Using my fork, I stood up and scraped the potato from the spoon onto my plate. ‘It looks great, Nan,’ I said and watched her mouth quiver into a forced smile, the gesture making my throat tighten. ‘I love your potatoes.’
After the mashed-potato episode, we reverted into some kind of weird, TV-commercial family, filling up awkward silences with lots of unfunny jokes that received more laughter than necessary. Nobody asked me about what had happened, or what I’d been through. The police had given my grandparents my false story, and I was sticking to it. I didn’t want to worry them any more than they already were. As it was, every now and then a thick silence would descend and I’d look up and find their teary eyes on me. If I were to tell them about Marin I was sure they wouldn’t understand. It would be hard for them, and they didn’t deserve any more hardship.
Lauren nudged my foot under the table and winked at me, grinning. I’d test my story on her first, and see how she took it, before revealing anything to my grandparents.
‘I think Miranda needs a rest,’ Nana said a few minutes later, and dropped her knife and fork onto her mostly uneaten plate of food. She yawned and rubbed at her wrinkled cheeks with her palms. ‘I think we all need an early night.’
The idea of going to sleep made me think of my room in Marin, and of Marko’s room, and Marko’s bed—the bed we’d kissed on, and would have perhaps done more on had we not been interrupted after Robbie had escaped. In that moment I had wanted to stay in Marin so badly.
I raised my hand so that the sun ring caught the dining-room light and reflected tiny, sparkling rays against the nearby water carafe. Tears warped my vision and I quickly wiped at my eyes before anyone could see.
Pop and Nana shared a worried frown of concern, and stood to clear the table. As the cutlery clattered against the plates, I looked up to find Lauren’s eyes on me. She held my gaze until Nana and Pop moved into the kitchen and then, ever so slowly, a gentle smile curved her lips.
‘I missed you, Randy.’ Her fingers grazed the back of my hand. ‘I’m so glad you’re home.’
I nodded and wondered how she was going to feel when I told her the truth about Mum and Dad, and Aiden.
* * *
Later, when it was bedtime, Pop came to tuck me in, and kissed me on the head like I was a kid again. I hadn’t been tucked in bed since I was ten, but the gesture was comforting.
But when I caved and I tried to tell him a little about the underwater city, he hugged me tight to his chest, his frail body racked with huge sobs.
‘Don’t worry, Miranda,’ he whispered after he’d caught his breath and sniffed a little. ‘Whatever happened down there at the beach, it’ll never happen again, love.’ He stroked my hair.
‘We won’t be going to Bob’s Bay again, ever. Your Nan and I have been talking. First thing on Monday, we’re going to put the shack up for sale. And then we can forget any of this ever happened.’ He kissed me on my forehead, smoothed the covers down and turned off the light, leaving me alone in my bedroom for the first time in what felt like forever.
I lay there in the dark hardly breathing at the idea of never returning to Bob’s Bay, and of never again seeing Marko, and of never knowing if Sylvia was a traitor to her younger brother. The idea of Marko being hurt—or worse, dead—with me never knowing made me feel like I was drowning.
Lauren sauntered in a few minutes after Pop left, and perched on the end of my bed. After dinner, while we both watched some reality TV, I’d told her a little of what had happened to me. To my great surprise, she’d listened without running away or laughing.
‘Tell me more about this underwater joint and the guy you were engaged to,’ she asked in a curious voice, before breaking into a wide smile. ‘You got engaged after knowing someone for less than two months? That is so unlike you, Randy.’
I shrugged. ‘I was forced into it—held captive. So it wasn’t like I had a say in it.’ A long sigh escaped my lips as I conjured Marko’s face. ‘The weird thing was, when he finally released me I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay with him.’
‘It’s called Stockholm Syndrome,’ said Lauren flatly.
A thick silence engulfed us, and for a while I kept my head down, fiddling with strands of my hair while I tried to think of a subtle way to bring up all of the issues we had between us in one cohesive sentence. It was only until she was about to leave my room that I finally gathered up the courage.
‘There’s something I have to tell you, Lauren, about Mum and Dad, and you’ll probably hate me after you hear it.’
Lauren spun around and eyed me curiously. My lungs felt like all the air had been squeezed out of them. I was desperate to purge the truth that had been rattling around inside of me for so long.
‘After you went out that night I rang them. I was pissed off that you’d left me home alone on my birthday, so I called them on the phone and told them that you’d left the house. That’s why they were headed back.’
‘I know,’ she whispered, after a long silence.
My head jerked up.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I know what happened, Miranda. I know what you did. I read your diary.’ She sniffed and wiped at her nose and eyes, which had turned red. ‘Sorry.’
‘Why aren’t you angry at me, then? If I were you, I would hate me.’ I knotted my fingers into my hair, and tugged at the long strands. ‘I rang Dad. And because I rang they raced home, probably tipsy from dinner drinks, and got wiped out by that bus.’
Lauren stepped back, shaking her head, her face screwed up, a lone tear streaking down her face.
‘No. After you rang them, they called me on my mobile. They were still at the restaurant, and wanted to know where I was and why I’d left you alone.’ Her chin quivered. ‘I spoke to Dad and we had an argument, so he said they were coming to pick me up from the party.’ She placed a hand over her forehead and slid it down over her wet cheek, her shining eyes meeting mine.
‘So it was my fault. They were going to stay at the restaurant but I had to go and be a little miss bitchy and get Dad so riled up that he wanted to come get me from the party right away.’
‘But I shouldn’t have called them in the first place,’ I said, my throat choking up.
‘No.’ Lauren said, her voice firm. ‘If I hadn’t left my little sister alone on her sixteenth birthday just so that I could go be with some jerk,’ she poked a finger at the window as if her ex-boyfriend was standing outside, ‘Mum and Dad would be alive today.’
I closed my eyes and took several deep breaths, the sound of Lauren’s quiet sobs making it hard to stop my own tears.
‘So you forgive me?’
‘Only if you forgive me, Randy.’
‘I do.’
Lauren wiped her face with the sleeves of her dark-blue cardigan.
‘Me too, then.’
A minute or so later Lauren flung herself onto the mattress and gazed up at the ceiling.
‘Tell me about this place you went to, about this Marin city.’ she said, grinning through her tears.
‘Okay,’ I croaked, not really sure if she was just humouring me or not. ‘But I’ve got to warn you, you’re going to hear about Aiden—and you might not like what you hear.’
Lauren stiffened and then stayed quiet for a long time. ‘Because you’re my sister and I miss you, I’ll listen. But you’re seriously starting to sound crazy. The only reason I want to believe you is because you have never ever lied to me—well, not really. The night of the accident doesn’t count.’
‘Before I explain everything, you have to know that I don’t have issues with you anymore.’
Lauren frowned and stiffened slightly. ‘What issues?’
I sucked in a deep breath through my nose. ‘I’ve been jealous of you my whole life.’
When she started to protest I put my hand up to shush her. ‘No. I’m not anymore. Well, at least not like I used to be.’ I pictured Marko the night he told me I was beautiful and that he liked me for who
I was. ‘Somebody helped me with that. So it’s not a problem anymore. I’ll never let my insecurities come between us again. Ever. I think we can be closer now.’
Lauren raised her head and shuffled across the mattress to make room for me. I lay down beside her. ‘Tell me what happened; the whole lot, from the beginning.’
‘Well, after our swim that night, I woke up in a strange bed, a full-on fairytale bed.’ I closed my eyes and conjured up the clouds of silk woven between the winking pearls, and the mermaids and mermen carved into the four wooden posts.
‘Keep going,’ Lauren whispered, and I took a deep breath before plunging back into the darkest depths of the ocean, to Marin.
* * *
Hours later I finished my story, just as the magpies outside greeted the rising sun with their warbles and Lauren’s lashes fluttered closed. I sighed. My chest hurt and my eyes stung from reliving Aiden’s last breath and my last moments with Marko and Robbie again—everything so real and vivid.
While the house slept, I crept out the front door and sat on the lawn to watch the sun rise up in the east. It winked at me through the branches of the large Moreton Bay fig tree that stood proud and ancient in our front garden.
I automatically groped at my ring finger, where Marko’s sun still rested. Fat tears slid down my cheeks. I was happy to be home with my family—I truly was. But now that I’d resolved things with Lauren, I couldn’t help but pine for Marko, the one guy who managed to make me like myself enough to believe that he wanted me.
It was like an uncontrollable urge, this wanting to return to Marin, to protect Marko from Sylvia. Maybe Marko was right—maybe the compulsion was whispering to my deepest subconscious, luring my thoughts to Marin. Or maybe my feelings for Marko ran deeper than I knew.
Warm sunlight caressed my face through a gap between the leaves of the tree, and I drew a deep breath and cast my eyes around me, drinking in the light and the bright, almost surreal surroundings. This was where I should want to belong. This is where I should be happy, with the real sky above me and the sun on my face.
My eyes rested on my black Valiant, waiting patiently for me in the driveway. A ray of sunshine lit up the corner of its rear bumper, creating a little silver star. A vision of me driving down the highway towards Bob’s Bay chased away some of the sadness that weighed down my heart.
But the sadness swiftly returned. Even if I went down to Bob’s Bay every day for the rest of my life, there’s no way I’d be able to return to Marin because no-one would be waiting in the water for me.
Shaking with the horrible reality that I’d never see Marko—or Robbie—again, I broke out in a sweat and raced inside, directly to the bathroom. The house was quiet and dim, so I flicked on the light in an attempt to diminish some of the darkness.
The shower spray hit the tiles full blast while I undressed. I needed to wash away all this dread—this sickening, sinking realisation that I’d never return to Marin.
I flung my bra off and, once again, to my disbelief, the sun ring got caught and slipped off my finger to ping against the hard floor. It was like deja vu. What was it with me and this ring? I rushed over to it, thankful it hadn’t gone down the drain. I scooped it up into my hand and checked it over for damage.
To my horror, when I touched the stone, it came away from the band—but then I remembered Marko’s words: It’s a locket ring. You can store my picture beneath the crystal if you like. I fell hard to the ground.
Right at the base of the locket was a small square of folded paper, no bigger than my thumbnail. I took it out and carefully set down the ring.
Through the haze of the rising steam from the shower, I gently unfolded the wafer-thin piece of paper.
My head felt light when I recognised the black, stylish handwriting. My eyes devoured the words.
Miranda,
I hope this note finds you safe and well with your family. I hid it in your ring, knowing that fate would decide whether or not you’d find it. If you are reading this, then fate is my friend.
I sent you back to undo my dark and terrible deed of taking you, but now that you have been returned I offer you this:
Miranda, if by some miracle you wish to return to Marin by the time it is your eighteenth birthday, then I will be waiting for you at the very place you were taken. I will be there at midnight, January thirteenth of next year. By this time, Damir will be dealt with, along with his men, and Marin will once again be a safe city.
If you return, you return as a free citizen—free to choose who you keep as your company. And while I can’t help but hope your heart belongs to me, I respect any choice you make.
Marko
Tears of relief blurred my surroundings. I rested my back against the cool tiles, covering my naked heart with Marko’s letter.
Someone knocked on the bathroom door.
‘Miranda,’ Nana called out in her croaky morning voice. ‘Are you alright?’
I cleared my throat.
‘I’m fine, Nana.’
‘Okay. I’ll put the porridge on.’
Closing my eyes, I listened to the sound of the running water, like rain drops, like stars falling. I pictured the stunning ballroom, the way the crystal stars had rained sparkles over the dance floor where Marko had held me close in his arms.
Lauren and I were sisters again. Mum and Dads’, and even Aiden’s, souls could rest easy now.
All that I needed now was Marko.
I let out a great, shuddery sigh, and pictured diving deep into the cool blue ocean, swimming towards the glittering city of Marin. I pictured Marko’s face, imagined his lips forming the words from the letter he gave me; I remembered the way his eyes had held mine when he’d told me I was beautiful.
A soft smile tugged at the corners of my mouth, but it was soon followed by a sickening dread that had me trembling against the tiles.
Sylvia.
I would return to Bob’s Bay on my eighteenth birthday, and would willingly step into the ocean. But the question was…
Would anybody be there waiting for me?
talk about it
not quite ready to move on from what happened?
let’s talk about it.
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MARIA V. SNYDER
A bestselling, action-packed fantasy series
about Avry of Kazan and her fight for freedom.
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ISBN: 9781488711282
TITLE: CAPTIVATE
First Australian Publication 2014
Copyright © 2014 VANESSA GARDEN
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilisation of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the permission of the publisher:
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