“Then I suggest you prepare yourself for a whole new life. You can do this, Charlie. If anyone can succeed, it’s you. I believe in you.”
I wiped tears from beneath my eyes, then cleared my throat. “Thanks, Dad.”
We hung up a couple minutes later, and I stared at the mess that was my room. Truthfully, I didn’t want another job at another firm or company. My heart wouldn’t be in it. All I wanted was to see the housing project through to the end, and I couldn’t do that without help.
Hearing my dad’s voice brought back vivid memories of our struggles back when I was a kid. Eating Ramen. Wearing clothes from half price day at the Goodwill. Sleeping in our rusted mini-van. He’d given up everything to give me a better future, sacrificed his own happiness and second chances, and this was an opportunity for me to step up and be the hero for families like ours.
I stared at the phone in my hand. I swiped, then tapped through to his number, took a deep breath and pushed the call button. It rang three times, and each ring brought me closer to hanging up. My heart pounded, and a thin veil of perspiration settled on my brow. Would he answer? Did he care? The nerves built to a fever pitch, and I had to gulp breaths to stay calm and steady.
Maybe he wouldn’t pick up. Then it would be over. Truly over.
“Charlie?” Nolan’s velvety voice curled my insides into a tight, hot ball.
“Hi, Nolan. Thanks for taking my call. Don’t read too much into this, I just, ugh, we need to meet for lunch. Face to face. Are you free today?” I bit my bottom lip until the white-hot pain lanced through me. Butterflies accosted the lining of my stomach. Damn this man and the things he made me feel. Emotions I’d never asked for or ever wanted to possess overtook my conservative senses. I had to release their chains. I had to be stronger.
“Of course. I’d do anything for you, Charlie.” Nolan whispered, his voice containing a tiny hitch of emotion. “It hurts me that you don’t know that al–”
“I just want to talk about Raminsky and the project,” I rushed to cut him off. Correct him. “Not about us. What we can do to get such an important project moving forward, you know? Since it will help so many people.”
“I know how important it is to you, so I’d be honored to meet for lunch and see if we can join forces. Let’s hit Gramercy Tavern at noon. I’ll send a car to pick you up.”
“No, that’s okay. I can find it myself,” I replied, a last bit of defiance against having to turn back to him for help, even if it was for work. “See you in a couple hours.” I hung up without saying goodbye, then dropped the phone to the bed.
My errant emotions had just led me down the wrong road again.
Chapter 8
Charlie
The Gramercy Tavern’s windows were huge and looked out on the street where a slew of paps had gathered. They snapped pictures of Nolan and me, sitting at a round wooden table near the back of the restaurant. Didn’t the vultures have more important people to harass? It must be a slow news day.
“Don’t worry, they won’t come closer than that. Even wild animals have their limits,” Nolan said, grasping his tall glass of beer. He chugged the golden fluid down, then set it back on the table. I tore my eyes away from the muscles of his sculpted neck. “They know better than to bite the hand that feeds them. If they cross the line, my family can end their careers. And they know it.”
I’d ordered a warm lobster salad, only because it would’ve been rude to tell him I didn’t want anything that passed my lips to be paid for by his damn dirty money.
A waitress stopped to check on us and made eyes at Nolan, but he ignored her. His gaze was glued to my face. As if he’d just crossed an arid desert and my features had formed an oasis. Every time that happened, I clenched tight in the right places in spite of a valiant effort to keep the desire at bay. Heat had built between us already. A rising flame that stoked to a blazing inferno within the space of minutes. He hadn’t touched me in weeks, but each look was a caress. A claiming.
“It’s good to see you again, Charlie,” he said, leaning back in his chair and sighing.
That whisper of my name sent tingling through my core. It reminded me of whispered promises, his skin against mine, wet bubbles in the bath. Full lips seeking, tasting, taking.
“I told you, Nolan. This is strictly a business meeting.” I lifted a glass of wine, then tasted the deep red merlot, swirling it on my tongue. Business or not, I’d need the booze to bolster my defenses.
“Right, business.” He frowned as if I’d hurt his feelings. “You still want to go through with the housing project. That means you want to come back to work for Banks Realty.” Nolan was being presumptuous. He’d drawn himself upright in his chair and straightened his suit jacket, as if my employment was a foregone conclusion.
“Yes, I want to see the project through, but no, I won’t be working for Banks Realty again.” I brushed my hair behind my ear and tucked it there. I hadn’t dressed up for the meeting, opting instead for a professional, tight knee-length skirt and a plain silk blouse that complemented my curves. Who was I kidding? I’d dressed for him. As if some siren had overtaken my body.
“Then how can this work, Charlie?” he asked, his eyes narrowed. “I’m really confused.”
“Any pregnancy scares lately?” Anger had welled up inside me, a raging geyser fueled by the constant desire to reach out and grab him from across the table. I didn’t want to ache for Nolan this way, but I did. My heart ripped apart and my soul died a little death. Because deep down, I wanted him to admit that he hadn’t been with another woman. That he still wanted me.
“Nope. Unless you have something you want to tell me?” Nolan’s wry smile drove the anger and confusion up another notch.
“Classy,” I replied. “Thanks for that.”
“You started it, Charlie.”
The waitress returned with our food, my warm lobster salad and his duck, and I stalled by scooping up a tentative bite. The spices exploded across my tongue. Delicious. The tavern’s food and atmosphere was on point – the exact opposite to my confused feelings for this handsome, charming human being. I wondered if I’d ever feel like myself around Nolan or if I’d always be a discombobulated mass of confused emotion.
Nolan placed his fork and knife in his plate and cupped his hands together, placing his elbows on the table and balancing his chin on top of his knuckles. “I have the money to employ you, you know that. We haven’t replaced you as Legal Director. So what’s the problem?”
Of course he didn’t understand the problem. I wanted to scream that I was too far in, that I was in love with him and that marrying him for a project would be a cop out. It would sacrifice every ounce of my dignity and self-respect until I was nothing but a thin shell of Charlene. And that was unacceptable. I wouldn’t lose myself in a man. I couldn’t.
“I’m not interested in returning to my former position,” I admitted. “And I have no interest in a fake relationship of any kind. I want us to go to Raminsky and propose something else.”
“Like what?” Nolan asked. “I doubt he’ll go for anything other than–”
“Get that out of your head, Banks. You and I will never be married. And we’ll never have sex again either,” I said. “Let’s get that out of the way straight out of the gate. Do I make myself clear?”
Those deep, expressive eyes studied me until he finally nodded. A resigned ascent to my flippant and annoyed words. “I understand. But I don’t agree and I won’t lie to you about it.”
“Unlike you, I have some self-control.” Wasn’t that a lie? I’d jumped into bed with him, even though I’d done everything within my power to resist. Blame the insane attraction. Blame insanity. No. I had no one to blame but myself. “We’ll tell Raminsky that we’re trying to forge a friendship, which is true in a sense, and that we still want to go through with the project. That will have to be enough. He trusts me.”
“He doesn’t trust me,” Nolan replied and speared a piece of duck with his fork. “
Not as far as he can throw me. And I doubt he could lift me two inches off the floor.”
I gazed at him evenly. “Yeah, not many people trust you, Nolan. Have you ever wondered why?”
“You’re full of censure today,” he murmured. “I’m not sure I like this new Charlie. She’s not very nice.”
“Good. We’ll go to him after lunch,” I announced, not placating his surly and childish attitude with any validation. Nolan needed to hit bottom before he’d consider change. He needed to realize there was only one person who was always at the scene of the crime.
Him.
“Whatever you say, boss,” Nolan replied, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards into the sexy smile that had disarmed me every time before.
Not this time.
Chapter 9
Nolan
I loved how determined she was. I hated that she used that determination to stay away from me.
How in the hell had I allowed this to happen? I’d never had a woman walk away from me before. I walked away from them. For the love of God, it was so damn obvious that we belonged together, but I’d messed up. Charlie was the one. She’d crawled into the small space I still had open in my heart and she lived there now, never to be eradicated. And I’d tried to convince her to put up her feet and stay a while in all the wrong ways. Like trying to force her into marriage instead of inspiring her to want to say, “I do.”
The only thing we had in common now was this project. It was a tenuous thread laced with hope, but it was all I had. And I’d make it work.
I touched the small of her back and guided her toward Raminsky’s office. She didn’t shrug away from me this time but sighed and leaned into the touch for a second. It was a start. I took the opportunity to trace circles against her silk blouse, using my thumb to tease the fabric, relishing the softness while imagining her even softer skin underneath.
Charlie seemed to catch herself and pulled away. “Remember what I said, Banks,” she hissed.
What was up with the last name? When she finally called me Nolan again, I’d know I’d gotten through to her.
Raminsky’s door opened, and he stood in the frame, both eyebrows raised. “I didn’t expect to see you two here again so soon. I can’t imagine there’s much more to discuss.”
“We can’t stay away,” I replied, a throaty chuckle ripping through my chest. Knowing my godfather like I did, teasing and levity were my best bets until I could get him to loosen up. But Charlie’s smile was noticeably absent today. And every day I’d seen her since she’d left me stranded in the Florida Keys.
She extended a hand to clasp Raminsky’s, but instead, he pulled her into a tight embrace before letting her go and holding her at arm’s length. “Does this mean you two have sorted out your differences? Can I expect another wedding invite in the mail?”
“E-mail is the chosen method nowadays,” I replied. “Unless you’re Anne Banks. Most of us don’t want to waste all that expensive parchment. Not good for the environment.”
“No, we’re not back together. It’s, uh, it’s complicated.” Charlie licked her luscious lips as she ignored my diatribe about recycling.
That gesture alone almost doubled me over with desire. Fuck, she was irresistible. Intelligent, passionate, the perfect woman. And I couldn’t have her.
Nolan Banks fucks up again. The Times would have utilized that exact headline long ago in honor of your latest escapade if it could have made it past the FCC, you ignorant dipshit.
“It always is,” Raminsky said, stepping back to allow us entrance to his office. I strode in and took a seat beside Charlie, barely managing to keep my hands to myself. My godfather continued, “Mrs. Raminsky seems to remind me of that quite often.”
Her thighs were hidden by that skirt, but the tightness didn’t leave much to the imagination, outlining her perfect moon-shaped ass. I wanted to get through to her again in physical ways. In every way.
Raminsky shut his office door and circled around the desk. He took a seat at last, then rocked back and forth in the massive black leather chair that peered above his head.
“What can I do for you two?” he asked, leaning back and tenting his fingers as if praying. Probably praying for me to pull my head out of my ass for once.
“We really want your support on Grant, Robert,” Charlie said. “We’ll do anything to get it. Nolan and I have our problems, but we want to work on that–”
“The engagement was a fake,” I blurted out.
Both of them turned to me, jaws dropped. Raminsky blinked rapidly, trying to process the biggest news he’d had in years.
“What did you say?” he muttered, incredulous. His already ruddy complexion turning a deep shade of scarlet.
“Don’t, Nolan, don’t.” Charlie buried her face in her hands for about ten seconds, and when her eyes finally searched and met mine, hers had glazed over with moisture.
Shit. I’d made her cry.
“It’s the truth, and I have to come clean. I’ve had numerous run-ins with my mother this week, and it’s really gotten to me, Robert. I don’t want to be like her. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s that. No more manipulating everyone to get what I want. I don’t want to be that guy anymore. A caricature without purpose except to the paparazzi.”
Charlie opened her mouth to interrupt, but I held up a hand, silently pleading with her to let me finish.
“We lied to you,” I confessed, looking directly into the older man’s eyes. “And I’m ashamed. Actually, I started the lie. I forced Charlie into an engagement with me to get you to believe that I was mature enough to handle this project. I blindsided her that night of the ball.”
I looked at Charlie. The side of her face was visible to me but not much else. A curtain of her hair shaded her from view. Had any of the tears escaped her eyelids to run rivers down her flushed cheeks? God, how I wanted to close the gap and take her in my arms.
“Charlie, I’m sorry for breaking this news now, but he needs to know. I don’t want any more lies between any of us. Never again.”
“I-I don’t know what to say,” Raminsky grumbled, rifling through some paperwork and snorting. I’d never seen Robert struck so speechless before. He usually interrupted me before I finished my sentences.
“I understand if that diminishes your trust in us, but everything we’ve done has been for the good of the project. We were willing to go that far to see it through, but Charlie was the one who realized living this lie wasn’t healthy and wasn’t fair. It’s why she left me in Florida. She has integrity, and she won’t compromise it. Even for Grant.”
Even for me.
“I’m not the hero in this,” Charlie said, snapping her head upright. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and I felt like I’d been punched in the gut with a wrecking ball. Each tiny droplet seemed to poison my soul as surely as if I’d ingested them. “I lied too, and I threw professionalism out the window.”
“And there was another reason I did what I did,” I continued, cutting through her sorrow with my words. Hoping I could soothe her pain.
They both stared at me. Shit, this was the moment of truth. I’d dreamed of telling Charlie all of this ages ago. She could never know the whole truth, but this part was something she needed to hear. It was as if Anne Banks had injected me with sodium pentothal through her verbal barbs that pricked my soul.
Charlie needed to know how I felt about her. And why.
“I want to make this really clear. I’m confessing to the fake engagement and everything that I’ve done wrong to you, Charlie.” I turned in my seat and grasped her hand. She let me hold it though she didn’t squeeze back or put any effort into the grip. It remained limp between us; a glaring reminder of what used to exist but had been taken away by the error of my ways. Could I get it back?
“The housing project–”
“It’s important, yeah, but the reason it’s become important to me is because it means something to you,” I said then took a deep brea
th. “I love you. I love you. I can’t say it enough, and I’ll never get tired of saying it. Charlie de Monaco, I fucking love you.”
“Nolan,” she said, her chest shuddering up and down.
Raminsky’s eyes were round as ashtrays. Apparently, this was a lot of information to handle during a short span of time. Hopefully, Charlie would take it better than he did.
“I’ll never hide from you again,” I said. “I can’t. You’re literally all I think about every day and night. I want you and no one else. You don’t have to marry me, please just give me a chance to prove myself to you. All I’m asking for is a sliver of hope.”
“I, uh, I don’t know what to say,” Charlie said and set her jaw. Rigid. Unyielding. My heart fell to my loafers. “I won’t say yes just so we can get the project. I respect Robert, and I’ll never withhold information from him again.”
“It’s not the project,” I promised. “I want you. It’s always been you.”
Raminsky cleared his throat, then rose from his seat. “I think you two should have this conversation in private. Thank you for telling me the truth. It’s clear to me that you have the maturity to handle this project, Nolan, and that you would go to any length to see it succeed, Charlie. So, yes, you have my backing. And my blessing if that makes a difference.”
Chapter 10
Charlie
Nolan walked me downstairs and stood beside his limo. He held the door open and stared me down, challenging me to turn my back on him and walk away. He was hardheaded and brave, but vulnerable at the same time. And he’d never looked more beautiful. In his presence, I felt raw and vulnerable.
“I need to go home,” I said and stumbled towards his limo. “Will you take me home? Please?”
I couldn’t process what he’d said now, and it felt imperative that I be alone to digest what just happened. The shocking and illicit revelations of the past hour. I wanted to believe it was true with every fiber of my being, but there was still the slightest chance that it might’ve been a show to soften Robert to The Grant Project. Nolan was so used to manipulating situations and people to get his way, I wasn’t sure if he was capable of transparency.
Bait: Alpha Billionaire Romance Boxed Set Page 20