Sage and Sweetgrass

by LoRee Peery

  “As soon as I can’t smell the polyurethane anymore, I’m going to set the vanity in the display window out front.”

  “It’s lovely. Is it dry?”

  At Lanae’s nod, Lezlie set her mug on the workbench. She trilled her hand over the smooth oak finish. “Dad will be pleased. It looks wonderful. I’m into the chrome and Formica, and white-pine look of about fifty years ago. I just couldn’t see this dresser in my home.”

  “Good for Frivolities, then, huh?” With pounding heart, Lanae grew serious. “Did your dad tell you about the letters I found in a hidden drawer?”

  “No way.”

  “Yes, way.” Lanae slid the drawer out then slapped the heel of her hand against her forehead. “Would you believe, I drove all the way to his place and the letters are even now on the front seat of my car?”

  “Everybody has a lot on their minds.” Lezlie picked up the secret drawer and investigated its curious depth. “So, tell me about the letters. Where were they exactly?”

  “This is where I met Katherine and Ted.” Lanae reached into the hole left by the vacant drawer. “Bend over and watch my fingers.”

  Lezlie appeared lost in thought for a moment. Frowning, she exchanged the drawer for her mug, tracing the Frivolities logo. “Katherine. Ted. I’ve never heard either of these names. Dad told me about Great-grandma Juanita naming my grandma and great-aunts.”

  “The purple flower names.” Lanae filled in the pause.

  “Right. But Katherine and Ted draw a blank.”

  “Well, as soon as I have some free time, my mission is to discover who they are. The mystery is bugging me at all hours of the day and night.”

  Along with thoughts of your father.

  “Since the vanity was in my family, I’d love to help search. I have Internet service on my phone, so I could do some online searches any time, any place.”

  “Now, why didn’t I think of that?” Lanae raised her gaze to the painted ductwork before leading Lezlie back through the office to the sales floor of Frivolities. “I doubt I’ll ever get used to how fast technology has changed the world.”

  Geneva was hanging up the phone. She turned and joined them. “It’s an age thing.”

  Lanae added, “We didn’t grow up with this modern techie stuff so we think written tomes rather than keystrokes.”

  “Like Dick and Jane,” the sisters chimed.

  “Excuse me?”

  “That’s the name of the primer we learned to read from,” Geneva explained, with an airy wave of her hand.

  “Technology may not be what it’s all cracked up to be,” Lezlie said with a smile. “I think it’s pretty sweet, this love letter concept in the day of e-mail, and social media.”

  Lanae smiled at that. “You just take all the time you want to look around, and remember to ask if you need anything.” She indicated one of the display windows. “That’s where the vanity will go.”

  “I’m already drawn to what you ladies have made for yourselves here. Of course, I’ll have to check out turtles and other critters. Frogs, maybe, or some other whimsical animals.”

  “We do have country items. Authentic looking, as well as fantasy. I miss living and working in the country so much I suggested we stock some reminders of the outdoors.”

  Lezlie squared her arms in the air, elbows at her sides. “This is a no-brainer, if you miss it so much, Lanae. Dad loves to have the horses ridden, and he can’t ride four horses every day. I’m inviting you out to ride tomorrow afternoon.”

  “Sage won’t mind?”

  “I’ll tell Dad when I pick up Jaxson. As for now, I’m shopping.” Lezlie put action to her words and began to wander.

  Moselle grabbed Lanae’s elbow and pulled her into the office. “OK, give me the scoop.”

  Lanae told her all about the vanity, purposely ignoring the hint to hear about Sage.

  “Just think, Aunt Lanae, you could be meeting a bunch of losers from those singles ads. Instead, answering the ad for the vanity introduced you to Sage.” Moselle danced a little jig and twirled Lanae around. “I can’t wait to meet your guy with the gorgeous eyes. He’s bound to be something, judging by what you’ve just told me. Besides, I like his daughter.”

  ****

  “So, Dad, is Ted someone in our family? Who the heck is Katherine? Have you been holding out on me about family history? Are you keeping some grave, dark secret from Jaxson and me?”

  Sage felt his cheeks burn with the guilt of omission. Good thing he held on to his summer tan. “Why in the world do you want to go backward? Jax is doing fine in life. He couldn’t care less about long gone people from the past.”

  “Uh, reality check here, Dad. You are stuck in the past. You stopped moving forward when Mom died. That’s half my life. Sooner or later, the mind, body, and spirit will atrophy from all that negative energy you try to hide. Yet, it’s evident to me. You need to start living again. Remember, you can’t take a horse into your arms for a comforting hug.”

  Jaxson cracked up, laughing so hard even his ears turned red.

  Sage didn’t feel like laughing. Lezlie was way too serious when she looked him in the eye. She was on a roll.

  “My son and I have taken zeroes for grades in elementary school because you found some excuse not to help with family trees. The most I got out of you was your parents’ names. Other than my grandma was Violet and my granddad Myron, I only had Sage and Becca.”

  She was definitely on a roll. He let her get it out. “Christians aren’t supposed to swear, but I swear it’s like you are half here. Half-minded, even. And you aren’t old enough to have half-heimers yet.”

  Sage lowered his eyes to his boots and cocked his left ear toward his shoulder. Nothing like being told off by your own kid. His neck cracked when he moved his head to the right.

  “By the way, I invited Lanae to come out and ride tomorrow. I know you’ll be here.”

  That brought him front and center. He stared at Lezlie, too stunned to sputter a protest.

  Lezlie’s words ran through his mind. You stopped moving forward when Mom died.

  Was it so obvious that he stopped caring about life sixteen years ago? All this time he thought he’d kept to himself how much he missed Becca.

  Would he be able to keep the family secret to himself?

  “I’m glad Lanae found those letters. I want to find out who wrote them, Dad. If there’s a Ted in the family, I want to know. Jaxson needs to know about this side of the family, too. He has no dad, remember?”

  ****

  They can keep their talk to themselves. Gossip is for small minded people.

  June 17, 1960

  Friday a.m.

  Dearest Teddy — xxxx

  Thought I’d drop you a few lines and let you know why I couldn’t make it last night. Will tell you more when I see you. I was so spitting mad.

  But I’ve seen you that mad. Only difference, I’ll tell you why, yet you never have said what gets you so riled up. I can guess. I’ve heard some talk about your father.

  My dad refused to let me leave the house. You’d think that at my age I’d have some freedom. And I work so hard for him. I sweat for the family business.

  All I did was drop a tray of freshly frosted doughnuts, ordered by the banker for a special meeting. There were more than enough doughnuts on the shelf. I got them frosted and they were on time, but the way he reacted, a person would think I’d killed someone.

  Just one of those things.

  This looks like another grand day and me with so much work to do again. I worked from about 3:30 in the morning yesterday, until 3:30 in the afternoon. Then, I went home and fixed supper for my folks. I barely had time to get ready to leave, but my cantankerous father took the car keys.

  What kept me going through the night were thoughts of you. I closed my eyes and imagined us together on our special country road. I get all worked up thinking about what your kisses do to me. I’m sorry if that’s too forward. But Ted, I want you to take me a
way from this place so we can be together forever.

  Will it really be two long weeks before you are in Platteville again? I would think your father could do without your help more often than that.

  But no one works on the Fourth of July.

  So, I’ll be seeing you then. Be good, sweet, and bye-bye. Lots of love and kisses to you, my dear.

  Lovingly yours, and always yours,

  Katherine

  P.S. How’s the neck? I didn’t like the look of that bruise. Take good care of yourself. Until I can kiss it for you, Here’re xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx on paper.

  Lanae ignored the falling tears, cradled her stomach, where Katherine’s yearning had created a churning of her own.

  A longing for love.

  A desire to be with Sage.

  She pictured the young Katherine and Teddy in an antique car, stopped on a country road with a myriad of stars overhead. Would those eyes of Teddy’s be visible by moonlight?

  Would those eyes of Sage’s be visible by moonlight?

  Lanae imagined herself in a car, parked somewhere, sharing kisses with Sage.

  The fantasy soon had her choked with longing, and reminded her of how much she had missed over the years. The pull for close contact with a man was almost tangible, entailing much more than the intimacy of physical love. An emotional attachment had resurfaced in her own life, one she hadn’t missed until this moment.

  No one else would do, Sage was the only one to complete her human loneliness and fill the emptiness. She knew it as surely as there were words printed on the page held in her shaky hands.

  Cease, Lanae. And with that word, like a bolt from the Spirit, came the words, “Cease striving and know that I am God.”

  Oh, You are that, Father. And You created me and Sage and emotions. You created soul mates for relationships You ordain. Why am I so restless?

  She’d done fine for a lot of years without a man. And even if marriage was God’s future plan for her, He’d remain her All-in-All.

  She ran a hand over the copy of the letter. The originals remained in a travel caddy in the front seat of her car.

  Who are you, Katherine?

  And who is your beloved Teddy?

  She had to find out. The phone directory would be a good source. Or, she could search town history. The Historical Society had come up with a centennial book in recent years. Maybe something on record would reveal who owned the bakery that closed long before Lanae started high school. Since her mom had been a great cook, the bakery was one store she had never entered as a girl.

  And if Sage didn’t like what she planned, he could go jump in the Platte River.

  Probably wouldn’t hurt him to get woken up, to come to life in cold rushing water.

  8

  I want to get caught in the pouring rain. I want the memory, the feeling, of playing barefoot in oozing mud. Let the rain drip off the bottom of my hair and eyelashes.

  At the early service, inside the church entry, Lanae met Rainn. “Good morning, soon-to-be-brother. Mia’s off to Sunday school already? I missed saying hello.” Lanae gave her future brother-in-law no chance to draw a breath.

  He slanted his lopsided grin that accented the lines in his face and went so well with his silver hair. But he kept silent with that indulgent grin.

  She looked over his premature gray hair with the curl that Geneva loved and thought for the thousandth time how he was a perfect match for her sister’s redheaded liveliness.

  “Listen, I’ve come up with an idea for Frivolities, and I need male input. So I’m inviting you and Eric and my new friend, Sage, to a brainstorming session tomorrow in the loft.” When she paused for breath, she caught Rainn’s chuckle.

  “You done yet? What kind of food? Can Mia come?”

  “Mia is always welcome. You know that. Moselle’s casserole, my cheesecake, your sweetheart’s coffee—and Geneva will come up with something else.” She didn’t give him a chance to accept. “I’ll see you then. Now I’ll hunt down Eric.”

  She found him just inside the sanctuary entrance. After their greeting, she jumped in. “Eric, I need your and Rainn’s advice on a man’s shopping guide. Are you free Monday night?”

  “Moselle said something about that idea for Frivolities. Will the mystery man Sage be there?”

  “I plan to extend a personal invitation.”

  “Count me in.”

  The piano prelude began.

  “See you then.” Lanae lifted a hand and hurried down the aisle to her seat.

  ****

  Lanae got caught up in the music. As much as she had tried to concentrate on the sermon, she forgot the message from the pulpit as soon as she left Faith Bible Church.

  Mixed in with her newly awakened feelings for Sage was curiosity over the mystery of who Katherine was. Or is. For the first time since finding the bunch of letters, she wondered if the writer could still be living.

  As soon as she returned to the loft above Frivolities, she grabbed a colorful bookmark shaped like a flying dragon and used the straight edge to keep her eyes on each entry of the local phone book. She looked at every first name in every surrounding town until her eyes watered and lost focus.

  No Katherine, or the initial K, was listed. She did find Kate Rawlins, the town’s infamous gossipmonger. But Lanae couldn’t fathom juxtaposing sour Kate with passionate Katherine.

  And, who was Ted? Or is.

  “He could be alive as well.”

  Just for kicks, she started all over. The two Teds she ran across, she knew. One Ted was ninety and had a passel of relatives around town. The other Ted was the town mechanic, and he was too young.

  Should she come right out and ask Sage if either Katherine or Ted was a relative?

  Was Sage hiding something from her?

  The phone next to her arm rang and she shrieked. Lanae puffed out her cheeks and blew away her startle before picking up the phone.

  “Sage here. Guess my nosy daughter invited you out. Think you can be here after lunch?”

  She laughed low, with pleasure. “Good morning Sage. Home from church already?”

  “Headed there now. How about being here by one?”

  “Sounds too good to be true. I’ll be there.”

  Lanae needed something to fill the hour before she could head over to the acreage. She went downstairs to the office and played around on the Internet. She wished envelopes with names and addresses had been with the packet of letters, but they’d been banded together in one folded loose-leafed package. She decided to leave the task of questioning Sage about family members to Lezlie.

  She looked up the meanings for the word sage. She knew about Russian sage planted in gardens, and sagebrush, of course. She had torn off many a sage leaf to put moisture in her mouth while riding on the ranch. The plant was garden or desert variety, member of the mint family with the meaning “to heal.”

  Was Sage in her life as a healing influence? Or was she meant to profit from his wisdom?

  She also knew that Native Americans used sage in ceremonial smudgings. A glance at the clock ended her search. It was time to leave for the acreage. On the drive to Sage’s home, Lanae battled her mixed-up emotions.

  Oh, Lord, is it a sin to forget the music or message from this Sunday’s worship? Please cover me with the Spirit.

  Soon, she turned into Sage’s drive. When she stepped out of her car, she closed her eyes. Right there in the driveway, she raised her arms to heaven. She swung and twirled and burst out into song.

  God had given her life. His words spoke from between the covers of her Bible. Did she need to remember a sermon?

  When her eyes opened, Sage stood close enough to touch, smiling wide, character lines accented, flax-blue eyes snapping. Yummy.

  “I’m not sorry,” she announced. And couldn’t help but smile.

  “Didn’t say you should be. Good afternoon. And to clear any misperceptions, your exuberance tickles me.” Sage kicked up his heels and danced his own little bow-leg
ged hop, grinning like a fool the whole time. “Ready for that ride?”

  “And then some. Can’t you tell I’m excited to be here?”

  The music of the country, the nearness of Sage, opened every sense to her surroundings. Only the tips of nearby trees moved in the gentle breeze, creating a whispered pine symphony. A squirrel’s chatter reached her from the road. Soft leaf rustles rose from beneath the hill.

  A grating screech shattered the moment.

  “Neighbor’s truck. I told him he needs to fix those brakes ‘cause they sound like a sandpiper on speed.”

  She couldn’t help the giggles that erupted.

  Sage gave his little joke a twitch at one corner of his mouth. “I’ll take Freckles, and you can mount Snorty.”

  Lanae looked at Snorty, who was watching her. “It sure is something, isn’t it, how horses see in degrees, almost in a complete circle around them.”

  “Yup. They’re only blind right behind the tail. I think he likes your body language.”

  “Hey there, boy.” Lanae stroked his flank then over his withers, down the jawline. He jerked his head up when she untied the reins. She made a soft noise, patted him, and crossed the reins over the saddle horn.

  The horse reared his head and took a step back.

  “Horses are a flight animal. His instinct is to get away from you.”

  “I know. But I’m a fight animal, like all humans. He’ll get used to me.”

  Sage cupped his hands to give her a boost up. She settled into the saddle, right at home. She felt the heat from his hand where it rested on the horse, so close to her.

  “Snorty sure acted out when I first got him. Had a tender mouth due to chewing on a harsh bit.” He shot her a sharp look in the eye. “So, Ms. Horsewoman, have any idea how to get a horse to stop with another means besides pulling?”

  “You sit heavier in the seat instead of pulling on the bit in its mouth. You say ‘Whoa.’”

  “Alrighty then. You know what you’re doing. How’s the stirrup length?”

  “Perfect, thanks. Look at that. The sun is bright enough that a fly flew out to buzz in the warmth.”

  “I don’t care for pesky insects. One of the things I like about winter is that I don’t have to spray.” Sage picked up the reins and climbed onto Freckles.