Jeremiah nodded, numb. Another twenty minutes passed and Ben put the lawn mower back in the far shed by the barn and trudged up through the shadows back to the porch.
Jeremiah stood, the blanket slipping off his lap.
“Ben,” he said when the boy started up the stairs. In the white floodlights Jeremiah saw the scratches and blood on his arms, the dirt on his hands, the broken nails. Ben had been in his own fight tonight, but when he looked up at Jeremiah, his eyes were dry.
“What?”
“You…all right?”
Ben glanced back at the garden he’d laid to waste. “No one used that stupid garden anymore.”
It wasn’t stupid, he wanted to say. It was one of the few things of your mom we had left and you just destroyed it—
Cynthia’s cool hand touched his arm.
“Go on in and shower, Ben,” she said. “It’s late.”
Ben nodded and didn’t once look back at Jeremiah.
* * *
LUCY WOKE UP WITH a long slow stretch, clinging to the fevered dream she’d been having of Jeremiah. Paper crinkled when she rolled over and she quickly sat up. More designs. Wedding bands. Leather and silver cuffs. Jewelry for men.
The designer she’d been was gone. Moved out. The delicate girlish pieces, replaced by jewelry with weight. Literally and figuratively.
“Wake up, Lucy.” Her mother’s voice snapped her right out of her thoughts and she turned, paper in hands, to show her mom the work.
But Sandra was standing in an angry-mom pose at the end of her bed.
“What’s wrong, Mom?”
“Why are you selling our condo?”
Lucy was never quick on her feet in the morning and despite all the lying she was doing currently in her life, she didn’t have a lot of practice with it.
“What—?”
“Don’t you dare lie to me, Lucy. I called the real estate agent, and she said she’s been boxing our stuff up to stage it.”
Oh, no. No. She didn’t want to wake up to this mess, not after last night. Lucy tossed off the covers, deciding the best defense in this situation was a good offense.
“I’m just checking the market, Mom—”
“Our things!”
“In boxes. Safe in storage.”
Sandra’s eyes didn’t let up. “This is not like you, Lucy. There are secrets you’re keeping. Your business—”
“I sold it.” As soon as the words came out of her mouth she wanted to suck them back in. Sandra’s body went lax with shock.
“No, honey, you didn’t—”
“I did.” She tried to hug her mother, to make this all sound like a celebration, but Sandra stepped away.
“Did you get a good offer?”
Ah, twenty thousand dollars in debt or bankruptcy? Not quite. “Good enough to sell.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? Or Mia?”
“Because I knew you wouldn’t understand.”
“You’re right, I don’t understand. You’ve been making jewelry your whole life—”
“That’s right, Mom, my whole life, and I can start a new business. Look—” She tried to distract her mom with her new designs but Sandra wasn’t going to be deterred.
“But your employees? The studio? You were so successful. You loved Los Angeles.”
She nearly snorted, but managed to stop herself. “Mom, I hated Los Angeles, almost as much as you did.”
“Is that why you sold?”
“One of the reasons. Look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but I didn’t think anyone would care.”
Sandra scowled at her for that. “When have I not cared about every single part of your life?”
“Maybe…maybe I just didn’t want you to care. Maybe I just wanted it to be private.”
Oh, that hurt her mother and her face turned to stone before she left the room, leaving a chill behind.
* * *
“UNCLE J.?” CASEY ASKED for about the twentieth time. “Are we going to go inside?”
“Yep.” But Jeremiah didn’t move. He had his arms crossed over the top of the steering wheel and just kept staring out the windshield at the Rocky M. It was Monday afternoon and they were early. He had some kind of half-baked notion that he might catch Lucy and Ben in whatever kind of elaborate lie they were working on.
Or, he thought, trying to look on the bright side, maybe he’d catch them back in that garden working hard.
All he had to do was ask Lucy if she was lying to him. Before Saturday night it would have been hard, but after Saturday night…he just felt like the biggest asshole even thinking she’d lied to him. That woman in the hotel room, and even that night at the arcade—that woman wouldn’t lie to him. That woman had haunted him for two days. And for two days he’d let himself get consumed by the work of the ranch, the work of the boys, so he wouldn’t have to think about the chance that Lucy had been lying to him.
But, of course, Ben could be lying about hanging out every day in the barn instead of working with Lucy on the garden. His gut was telling him that something just wasn’t right about this situation.
So, he had to ask. He just had to man-up and ask.
“Let’s go, Casey.” He popped open the door and Casey scrambled out of his booster seat in the backseat of the cab.
“Is someone in trouble?”
“Why?” Jeremiah asked, opening the door so Casey could jump down.
“You got your trouble face on.”
Jeremiah forced a smile and rubbed his nephew’s hair. They took three steps toward the front door and it opened. Lucy stepped out, her hair in inky damp curls down her back. Her long, lithe body was dressed in a yellow sundress that hugged her breasts and flared at her waist, leaving miles of her legs bare. The finishing touch—cowboy boots. Honestly, she was his dream come true.
His heart hammered at the sight of her, his blood churning in veins suddenly too small.
She’d dressed that way for him. He knew it.
But she stopped when she saw him and for a moment, one moment, her panicked face revealed everything. Disappointment replaced desire.
“You’re early.” Her voice was a death knell. Friends, he thought, bitterness creeping into his heart like poison. Friends don’t lie.
“Where is he?” he asked, and she took the steps down to him carefully, her face composing itself. Her quick brain was probably coming up with a hundred excuses and he couldn’t stand it. When she stopped in front of him and opened her mouth, no doubt to feed him some lie, he held up his hand.
“Don’t,” he said. “I know he hasn’t been working with you.”
“How?”
“Does it matter?”
Her dark complexion had paled, but now blush crept into her cheeks.
“I guess not.”
“You lied.”
“It’s not like that, Jeremiah.”
“No? Is it like you’re lying to your family about your business?”
“Don’t—” She reached as if to hush him and he stepped back, pinning her in place with his eyes. Beside him, Casey clung to his leg, freaked out by the animosity between him and Lucy.
“Casey, go and wake your brother up in the barn. That’s where he is, right?” he asked Lucy.
“He’s there but he’s not sleeping,” she said.
“Well, he’s certainly not gardening with you, is he?”
Casey ran off, leaving them alone.
“You lied, Lucy. Right to me. About Ben…you know what kind of trouble he’s in—”
“I was going to tell you. I was, but I could see it was such a relief for you, not to have to be the bad guy again.”
“Don’t make this about me, Lucy. You lied. You.”
“Fine. You’re right. It started and I thought I would get him to open up and talk to me and it would all pour out, all of his feelings, and I could be the hero. But he just…he wouldn’t do what I told him.”
“Really? And you don’t think I have some experience with that?”
>
The look she gave him was so naked and he realized why he was so angry right now. It wasn’t about Ben. He was angry because he’d shown her more of himself, more of his despair and confusion, in one kiss than he’d revealed to anyone in over two years.
But she’d done the same to him and he turned it on her, a blade she’d inadvertently sharpened.
“Let me guess what this is really about—you didn’t want to fail again.”
She barely flinched. “Something like that.”
He put his hands over his eyes, rubbing his forehead. He wanted to hold on to his anger, his righteousness, but…damn it, as much as he’d revealed to her, she’d done the same and he understood, when he didn’t want to. He wanted to hold on to his anger a little longer.
“Hey, Jeremiah, you staying for dinner?” It was Sandra, standing next to a daughter who looked about as guilty as a woman in a bright yellow sundress could look.
“No, Sandra, but thanks.”
“Are you sure? Mia and Jack are coming, too.”
“Sounds like a party. But we’ve got to head home.”
“Next time, then?”
Lucy hung her head for a moment and he felt bad for her, he really did; she was carrying so many damn lies right now it had to be making her sick.
“I don’t think there’s going to be a next time, Sandra. Ben’s not going to be hanging around anymore.”
“What?” Sandra looked shocked—at least she hadn’t been in on the lie. “Why not?”
“Ask your daughter.”
He turned at the sound of Casey’s laughter and saw the highly unlikely trio of Casey, Ben and Walter walking across the parking area from the garage.
Ben had his hand under Walter’s elbow like the boy was keeping him upright. And he was smiling. Not a lot. Not like he used to, but more than he had in months.
Jeremiah shot a quick look over his shoulder at Lucy.
“I told you, he hasn’t been napping,” she said. “I know it sounds crazy, but he’s been working with Walter.”
Walter? The thought did not inspire confidence.
“Hi, guys,” Jeremiah said, walking toward the trio. At the sound of his voice, Ben’s face dropped its smile and the scowl came back. “You need some help, Walter?” he asked.
“I’m all right.” Walter stopped in front of Jeremiah and Jeremiah felt Sandra and Lucy come up to stand beside him.
“Ben,” Jeremiah said, “you need to say goodbye.”
Ben nodded. “See you later, Walter,” he said to the old man, ignoring Lucy entirely.
Jeremiah shook his head. “You’re not coming back.”
“What?” Ben howled.
“The deal was you were supposed to work off the damage you caused to Reese’s car with Lucy. You haven’t done a single thing with Lucy, have you? You haven’t been working in the garden like you told me you were—”
Ben turned bright red and Jeremiah braced himself for a screaming fit.
“He’s been working with me,” Walter said.
“That’s great, Walter, but it doesn’t change the fact that Ben has been lying to me.”
“Sounds like Lucy’s been lying to you, too,” Sandra said, her voice ominous.
Oh, God, he did not want to get tangled up in this. He wanted to get his boys back home and figure out what to do next in the privacy of his own house. He’d been wrong to ask Lucy for help, that much was obvious. Annie would be furious with him right now, spreading their dirty laundry around to the neighbors.
“Come on, Ben. Casey. Let’s go.”
“Hold on a second,” Walter said, holding out a hand. “If he can’t stay and work for Lucy, can he stay and work for me?”
“What are you talking about?” Lucy asked.
Ben was staring at the old man like he didn’t know what was going on, either.
Walter lifted his chin. “Everyone thinks I need a nurse, well…I want Ben to be my nurse.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
THEY ALL SAT AROUND an empty table.
I should get some food, Sandra thought. But she didn’t. No one was going to eat it. Everyone was too full of emotion to eat.
Jack had his head in his hands, his hat on the table beside him. “Dad, he’s just a kid.”
“He helped take care of his mother,” Walter said, looking like a man who’d just managed to get out of a trap.
This is how badly he wants me to leave, she thought. He would have a child in my place.
“You did?” Jeremiah asked Ben. “You took care of your mom?”
Ben nodded. “Before she got so bad she had to go to the hospital. I just got her a lot of ice when she asked. Read her some books. It wasn’t a big deal.”
But it was, she could tell by Jeremiah’s face that it was a very big deal.
“That’s incredibly noble, Ben,” Mia said. “It’s amazing really, but Walter—”
“Is sitting right here,” Walter said.
“Fine,” Mia said, sitting up in her chair and looking right at Walter. “You’ve been sober…what? A week?”
“Two and half.”
“And you’ve been taking your medicine how long?”
“Three months.”
“You’ve terrorized every person we’ve brought in and I’m supposed to believe that you’ll let this…child help you?”
“He is who I want.”
“Nonsense,” Sandra said, getting to her feet. “You just don’t want me.” Everyone turned to look at her and she didn’t care.
“You are so desperate for me to leave that you are willing to use this boy.” She stared at Walter. “Do you deny it?”
Walter nodded his head. “I do want you to leave.”
“What the hell, Walter,” Lucy snapped. “She’s been nothing but good to you.”
Walter wouldn’t look at her eyes and Sandra felt the devil in her, the devil that used to make her punch kids in the playground for saying things about her fanatic mother. About her worn, ill-fitting hand-me-downs. The devil took control.
“If you want me to go, tell them the truth. Tell them why.”
Walter shook his head.
“Dad,” Jack whispered, “what is going on here?”
The silence in the room had screws and all of them felt the pain. Finally, Walter looked up. “Your mother was right,” Walter said, looking his son in the face.
“About…about what?” Jack asked, looking quickly at Mia, who only shrugged.
Walter looked up at Sandra, and the shame on his face gave her pause. Made her wish she had better control of her devils. “I loved Sandra.”
The entire room gasped and Sandra nearly smiled. So strange how, listening to him confess it made her so happy.
Jeremiah stood, his hands on the shoulders of the boys beside him. “We’re going to go.”
Walter stood, too, and looked at Ben and Jeremiah. “I know it’s different. And I know why you don’t exactly trust me. Or Ben. But—” Walter cleared his throat and the room was silent. Sandra held her breath. “But Ben’s doing good work for me. And he’s working hard.”
“I…” Jeremiah shook his head. “I’m going to have to think about it.”
“Do that,” Walter said.
Ben and Casey followed Jeremiah out the door and then, surprisingly, Ben turned back around. “Thanks, Walter.”
“You’re welcome, Ben.”
In the hallway Jeremiah’s face registered shock as well as profound pain and Lucy gasped. Sandra saw that Lucy’s hands were knotted in her lap.
When did it happen, Sandra wondered, that Lucy started to feel so much for Jeremiah Stone?
Once Jeremiah and the boys had left, Jack stood.
“Dad, what did you think would happen when you had Sandra come here? Did you… I mean, were you hoping—” Jack looked supremely pained and Sandra almost laughed, but the tension in the room suffocated it “—to be with her?”
Walter shook his head. “I just…I just wanted to make things right. Sandra bel
ongs here. This was her home and I let Vicki take that away from her.”
“But now you want her to leave?” Mia said.
“It was one thing when she didn’t know…” Walter stopped, shook his head and then abruptly turned away. He snatched his cane from the side of the table and lurched out of the room, down the darker hallway.
“Dad—” Jack took a step after him but then stopped and turned wide eyes to Mia. “What do we do?”
Mia shrugged. “I have no clue,” she said. “None.”
Sandra could feel Lucy’s eyes on her, shrewd and knowing, and she braced herself for the question to come. “Mom,” Lucy finally asked, “do you…do you have feelings for Walter?”
“Would that be so wrong?”
Lucy’s jaw dropped. “Ah, yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s Walter, Mom.”
“Lucy—” Jack sighed.
“He helped you with Ben, a favor for which you seem very ungrateful,” Sandra chided, and Lucy shut her mouth. But Lucy couldn’t keep quiet for long.
“Okay, he seems to be trying—”
“He is trying,” Jack said, “pretty damn hard.”
Lucy stared at Sandra, clearly reluctant to give Walter an inch despite his deserving it. “But what about Dad?”
“He’s been gone five years,” Sandra said, choosing once again not to tell her daughters the truth about her marriage. “I am lonely.”
“For Walter?”
“For a friend,” Sandra clarified. “And I think Walter could use one, too.”
“Very noble, Mom,” Lucy said.
Oh, thought Sandra, you have no idea. “If you’re going to be snide, I’d rather not talk to you about this.”
Lucy appealed to her sister. “Mia. Come on, you can’t think this is a good idea.”
Mia took a deep breath. “I do, actually. Walter…Walter’s made a lot of mistakes and he’s paid for every one of them. He was good to me when you all were gone. He…he is family.”
Sandra smiled at Mia, proud of her baby.
“Jack?” Lucy asked, still searching for support.
“I’m worried about his drinking,” Jack said. “And, Sandra, he’s not very good with friendship—I’d hate to see you get hurt.”
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