“Never,” I said, smiling. “You’re out of here.”
She looked at me. “You understand, then. I think we’ve about run our course.”
I nodded. “What will you do?”
She brightened. “I’m pretty mobile, as you know. I’ll move back next week. The new job will be good for my career. And it’ll put me four hours closer to my mom down in Georgia.”
It was quiet for a few seconds as I considered what she was saying. “Wow, Jen,” I said, shaking my head, leaning back against my pillow, digesting this.
She smiled at me. She really was pretty. “I want you to know that I had a wonderful few weeks with you, Danny,” she said. “I won’t forget them. You’re a pretty amazing guy. And I’ll be coming back from time to time. I’m gonna check in on you. If you’re still single, maybe we can hang out some more.”
I smiled and nodded.
She looked at me for a few long seconds.
“But if I’m any judge of things, you won’t be. You’ve got somebody pretty special waiting for you. You’d better not blow it.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know,” I said, “I’ll miss you, Jen—that much I do know.”
She nodded, and then she leaned forward and kissed me. She smiled, her eyes welling up with tears.
“You’re a lucky man, Danny Logan. Take care of yourself.” She turned and walked away. I listened to the clack-clack-clack of her heels slowly receding as she disappeared down the hallway.
Chapter 27
I LET OUT a heavy sigh and stared at the ceiling. I’d been dumped by girls several times in the past. Sometimes, it hurt. Sometimes, not so much. Sometimes it was more of a relief than anything. This time, oddly, I felt a little of all of these things. I was still thinking about this when Toni walked back into the room.
“Jennifer stopped by the cafeteria and told me she was all done,” she said.
“That was nice of her.”
“Yeah.” Toni paused, and then she said,“She also said she was moving to Washington, D.C.”
I nodded. “Yep.”
“Washington, D.C. How do you feel about that?” she asked.
I shrugged. “Mixed, I guess.”
“Mixed?”
“I don’t know. Jen and I had an odd kind of relationship, as you’ve been quick to point out in the past. And it’s weird—you’d probably expect a manly man like myself to think that a relationship that was all sex and no emotions would be a dream gig.”
She rolled her eyes.
“Exactly,” I said. “But I think I’ve found out it doesn’t work that way.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, the whole point of the no-commitment-friends-with-benefits-type relationship is that it’s not supposed to have any strings, right? No costs. But I can tell you, that’s all fucked up. It has plenty of costs, believe me.”
She looked at me but didn’t speak, so I continued. “If you’re both decent people, feelings grow and develop between you—even if that wasn’t the original intent.”
“You’re saying you have feelings for Jennifer?” she asked.
“Yeah, of course I do—she’ll always be a friend—more than a friend, even. You might call it friends-with-history. And because she’s a friend, it hurts that she’s leaving, yeah.So there’s a cost that I didn’t expect. You can turn on that kind of friends-with-benefits relationship pretty easy, but turning it off isn't so easy and it's likely to hurt.”
She nodded.
I looked outside for a minute, and then I said,“But I guess that’s just part of the problem. Jen and I don’t line up, and we both recognize this.”
“What does that mean?”
“Line up? Look, you can put two people together—almost any two decent people—and they can become friends. That’s what’s happened with Jen and me. We became friends.”
She nodded.
“But the bigger thing is,” I continued, “it takes two special people—people who fit together just right—to line up perfectly so they can become more than friends. Like I said, Jen and I aren’t there. We never were, and we never would be. It’s not happening. And the problem is that the relationship she and I had can get in the way of some bigger, more important things.”
“Like what?”
“Things like her career, for example. Or even more important,” I looked up at Toni, “things like forming a relationship with someone you do line up with.”
She looked at me for a few seconds, and then she turned away and sighed. “Do you really believe that exists?”she asked. “That there’s someone special who you line up with?”
“Toni,” I said softly. She turned and looked back at me. “For me?Definitely. I know there’s someone. And I’ve handled it badly. And I’m sorry.”
She bit her lower lip and looked into my eyes. Neither of us spoke for a moment.
Then I continued. “I’ve been thinking that for the past four years, every good memory I have— every damn one of ’em—has you in it some way or another. And when you were gone—when Marlowe took you, I lost it. I controlled it on the outside, thank God. But inside, I was a wreck. I hate to say it, but I think the thought of losing you made me realize how important you are to me—how much you really mean to me.”
She looked at me and smiled. “Why do you hate to say that?”
“Because it shouldn’t have taken the threat of losing you to make me realize how good I’ve had it with you around. I’ve been a complete idiot. When I think back on it, I realize I've been fooling myself for a long time and I don't want to do that anymore. I hope you feel the same way, but as for me, I don’t want to be without you anymore. I think we have something special.”
Then she leaned over and tenderly kissed me on the forehead. “I think you got hit on the head harder than you think you did, Danny Logan,” she said.
She started to pull back, but I reached up and put my hand behind her shoulder. She stopped.
“I didn’t get hit that hard,” I said. I pulled her back, and for the first time ever, I kissed Toni Blair. I kissed her long and gentle and deep—not on the forehead. I kissed her and my whole world turned—right then and there, lying on a hospital bed at Harborview Medical Center. My heart raced, and I felt woozy all over again. My vital signs must have gone off the friggin’ chart.
When we stopped, she fell against me, and we held each other tightly. She trembled in my arms.
“Told you,” I whispered to her as I buried my face in her hair.
I felt her tears on my neck. “Oh, my God,” she said softly. “Oh, my God.”
Epilogue
April 16, 2012
11:05 a.m.
JOAQUIN “DOC” KIAHTEL leaned back in a folding recliner chair, contemplating his future. He’d made camp at Kalaloch in the Olympic National Park, just north of the Quinault Reservation, on a wooded bluff overlooking the beach at the edge of the Pacific Ocean. The day was bright and sunny—not normal for this time of year. Doc took this as a good sign.
Usually, he avoided touristy-type campgrounds like Kalaloch, but he also knew that if you wanted to camp on the ocean, Kalaloch was the best game in town. And today, Doc wanted to be on the ocean.
The ocean breeze flowing off the water and up the bluff was cool, despite the sunny day. Doc flipped his collar up and pulled his jacket around him. He watched the seagulls soaring along the ridgeline above the bluff. Far out on the water, he could see a ship steaming north, preparing to round Cape Flattery before heading to the Puget Sound. This is about as far away from the Chiricahua Reservation as an Apache boy from central New Mexico can get, he thought. Not that he was running or hiding. Just the opposite, in fact. Now, it was about time to stop running and hiding. He was planning on coming out.
Big changes coming, he thought. I’ve kept to myself for sixyears, ever since Dot got killed. No more.
No man knows what tomorrow brings, but I know what makes me happy today. I’m not going to hide it anymore. Kenny will tease me
, but that’s his problem. Danny and Toni won’t, especially not now. They are all friends—even Kenny. Family.
Doc heard a rustling sound coming from his tent. He turned just as a tall, striking, dark-haired woman stepped out. She smiled at him, and Doc felt his heart leap in the same way it had when he’d first seen Dr. Prita Dekhlikiseh six months ago when he went to the Swedish Medical Center for his annual physical. Apache women in Seattle were about as rare as Apache men, so the two of them had been naturally drawn together. Now, Doc and Pri were inseparable, although Doc had told no one—not even Danny. This was soon to change.
“Hey,” she said, walking toward him. “What time are they supposed to be here?”
“Toni said they’d get here by noon.”
“And you haven’t told them about me?”
“Nope. Trust me. They’re gonna be surprised.”
“I’m a little nervous about meeting them,” Pri said. “They’re basically your family, you know.”
Doc smiled. “They are family. You don’t have to be nervous about meeting Danny and Toni.”
She looked out over the ocean. “It’s beautiful, Doc.” she said. “You got room for two?”
Doc nodded and pointed to the other chair. “Right here,” he said. “Sit down with me. Let me show you the ocean.”
* * * *
Author’s Notes
The cryptologicaltechnology described in No Way to Die exists essentially as I’ve described it—except, of course, thatthere’s no Starfire Protocol and there’s no LILLYPAD (if there is, no one's talking). The underlying technology for both of these devices, though, is real and works as presented. Asymmetrical-key technology remains the prevailing encryption technology in use today. There’s speculation that someday, someone will figure out a way to factor the large numbers involved—just like Thomas Rasmussen did in No Way to Die. When this happens, maybe someone will have also figured out how to solve the inherent problems connected to single-pad encryption technology. Single-pad has been around for more than one hundred years. Of course, the companies in No Way to Die—Applied Cryptographic Solutions and Madoc Secured Technologies—are products of my imagination.
The medical technology involved in rendering a person completely incapacitated also exists. In fact, stun guns, Tasers, and stun wands can be purchased online at dozens of retail outlets.
Which leads to an interesting thought: hopefully, the Feds weren’t monitoring my website-browsing patterns while I worked on No Way to Die. With all my research into explosives, paralyzing agents, stun guns, cryptology, and the like, I could be in real trouble.
Acknowledgments
No Way to Die required a great deal of research and specialized information, which I was fortunate to obtain through the efforts of the following people.
To Dr. John Kremer, for helping me understand the physiological effects of electroshock weapons, including the telltale aftereffects.
To Officer Tony Falso of the Mukilteo Police Department, for his detailed critique of the police procedures used throughout the story. Any remaining procedural errors are mine alone.
To Gabe Robinson, for helping to identify and bring out the real story hidden in the jumble of words that was my original effort.
To Brynn Warriner and Carrie Wicks, for helping me take what I (mistakenly) hoped was a finished manuscript to a manuscript that now really is finished—a humbling but necessary experience. Both Brynn and Carrie work in Seattle, and they also provided sound advice and assistance on specifics of the novel’s Seattle setting.
To Ellen Johnson, Casey Jacobs, and Dennis Doppe, for reading early versions of No Way to Die and providing valuable feedback.
Finally, as always, to my wife, Michelle, for her constant support in this and all my other endeavors.
Table of Contents
Welcome
Dedication
Prologue
Part One
Chapter 1 Mondays are my . . .
Chapter 2 Whenever my dad . . .
Chapter 3 We arrived at . . .
Chapter 4 At Logan PI . . .
Chapter 5 When we walked . . .
Chapter 6 I called Kenny . . .
Chapter 7 The next morning . . .
Chapter 8 While we were . . .
Chapter 9 I'd like to . . .
Chapter 10 I was still . . .
Chapter 11 After our meeting . . .
Chapter 12 I didn't want . . .
Chapter 13 I live about . . .
Chapter 14 I was running.
Part Two
Chapter 15 I stared at . . .
Chapter 16 The Seattle headquarters . . .
Chapter 17 Hey! What are . . .
Chapter 18 With Toni gone . . .
Chapter 19 The meeting broke . . .
Part Three
Chapter 20 "Shit!" I said.
Chapter 21 My alarm beeped . . .
Chapter 22 The sun actually . . .
Chapter 23 It's always an . . .
Chapter 24 I felt the . . .
Chapter 25 We heard the . . .
Part Four
Chapter 26 I woke up . . .
Chapter 27 I let out . . .
Epilogue
Author’s Notes
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Other Books by M.D. Grayson
Copyright
About the Publisher
About the Author
M.D. Grayson is the author of the Danny Logan mystery series, which includes (so far) Angel Dance and No Way to Die. He lives on an island near Seattle with his wife, Michelle, and their three German shepherds.
Before becoming a full-time writer, Mr. Grayson worked in the construction industry as an accountant for six l-o-n-g weeks (square peg–round hole) and as a piano player on the Las Vegas strip. When he’s not writing, he loves zooming about on two wheels—bicycles and motorcycles alike. In addition, he’s a pilot, a boater, and an accomplished musician—always ready for a jam session!
Connect online:
Blog: http://www.mdgrayson.com
Twitter: http://twitter.com/md_grayson
Facebook: http://facebook.com/mdgraysonauthorpage
Other books by M.D. Grayson:
In the Danny Logan series debut, beautiful Seattle business heiress Gina Fiore has vanished without a trace. Desperate for help, her family turns to Danny Logan, Gina’s former boyfriend, to find her and bring her home safely. Logan is a fifth-generation Seattle native who owns Logan Private Investigations. Along with his associates Antoinette “Toni” Blair, Kenny Hale, and Joaquin Kiahtel, he accepts the case and begins the hunt for Gina.
Logan and his team dig for clues and soon find that they’re not the only ones looking for Gina. The Tijuana-Mendez drug cartel is keenly interested in her whereabouts, as is the Calabria crime family from Chicago. The race is on to locate Gina—the stakes could not be higher. In order to prevail, Logan’s going to need all the skill and luck he can gather, and he’s going to need to confront the unresolved feelings he still has for Gina—feelings that might just get him killed!
Copyright
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events or locales is entirely coincidental.
No Way to Die
This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you're reading this eBook and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return it and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of the author.
Copyright © 2012 by M.D. Grayson. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book, or portions thereof, in any form. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrie
val system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical without the express written permission of the author. The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book via the Internet or via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal and punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions and do not participate in or encourage electronic piracy of copyrighted materials.
The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party websites or their content.
Cover designed by M.D. Grayson
Cover art:
Copyright © iStockPhoto # 1493255_Foggy Street by Perry Kroll
Visit the author website:
http://www.mdgrayson.com.
ISBN-978-0-9849518-1-9(eBook)
ISBN-978-0-9849518-2-6 (Paperback)
ISBN-978-0-9849518-5-7 (Hard Cover)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2012943015
Version 2012.07.12
About the Publisher
http://www.cedarcoastpress.com
321 High School Road NE, Suite D3, #376
Bainbridge Island, Washington 98110-2648
Table of Contents
Welcome
Dedication
Prologue
Part One
Chapter 1 Mondays are my . . .
Chapter 2 Whenever my dad . . .
Chapter 3 We arrived at . . .
Chapter 4 At Logan PI . . .
Chapter 5 When we walked . . .
Chapter 6 I called Kenny . . .
Chapter 7 The next morning . . .
Chapter 8 While we were . . .
Chapter 9 I'd like to . . .
No Way to Die Page 32