performing in a circus was the county fair. And that was a standard close-up coin and rope act. Judging by the unenthused looks on the faces of the rest of his team, none of them possessed circus experience, either. Not that it would matter. The stunts’ themes were usually tacked-on, flimsy at best.
Although if any juggling were to be involved…John allowed himself a momentary glimpse of Ricardo, who would surely come out ahead in that case. Ricardo had his arm around Sue, who was whispering in his ear. Ah. Yes. The golden couple.
John supposed their closeness could be presented as romantic, even without any clever edits.
He looked away before his own interest could be filmed, and edited into anything it was not. John had no doubt they could dig up some jealousy music readily enough.
“Many great magicians,” Monty said, “use animals in their acts, creatures as harmless as rabbits and doves, as common as trained horses or dogs, and as exotic as elephants and lions. The animal you’ll be training for this stunt is a Bengal tiger.”
“Get some closeups of the fiberglass tigers when we’re through here,” Iain told an assistant, who jotted it on a clipboard.
Monty paused to give the editors somewhere to cut, then went on. “Training is achieved through patience and repetition, modeling the behavior you wish the animal to perform, and then rewarding him with plenty of treats. Today, each team will ‘train’ their tiger.
“First, you’ll model the behavior by running the course yourself. Jump from platform to platform, leap through the flaming hoop, and roll the ball across the white line.”
The three round platforms were close enough for an easy jump, the hoop’s “flames” were yellow mylar streamers, and the ball looked to be a red spray-painted yoga ball with a few gold stars stenciled on.
“Next, secure your tiger’s reward, and run back across the lawn as quickly as you can to ‘feed’ your tiger. The treats are waiting for you inside the pegboard at the far end of the course. Each treat looks the same from this side, but when you pull it from its slot, its ‘flavor’ will be revealed. Green pegs are veggies—worth one point. White pegs are grains—worth two. And brown pegs are meat—worth three whole points. Once you’ve pulled your peg, run back to your tiger as quickly as you can with its treat.”
John glanced at the red-decorated course, and then at the pegboard on the far end. Brown?
Several pegs answered. Yes, yes, yes.
Very good.
“As for the repetition—you’ll do it in the form of a relay race. Only one player at a time may run the team’s course, and at the end of ten minutes, the team who feeds the most points to their tiger will win a critical advantage in the next elimination challenge. So be quick, and take as many trips to the pegboard as you can.”
John considered the pegs again. Brown, brown, brown. Yes.
Monty said, “And…one more thing. You’ll be pulling the treats from their pegboard stash and carrying them back to the tigers…in your mouths.”
Faye gave a quiet grunt of disgust. Kevin sniffed.
“After all,” Monty said brightly, “what better way to bond? Unfortunately, not all the magicians present will have the chance to train these fine beasts. The votes are in from the last elimination challenge. One magician on the Gold Team, and one magician on the Red Team…will be going home.”
Monty turned to the Gold Team. “Math Wizard, Muriel Broom, please step forward.” Gold Team gave its ubiquitous group hug, and then the two older members of the team presented themselves on a piece of tape stuck to the grass. “Bev, you might be going home today. Have you got anything to say about your time in the Mansion?”
“Oh, I, uh…. Nobody told me to prepare a….”
Iain made a “keep going” motion.
Muriel whispered encouragement to Bev, who sighed and shrugged, and then said, “Magic Mansion has been quite an experience, Monty. I’ve come a lot farther than I ever thought I might—me, a fifty-nine year old trigonometry teacher. I’ve had some incredible experiences, and I’ve made a lot of good friends.”
“That you have, Bev. And what about you, Muriel?”
“It’s been a wild ride! Who would’ve ever thought I’d be sleeping in a mansion with a camera crew following me around all day? I’ve crossed at least four things off my bucket list in the past couple of weeks. But if it’s my time to go—no biggie. I’ve been itching to spend some quality time with my boyfriend…if you know what I mean.”
Iain went a bit green.
Monty turned to the Red Team. “Jia Lee, Amazing Faye, please step forward.”
In a sudden burst of compassion, John patted Faye on the shoulder. She shot a slightly confused look back at him as she stepped up to her tape mark.
“Jia,” Monty said, “if this is your last day in the Mansion, what have you got to say?”
“I’m a fierce competitor, Monty, and I gave every challenge my best shot. I was also a team player. I have no regrets.”
Team player? Whose expense was that dig meant to be…ah. Faye was turning redder than her hair. John had assumed they were allies. But perhaps alliances could only take the magicians so far.
“Amazing Faye? Any final words?”
“I want to win, Monty—and anyone who tells you anything different is lying through their teeth. We’re not here to have fun and make friends. This is a game, and we’re all playing it to win. Every last one of us. Red Team, Gold Team, it doesn’t make any difference. I am here to be crowned the Grandmaster Magician, and the color of my medallion doesn’t change that.”
“Strong words, Faye. Unfortunately…you will not take the Grandmaster Magician title. You have been voted out of the mansion. And you’ll be going…home.”
It did indeed seem, thus far, that Marlene had been telling John the truth.
Chapter 27
TIGER TRAINER CHALLENGE
Faye tore off her Red Team medallion and flung it to the ground in what, John assumed, was a melodramatic display designed to get the best screen time out of her few remaining seconds. But then she turned and said to Jia, “I’m soooo disappointed I won’t be running around with a mouthful of painted pegs
. Make sure the cameras get your best angle while you make a big ass out of yourself.”
Jia crossed her arms coolly and said, “Have a nice trip…home.”
As Faye stalked off the set, Iain followed, begging her to go say goodbye to Kevin. But he would be as likely to stop a speeding freight train. “Oh well,” he told his assistant. “See if we can shoot a private goodbye later, once she’s calmed down. Okay, Monty, go ahead.”
“Gold Team, I’m sorry to say, the player who has been eliminated…is Muriel.”
Another group hug ensued…a very long hug. Long enough that John expected Iain to yell something charming like, “Break it up, we don’t have all day.”
Except that he didn’t. He just watched, while the handhelds circled. And when Muriel finally pulled free from the embrace of her team, she was smiling—but her teammates were all in tears. Ricardo, crying freely. Bev with her glasses off, wiping them on the hem of her blouse. Sue with mascara making twin tracks down her cheeks.
“I love you guys,” Muriel said, walking backwards with the dry wind whipping her gypsy skirts and her long gray hair as she blew them all elaborate kisses. “Remember—Gold Team rules! Now go kick some ass!”
Once Muriel exited the set, the contestants were situated by their fake tigers while a pair of stylists repaired the damage to Sue’s makeup. Kevin, Jia and John studied the course. John rehearsed the moves in his mind: jump, jump, jump. The hoop would be the trickiest part for him, because of his height. But he was also a fast runner. He’d do well on the straightaway return trip. “A’ight,” Kevin said, “I’ll go first, y’all can watch, and plan your strategy.”
Jia shrugged. John wondered if by helping the Red Team win, he was stacking the deck in favor of keeping himself around, or making it more likely that Ricardo would get voted off in the next elimination. He didn’t know. But if Ricardo was as popular as Marlene had said, he stood less of a chance of being voted off. Plus, John would feel insulted if he knew Ricardo was holding back on his account; wouldn’t Ricardo feel the same? And so John set his sights on a brown peg, and he said to Jia, “I’ll go next, if you don’t mind.”
She shrugged.
An assistant came around with clear mouthguards for all of them to wear, two individual pieces, top and bottom. John bit them into place. They tasted terrible.
“How’m I supposed to grab a peg with this hunka plastic in my mouth?” Kevin complained to Iain.
“Take it up with Marlene. She’s worried you klutzes will knock your teeth out.”
“What difference does it make?” Jia said, muffled through the plastic. “We’re all wearing them. Everyone will have trouble. Not just you.”
Not to be outdone by a girl, Kevin pressed his mouthguards in, crossed his arms, and waited for the signal. An assistant brought Monty an airhorn, which he raised above his head, blasted, and cried, “And you’re off!”
Sue started for the Gold Team. She raced through the course, athletic and strong, while Ricardo and Bev cheered her on.
John, however, kept his eye on his teammate as Kevin navigated the obstacles. He wasn’t a very surefooted jumper, though his hours of inclined crunches had given him a certain amount of physical control. Three jumps across the platforms, through the hoop, roll the ball, and a head-first lunge into the pegboard. Even from where John stood twenty yards away, he saw the flash of white Kevin held between his mouthguards. He’d found a two-point peg.
So, however, had Sue.
Jia elbowed John in the ribs, and whispered, “Cheer.”
John supposed he should. He clapped his hands and called out, “Come on, let’s go, almost there!” While Jia yelled, “Whooo!”
The moment Kevin spat his white peg into the tiger’s mouth, John was off.
The Gold Team had sent Ricardo second, and Ricardo was already at the hoop. Apparently Sue was quite the runner. She’d put her team in the lead already. John didn’t waste any time watching Ricardo—he focused only on himself. Three jumps—there, easy. Through the hoop, with mylar streamers tickling his cheeks. Roll the ball…and then, the pegs.
Brown?
Yes.
He grasped a brown peg in his teeth and ran back toward his tiger, fast enough to begin closing the gap between the Gold and Red Teams. He spat his peg into the tiger’s mouth, and then Jia took off.
Jia was small, but she was fast and agile. The jumps were no problem, and she made it through the hoop much faster than either Kevin or John. Her opponent, Bev…was not quite so dexterous. And that was putting it kindly.
It appeared that Bev was afraid to make the short jump between the platforms, despite the desperate “you can do it” cheers of her teammates. She moved between them with large, cautious steps instead, and rather than jumping through the hoop, she climbed through it one foot at a time.
Jia was already back to the Red Team’s tiger by the time Bev reached the pegboard. Kevin took off.
Gasping for breath, Jia took out her top mouthguard and said, “I could tell that damn thing was green. I could see it past my nose. If I get another green peg, I’m gonna spit it out and take a different one.”
“They didn’t say we could do that.” John cautioned.
“They didn’t say we couldn’t.”
John didn’t like the risk. “Don’t give them a reason to disqualify us.”
“There’s no rule against it.” Jia scowled at the obstacle course. “And to do that whole circuit for just one damn point? I don’t think so.”
Kevin was running back with a one-point green peg in his mouth. John told Jia, “Don’t risk it,” and focused hard on the jump to the first platform. He was ahead of Ricardo now—Bev’s slowness had cost the Gold Team any advantage Sue’s speed had initially won them. Three jumps, through the hoop, roll the ball…and dare he take another brown? There were fewer brown pegs than the others…but not so few that it would be terribly suspicious of John to take a second brown. He seized the three-point peg from the top row with his teeth. That left one in place lower down on the board for Jia. It was tempting to simply point it out to her to keep her from spitting out pegs and costing the Red Team a potential penalty.
But since John wouldn’t be able to explain how he’d come by the information, he supposed he would need to let the cards fall where they may.
As soon as he spat his peg into the tiger’s mouth, Jia was off, and Ricardo, who’d been neck and neck before with John, was only now turning away from the Gold Team pegboard. He had a brown three-point peg in his teeth. He raced back as Jia leapt through her hoop and bit a peg from the Red Team’s board.
And spat it out.
“Crazy-assed chick,” Kevin muttered, through his mouthguard. “What she doin’?”
Jia spat another, and another, and finally settled on the fourth peg she’d chosen. She turned to run back, and John saw she’d decided to keep a two-point white.
John eyed Iain on the sidelines, a cellphone on each ear in a heated discussion with his unseen superiors. Evidently the producers weren’t the only ones who knew how to deliver a twist.
Jia returned and Kevin was off yet again as the timer ticked past the midway point. Over on Gold Team, Ricardo spat his brown peg into the tiger’s mouth, then looked up to watch Kevin bang through the hoop, while on his own team, Bev struggled across the platforms. Just as Kevin lunged for the pegs, a dry wind kicked up and engulfed him in dust. He doubled over, knuckling at his contact lenses, and Iain paused in his multi-phone conversation. “You need a medic?”
Kevin straightened up and blinked away tears, and then shook his head and barked out, “I’m good.” But the momentary lapse had allowed Bev to catch up to him. The hairs on the back of John’s neck prickled, and he turned to see Ricardo watching Kevin’s struggle with a self-satisfied smile.
At least this slip-up wasn’t as obvious as the mylar dove. Though calling it a slip-up was probably quite a stretch.
Kevin grasped a peg and turned toward his team. The peg was green. Bev b
egan her laborious jog back to her tiger with a two-point white peg in her mouth.
“If they disqualify your pegs,” John told Jia, “then that’s it. We lose.”
“And how is that different from every other challenge?”
She had a point.
Bev was no sprinter, and despite the momentary reprieve the dust cloud had given the Gold Team, Kevin outpaced her easily. John glanced over at Ricardo, who was giving Sue a pep talk as she readied herself for her third circuit. Ricardo caught John’s eye and gave a slight shrug—busted. It was time for John to run again before he could come up with a response.
Jump, jump, jump, clear the hoop, roll the ball. Sue had grasped a peg and was on her way back, running hard, when suddenly she went sprawling. Monty’s voice, saying, “Sue is down!” rose over the collective indrawn breath of everyone who’d seen what happened, but Iain called out, “keep going,” and so John left Sue to the care of the medics, stepped up to the pegboard and located yet another brown. How suspicious would it look if he took a third brown peg? Maybe he should settle for green this time…but without knowing whether Jia’s pegs would count or not, could he risk losing yet another challenge? In John’s pause, Sue must have made it back to her starting line, and the sound of Ricardo leaping from platform to platform with unerring accuracy and speed rang through the yard.
John grasped a brown peg and ran back toward the tiger.
“That’s nine points Professor Topaz scored for Red Team!” Monty cried. So much for flying under the radar.
Jia was hopping the platforms as Kevin readied himself in case he might be able to make one more circuit—though the timer now had less than thirty seconds to go. Jia made it to the pegboard, spat out a green peg, and kept the second peg she’d chosen. John saw it was a brown.
Kevin looked back over his shoulder at John. His eyes were red. “Wanna tell me where the other browns are?”
John stared at him blankly.
“No? You sure? ’Cos you don’t wanna mess wit’ me, old man.”
“It’s random,” John said calmly. But Kevin didn’t buy it. He gave a derisive scoff, then set off for yet another leap through the course as Jia brought home a brown.
Magic Mansion Page 23