Her eyes prickled with new tears because what he said was absolutely true. Adam proved his love for her every day in big and small ways. And she could tell by his tone that her statement to the contrary had stung.
She touched his face. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. And yes, I would do anything for you. You know I get on a tangent sometimes and say stupid things. I love you so much, Adam.”
“I know you do, honey. I love you too.”
She pressed a kiss to his lips, savoring his familiar taste and feel.
Everything had already been set into motion with the sale of the inn. She didn’t know how to bring the machine to a screeching halt. “They might want to sell the inn regardless. They might want to close this chapter of their lives. It’s been a long, hard road.”
“Well, there’s only one way to find out.”
Chapter Forty-One
Wyatt’s first thought when he opened his eyes the next morning was that he didn’t remember a single dream. He’d slept right through the night for the first time in days.
His second thought was of Grace. He needed to talk with her. See how she was doing. The memory of her distress in the car yesterday made his chest ache. He hoped she hadn’t tossed and turned all night. He hoped she’d find a way to shed the guilt. He hoped she’d find the same peace he had.
He rushed through his shower and dressed in the only clean outfit he had left. He needed to make some calls today—particularly the one to his boss. His leave was up in four days, and he needed to confirm that he was ready to get back to work.
He needed to call Ethan and catch up. His friend had texted yesterday while he’d been out of range, and Wyatt hadn’t had a chance to reply.
It wasn’t yet nine o’clock when Wyatt made his way down the stairs. He said hello to Jada, the new girl at the front desk, and followed the delicious aroma of frying bacon to the dining room.
He caught a glimpse of couples and small families before he saw Grace. She was sitting at a table for two by the window, tapping her laptop keys, a half-eaten muffin on a plate at her side. Her hair was up in a ponytail, exposing her graceful neck and the delicate shells of her ears.
She didn’t notice him until he was lowering himself into the chair across from her.
“Good morning,” he said.
“Morning.” She stared at him tentatively, probably trying to work out how to behave after all that had happened yesterday.
He reached across the table and took her hand. “How are you feeling this morning? Yesterday was . . . a lot.”
Her face softened, shoulders relaxing at the direct question. “No kidding. I’m better, I think. How’d you sleep?”
“Like a baby.”
“I’m so glad to hear that, Wyatt. You look good—well rested.”
One of the servers came to take his order, then retreated to the kitchen. A silence fell over the table. Wyatt dreaded the coming conversation. He’d turned this situation every which way, and it never ended well. He was the older, more experienced one here. He needed to be strong and do what was right for Grace. But when he thought about leaving her, he didn’t feel strong at all. He felt like a bowl of quivering Jell-O.
Grace cleared her throat. “Wyatt, I—I wanted to thank you for everything you said yesterday.”
“I meant every word.”
“I know you did—that’s why it meant so much to me.”
“I called my dad last night, told him everything. He was relieved I’ll finally be able to put all this behind me. I’ve tried to shield him from what I’ve been going through—it was a dark time in his life too. I think he’s been more worried about me than he’s let on.”
“I’m happy for you. You deserve to have closure.”
“So do you, Grace.” It might take time, but he hoped eventually she would fully embrace that.
She gave him a wan smile. “I’m just starting to believe that.”
“Do you realize we’ve both been dealing with the same thing for years? We both have survivor’s guilt.”
“We’ve dealt with it in different ways though.”
“I made a career out of helping people.”
“And I’ve been trying to justify my place in the world.”
“And even though we’re both Lone Rangers, it took us coming together to arrive at a place of healing.”
Their eyes connected, a moment of silence passing between them, the weight of this discovery needing no words of explanation.
Grace looked down at her half-eaten muffin, then back up at him. “So . . . you found what you were looking for. I guess you’ll be leaving soon.”
He studied her eyes, noting the way the corners drooped in sadness. The way she rubbed her lips together.
“I have to get back to work Monday. I was a bit of a mess when I left, and unfortunately I have a psychological evaluation to pass before I can return to work.”
Grace’s brows hitched. “Are you worried about that?”
“Not anymore. The good news is I’ll be getting promoted soon—to presidential detail.” His face split into a grin. “I was reluctant to say that out loud until now.”
“Wyatt—that’s amazing. Your dream job.”
“It’s been a long, hard road. I’ll need a couple days to sort things out at home before Monday. I’ve been gone awhile.”
“Of course.”
“I wanted to make sure you were going to be all right before I left.”
She blinked. “Oh. Yeah, I’ll be fine. Don’t let me keep you.”
Didn’t she know? If anything at all could keep him, it was her. She deserved more than talking around the important topic of their relationship. He wanted to be up front about it.
He gathered his courage and squeezed her hand. “Grace, I wish I could stay. I wish . . .” He clenched his jaws together, keeping the words in. He wished he could tell her he loved her. Because he did. She’d become a part of him so quickly. So easily.
But telling her that seemed cruel when he was about to leave.
“I wish things were different,” he said.
“It’s okay, Wyatt. You have an important job, and I know it means a lot to you.”
“And I could never ask you to give up your dreams. Your business is important to you, and you’re going to do great. You’re going to have the best outfitters business in the Blue Ridge Mountains, I have no doubt.”
The smile she gave him seemed hard fought. “I hope so.”
“Better believe it.” He let his gaze rove over her face, memorizing the shape of her eyes, the gentle taper of her nose, the sweet curve of her lips. He only wished he could bottle up this feeling he had when he was with her. “This is going to be hard, parting ways. You’ve become someone I can confide in, someone I can trust.”
“I feel the same. It happened so quickly.”
“I keep telling myself we could keep up a long-distance relationship. I could come see you when I’m at the field office, weekends. But I travel so much, Grace. Communication is difficult when I’m on assignment, and there would be no end in sight. That’s no life for you. You deserve so much better.”
His job had never cost him so much; it was costing him the woman he loved. For a moment he was tempted to throw it all away—his training, his hard work, his promotion—and just tell her he was staying. He could be happy here in Bluebell with Grace. His heart pounded at the thought, and his chest tightened.
But protecting people was his way of life. His calling. He didn’t even know what else he’d do that would bring him the same sense of satisfaction.
“I want you to be happy, Grace. I want that above all else.” And he knew from experience, absence did not make a woman happy.
She opened her mouth, and he could tell she was about to refute the statement. Maybe say that he made her happy. But when she closed her mouth again a tiny bubble burst inside.
“You’re right,” she said, a catch in her throat. “I don’t like it, but you’re right.”
<
br /> They stared at each other across the table, linked by their hands, hopelessness weighting the air between them. He’d finally found a woman who felt like home, and he couldn’t have her.
Why, God?
The server came and set his food on the table. But his appetite was gone. His stomach was in knots, and the pungent smell of bacon was an affront to his senses.
When the server left, Grace closed her laptop and checked the time.
“Are you headed out now?” he asked.
“The sellers are letting me into the house for a couple hours this morning to measure and stuff. I was just making a list of everything I need to do while I’m there.”
He studied her for a long moment. “I was thinking of leaving today, Grace. Drawing this out will only make it more difficult for both of us.”
“Is this it, then? Are we saying good-bye now?”
“I still have to pack up my stuff and check out. And I’d like to see your new place. How about if I stop by on my way out of town?”
Her lips turned up, but there was no smile behind those blue eyes. “I’d like that.”
* * *
At the new house Pamela let Grace in and promised to return in a couple hours to lock up. Once inside Grace forced herself to work through her list. First she opened the windows to let the cool breeze in, then she took measurements for the windows and the checkout counter she was having made.
A friend of Levi’s stopped by to talk about the walls that would need to come down and additional structural support. Once he left she went up to the attic and checked out her soon-to-be digs, getting excited at the thought of having her own place, despite the ache of impending heartbreak.
She made a list of all the things she’d need to make the house into her business. It was long and detailed, but it kept her mind off the realization that she was about to say good-bye to the love of her life.
It seemed absurd that she could say that about a man she’d only known three weeks. But she knew in her heart it was true. They’d been through so much together. She felt as if she’d known him for years. Or maybe that she’d always known him. Maybe this was how it always felt, falling in love. As if you couldn’t fathom how you’d even existed before then. The thought made her heart palpitate, made her palms sweat.
But Wyatt had important things to do. He had a calling—his dream job awaited. And she loved him enough not to stand in his way.
He was an amazing man. Despite what he’d been through, he was confident but humble. Not feeling as though he was undeserving of good things. Just clearly seeing his place in the world and being content with that. She was striving for that. He’d shown her what that looked like.
She was coming down the attic steps when she heard the front door open.
“Grace?” Wyatt called.
“Right here,” she called as she walked down the short hall.
In the entryway he took off his sunglasses, and with the light behind him silhouetting his frame, he surveyed the space with those keen eyes.
He looked so much like he had that first day he’d walked into the inn. Into her life. She thought he’d shaken her up good, but that had only been the beginning. He’d turned her inside out and upside down. In all the best ways.
“This is going to be perfect,” he said as she joined him in what would be her store. “You were right about the location, and I can already see this space in my mind’s eye. You have good instincts.”
Joy swelled inside at his words. “You think so?”
He smiled at her and took her hand. “I know so. Give me the grand tour.”
She took him around, pointing out the house’s features and everything she was planning to change. Though she maintained a cheerful countenance, his impending departure was background music, a mournful playlist, its volume increasing with each passing moment.
By the time they were back downstairs and headed toward the front door, Grace’s chest felt weighted.
“It’s going to be great, Grace. You’re going to be great.”
When she reached the spot where her checkout counter would go, she turned to him. The tour was over, and she was almost out of time. Pamela was going to be here soon, and she still had a few items on her list to complete. She couldn’t bring herself to care, however.
“Hope you’re right.” She’d tried for cheerful, but that playlist was getting to her, and her voice caught on the last word.
“Come here, honey.” He took her hand and pulled her into his arms.
She gratefully pressed into the hard planes of his chest and buried her face in the warm curve of his neck. She inhaled his clean, masculine smell, wishing she could bottle it. She memorized the feel of his arms wrapped tight around her. The delicious rasp of his unshaven jaw against her forehead. The warm wisp of breath at her temple.
“I’m so glad I met you, Grace Bennett,” he whispered, then dropped a soft kiss on her forehead. “And I’m so glad you survived.”
Her eyes stung with tears because she knew what her survival had cost him. Her throat ached with his kindness. She tightened her arms around him.
“I want you to find that peace, Grace. If that’s all that comes of what happened here, it would be worth it to me.”
She couldn’t speak past the lump in her throat, so she just held him and let him hold her. She tried to remember what this felt like so when she lay upstairs in her bed on lonely nights, she could call it all back up. So she could comfort herself with the memory of what it had felt like to be so fully loved.
A tear trickled down her cheek just as he drew back enough to look at her.
He kissed the tear away. “Know what I thought when I first laid eyes on you?”
She shook her head, gazing into eyes she adored.
“I thought, ‘Now here’s a very special woman.’”
She gave a wry laugh. “No, you didn’t.”
“Yes, I did. God has big plans for you, Gracie. This place, this house, is only the beginning of what He’s going to do through you. You’re here for a purpose. Don’t ever forget that.”
Another tear leaked out. She pressed her face to his shoulder, and he wrapped his arms around her again. How in the world did he always know exactly what she needed to hear? And what would she do when he wasn’t here to say those things?
Maybe she’d have to start saying them to herself.
They clung to each other for a time, seconds bleeding into minutes. Pamela would be here soon, and she didn’t want the Realtor walking in on their last moments.
As if reading her mind, Wyatt drew back. “I should go.”
She gave him a wobbly smile. “I’ll walk you out.”
“No.” His hands framed her face. “I want to remember you just like this. Here in your new place, living your dream.”
Her eyes stung again, and she swallowed around the achy lump in her throat.
“I’ll miss you, Grace. You have no idea how much.”
“Yes, I do.”
He pressed a slow, soft kiss to her lips. It was too brief. But it could’ve gone on forever and still not been long enough.
He stepped away, turned to open the door. On the threshold he looked back one last time, gave her that enigmatic smile, and then he was gone.
Chapter Forty-Two
After Grace said good-bye to Wyatt she returned home and wept in the privacy of her shower. Later Molly tried to pry her feelings out of her, and when Grace shut her out, Molly switched to sympathetic looks. But Grace just put on a brave face and tried to keep busy.
On Saturday Mia and Levi returned from their honeymoon, a nice distraction from Grace’s heartbreak. She’d always found that word to be so overwrought and sappy. Who knew that the actual experience caused a literal ache in the chest right where the heart resided?
After sleeping off their jet lag on Saturday, Mia and Levi awakened refreshed and ready to gush about their time abroad. They’d strolled the streets of Paris, visited the Louvre, floated down the Seine Rive
r, and taken the elevator up the Eiffel Tower.
As Mia spoke she wore a beautiful flush, and Levi watched her with affection. Every once in a while they traded private little smiles that made Grace happy for them even while she was sad for herself. She despaired of ever finding someone she could love as much as she loved Wyatt.
The whole family went to church on Sunday, leaving Jada in charge of the inn. Molly shifted and twitched beside her until Grace was ready to put an elbow in her ribs. After church they went back home and had lunch in the dining room.
Levi and Mia were flying to LA tomorrow with as much of Levi’s belongings as he could stash in his suitcases. There’d be a press release and interviews about their wedding, which had still gone unnoticed.
They feasted on Miss Della’s fried chicken and potato salad until they were stuffed. Lunch was slowly winding down, and the other guests had already finished and gone on about their day, leaving the dining room to the family.
Grace glanced around the table, acutely aware that her siblings were now coupled up, making her the proverbial fifth wheel. Would it always be this way?
Mia pushed back her empty plate. “I’m not ready to get back on a plane tomorrow.”
“Or travel across three more time zones,” Levi said.
“And I don’t even want to get on the scale. I ate my body weight in baguettes.”
“You look great. Please tell me I’m not going to be subsisting on tofu and seaweed once we get to LA.”
Mia shrugged and gave him a you’ll just have to wait and see look.
“Well,” Grace said, “I know you’re excited about moving, but don’t forget to sign the Johnsons’ offer before you leave.”
“Did the attorney review it?” Levi asked. “Everything’s on the up-and-up?”
“Um . . .” Molly cleared her throat and traded a peculiar look with Adam. “I wanted to talk to you guys about that . . .”
Autumn Skies: 3 (A Bluebell Inn Romance) Page 22