A few minutes later they were in Jason’s truck. The windows were down and Miranda’s hair whipped around her face. She pulled it into a ponytail while Jason turned on the radio.
“I’m nervous, Jason.”
He shifted the truck, then reached for her hand. “Why?”
“I can’t explain it. It feels like facing a failure.” She chewed on her thumbnail. “What if she hates me?”
“She doesn’t hate you. Besides, I thought you guys have been texting all these months.”
“Yeah, well, if she lied about so much, she probably lied in her texts, too.”
Jason squeezed her hand and held it resting against his leg. A warm wave rose at his touch, and calmed her. “We’ll get through this,” he said.
“The only thing important is getting Cassie through this. She still doesn’t know about the baby.”
Jason’s lips narrowed and he released her hand. “That makes me furious. I want to kill him.” He slammed the steering wheel with his palm.
“She’s eighteen, Jason, not some little girl.”
“Say what you want, but she’ll always be that girl in pigtails to me.”
“I wonder where she was headed that night. Maybe to meet with him?”
“Will you quit talking about it?”
“What if he’s a good guy? Maybe he doesn’t know what happened to her.”
“Or maybe he’s hiding now like some sniveling little coward.”
Miranda sucked in her breath. “I wonder if he has her phone.”
“So does that mean he was with her that night? In the car even?”
“Do we know for sure Cassie was even driving?”
Jason swore. “You trying to get us killed here? I’m about to seriously freak out.”
“All right, calm down. I’ll check into the police report.”
Reaching for the radio, Jason clicked the ’80s hard rock station. He cranked the volume until the bass vibrated Miranda’s teeth.
The first levels of the hospital parking lot were full, with only a few empty stalls left on the garage roof.
Several minutes later they were outside Cassie’s room.
“You ready?” Jason asked with his hand on the door. Miranda nodded.
The room was quieter than normal when they walked in. Miranda slowly pushed back the curtain concealing Cassie’s bed.
Cassie’s eyes were closed as though she were still sleeping. An unexpected pang of disappointment reverberated through Miranda. What were you thinking? she scolded herself. She’d be in here playing solitaire?
“Hi Chickee.” Miranda scooped up her sister’s hand and gave it three soft squeezes. “How are you doing today?”
Cassie’s hands twitched inside her own. Miranda gasped. “She moved her hand!”
Jason grinned as he grabbed the other one. “Hey, princess. I hear you’re feeling not so sleepy.”
Cassie took a deep breath at his voice. Miranda froze to watch for more movement, then rubbed her sister’s hand like she was trying to start a fire. “Can you hear me? Cassie?”
Her sister cracked her eyes, watery and unfocused.
“Hi, baby girl. It’s me, your Sis.” Miranda couldn’t keep the sob out of the last word.
Cassie stared up at her sister, then closed her eyes again. She opened them, and her lips tried to form a word.
“Oh, Chickee, your lips are so dry.” Miranda grabbed one of the pink mouth sponges from the table and dipped it into the glass of water, before dabbing her sister’s mouth.
Cassie’s eyes fell shut again. Clearing his throat, Jason jiggled her other hand. “Hey, don’t forget you owe me fifty bucks,” he joked. “I’m not letting you off the hook.”
Her blue eyes opened again focused on Miranda. Her mouth moved silently. Miranda leaned down to hear. “What is it?”
“Leave.”
Miranda sat back as though slapped. She looked at Jason in shock. He stared back at her, looking stunned himself.
“Cassie, you don’t mean that. Do you want me to go?”
Her sister’s mouthed it again, a little weaker this time, “Leave.”
Miranda’s eyes filled with tears. “I love you, Cassie. I’m so sorry.” She kissed her sister’s hand, then turned and stumbled out of the room.
A nurse came running over as Miranda tried to wipe her face. “Have you been in there to see her?” she asked, with a wide smile. “She had her eyes open earlier.”
Miranda nodded.
The nurse patted Miranda’s arm. “Overwhelming, isn’t it?”
Miranda’s lip quivered and she pressed them together. Unable to speak, she nodded again.
The door opened then, and Jason came out. His eyes softened when he saw her. “Come here.” He grabbed her in his arms.
“I knew this was going to happen. I knew it.” Miranda’s control broke and she cried on his shoulder. He rocked her slowly.
“It’s going to be okay.”
“How is this ever going to be okay?” Miranda pushed away from him. He dropped his hands as his face flickered with hurt. “What am I supposed to do now?”
“I’ll give you my truck keys. You can head home and I’ll catch a ride later.”
“You’re staying here? What are you, playing both sides?”
Jason’s eyebrows flew up. “You better be careful what you’re saying.”
Miranda covered her face with her hands. “Just leave me alone. Go be her savior.”
“I’m nobody’s savior, Miranda. I’m just trying to be here for her. Why don’t you think of someone else besides yourself?”
“This is why I felt like I could never come back. This moment right here. What I did was unforgivable.”
He sighed. “Maybe you need to worry about forgiving yourself, and take the pressure off the rest of us to make you feel better. I’m going back in there. I can’t deal with this right now.” He pulled his keys from his pocket and pushed them into her hand. Then, yanking the door open, he closed it firmly behind him.
Miranda could hardly see when she climbed into the truck. She didn’t bother to wipe the tears as she drove. Jason’s words were ringing in her head.
She slammed her fist on the steering wheel. It’s true! Oh my gosh, it’s true! All of her worries, her need to be forgiven, even the shame she felt, it was all about her.
She pulled over at a gas station and grabbed the phone from her purse. Pulling up Jason’s number, she texted.
- I’m sorry. I was wrong.
She sent it, then dropped her head against the headrest. A horn honked behind her. Miranda jerked upright and glanced in her rearview mirror. A truck idled behind her, blocked from getting to the pump. “I’m sorry,” she yelled, and waved out the window, before pulling ahead into a parking stall. After a moment, she glanced at the phone. Still no response. Please Jason, please just read the text. She rifled through her purse for a tissue. Finding a crumpled one, she scrubbed at the tears on her face.
She grabbed the phone again.
Relief or fear flashed through her, she couldn’t tell which, when she saw that he read it. Then:
-It’s okay. I’m sorry too.
She started tearing up again. Quickly she texted back. - No! You were totally right! I’m an idiot
- only when you feed my dog
- thanks for being there for her
- It’s going to be okay. Give her time
- Jason
- ?
- you’re my best friend.
- mine too
Chapter Twenty Present
Jason had stopped at the hospital again after work. As he left he called to let Miranda know he was on his way home.
“Did Cassie mention me?” Miranda asked.
She heard a deep exhale on the other end. “No. I’m sorry.”
There were a few beats of awkward silence as both of them struggled with what to say next. It had been a hard couple of days.
Miranda closed her eyes tightly. “Yeah, sure. I get it.
”
“Give it time. She’ll come around, I know it.”
She nodded, then realized he couldn’t see her. “She’s getting better. That’s all that matters.”
“Okay, well I’m getting pizza. I’ll be home soon.”
She hung up and tossed the phone on her bed, before studying herself in the mirror over her dresser. Then, she blew out a big breath. It was time to get ready.
The two of them had decided that they needed a break. Jason was having some buddies over for poker, so she’d made plans for the night too. She was going with Claudia and another gal from work out to the local karaoke bar. At the last minute, Miranda had invited the neighbor’s wife, Susan, to join them since Doug, her husband, was coming to poker night.
Twenty minutes later Miranda heard the screen door bang open, and Jason throw his keys on the counter. She could hear him rattling the bag of chips and then the fridge door open. He’s searching for the ranch dip. She bit her lip and looked at the jar of dip sitting on the edge of the dresser, next to a few Frito crumbs.
Miranda glanced out her window just in time to see Claudia’s Toyota speed the length of the driveway.
Jason yelled up to Miranda, “Get down here! They’re here!”
“Well, let them in.”
“Geez, what am I, a butler?” he yelled back, then shoved a chip into his mouth. Crunching, he opened the front door.
The woman standing there wore a skin tight dress and six inch heels. She walked into the house slowly, giving Jason a long look. He stopped in mid-crunch at her obvious perusal. “You must be…”
“Hi, I’m Claudia.” She smiled. “And you must be Jason. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
He raised his eyebrows.
“But obviously not enough.” She walked in, her high heels hitting the floor with a confident clack. At the kitchen counter she turned around.
“Where is she?”
Jason shrugged, eyeing the other two women following her. “Still upstairs, I guess.”
“Miranda!” Claudia called. “You better hurry down here! Before I take your roommate instead.”
“I couldn’t go anyway.” Jason gestured to the food and card table. “Poker night.”
“Too bad for you.” Claudia winked. “It could have been a night you’d never forget.”
Jason blinked. “Miranda!” he hollered up the stairs.
Claudia whispered something to the other two women. Jason felt like his collar was getting too tight. Where the heck was she?
“I’m coming! Sheesh!” Miranda slammed her bedroom door. She came sideways down the stairs because her skirt was so short, her cowboy boot heels clunking cheerfully.
Jason’s eyebrows flew up his brow. Claudia nudged her friend and they watched him, laughing.
“Err,” he mumbled, unable to quit staring at her tan legs. “Where’s the rest?”
“The rest of…”
“Your skirt.”
Miranda rolled her eyes, before flipping her shiny, dark hair over her shoulder.
“I’m serious, you can barely move in that thing or you’ll show off your goods!”
“Oh, I know exactly how to move in this skirt.” She stroked his stubbly cheek gently. “Don’t you worry.” Her vanilla scent wafted over him.
Claudia was grinning ear to ear. She ushered Miranda towards the door. Jason looked panicked as they headed outside.
“Be careful, okay?” he called, hanging on to the door jam.
“Well, aren’t you just precious,” Claudia said, patting his arm. “Don’t worry, we’re going to take good care of her. It’s my aim to find her a good man.” She gave him another wink, then strode off ahead of the women.
“Climb in, girls! We’re going to have some fun tonight!”
They got into the car and buckled up. Claudia sped out on to the road. Miranda was sucked back into her seat. “You don’t mess around, do you?” she asked.
“I’ve got places to go and people to see.” Claudia shifted and stomped on the gas with her pink stiletto.
Just then Miranda felt the buzz of her phone. She pulled it out from her bra to read the text.
- Hey don’t be drinking anything unless you buy it yourself
She shook her head and texted back, - I know
She went to slide the phone back into place, but he shot a text back immediately.
- Don’t leave your drink either.
“What’s that boy saying to you?” Claudia asked.
“He’s worried about my drinks.”
“You tell that boy if he bothers you tonight, I’m taking that phone away. This night’s about you, and you having a good time!”
Miranda quickly texted, - Thanks. GTG
She powered the phone off and showed it to Claudia, who nodded approvingly. This was going to be a fun night.
***
Jason stared at the text message, wondering how to respond to it. He sure hadn’t been expecting Miranda to come down in that skirt. He gave a deep exhale before placing the phone on the counter.
He grabbed the phone and checked it again. No new texts. He set the phone down a little harder.
Okay, play it cool. Pull it together. He ripped open the pizza boxes and pulled out the frozen pizzas. Then, turning on the oven, he threw them on the racks.
There was pounding at the door, and then Doug let himself in. Trailing behind him was the rest of the gang, Jarrod and Luke.
“You ready to lose your money?” Doug smirked. “I’ve been playing this game since you were in diapers.”
“Bring it, Grandpa,” Jason smirked. Doug was thirty-two, and still very fit, but Jason couldn’t resist the dig.
Two hours later it was a different story.
"You know.” Doug grinned. “Your cards aren't going to get any better by worrying whether to fold or not."
"Well, some of us don't get pocket aces to start our hands and have to actually think when we play,” Jason said, staring hard at his cards.
"If by thinking you mean, 'Bet a lot of money on a bad hand,' then you have that strategy cornered.” Doug flipped his toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other.
Jarrod and Luke both laughed. Jason shot them a dark look.
”Yeah, I'm folding.” Jason tossed his cards on the table.
“That's how you lose all your money. Dude, this is the worst I’ve ever seen you play!” Doug laughed at him and scooped up the pile of money.
Jason groaned. “Just trying to let you win some of your money back.”
“Win some of my money? I’m starting to feel guilty for wiping you clean.”
Jason pushed out his chair and walked to the kitchen for another beer.
Maybe he should check his phone one more time.
He had a text. Eagerly he opened it. It was a video from Claudia. “How’d she get my number?” he thought.
He clicked play. The grainy video was dark, but he still could make out Miranda on the stage, with Susan, Doug’s wife. They were belting out the words to, “Baby, I’ve Got All Night.” Jason’s grin grew wider.
Miranda was doing a pretty good job, despite nearly tipping over once when she reached for the mic stand. At the end she did a curtsey, and tottered off the stage. Freaking adorable.
“Hey, Doug.” He waggled an eyebrow. “Want to see your wife?”
“Wha—” Doug said. Shouts erupted from around the table. “Give me that.” Doug snatched the phone from Jason. His eyebrows nearly hit his hairline when Susan blew the crowd a kiss, and some young stud gave her his hand to help her off the stage.
“Hey, let me see that video.” Luke joked. Doug gave him a death glare.
“Lets play cards,” Doug growled. Three hands later, he was wiped out. “Don’t worry, Doug. Your wife still has her singing career,” Luke said.
Jason rubbed his mouth to hide his smile. Doug shoved back his chair and yanked his keys out of his pocket. “Laugh it up. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.” Luke’s smile faded a bit. Doug w
as his superior at Boeing.
The energy seemed to have left the room when Doug went home. The other two guys gathered their stuff and said goodbye.
Jason picked up the empty beer bottles and chip bags. He was wiping the table when Claudia’s car rattled up the driveway to drop Miranda off.
“Oh, baby, you know how I love it,” Jason sang as she walked into the house.
“Shut up!” Miranda blushed and tossed her purse on the island.
Jason sashayed around the island, leaning against it like a cabaret singer on a piano. “Never think I’m above it.”
“She sent that to you, didn’t she?” Miranda frowned and unzipped her purse to pull out her phone. “I’m going to kill her.”
Jason stabbed at his phone for a second and Miranda heard the notes of the song. He turned the screen towards her. Yep, there she was, hanging on to the mic for dear life, laughing at Susan as they bawled the song into each other’s faces. Well, at least the audience had loved it.
Miranda groaned and reached for the phone. “Give it to me.”
He held it just out of reach, lip-syncing with her horrible out of tune video.
“Give it to me now!” She jumped for the phone.
He held it overhead. “You want to sing it for me? Live? That might be worth giving you the phone.”
“I’ll get you for this, Jason. Don’t you think I won’t.”
He pantomimed his hands shaking with fear, before tipping his head back, using the phone like a mic. “Baby, it’s just you for me!”
“I’m going to ignore him,” Miranda muttered out loud and spun her hair back into a messy bun. Her stomach growled, and suddenly she was starving. She pulled open the door to the fridge. No grocery shopping for a week, and it showed on her shelf.
There was a carton of Chinese food. She side-eyed where he was, out of sight, and reached for the carton.
“What do you think you’re doing?” He sprung up from the other side of the refrigerator door. Miranda screamed. Jason’s face cracked into a huge smile.
“Grrr.” Miranda reached in to the fridge and defiantly took out the carton.
Jason watched with arched eyebrows.
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