***THE END***
THE INSIDE-OUT, UPSIDE-DOWN PILLOW GODDESS
By Fusako Tsuji
Once upon a time, there was a mother and a daughter who lived together in a village in Japan. This is their story.
One night in the Fall, the mother, Kiku, was washing some vegetables she had brought in from their field when her daughter, Tae, slipped in the back door.
"Mom, I don't feel good," she said. "My body feels achy all over." She went to close the door behind her, but before she could, a cold wind blew in and sent a shiver down Kiku's spine. She knew that if Tae got even just a little cold, she would get sick. She always did.
"Close the door," she said, flustered. "And go lie down in your futon. I don't want you to get sick."
Tae climbed right into her futon without eating, but it wasn't long before her breathing became ragged and she started to pant. Kiku knew even without looking that her temperature would be high. It always was.
"Don't worry, Tae," she soothed, dipping a rag into some cold water and wiping her forehead. "You're going to get better. Your mother's here."
Her tiny eyes filled with tears, Tae looked up at her mother and gave a small nod. But even though Kiku stayed up all night sponging and looking after her daughter, in the morning her temperature had only gone down a little.
"Mom, I want to go out and play with the kids," Tae said.
"I know you do, dear. I want to let you go outside and play, too, but you have to stay in bed a little bit longer." Kiku tried to stay calm and keep the worry out her voice, but it was difficult. Tae's fever was still high.
Three or four days later on the road home from her vegetable field, Kiku saw a woman in a white kimono, the kind of clothes someone wears for a religious pilgrimage, but just now she was doubled up in pain beside the road.
"Hey, are you alright?" Kiku asked her. "Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Ohhh," moaned the poor woman. "My stomach's so sore. I can't go on."
"If you can just go a little further, you'll come to my house," Kiku said. "Grab onto my shoulders. I'll help you there."
"Thank you, thank you," said the woman, grimacing in pain. "I'm sorry, but it's so painful, almost like I met the Buddha in hell."
Holding on to the poor woman, Kiku took her to her house. "You'll stay the night," she told the stranger gently, boiling up some rice gruel from the reserve she kept aside for emergencies.
The woman's name was Mitsu and before long, thanks to Kiku's good care, she was back to her normal self. Holding her hand out to Tae, her eyes began to fill with tears.
"How old is your daughter?" she asked. "About six?"
"Yes," Kiku answered.
"My child was about the same age when she passed away," wept Mitsu. "She caught a terrible sickness, dysentery, and within a day she was gone. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about her."
"I'm sorry," Kiku said. "Do you think about her while you walk around from temple to temple? That's so sad."
"I'm really grateful for your help by the side of the road today," Mitsu said. "I'd like your daughter to grow up strong and healthy, not like mine. To show my thanks, I'm going to pray for her to the Buddha from now on."
"I'd appreciate that," Kiku said. "She's always been so sick and I'm afraid that someday the same thing that happened to your daughter may happen to her. We're all alone. Sometimes I don't know what to do."
"Oh, don't say such a sad thing," shuddered Mitsu. "I know! This is near Seki, right? There's a place in Seki called Kami-shiro-gane where you can go and cure even the worst sicknesses. I've heard that there's a kind Goddess that lives there. She has a small shrine next to White Mountain Temple. Why don't you go there and pray for her help?"
"What?" Kiku cried. "You mean to tell me that there's a place like that near here? And anyone can go? Thank you. Thank you."
Kiku had listened gratefully to what Mitsu had to say and thought about it carefully. Once all the work in the fields was finished, she left Tae with a married couple in the neighbourhood and went to visit the Goddess with Eleven Faces at Kami-shiro-gane in Seki. Just about where the road to Kami-shiro-gane was, she stopped to talk to a farmer working in his fields.
"Is White Mountain Temple near this forest," she asked him.
"Aah," nodded the farmer wisely. "You're going to pray at the temple aren't you?"
"I heard that there's a small temple for the Goddess of Mercy near there," Kiku said. "My young daughter gets sick too easily. I thought I'd go there and ask for help. I wonder what the best way to pray to her is. I've never done this before."
"Yep, just what I thought," said the farmer. "You're going to pledge yourself to the Goddess. What you've got to do is pray to her as hard as you can for three days and three nights without eating anything, only a little water. Inside the temple, there's a pillow. If that pillow raises up in the middle of the night, it's good. When your wish comes true, it'll flip over and turn inside out. That's the way the Goddess lets you know she's heard your prayers."
"What a kind soul!"
"It's important to put all other thoughts out of your mind, though," warned the farmer. "And you've got to pray with all your heart or she might not hear you."
Kiku thanked him and, thinking warm thoughts in her heart, rushed up the road to the small shrine. She peeked inside and saw that it was only as big as eight tatami mats wide. In the corner, were three pillows. She went in and changed into a white kimono just like the one Mitsu had been wearing on the side of the road.
"I'll pray three days and three nights without eating just like the farmer said," Kiku decided. "But surely it's even better if I don't sleep at all. I can do it. I know I can."
Next, she drew up some water from a small well that was beside the shrine. First, she offered some to the Goddess. Then, she put some in a bucket for herself. She went back into the shrine and sat down in the best place to pray.
"Dear Goddess," she mumbled, clasping her hands together and begging over and over again as night fell. "I have a favour to ask you. A big one. I want you to make my daughter Tae healthy again."
Sitting there in the dark praying, Kiku began to remember Tae's birth.
"Look! It's a girl!" said the old mid-wife who had come to help with the birth. "You must be so happy. When she gets big, she'll be able to help you."
She could remember it all like it was yesterday. Her husband was fine then and he asked her to name the child Tae. Then he got sick and died. Now, Tae was the same way.
"Namu, kanze onbosatsu. Namu, kanze onbosatsu," she recited over and over again, begging the Goddess for help. A long time passed and, before she knew it, she'd fallen asleep. "Haa," she called out suddenly in her sleep, waking with a start on the floor. From the light creeping inside the shrine from outside, she knew that morning would come soon.
"Darn," she said. She had made up her mind to pray for three days and three nights straight and then dozed off on the very first night. She couldn't even carry out her own small promises.
"I'm so sorry, Goddess," she cried, tears falling on her white kimono. "Please forgive me. There's no excuse."
Then she pattered across the hall in her bare feet, running outside to the well, where she drew up a pail of water. It was as cold as ice. Only then, her heart beating rapidly, did she steal a peak at the pillows in the corner, but they still hadn't moved.
"That farmer said that it was okay to sleep and the pillow would rise up by itself," said Kiku, looking at the pillow reproachfully. "I wonder if a pillow can really do such a thing."
This is what happened the second night.
"Goddess, this time I promise I won't sleep," Kiku vowed. If I sleep, scold me. Wake me up."
"Namu, kanze onbosatsu. Namu, kanze onbosatsu," she prayed over and over again, her voice becoming husky with the effort.
She was inside the shrine, but she could feel the cold creeping in from outside. She would stay up all night praying she had promised the Godd
ess, but before she knew it she began to daydream about life in her own village. The place where she was born and the village where she came to live after she married were only one river apart. Kiku knew exactly where each left off and the next began. She remembered that the dividing line was a big oak tree beside the road which divided the two. Underneath it was a stone statue that turned colours in the changing seasons of
the mountain.
Suddenly, she could see someone walking across the bridge over the river in the distance. She waited and when they got close enough, she could see that it was Tae, who was starting to run faster and faster.
"Tae," she called out in spite of herself. "Don't run too fast! You'll fall!"
The sound of her voice woke her and she found herself alone on the temple floor. Once again, she'd failed to live up to her vow to the Goddess. She looked at the door and saw a small, thin line of morning light streaming in. There's just one more night left, she thought, crying. One more night to pray and make Tae healthy again. She hardened her determination and spurred herself on to devote herself to the Goddess until she could see Tae's healthy, smiling face before her.
"Tae, make your mother strong," she called out to her daughter in her heart.
This is about what happened in the middle of the third night.
"Namu, kanze onbosatsu. Namu, kanze onbosatsu, Namu, kanze onbosatsu. Namu, kanze onbosatsu,"," Kiku repeated over and over again, a dim light from around the Goddess's face reaching her eyes. From far away, she could hear a quiet, gentle voice like she had never heard before.
"Kiku," it said. "You have come all the way here to make your daughter healthy. For three days and three nights I have heard your prayers. Don't worry. I have heard them and understand. If you go back to your village now you will find something good waiting for you."
"Goddess," Kiku cried out in a loud voice, not really sure if it was her. It was like she was in a dream. Hugging the pillow and holding her breath, she moved her eyes a little at a time to the pillows in the corner.
"Ahh," she gasped in surprise. They were all of them turned inside-out and upside-down. Her prayer had been answered.
After that one year passed. Tae became completely healthy. And every day, morning and night, Kiku turned to face the Goddess, put her hands together and thanked her for answering her prayers. Soon, the story about what happened that night spread throughout Kami-shiro-gane, then down the valley to all the other villages, and the Goddess came to be called the "upside-down, inside-out pillow Goddess."
The Love of a Silver Fox: Folk Tales from Seki CIty Page 6