by Donna Hill
“Large or small?”
“Large.”
“Coming right up. Yours will be out shortly,” she said to Ron and Ali.
“What brings you out in all this weather?” Ron asked.
Stephanie’s thoughts shifted back the original reason she’d come out in the first place—to make up with Tony. She focused on the smoothie menu. “Wasn’t anything like this when I came out,” she said sideways, avoiding his question. “What about you two?”
“We were getting our pool game on,” Ali said. “Came outside and…” He extended his large hand toward the window that was now frosted with snow and ice.
“A real mess,” Stephanie murmured. She gazed at Ali. “You seem so familiar to me, and not from the other day.” Her expression creased as she tried to place him. “I can’t think where I know you from.”
He shifted a bit in his seat. “I guess I have one of those faces. They say everyone has a twin.”
“Hmm.” She shrugged it off. “So you and Ron work together?”
“Yeah, my old buddy put me on the team.” He patted Ron on the back.
“How long have you been in New York?”
“A couple of months. I was in Chicago for a while, then L.A., Florida. Got tired of the hurricanes so I came here.”
“He’s being modest. He failed to mention that during his travels he was responsible for setting up mentoring programs for troubled kids in all of those cities.”
Ali looked mildly embarrassed.
“That is impressive. How many programs do you have in place?”
“Eight that I manage.”
“You should be so proud.”
“It’s the least I can do. There are so many kids out there just drifting with nothing in their futures but trouble or worse.”
“Ever think about starting something here?” Stephanie asked, totally fascinated. There was a special place in her heart for anyone who reached out to those less fortunate, especially kids.
“Actually I have. Not sure yet how I will go about it.”
“I’d love to help if I could.”
“I’ll definitely keep that in mind.”
Ron snapped his fingers. “Not to change the subject but maybe you can help. Ali’s been looking for a place. You think Ann Marie might be able to help him find something?”
“I don’t see why not. I’ll ask her. Are you looking to buy or rent?”
“Rent for the time being. I like my freedom. Not sure if I want to tie myself to a house.”
“I’ll have Ann Marie give you a call. What’s your number?” She took out her Axim and put in his number as he dictated it.
“I really appreciate that.”
She stuck the PDA back in her purse. “No problem. If Ann Marie can’t find you something, there’s nothing to be found. She’s like a bloodhound when it comes to locating property.”
A waitress arrived with their orders. “Will there be anything else?”
They all said no.
“Ron tells me you’re part of the fabulous foursome.”
Stephanie giggled. “Oh, we have a name?”
“What’s your role?”
“I’m the publicist.”
“Stephanie was responsible for getting the spa some major news coverage. Now she has her own business.”
Ali looked into her eyes and smiled. “That’s wonderful. Congratulations,” he said in a quiet voice. “Running your own business takes a lot of hard work.”
“No harder than what you do. I can only imagine the number of lives you’ve changed. I try to stay on top of things—it’s the publicist in me. But I have to admit I’ve never heard your name mentioned or seen any write-ups about your work.”
“I try to keep a low profile, stay behind the scenes, not out front. It’s not about me, but about the kids.”
She took a sip of her soup. “I’d like to hear more about it—the behind-the-scenes look.”
“Okay.” He took a bite of his veggie burger and chewed thoughtfully. “I guess the idea came to me…”
He talked about how he saw so many aimless young men in his neighborhood with nothing on their minds and no future on the horizon. And how things for young black Americans had deteriorated since the height of the Civil Rights movement. He knew he couldn’t resurrect the Panthers, but he could use what he’d learned about discipline and self-respect to the kids. He called on a few friends and they started hanging on the street corners and in the parks talking to the young boys. Before they knew it there was a regular group that would get together in the park twice a week, and the numbers kept growing. He and his friends put their money together and rented a storefront. They’d bring different speakers in to talk to them about life, sex, drugs, education, and the opportunities available to them. One storefront led to another and another.
“Amazing,” she said. “Do you work with young girls?”
He nodded. “We just started working with young girls about a year ago in Florida. We need more women volunteers, but it’s coming together.”
“Like I said, if you ever decide to bring your program to New York I’d be willing to help.” She finished off her soup and wiped her mouth with the paper napkin. “This has been great. Just what I needed on a day like today. But…” She pushed back from the table. “I need to get home.” She reached in her purse for her wallet.
Ali held up his hand. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Aw, go on,” Ron said, “between two hardworking men we can handle a bowl of soup.”
She laughed. “Correction, large bowl. Thanks.” She extended her hand to Ali. “It was really nice to officially meet you.”
He held her hand, a soft smile on his lips. “The pleasure was mine.”
Her eyes ran over his face and she felt an odd sense of comfort. She turned her attention to Ron. “Always good seeing you. Make sure you keep our girl happy.”
He pressed his hand to his chest. “That’s the most important job I have.”
Stephanie chuckled and put on her coat.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” Ali offered.
“I’ll be fine. And I promise I won’t fall. Good night.”
“Night,” they said in unison.
Ali watched her leave, then slowly sat down in his seat.
“You okay?” Ron asked. “You have this dazed look in your eyes.”
Ali ducked his head to hide his embarrassment. “Just thinking, that’s all.”
Ron looked toward the door. “She’s a little young for you if that’s what you’re thinking.”
Ali hesitated for a moment. “Look, there’s something I want to tell you. But you gotta swear you won’t say anything. Not now, maybe never.”
Chapter 12
The moment Stephanie entered her empty apartment the events of earlier in the day came rushing back with a vengeance.
Tony and another woman—and a child. She took off her coat and hung it on the shower rod in the bathroom. She still couldn’t believe it, or rather she didn’t want to believe it.
How could he have professed loving her, wanting her to move in with him when he was obviously involved with someone else? Was the child his? A physical pain gripped her insides at the thought.
It was over. Plain and simple. She went into her bedroom, tossed her purse on the bed, and got out of her clothes. Suddenly bone weary, she sat down on the side of the bed. She reached for her bag, took out her phone, and put it on the nightstand with the intention of charging it before she turned in for the night.
She flopped back on the bed in her underwear and stared up at the ceiling. She’d get over this just like she’d gotten over every other hurdle and disappointment in her life. One day at a time. She had more important things to worry about besides feeling sorry for herself.
Good riddance, Anthony Dixon. She got under the covers and turned out the light. Tomorrow was another day and she intended to start it off feeling a helluva lot better than she did at the moment.
When Stephanie awoke the following morning she was alarmed to realize that it was still snowing. She tossed off her teal blue down comforter and put her feet down on the wood floor. She flinched from the cold that slapped the bottoms of her feet.
Bending over she peeked under the dust ruffle for her slippers. Shoving her feet into her Lugs, she walked over to the window.
Nothing was moving. Cars parked on the street looked like rows of igloos on a residential block in Alaska.
Briskly she rubbed her arms as the numbing chill begged to get inside her comfy bedroom. Jeez, the weatherman didn’t know jack. All that fancy equipment and they couldn’t predict a major freaking snowstorm.
She turned away, annoyed. There was no doubt that she was pretty much grounded for the day. From the looks of things outside, the plows hadn’t even come through her street yet.
She went off to the kitchen and took out her favorite ginger and honey tea and put on a kettle of water to boil while she got herself together in the bathroom.
By the time she’d cleaned the sleep from her eyes and brushed her teeth until they gleamed, she heard the kettle whistle.
As she poured the boiling water over the teabag in the cup she wondered what she was going to do with herself all day, and more important, what was she going to eat? To say her cupboards were bare was an understatement. Looking at Stephanie’s kitchen, one would think that she loved to cook. Her kitchen was state-of-the-art with every kind of utensil imaginable. Stainless steel pots hung from a ceiling rack that matched the stainless steel freezer and built-in range. All of which were merely attractions for the eye but sparked no desire in her to learn her way around the kitchen.
She pulled open the fridge hoping to perhaps find a carton of Chinese food that she could warm up in the microwave. But all she saw was a half carton of half-and-half and the Tupperware of leftover soup that she and Tony had shared.
She pushed the door shut. Was he still with that woman? Why should she give a damn? She’d wanted out of the relationship anyway. It was stupid of her to pop up at his apartment like she’d done. Stupid to think…Who was she? Was that their child? How could he not have told her?
“Agggh. I’m not going to make myself crazy. I’m not!”
She poured her cup of tea and took it to the living room, sat down on the love seat, then turned on her thirty-two-inch plasma television. It was another treat to herself after landing a successful account while she’d worked for Conrad at H. L. Reuben.
That was one of the things she missed about working for a large corporation—the perks. While she’d been employed she had an expense account, annual bonuses, a hefty commission on top of her high five-figure salary. All those perks and the solid cash base had all helped to cover Samantha’s care. She knew she’d worked hard, she had to. It was the major reason why she became involved with Conrad in the first place and why she continued the affair. Her relationship with him guaranteed her the financial security she needed to care for Samantha, and that was more important than anything else. No matter what the cost to herself.
She finished off her tea and set the cup in the sink. But that didn’t make it right, she admitted. There should never be a “good reason” why one had an affair with someone who was married. What goes around comes around, she thought as she wandered back into her bedroom. Now she was seeing how it felt to have someone you loved be with someone else.
She stopped short. Her heart jerked in her chest. Love? Who the hell was in love? She shook her head. Even if it were possible for her it was over now.
“I need to get ready to head back to the city,” Tony said to Leslie.
He’d spent the past two days at his sister’s home in New Haven and they’d talked like they hadn’t in a very long time. He told her all about Stephanie and how much he loved her, that she was the first woman to claim his heart since Kim when he thought that loving again was impossible. He told her about his invitation to come and live with him and her reaction. Leslie’s advice was to give Stephanie some time, and just as he had his reasons for living his life the way he did, Stephanie surely had her reasons as well. Instead of going off half-cocked, what they needed to do was talk—honestly—about their hopes and their fears.
Leslie put the frying pan in the sink and ran hot water over it, then turned to her brother. “It’s been great having you here.” She wiped her hands on a yellow-and-white-checkered dish towel. “Especially for Joy.”
He nodded slowly. “It’s been good for me too. I never realize how much I miss her until I see her again.”
Leslie leaned back against the edge of the sink. “She really needs you, Tony.” Her eyes implored him.
He turned away, crossed the room, and sat down at the kitchen table. “I know it’s hard for you to understand, for anyone to understand. Every time I look at Joy I see Kim. And I know that her not being here is my fault, that Joy not having a mother is my fault.” He shook his head vigorously. “The guilt eats away at me.” His voice broke. “And even more so when I see Joy.”
“Tony.” She crossed the room and sat down opposite him. “It wasn’t your fault. You have to believe that.”
“Then whose fault is it?” he snapped at her. “I knew Kim should never have gotten pregnant. The doctors said it could kill her. But I let it happen and then I let her go through with it anyway—knowing the risks.”
“But Kim knew the risks, too. She loved you and wanted to give you her love, and the result was Joy. You didn’t trick her into getting pregnant. Besides, there was no guarantee that she would go into crisis during delivery.” She lowered her gaze. “But she did.”
“The doctors said it was possible—very possible. The strain of labor could easily set off a sickle cell crisis.”
That day in the hospital bloomed before him. Kim had been getting weaker with each passing day. During the last four months of her pregnancy she’d had three major episodes that put her in the hospital. The baby was in danger and the doctors wanted to do a C-section. But the risks of delivery too early were just as high as waiting it out as long as possible.
“Maybe we should let them do the operation,” he’d said to her as he held her hand. He pulled his chair closer to the hospital bed.
She shook her head. “No. They’ve said the baby is very small. She’s already struggling. I want to give her a chance, Tony. Please.”
“I don’t want to lose you, Kim. I swear I don’t think I can—”
“Shh, don’t. We’re going to get through this. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and our child.” She smiled weakly. “It’s what I want.”
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it, willing his strength to flow through her veins. He would do anything on earth to stop her pain, stop the suffering and the agony he’d witnessed her go through. He rested his head on the side of her bed while she stroked his hair. It was one of the many favorite things she did. He loved the feel of her tiny hands on him. They were incredibly soft and gentle from the very first time they’d met.
She was a cashier at a Barnes and Noble bookstore on Fourteenth Street in the Village. He’d walked in one evening after a photo shoot when he’d spotted a poster in the window announcing that James Patterson was doing a book signing. When he went inside, the store was packed. He couldn’t get anywhere near one of his favorite authors. So he’d decided to walk around and see if he could find something to read. He was in the mystery aisle scanning the shelves.
“Can I help you find something?”
The voice sounded like it came from one of heaven’s angels. When he turned she was smiling up at him. She was what would certainly be considered tiny. She stood no more than five feet five, and if she weighed more than one hundred pounds it would be a miracle. Her skin was the color of sautéed butter, thick black lashes framed wide doe-shaped eyes the color of midnight, her cheekbones were the kind that you dream of, and her mouth was so rich and lush you wanted to sink onto the soft pillows of her lips. Her inky dark hair hung
to the middle of her back, and he could imagine it fanning out around her as she lay beneath him on his bed. He was totally mesmerized and for a moment couldn’t speak.
She angled her head to the side. “Did you find what you were looking for?” she asked.
He ran his tongue across his suddenly dry lips. “Uh…just browsing.”
“Okay. Enjoy.” She turned to leave.
“Wait!” he said much too loud.
“Yes?” Curiosity danced in the darkness of her gaze.
“Uh, maybe you could suggest something.”
She returned to his side and the soft scent of her, nearly undetectable, floated gently around her and enveloped him.
“What are you interested in?”
“A good mystery. Love figuring things out.” He slid his hands into his pockets to keep from shifting a strand of her silken hair away from her face.
She turned toward the shelves and put her finger to her lips as she scanned the volumes, and Tony wished he were that finger. She reached for a book but wasn’t quite able to get to it. Tony leaned toward her.
“This one?” he asked and his hand brushed hers. A shock rushed through his veins.
They both felt it. Her eyes snapped toward him. They laughed. The tension dispelled.
“Yes, that’s the one. It just came in.”
He took the book down from the shelf. “If you say it’s good, I’ll go with it.”
She stared at him as if she wanted to say something, but didn’t.
“Are you a mystery buff?”
Her smile was shy. “Horror and sci-fi.”
His brow rose and a slow grin stretched his mouth. “I’m impressed. I figured you go for romance.”
Her eyes raked him up and down. “Nothing wrong with a little romance.”
“Touché. Anything you can recommend in that department?”
“Excuse me, miss, do you work here?”
Kim turned to the woman who’d come up behind her. “Yes, how can I help you?”
“I’m looking for a book for my teenage son. He needs it for a school report.” She handed Kim a list.